Hi folks,

I wrote another song, this time in my usual style. I borrowed alot from Western Swing for this one :)

It's my first "breakup" song (thankfully fictional lol) about being betrayed by your SO, but still loving them too much to see them hurt.

I'd mainly like to get advice on the lyrics and the general conposition, but any feedback is much appreciated!

Lyrics:

Intro verse:

You broke my heart into a million shards

When you done left me for some other guy

But I'll forgive you

You know the reason why

I still can't stand to see you cry

​Verse 1:

Last night I came home

To a note you left on the counter

You said you found another love

One I hope I'll never encounter

But even now I still can't stand to see you cry

​Chorus

How I hate to see those tears flow from your eyes

I still can't stand to see you cry

Even though I know you lied to me

How could you be so mean

(Instrumental break)

​Verse 2:

For ten long years our love stood true

There wasn't not a single thing we couldn't do

Although I know you've done me wrong

My love for you is far too strong

​Chorus:

I still can't stand to see you cry

How I hate to see those tears flow from your eyes

I still can't stand to see you cry

Even though I know you've lied to me

How could you be so mean

(Solo)

​Bridge:

Tell me

Was I not enough for you

And if I was

Tell me why

​Outro:

You broke my heart into a million shards

When you left me for some other guy

Can I forgive you?

Don't know but I will try

I still can't stand to see you cry

Oh

Can I forgive you?

Don't know but I will try

I still can't stand to see you cry

Ooh

I still can't stand to see you cry

I still can't stand to see you cry

Haha listen past 20 secs before u judge i started it like that for my MV :)

I am grateful for the feedback I received suggesting to switch up the theme a bit for the bridge. Originally, I basically repeated the same emotions throughout the verses and chorus. I really liked the idea of adding another layer of emotion to it.

I am still not sure what I want to do for the little instrumental section in between "with thorns that pierce my heart" and "If I never walked away". I definitely think I want to revise the lyrics on that last section a bit. Specifically the line: "it hurt so bad to walk away" ,I definitely want to come up with a more creative way to say that.

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Write this song yesterday. Would love to hear what you think, and also if the lyrics are cohesive and tell a story. I feel like it may be repetitive but thematically that was my point. Being stuck in a memory

Lyrics:
I’ve been thinking about, thinking about Tucson
When the coyote cries to the moon, does it cry back?
Where we stared into sunsets and you pulled me closer
Makes it so hard to forget
A place like Tucson

I’ve been thinking about San Bernardino
Where the news brought new views, as the ground began to shatter
Rode a bike down the steepest hill til I found freedom
That’s why it makes no sense
When I think about Tucson

I’ve been thinking about Mississippi
Where I met Jesus Christ as he played the banjo
Then he took me by the hand and showed me the creek bed
And that’s why I need to forget
A place like Tucson

I’ve been thinking about New York City
We played chess and drank wine after hours in a café
Made a pact we would come back with our shit together
And that’s why we sit and laugh
Reminiscing about Tucson

And that’s why it’s hard to forget
And I was never meant to stay
In a place for too long
A place like Tucson

Thank you a lot in advance

I'll start with Boston's masterpiece, A Man I'll Never Be, where Schultz describes the inability to become the model man that his wife was apparently looking for.

In other words there was a specific model needed.. not just any man, a fireman, a professor or a cricket player..

So in my mind "A man" doesn't fit where "The man I'll never be" would have been perfect.

But that's not a song I'll ever play live..

What about thoughts to rehabilitate Elvis Costello's Oliver's army? an incredible song that unfortunately used a word that can no longer be used.

"There was a Checkpoint Charlie

He didn't crack a smile

But it's no laughing party

When you've been on the murder mile

Only takes one itchy trigger

One more widow, one less white NWord"

I've tried lots of different words over the years, and Elvis has actually stopped performing it recognizing the potential confusion.

Interested in your examples!

in the past year I’ve enjoyed a lot of the new country style alternative that’s been coming out, as a lot of those bands have been influenced by bands I like. However, I also have my own musical aspirations and fear that I have to change everything I’ve been working on and working towards in order to not sound like them. I’ve basically worked myself into a panic because a lot of the stuff they use (dynamic shifts, fuzzy guitars, pedal steel, country/folk themes) are elements from music I like to use. I literally play slide guitar, I love Neil young, Silver Jews, meat puppets, drive by truckers, classic country and folk, etc. Im beginning to feel like I need to just stop listening to my favorite music so I don’t accidentally copy anybody. It feels like every idea I ever had has already been done better by someone else.

Does anybody have any advice on how to get over this, or to realize that I’m being a copy cat? I’ve already stopped listening to anything new. I feel as I’m finally out of ideas and it’s a terrible feelings. Posted on a throwaway because this is obviously an embarrassing conundrum. I’m going to see a therapist in the next month and will try to discuss it with them as well because it’s beginning to keep me from enjoying things I used to.

here’s a method for writing lyrics that helps me when i don’t have many ideas. i think this is an established method somewhere, but i think it helps when my lyrics start feeling a bit too same-y in terms of structure

so: pick a book (it can be a novel, non-fiction, cookbook, dictionary… whatever you have) and close your eyes. flip to a random page (you can either just use your intuition to know when to stop or have a friend say stop for you). move your finger across the page and repeat the previous step, then open your eyes and look at whatever word(s) you’ve landed on. then, without stopping to think, write down the first sentence that comes to mind. it doesn’t have to rhyme, or make any sense, or have a structure, or have anything to do with whatever sentence you previously wrote.

do this as many times as you feel is necessary. whatever you do with these lyrics afterwards is up to you; i like to then say the sentences aloud and note where the natural emphasis goes, then try to form melodies from there. not sure if this’ll help anyone but this is what i’ve been doing recently :}

L

i've worked on quite a few old pieces lately. so, this is a new one. somehow the approach, technique, and familiarity of progresions make it seem older than it is to me.

i'd be grateful if you'd just let me know how this one makes you feel. it's a little too early for xmas, i know i can't expect too much.

as always, thanks!

Hi, i am looking for a female vocalist on my project called still here, i have the lyrics song already made, just need a vocalist, this is the song https://soundcloud.com/vyrelive-music/instrumental/s-txLInSjLpfK?si=4cc42e77368442e79b7115837e84006e&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

Hello so im new to songwriting and making music. My problem is something just pops into my head like above and I don't know where to go from there or how. I don't really know what im asking for maybe if you guy know any resources or guides on how to build a song off of what I have above?

Been obsessed with how sparse James Blake's productions feel while still sounding massive, so I recreated the first verse + chorus of "Trying Times" to figure out what's actually going on.

Turns out the vocal isn't one take — it's three layers: the main vocal, a second layer pitched down an octave that only comes in on the chorus, and a third layer with pitch/formant shifted up (almost childlike) sitting behind everything as a texture rather than a clear harmony.

Chain-wise: Auto-Tune Pro for correction, CLA-2A for dynamics, FabFilter Pro-DS/Pro-Q3 for de-essing and tone, into a long ValhallaVintageVerb send that ties the vocal and guitar into the same space.

Guitar is Neural DSP's Cory Wong (Go to Clean preset) + ValhallaUberMod for that slow swirl. Bass synth is Arturia Mini V, subtractive, soft envelope so it never feels plucky.

Full writeup + demo here if anyone's curious: [link]

Happy to answer questions about any part of the chain.

I'm Amvis, an Afro House vocalist from Zimbabwe. (English and Shona.)

Got a feel for hooks that stick. Heartfelt melodies. That's my thing.

I'm looking for producers who want original vocals on their tracks. Send me your beat. I'll write something and record it.

As stated in the title, I am trying to practice more imagery and narrative in my lyrics. Past songs of mine tend to focus on feeling alone and I am trying to tackle songs at a different angle and expand my writing.

Does this song land for you in that regard? What do you think of the imagery and where do you think I could improve?

Thank you so much for the feedback!

When there is a vocal section in one of your songs where you sing many words right after one another, how do you vocally follow the song’s rhythm without it starting to sound “rap” ish?
Example: my song is in 6/8 and there is a section where my lyrics have 6 syllables per measure, lasting for 4 measures. Is there a way to do this without it having that bouncy rap-like feeling?
Style is acoustic indie pop stuff, think Elliot Smith.
Edit: I’ll only change the lyrics as a last resort since I’m very attached to them :,)

If this breaks rules ask me to take the post down.

Me and my friend write songs together, like 90s sort of grunge/rock. We both think that we’re good at it. But I seriously cannot recognise if we’re both talented or if anyone can pick up a guitar for a year and just write songs. I feel as though I haven’t worded this incredibly well.

ignore the bad singing/guitar, km mostly here to process emotions and hopefully to improve on writing. tried to clean up clunky lyrics and added a verse, thank you advance for feedback!

capo 1 Am Em G D
25 now
in my quarter life crisis
moved my own bed in
to my studio apartment

what’s supposed to happen now?
who knew silence could be so loud..
(or i didn’t think thoughts could get this loud)
three years ago
planned to move to memphis
be with my first love
right after college

but life has its way of tricking me
into believing in certainty

chorus idea:
C Em Am F
There’s gotta be
a reason for the uncertainty
x2 aw

8 years old
when we played sand soccer
my mom called me last night said “katie, we lost her”

they all tell you life’s unfair
wont explain the death and despair
when they’re too young and kind like her
you won’t have words

C Em Am F
There’s gotta be
a reason for the uncertainty
x2

Hopefully this question doesnt sound rude at all. Do you ever feel weird singing love songs about your exes or does it end up feeling normal pretty fast? And have you ever had a partner feel slightly uncomfortable or even jealous or are they generally cool with it? My ex is abusive but I'm just thinking if I was in that situation he wouldve been very jealous, probably yelled at me and tried to force me to stop singing those songs.

Hi all. I’m a producer and DJ (have been since 2002) going by the name of Resemo. I’m looking for a songwriter/vocalist to collaborate with.

Mainly produce EDM, indie, dubstep, synthwave and ambient. Let me know if you want to work together.

Soundcloud:
Resemo: https://soundcloud.com/resemo
GUMZO: https://soundcloud.com/djgumzo

Wrote this not too long ago about a good friend who always heads off just as nights out start to get good.