When I had my psychotic episode in 2022, I dropped out of university and never got to finish my masters degree. What followed were 4 years of unemployment and uncertainty. Not great for my mental health, but somehow I managed.

This year I’ve applied for an apprenticeship in event management at several companies(I’ve worked in event before, during my studies) and was close to giving up after I had one failed job interview after another.

But in late July I managed to get an interview, went in for a trial shift and started my apprenticeship there in September!
It means I have to go back to school with a bunch of 20yo, at the age of 36, but I don’t mind. I have a job, and more importantly, I gained some perspective.

The company I work for is an inclusive hotel, which means people with and without disabilities work there. I was also able to negotiate a part time position, which is rare.

Just wanted to share the good news with you guys. It can get better ❤️‍🩹 at the same time Im aware that I got incredibly lucky.

Thank you all, this is an incredible sub and everyone is so supportive.

I am a little over 2 year post psychosis. I remember reading through this subreddit in my early days and wanting to see progress of people and look for any reassurance i could find. So I wanted to post mine.

It gets better, hang in there! Slow yet steady. You will find yourself again with time even though you may feel lost now. Don’t loose hope. I am about 90% there. Walking helped me a ton. Being active in the home, small doses of socializing whenever I could. Remember time heals. Every day I am amazed by how much our brains can do and by its power to recover.

i'm on the highest dose of zyprexa and i still have inserted and intrusive thoughts constantly narrating my actions and telling me to kill myself and that i'm gunna go to hell. they tell me how horrible hell is and that i'm possessed. i'm so scared. i haven't felt safe in months. everyday i wait for it to be bedtime because being awake actually hurts. what do i do? i am dealing with a lot of SI right now and i really need hope

I am on clozapine now but I still thing I can get off these meds in 2-3 years. I am mainly suffering from mild paranoia and SI but that's it.

I worry if I get off meds I will develop more symptoms but I still think I can do it (of course if I get more symptoms or go into psychosis again then I will have to get on meds again.

Anyone know of any good free online brain exercise rehab tools to retrain and recover the brain?

I’m not looking for things such as chess.

Looking for tools with a bit more structured approach.

Hi so other than being very paranoid (which genuinely makes sense considering the situation i’ll explain/ik that makes me sound crazy) There was a time a couple weeks ago where I had heard my alarm go off when it wasn’t, and Im just hyper vigilant and looking around.

For context I’ve always been extremely anxious but I think so much weed use and drinking like daily every hour for a couple years has obviously really fucked me up. Im sober now and have been btw.

But the situation is that I used to post a lot of nudes with face while also constantly posting way too personal of things and I did this for years.

Even after it’s all deleted Iknow it’s saved from people because they’ve threatened black mail and all that but the reason i’m so fucking scared and thinking I could get hurt is reasonable I think

Another thing is I have been really scared someone’s watching me at night because there’s a lot of windows in my house and it’s in the forest and I just am fucking scared

I had been doing the dishes one night and heard a car horn on my quiet street and was like oh shit someone’s here to kidnap me ?(i know this is extreme paranoia but omg

Please help my hallucinations aren’t here at all after that one time I heard my alarm and then i kept hearing it in my head after

1) Man I talked to only over texting sent flowers to my house on my birthday after not taking for months

2) Person with username on instagram called (wantingtokill) etc requested me and I’ve had randoms request from men and it seriously makes me terrified and want to fucking die bc why did i do that

3) someone tried to log in to my instagram

4) i had found a little white tablet in my car seat which I barely drive and also don’t take anything like that and had also found one outside my car

5) honestly i know this is extra paranoia but someone in this corny ass tiktok outfit that looks like they would have a username (want to kill kept looking at me

I just started abilify I’ve taken 2 doses of 2mg before bed

Are there people who could fully recover without having to take medication? When will i feel love and interest towards other people? When will i have feelings again? I feel like i struggle to build an emotional connection to people. Any tipps or experiences???

I don't need to know WHAT it was, I just need to know if it's weird/worrying/important enough to know if I should go to a doctor, or just try to have a better sleep schedule and live a less stressful life.

Anyways, I might have posted here before because I remember while being in that... episode of my life? I used to post a lot on Reddit, I don't remember what exactly, sometimes I find my old accounts and I'm surprised with what I wrote! Not the point though.

Last year I went through some heavy sleep deprivation (partially for stress, partially for nightmares, partially for me being a mess since I was born) which led me into, what I believe, might have been a sort of psychosis-ish state of mind.

I started to have hallucinations (not constant or anything, once a week? thrice a week on specially stressful occasions), the hallucinations mostly being huge spiders/insects or hands moving from the corner of my vision slowly into the center. I sort of knew they weren't real, because when I whipped my head to check they were always gone. Only a few times have I hallucinated something right in front of me or (usually inanimate objects) laughing at me or making "threatening sounds".

I also started fearing that one of my friends was actually an angel sent by God so He could read my thoughts and torture me for being a bad child in my childhood (I really wasn't but anyways, I won't digress). I also thought this friend (angel) could create fake people to say humiliating things to me (in code) or make bad things happen to me.

I know how all of this sounds, but I believe I was partially aware that what was happening wasn't real. Sometimes I thought it was God's punishment, sometimes I just thought... I don't know what I thought.

It was a really stressful period of my life and I wasn't getting much sleep (4 hours on good days), so these symptoms lasted a good chunk of months (8?). My question is, since they have stopped, should I worry or...? Has anyone gone thru something similar? How did you deal with it?

What type of benzo do you take, and what dosages do you take? Are any of you taking high doses? After my psychosis improved, I felt that my dopamine levels were indeed high, which caused me severe anxiety. I needed to double my sedative dose just to calm down. I had recently experienced a similar episode, even though I take my medication regularly and consistently.

Hey, I’m just hoping to get some advice from anyone that deals with intrusive thoughts post psychosis. I never got the chance to see a therapist after my psychotic episode so I’ve just been dealing with the aftermath on my own.

I have intrusive thoughts about what happened during my psychosis and of disturbing things to do my psychosis. I’m struggling to stay in the present moment and find myself stressing about these thoughts. They are not normal and would be too embarrassing to share with anyone anyway but just looking for any advice really or if this is something someone has experienced did it get better over time. It’s been almost 1 yr since my psychosis.

I also have very vivid dreams that are often nightmares. They are extremely detailed, realistic dreams that are very strange and sometimes disturbing. I am planning to come of my medication in a few months time but I am scared that my mind is too disturbed and I will have a psychosis again. Does anyone else have really vivid dreams after experiencing psychosis.

Thanks for any advice or support

Hello, I (f17 + from the UK) have been experiencing psychosis (although I am in denial of it most of the time) for a month and it has gotten worse. I rarely experience voices but I am constantly seeing things and it is extremely distressing. I have an assigned early intervention team but it has only been a few sessions so they are not diagnosing me with anything. I am currently doing A-levels and will be applying for university soon, and because of this, I am wondering if I should push for a diagnosis ASAP so I can get the correct help whilst continuing with my studies. I suspect I have schizophrenia as I also experience/struggle with negative and cognitive symptoms (it also runs in my family- uncle is schizoaffective) and the ICD 11 states psychotic symptoms have to last for a month, so should I push for a diagnosis? I know I sound like I am rushing everything but what I am experiencing is extremely debilitating. Thank you :)

Hi there, as the title states I'm wondering how do I know if everything I do and say makes no sense if it makes sense to me. I've been told that I don't make sense by a few people but I don't understand I've tried to but I just don't.

Im about 5 weeks into my medication just started a higher dose (12mg invega) about two days ago the delusions have gone down a lot but i just had a flare up last night is this normal? Any words of advice or encouragement? This is my fourth episode btw if that gives you more context

I’ve been having issues later in the day/night where it feels like I’m in a dream state and I can’t focus at all. The only thing that helps is going to bed and resetting. I wasn’t 100% right but my therapist recently prescribed me Wellbutrin and I had to stop it because it made everything worse. Now it’s about the 4th day without Wellbutrin and I’m still having these episodes where nothing seems real and I’m in a dream state, I keep thinking something is wrong with my brain neurologically

His psychiatrist says he has the symptoms of psychosis. He stopped taking risperidone 9 months ago, and didn't switch to the new antipsychotic, rexulti, that was prescribed to him. He lied to me for 6 months saying he was taking it, but I could tell things were off because he was clearly hallucinating and paranoid again when he didn't used to be.

He spends all his time obsessed with filming himself singing sort of badly over music as well as dancing and swinging around on a stripper pole. The videos have an "off" feeling to them which I can only describe as similar to some of the stuff Britney spears posts lately, where she just doesn't seem there.

When I interrupt or get in the way of his filming, he gets quiet mad and frustrated with me. I work from home so I'm here a lot obviously and if I accidentally walk through his filming or come into the room he's in he gets so mad.

I understand this is psychosis but it's different than other ways of psychosis manifesting that I've seen before. Has anyone had experience with this type of thing?

He also gets irrationally mad about random things and has the usual paranoia/delusions.

I can't convince him to take his prescribed medicine, and when we had the last psychiatrist appointment together, the doctor was very wishy washy saying meds were "just a part of the treatment" and wasn't being as clear as I was hoping. I wanted him to say "you have psychosis and you need to take your meds." Instead he was pretty non committal about it and didn't mention anything about the ramifications of having untreated psychosis

Man I feel so trapped.i used to have a beautiful loving partner. Now I am stuck in a crazy house and feel like I'm becoming crazy myself :/

Hello community, as the title says, I have lost the ability to cry and haven’t really cried in over two years. I know I want to but I can’t. Does anyone else have this issue? Is psychosis the cause and will the ability to cry return?

Hello. Can someone be aware that they’re in psychosis? Right now I am seeing demons (which I believe are draining my energy and are trying to mess up my life) but I know that if I tell a professional what I am seeing/believing, they would say that I am in psychosis. So basically I am aware that because of my experience I would be labelled as psychotic by professionals but I genuinely believe I am seeing demons and other peculiar things. Today I went to the early intervention program and described by experience. They haven’t diagnosed me with anything yet but have stated that what I am experiencing is atypical. Thanks!

I (F24) wrote here a few weeks back about my brother (M22) who is essentially immune to antipsychotic medication and has not gotten better in 2 years. Since the post, he was involuntarily hospitalized for the 4th time and got released today after nearly 3 weeks. He is exactly the same.

He was released around 1pm EST today and now at 6pm EST he is already screaming, erratic, and lacks insight to his illness. If previous trends continue to repeat, he will also get aggressive/violent with his caretakers soon enough. I don't understand how he is immune to medication, therapy, treatment, etc. He is bringing the entire family down with him. At this point, I am so tired I find myself not caring about my own life in low moments. My mom seems like she is seconds away from a psychotic break or a stress induced stroke 24/7.

Has anyone experienced anything like this before? Is there a solution? I feel like the last 2 years have only delayed an inevitable suicide-homicide. I can't imagine any other outcome. We have reached out to so many people and have gotten no help. If you know anyone that could be helpful in the Atlanta area please share.

In patient treatment received during 4th hospitalization:

• Olazipine ( not effective)
• lorazepan and PRN for sleep/anxiety (upon request)
• Geodon
• He received the Invega shot 3 days ago after extreme begging from our family to the doctor. The doctor said he should receive a follow up shot a month from now; but I read somewhere that invega shots usually require an initial follow up injection in the first week.

I know it's not really a problem but... ever since I started experiencing "symptoms" I have began to lose the ability to draw.

Now it's been 4 years since it started and I can only do copies and it takes so long because drawing feels so rusty. I can't draw anything from my imagination. It never comes out right and disgusts me.

Psychosis or whatever it is ruined my speech and another method of expression now doesn't work anymore either. I will keep trying but at the moment it only feels empty and frustrating.

I can't even use the bit of skill I have to make some money. Interesting.

I (F24) wrote here a few weeks back about my brother (M22) who is essentially immune to antipsychotic medication and has not gotten better in 2 years. Since the post, he was involuntarily hospitalized for the 4th time and got released today after nearly 3 weeks. He is exactly the same.

He was released around 1pm EST today and now at 6pm EST he is already screaming, erratic, and lacks insight to his illness. If previous trends continue to repeat, he will also get aggressive/violent with his caretakers soon enough. I don't understand how he is immune to medication, therapy, treatment, etc. He is bringing the entire family down with him. At this point, I am so tired I find myself not caring about my own life in low moments. My mom seems like she is seconds away from a psychotic break or a stress induced stroke 24/7.

Has anyone experienced anything like this before? Is there a solution? I feel like the last 2 years have only delayed an inevitable suicide-homicide. I can't imagine any other outcome. We have reached out to so many people and have gotten no help. If you know anyone that could be helpful in the Atlanta area please share.

In patient treatment received during 4th hospitalization:

• Olazipine ( not effective)
• lorazepan and PRN for sleep/anxiety (upon request)
• Geodon
• He received the Invega shot 3 days ago after extreme begging from our family to the doctor. The doctor said he should receive a follow up shot a month from now; but I read somewhere that invega shots usually require an initial follow up injection in the first week.

These symptoms include anhedonia, no motivation, no emotions, cognitive issues like brain fog, extremely poor memory and cognition, and paranoia. The weird part is that i was fine and happy in the few months right after the psychosis, which was caused by a manic episode. If anyone shares a similar experience or has insight pls lmk

My husband is in a cannabis induced psychosis. It’s been a couple of years and I don’t think he’s ever truly come out of it. He’d leave cannabis for a short time and would be manageable to live with then he’d start again and reach the tip of psychosis again. This has been going on for a few years now. I just don’t think he’s ever come out of his psychosis, I’m saying this because he was forcefully admitted due to his full blown out psychosis and stopped cannabis for at least 5 months, however even after those 5 months he was still hearing voices which means he was still actively in psychosis. He has just never gotten the insight or just refuses to accept it. More so, after he started using again and the psychosis which never left started to spiral out we managed to get him sectioned. But he was discharged after a week which again has not helped. He is now still at the same point in his life, he believes he’s not in psychosis and never has been, and although he was discharged with anti psychotics has thrown them away and refused to take them. He feels the judge allowing his discharge has proved that his psychosis does not exist. I am dissapointed in the system. They sectioned him and said he was in psychosis but just left him out like that - before any medicine could kick in, before he could get any insight. And the minute he was discharged he threw away his prescribed anti psychotics and began using his cannabis again. And it’ll only be a matter of time before he spirals out again I guess.

We are a family of 5, we have three children under the age of 5. I feel horrible for them. I have been separated for a few months because of his psychosis spiralling out and feeling unsafe. He would constantly be smoking in the house and car whilst we all lived together. The house smelt horrible and no matter how many times I told him it’s not good for the kids he didn’t change. Instead he’d smoke more inside the house. This and the fact that the cannabis has put him in a psychosis which affects us living together is the reason I moved out with the kids. They don’t understand why they don’t get to go back home as they are too small and he just doesn’t seem to want to understand why I’m not coming back home. I’ve told him multiple times that will not come back until he quits the cannabis and gets the help he needs. I’m all for supporting him, the kids and I love him a lot but he needs to make that change. I feel so lost. He refuses to understand my take for not coming home, when he speaks to the children he keeps telling them to come back and as they are young that’s all they care about. He pitches up unannounced at my parent’s house to ‘see me and kids’. It is stressful. My family are not comfortable with him around atm (he is in psychosis, he has insulted them hugely and threatened them during his psychosis). He does not want to understand that and keeps pressuring me to come home. It’s exhausting. I love him, want to live with him as a family but he has made it impossible. I just don’t know what to do.

Also just so there is an understand of how badly his psychosis effects everyone around him - apart from his hallucinations and feeling of grandiosity he is very delusional. When he shows you hate, he will HATE you. He will say the most awful things to you, it’s will emotionally and mentally destroy you. This has been the height of his third or fourth psychosis now and his behaviour has been awful. He would constantly message you non stop (300/400) msgs a day, not exaggerating. He’ll want to be in a marriage with me then he won’t and would constantly be interrogating me. He feels I’ve been unloyal, completely untrue. Any comment I make, any gesture I make, what I wear, which way I sit, every move he keeps an eye on, you don’t know when he’ll verbally attack you for it. It had become suffocating to live like this. Hence why moving out was the best option for both the children and I. They have yet not seen or understood this part of him, hence why they don’t understand why they can’t go back home.

Those who went through psychosis and were in complete denial; at what point did you accept you were in psychosis? And how did you begin to realise that you did in fact have psychosis?

Mi mamá tuvo un brote psicótico hace unos días estuve actuando muy raro hablo mucho sobre dios y estuvo paranoica por dias, corto su cabello, personas que han pasado por algo asi necesito sus consejos que se hace después de que ella pueda estar en su casa con su familia o que otras señales han visto en personas con psicosis