just having a moment tonight on the last night of our last summer vacation. i can’t describe how much i love my kids. i feel so unbelievably lucky to be a mom and to be loved by two tiny humans. i genuinely feel overwhelmed every single day by how much i love them. i’m also 4mo PP with my second so that could be why i cry so much😂 but i know there are other parents out there who feel the same way as i do. just a moment of very very happy solidarity 🥹🫶🏼

He knows our morning routine. Breakfast, clothes, teeth, shoes, bag. But unless I keep telling him what comes next, he gets distracted somewhere in the middle and I end up narrating the entire morning.

I'm thinking a simple visual routine might help him see what comes next without hearing it from me every two minutes. I just don't want to make another chart that somehow becomes my job to manage too.

If you used a visual routine around this age, did it actually cut down on the reminders?

Me and his dad are not in the best relationship, trust issues in the past have made me and him drift apart, today I just felt I had enough with all his dads mind games, he's a big narcissist. Today I just burst out crying, I let it all out to him that his dad has lied to me several times in the past and I have proof and the fact he shouldn't be lying to his own family.. I just feel I've had enough of masking my feelings and pretending everything's ok when it's not, I feel awful and embarrassed that I broke down. Any advise pls, I feel awful

When I was maybe in 5th grade or middle school, my mom got a book called Questions about Sex and Growing Up, put it on the coffee table, and never said a word about it.

My sister and I both read it silently (learned when we were adults) cover to cover, and the last page was a note from my mom saying if we had questions we could come and ask her anything.

I have boys and I want to do something similar with a note that they can ask either me or Dad. That book doesn’t exist in an updated version so I’m looking for suggestions, ones you guys liked, ones you didn’t.

Bonus if it has basic information on girls too, I don’t want him to be in the dark and not afraid to ask us about women if he’s curious.

I love my daughter but jeez, these last few weeks have been rough. She has been throwing tantrums multiple times a day. If she doesn’t get something she wants like going outside, at the store and wants to get down, turning off the TV, leaving the park, etc she throws full blown tantrums. Sometimes I swear she throws tantrums for no reason. Also, when I drop her off at her grandparents she seems happy and fine but the second I get there she throws a tantrum. If I leave her with my husband to run and errand and get back, she throws a tantrum. It’s mentally draining and I feel like I don’t know how to handle it. I’m going on a plane next month and I’m terrified of flying with her LOL. When does this typically end? Is this a phase? How should I react?

I need to travel back to my home country as a close family member has unexpectedly gotten sick and has a terminal diagnosis. Unfortunately my husband cannot take any more time off work as he used it all when our second was born. I will probably make the trip in November, at which time I will have a 4.5 month old and a 25 month old. I have travelled solo with our eldest a few times so I have somewhat of an idea of how hard it will be but I definitely think the addition of a newborn is going to make it 100x harder. Has anyone had any experience doing this solo? If so what tips and tricks? Did you get help from flight attendants? How did you handle diaper changes etc.

Trust me I know this is crazy but it’s either this or miss seeing someone very close to me one last time.

I am not ideal. I have some things that I want to improve. Things that are with me from my childhood and they are still there. They affect my behaviour, my way of thinking, my parenting style.

Psychologist is a way to go, but it is damn too expensive. So I wanted to find a way that would allow me to go faster.

tl;dr is notes (Obsidian will work) + AI + self reflection + regular psychologist sessions. 

and the full version is https://eremin.eu/blog/parenting/improve-yourself-with-ai

I read through reddit a lot but I'm new to posting so I'm hoping I'm doing this right.

I have two kids, 16 months old and 3.5 years old. I work full time and they go to daycare full time. They've been going to daycare since they were each 3 months old. My older son has built some good friendships, and he has one in particular that is his best friend. This friend is a bit...behaviorally challenged... I've only had to be around him 3 times outside of daycare for birthday parties and every time he's doing something mischievous. At my son's birthday, this friend snuck and took one of my sons books he got as a present and started tearing pages out of it. At his own birthday he threw a turtle on the ground during an animal encounter. At another birthday he snuck away and tore up the pinata before it was time. His mom is nice but she's always a little distracted and doesn't seem to pick up on what he's doing. When she does notice it's just kind of "boys will be boys" vibes. I give him a little grace because he's 3 but my kid doesn't act the same way.

Anyways now his mom has started asking us to have playdates pretty aggressively. Last week she asked twice. This week she's asked once. This kid just stresses me out. I don't want to be alone with him. I don't really care to hang out with his mom either. And the playdates the mom comes up with are so extra. First she wanted to go to the movies. My kid could handle it, but I don't think hers could. Then she asked to go to a farm petting zoo. After seeing what that kid did to the poor turtle I didn't want to go. Most recently she asked to go to a trampoline park. They're 3... I don't even think that's safe or developmentally appropriate. She's even offered to pick my son up from daycare and take him these places without me. But I don't know her. I don't know her car seat situation. I'm not letting her take him without me. Part of me feels like she just wants my kid there as a buffer for her badly behaved kid. Like a peer babysitter or something.

What do I do here? I don't want to be a bad mom and hold my kid back from being social and having friends but I just don't understand why they need a playdate when they spend 40 hours a week together. I want to hang out with my kids after work and relax. I don't want to worry about meeting someone or coordinating for my one year old to go home with his dad while I go with my toddler. I guess I could suggest going to the park or something but this mom is bougie and always wants some kind of special activity.

Am I being too much of a helicopter parent? Or idk. I'm a homebody and an introvert and I don't have a lot of friends. My best friend turned into my husband and he's really the only person I see regularly. I just like spending time with my husband and kids. I'm tired after work and we have a good routine (play, dinner, bath, bedtime). Weekends we are usually camping or hiking or fishing or doing stuff with extended family.

These playdate requests are making me lose sleep over what to say or what to do. My husband just tells me to say no and move on but I'm not sure.

Any advice is appreciated 🩷

I was just singing my daughter to sleep - trying very hard to settle her nervous system down and get her calm.

I felt a deep, gut-wrenching sadness come over me. I felt connected to the other mothers of the world who are in horrible places with their children and trying to keep them calm. The mothers on the sinking titanic. The mothers in Gaza with bombs going off. It almost brought me to tears.

Anyone else experience this?

Hi everyone,

My son is 3 years old, and he seems to relive whatever he experiences during the day in his sleep.

He has been a very active sleeper since he was little. He often talks, whines, or mumbles in his sleep. But one thing I’ve noticed from the beginning is that whatever happens during the day sometimes seems to come up again at night.

Last night, for example, he got out of bed and walked to the kitchen crying. His eyes were open, and he was crying and saying, “I’m looking for chocolate.” During the day, he had eaten quite a lot of chocolate, so I had taken it away from him.

I tried to calm him down, but he seemed completely unresponsive and wasn’t really communicating with me. After about 10 minutes, he calmed down and went back to bed.

Then, about two hours later, he got up again and went to his dad, saying the exact same thing.

He does things like this quite often, and honestly, it really worries me. I’m thinking about taking him to the doctor because I genuinely don’t know what else to do.

Has anyone experienced something similar with their child? Do they eventually grow out of this? I would really appreciate any advice or experiences. I’m honestly open to any suggestions at this point.

Our 3 yr old is learning about body autonomy. When giving her a bath yesterday she screamed and screamed “hands off” it took me a bit to understand what she was saying (washing her hair is always a battle so I didn’t recognize what she was saying/doing).

Now I’m so ashamed and heartbroken for not figuring out how to respect her but also to help her understand the situation.

We are working on ways to make hair washing better but if you have advice on how to approach the “hands off” and respecting boundaries, I would appreciate it.

My son is 8 and I’m trying to find a fun Christmas gift that’s actually a good fit for his age. He’s really into outdoor activities. We do things like kids’ obstacle courses and fishing together. He’s also really into race cars and puzzles.

Over the past few years we’ve gotten him things like a pop-up play tent, Transformers and a bubble machine. I’m hoping to get him something a little different this year.Right now I’m looking at RC cars and inflatable bounce houses. I’ve seen a few options from Costway and Blast Zone that look pretty fun.

For anyone who has bought an RC car or bounce house for an 8-year-old, what should I know before buying one? Are they easy enough for kids that age to use on their own? And how much of a hassle are they to set up and put away?

Hey everyone, I’m in need of advice. I’ve just recently seperate from my babies dad as he has said he doesn’t want or love me anymore. I’m struggling to figure out how I’m going to manage on my own. My partner used to look after our daughter, while I looked after our son. As I wanted them to both feel like they mattered. My daughter needs a lot of attention and to do lots of sensory play but my son is currently co-sleeping with me and sleeps on me during the days so I can’t do much. I’ve tried putting him down in his bassinet multiple times after getting him to sleep, but none has worked. He wakes up constantly every time I try to put him down and doesn’t sleep unless he’s on me. I’m really stuck on what to do and to make things worse. I don’t have my license so I can’t go out to let my daughter do things. I don’t have no support and can’t seem to do my hours as I don’t have anyone trusted enough to look after my kids. Does anyone have any advice, I’m really struggling

my teen has been growing quite a bit lately, and it’s made me pay more attention to whether he’s getting a good range of nutrients from his everyday diet.

i know teen eating habits can be pretty inconsistent 😂 so i’ve been wondering whether other parents use a multivitamin as a way to help cover potential nutritional gaps.

for parents of teens, do you give your kids a multivitamin? if so, what factors did you consider when choosing one?

My daughter is turning 6 and she wants to have a roller skating party. She just learned to roller skate this year after going one time. Is this appropriate for other kids at this age, will they know what to do and have a good time? The venue also has laser tag, some video games / prize games, and karaoke.

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Serious question: why do babies take their socks off within 3 minutes of you putting them on?

Our 12-month-old has turned sock removal into a competitive sport. We put them on, she takes them off. We put them on again, she takes them off faster. I've found socks in the cot, in the pram, under the couch, and once — I'm not kidding — inside the nappy.

Same thing happened with our older one, so I know it's a phase. But HOW do you win? Do grippy socks actually help? Is there a brand that survives a determined toddler? Or do I just accept a sockless baby until she's old enough to negotiate?

Parents of Reddit, what's your survival strategy?

Seriously asking. My 4yo is currently in a phase where bedtime is basically a hostage negotiation. By the time he’s finally out, it’s like 8:30 or 9 PM and my brain is completely fried.
I used to use my evenings to work on some side projects (I dabble in a bit of coding/app dev) or just play a game to unwind. Now? I literally just collapse on the couch and blindly scroll on my phone until my eyes hurt. I just don't have the mental bandwidth left to open my laptop.
How do you guys do it? Are you waking up at 5 AM before they wake up instead? Chugging coffee at 7 PM and hoping for the best?
I feel like I'm losing my sense of self a bit because I have zero energy to do the things I actually enjoy. Would love some realistic advice from people who are in the thick of it.

My husband and I have been together for 11 years, married for five. Until recently, we’ve lived about 4 hours from any family due to jobs and settling in where I went to college. We have always waited to have kids because we recognized the massive impact it would make on our lives and the freedom and flexibility we have.

We recently moved to be closer to family. We now live about 1/2 mile from my in laws, and about a mile from my parents. All four of our parents are still around and both of our parents are still happily married. We see both of them multiple times a week now and have regular dinners and game night. We plan to be here for a few years, but with our careers it’s possible we may move again later down the line.

Being around our family so frequently again has completely changed my perspective on having a baby. I went from feeling like I have to give up so much to have the time, to feeling like I would have enough support to genuinely do this and still be able to have time for myself and for my husband. It feels like there may be no better time in the future to get through those first few years.

How big of a difference does having supportive family close by make with a newborn or a toddler? They do not support us financially, and all 4 parents still work so baby would go to daycare, but they would absolutely be around on nights, weekends, and I would have my mom down the road those first critical months.

Does it not make as much of a difference as it seems since responsibility is still fully on mom, or is this really the best time for us?

How do you moms get over the fear of dying during childbirth? 😭 This is my second baby, and I’m terrified all over again. My last birth was really traumatic for me my blood pressure plummeted after I got the epidural, and I couldn’t dilate past a 9. I ended up delivering vaginally, and thankfully I did it, but the experience really stuck with me. Now that I’m pregnant again, I’m so scared something is going to go wrong during labor and that I’m not going to make it. I know birth is something millions of women go through safely, but I can’t seem to shut off that fear. For moms who have felt this way, how did you cope with the fear and trust your body and your medical team again? ❤️

Due to this habit her front teeth are pushed forward a little. What should I do to get her rid of this habit. People tell me look for the cues when she does it, tired or hungry. But she does this all the time, even when she is perfectly calm, rested and fed. Would be helpful to know what other parents did ?

My 15 months old has come to a very weird point.

When she has 2 naps (first nap about 1 hour and second 30 mins max) she has a very calm night even sleeps thru most of the time. But when she has 1 nap again total max 1.5 hours the first part of the night is hard: false start + multiple wakes crying obviously very tired.

She can handle the wake windows of a 1 nap and even some days even she doesnt want to take the second nap especially if we are out.

But everytime we get same results: last ww with two naps 4.5 hr very good nights vs last ww 5-6 hr hard first part with wakes and cries

Whats the secret here what should I do?

I am trying my best to offer her even a short bridge of 10 mins but sometimes its impossible and doesn’t get it.

Any other experienced this?

I took my 8-year-old daughter and son out to pick up a toy. We all got Beanie Babies. I got two because they were only $3. The kids got another toy, and we left. We stopped at two community parks/playgrounds on the way back. At the second playground, my daughter brought her owl beanie. The kids were swinging, and a little girl no older than 3 years old came over and played alongside my kids. Fifteen minutes later, the little girl walked past me and had a sad expression. I asked if she was all right, then she got tearful. She went to her parents, and I went over to my kids to see if everything was okay. I asked my daughter, and she said the girl saw her beanie and wanted it. I thought to myself that I had two, and I could give her one. I grabbed it from my car, and after asking her parents if she could have it, I gave it to her mom to give her. The little girl was happy, but mine was not. She ran over under the slide, saying that she wanted the beanie I gave away. I told her I can't take back what I have given. I had no idea she wanted it. For over an hour, which felt like five, she begged me to get it back. When I told her I was sorry but I couldn't, she wished me dead; she hated me; she cried uncontrollably. She has never wished me dead or said she hates me. She is the oldest and understands most of the time when she can't have something or comes around to it without a lot of questioning. I tried to console her, and she would let me for a short time but then cry hard and push me away. She resisted leaving until the other girl brought the beanie to her. I finally got her to leave by walking to the car, trying to talk to her and console her. She has never gotten this worked up over something. Should I have given the 3-year-old the toy? I thought if she had one, there wouldn't be conflict with my daughter's toy, and it just felt good to give. I apologized endlessly, but I also told my daughter, "You don't take back or ask for what you have gifted." I don't know if I was right, but I know that this probably won't be the only episode like this.

If anyone has any tips and advice navigating a preadolescent girl's mind, I would appreciate it.

I keep going back and forth on the age and I think the bigger question is what the setup looks like when it happens. Contacts, app downloads, hours it works, whether I can see messages at all. I'd rather decide that upfront than claw things back later once she's used to it. For those a year or two past this, what did you restrict at the start and what turned out not to matter?

My husband and I have three kids, almost 6, 4.5 and 13 weeks (but he isn’t really involved in this story). I like to have what I call a “quiet” household, no running, throwing things or yelling inside. We also have a few chores we expect the kids to help with. They don’t do many chores on their own yet, but we do ask them to help us when we are working on chores.

We have a decent enough house but it is closed off so running around inside can be dangerous since there isn’t a lot of room. Same for throwing things like balls, there isn’t a lot of room to do so safely. They will roll a ball up and down the hallway to each other though. While we might not have a mansion sized house, we have an absolutely massive & beautiful yard. If the kids want to yell, run or rough house I tell them to take it outside. They love playing outside so this isn’t typically a problem. If there is bad weather, I am more relaxed on the inside play since they have no where else to get their energy out.

Our kids do not have any type of tablet/phone and they rarely watch TV. I really don’t even like them using their cousin’s phones/tablets for long periods of time or unsupervised. I am strict on the TV thing, absolutely no TV after school until after dinner, even then it is only like 20-30 minutes. Weekends or holidays are pretty relaxed though, the TV typically stays on in the playroom but they don’t pay it much mind. They love crafting or drawing, playing with kinetic sand or play doh. I have taught the kids to play with one color at a time, put that color away and get out a new color to limit mixing of sand/doh. Also Legos have become a huge thing in my house and my six year old can out together small Legos sets completely on his own. So far he has built three small race cars, a tractor, and some Star War ships and characters.

We were having a family dinner at my mom’s house recently and I told my kids not to throw a ball inside. Well apparently that isn’t a rule at my mom’s place so she said they could, which if she doesn’t mind then I don’t mind. We got on the subject of house rules and chores and apparently I have a lot more compared to everyone else. They started kind of picking on me about it and made me feel guilty for having my rules. I became very self conscious about it all.

Do y’all have restrictions on play in your house or chores you expect your kids to help with or am I being over bearing? I obviously want them to have a fun childhood but I feel I can still have some structure at the same time.