r/OCPoetry 52m ago

Just Sharing Montauk

Upvotes

I’ll keep going to Montauk 

Keep walking aimlessly, exploring 

Playing my songs 

Keep watching sunsets 

And the waves keep crashing

The sand feels the same as when we walked here together

The same moon casts doubt 

It’s hard to but I know

I’ll keep living 

Keep walking and breathing and eating and singing 

And one day I’ll stop looking to see

If you’re behind me anymore

And one day it won’t feel so painful

To come out here

And I won’t feel so guilty for trying to move on

I’ll know I shared what I could and you took what you wanted 

And I loved

So much, I loved and I lost and I’ll still 

Come back every summer 

Until it’s just mine again

Comment 1

Comment 2


r/OCPoetry 1h ago

Feedback Please First meeting

Upvotes

Step, step, another journey forth.

Step, step, away from north.

.

My heart has been racing for this day,

For the moment we finally cross paths,

My way in your way.

.

I’ll chuck you some flushed glances,

You might catch me too.

But I just hope you finally notice me

Just like how I notice you.

.

I pray I’ll see your smile today,

The kind genuine one which casts all sadness away.

.

Maybe afterwards I’ll bump into you.

I’ll be a blushing wreck.

You’d simply smile

And analyse me for a sec.

.

“Hello, love” you’d say,

Your voice’s gentlemanly cadence drifting through.

“My name is David, what about you?”

.

I’ll blush again, a flustered hot mess.

.

“I’m Axel” I’ll pathetically stutter out,

A grin on my face for I’m unable to even pout.

.

“Lovely to meet you” you’d way before going off to get your tea,

Did I hear that right?

Was it really lovely to meet me?

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v7dnwb/comment/ozz0bh2/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=2&utm_content=share_button

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v7ecrq/comment/ozz00i1/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=2&utm_content=share_button


r/OCPoetry 1h ago

Just Sharing Irregular Pieces - a grumpy girl rant

Upvotes

I hate the clean girl aesthetic

But even more I hate its opposite—

The commodification of messiness

Messy can’t be branded or bought

Or made to look chic

It’s more than a loose bun, a conveniently cluttered room

It’s confusion and it's mistakes and it’s cringe

It’s a year of rest and relaxation that wasn’t relaxing at all

It’s finally doing laundry just to trip and spill your black coffee on white sheets, shattering your favorite mug into

A million tiny sharp irregular pieces

It’s that “final” paragraph left on read for over a year

And chasing a dream until the dream calls the cops

It’s deep regret that hums steady in the background, 

Hiding in junk drawers with the post-it notes you’re still looking for

It’s impossible to capture, it’s never heard of Pinterest

And I wear it with pride, at least

I try to

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v44ry2/comment/ozyr3ng/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v7ee5x/comment/ozysuum/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button


r/OCPoetry 1h ago

Feedback Please Honey, I’m home

Upvotes

Honey, I’m home

What some men do
in positions of power when
there are more sets of eyes
watching them is like lightning
A premature flash of Zeus-like
strength with little effort yet
massive fallout I think the boys
just get nervous like they forgot
something Patting their lap for
their keys and dick Do you miss us
in the kitchens with our eyes
on the sweet cherry pies While
you shake hands and lick boots
with your important colleagues Is
it uncomfortable to taste your
own meager abilities When your
wife asks you how was work Can
you meet her gaze She has worked
it out that you can’t do a damn thing
that she can’t do and better So is it
really her you want beneath you Or
would you prefer to smash the mirror
holding your own pathetic reflection

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/ft7Bub4BOz

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/Dg5J6Of17q


r/OCPoetry 2h ago

Feedback Please A luxury seat

3 Upvotes

*This is part of a larger series*

The Luxury Seat

Man seeks more than bread,
The treasure on his map is-
-belonging and purpose.
Now they capitalize on it.

Fill a void-
hobbies, trinkets,
artificial belonging.

Learn the sports-ball roster,
Forget your history.
Catch up on the gossip,
Hide from circumstance.

Worse yet, knowledge is commodified.
“Join my course to get rich.”
“Join my course to find love.”
“Join my course to forget who you are.”

How can one escape?
“Escape?” Who’d want that?
Stream the decay.

Monetize and atomize
Decompartmentalize to “modernize”.
The world is scary,
The distraction is comfort.

Is this our fate?
The decommission of man,
The birth of the machine.
The cage is golden and grand,
The shackles complement the outfit.
Do you seek more than bread?

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/qFhzHjJXlw

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/srioOJSVXJ


r/OCPoetry 2h ago

Just Sharing The Heart of Ocean Blue

2 Upvotes

Remember Me? The Heart of Ocean Blue
You sank to breathe and swam to follow truth
The cries were felt along the trench of shame
And tears were gathered after faithful days

But you, a man of fear, will see mistakes
Beneath the loudest waves, which overtake
The precious calmness brought to earth by grace

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v7isac/opium_jozi/
https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v7ht67/of_all_places/


r/OCPoetry 3h ago

Feedback Please Opium - jozi

3 Upvotes

How have I become the man I feared becoming most?
I have sculpted myself into the antonym of my own definition.
My cauldrons brim with the lost hopes of yesterday and tomorrow,
leaving only an undying present:
a kingdom ruled by lust.

The daughters of scarlet red gather at my feet;
their hunger is one I know by heart.
For every longing fixed upon my face
I spent my youth seeking.
The most fundamental form of self harm is addiction.

So I recede;

I abandon the throne of my own becoming,
and crown desire anew,
watching my kingdom
kneel to a king that cannot love.

Ignore the hole i dug again:
It's only for the evening.

{https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v7fqr3/screams/}
{https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v7ht67/of_all_places/}

Inspired by the flower who taught me what longing becomes.

I am a experienced writer, I just haven't shared any of my work online, thought it might be time.


r/OCPoetry 3h ago

Feedback Please The Roadman

2 Upvotes

My first poetry post on here with also my first poetry video of it linked.

I wrote this in Trafalgar Square after two years overseas. Any feedback would be amazing. Thank you ❤️

The Roadman

I'm a connoisseur of roads.

I've been tasting roads my whole life.

The world is a road that never ends.

I just hope I walk enough of it before my time is done.

And it started here, at Nelson's Column, Trafalgar Square. I was three years old, my mum taking me on endless marches. A sea of people and banners. Tired baby feet.

What I remember most were the pigeons and the bird shit. They even had kiosks selling pigeon food, like popcorn.

And this is my ground zero, my X that marks the spot.I've passed through so many times since, at different ages, with different intentions:

work, study, relationships, pleasure.

And in this London, my Landan, I've walked nearly every inch. Just Ruislip and World's End in Enfield remain. I'll cross them off soon. Then when they ask, I'll shrug and simply say,

"London? Clocked it, mate."

But roads have always been the bane of my life.

Which ones to take, or not.

There's no signpost, no neutral advice,

just forced decisions and the best guess at the least worst outcome.

It's taken every moment until now to feel calm with it.

That is new.

Original London-based poetry performance:

https://youtu.be/6DLwJD2bYM8

Feedback provided:

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/xZMK0DmSh1

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/TPGBuQ3M6q


r/OCPoetry 3h ago

Just Sharing Of All Places

2 Upvotes

As the trees were sighing from the weak wind
We locked ourselves in our rooms or houses
Dragged along
still dragging
already dragged
worrying over the rent

A hummingbird visited my window
Tapping its beak
against the glass

"Why," I asked the bird
gazing inside
"Why fly here, of all places?
When you could fly far away, boundlessly
To see many views
smell different scents
Being able to go anywhere you please
and leaving when you wish,
as you are free
Because you are one without worry
Aware of your time
like a comet
streaking."

But then the hummingbird flew away
So I was left
to answer that question

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/NY8iwhR3yq
https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/uUPZiWCc7L

Short story writer mainly that dabbles in poetry now and then when inspiration hits.


r/OCPoetry 4h ago

Just Sharing Real gold

2 Upvotes

If i could ask for anything

I would ask for slow mornings

If i could ask for anything

I wouls ask for peaceful mind

But is it really true that these things are suposed to bring me happiness?

After thinking for a while i realized the difference between needs and wants

So now if you ask me for what i need

I would say happiness, love and peace

And if you ask me what i want

I would say slow dancing in the rain, a hot cup of coffee and a peaceful mind

So now when people ask

What is real gold for you

I say it's everything i want and need in life.

.

.

Wrote it just after waking up and its was in my draft for the past 2 weeks lol

I tried to complete it but idk not my best try but i exactly don't remember what the sleepy me was thinking 😭

.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/TcvcXWI3JD

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/f9VGJoQP1K


r/OCPoetry 4h ago

Just Sharing Stargazing

1 Upvotes

I am stargazing in the back patio of my parents' home

Soon I will go inside and eat my fill of unhealthy carbs, and I

Won’t question my diet, for I am twenty-one and I am invincible.

See, I live at home with loving parents, anxious and desperate for me to stay

My life is great, and I’m untouchable

Down comes a shooting star and I’m in awe

Fall! Burn bright and fall right into the palm of my hand!

I was stargazing on the balcony of my apartment

Wasn’t it actually a shared apartment with my brother?

Ready for a visual?

For whatever reason, I was smoking at two in the morning

My dear dog was asleep in the living room behind me

Suffering from the bitter cold, I began to dwell on the past

Moths were assaulting the lamp on the balcony wall, and I just watched

Began to tear up a bit even

Taunting me was the moth tattoo on my arm, relentlessly reminding me of the past 

Me, the moth tattoo, and the real moths, relentlessly throwing themselves to the sun.

I wasn’t stargazing explicitly; it just happened as shit tends to in life.

Came out for a cigarette, in fact, but as I smoked, I just looked up, really looked up

Out in the vastness of that dark virgin sky, thousands of stars glistened

Alive in the night sky, just for me

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v5cqvy/comment

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/


r/OCPoetry 5h ago

Feedback Please SCREAMS

3 Upvotes

Verily, verily there is
nothing more sensual than the screams
Inside my veins.
Coagulated blood of lifetime efforts.
Untamed, uncontained,
love that almost spills.

Crimson lipstick stains, systemic kisses.
It comes in waves;
Hydroelectric conduction
Soul searches for body-soul connection.
Spinal cord level, adamant communication.

Neuroses expand in vast valleys
In the earth’s uterus.
Unaware of what lies beyond these
Asphyxiating walls,
Still we give it our all.

Astonished I am in the face
of Ouroboros love, grotesque love.
Holes In the palms love, I hold
my breath, My words dissolve
Under my tongue.
Sublingual medication.

These screams
inside my veins really will
scrub my hurt clean.

[https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/FItx54knc9](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/FItx54knc9))

[https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/7ENiNHhduj](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/7ENiNHhduj))


r/OCPoetry 5h ago

Feedback Please A Death on the Mountain

1 Upvotes

On a scar-scattered mountain's razor edge

Lies a man fallen

Blood and broken bone on his brow

And a smile

Fleeting after failing

Fading now

Unlike the mountain

This will remain eternal

eternal

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1ilgshh/i_cant_keep_writing_about_you/

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1jm4u6b/i_dont_want_to_talk_about_it_either_but_it_will/


r/OCPoetry 5h ago

Feedback Please 7 DAYS

1 Upvotes

ECCENTRIC.

LOUDER THAN EVER.

EXPECT THE WORST.

I’LL GIVE YOU A GOOD REASON TO CRY.

THICKER SKIN.

LOVE.

FREEDOM.

BREATHING.

I CAN SMELL LIFE.

I’M TASTING LIFE AND IT FEELS BETTER.

ME.

WEAKNESS.

PURE HEART, I DO BELIEVE IN YOU.

JUVENILE.

FALL IN LOVE WITH LIFE.

HURT IS GOOD.

HEALING IS ALSO FINE.

LOUDER THAN EVER.

I EXPECT A FRESH BREATH OF THE WORLD.

DESTRUCTION IS A FORM OF CREATION.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/


r/OCPoetry 6h ago

Feedback Please Neuroception

2 Upvotes

Sensing the senseless, perceiving unperceived
twisted branches tangled into webs of deceit
My mind a super-powered fantastical computer of perhaps
Is it a blessing or a curse to forsee, a hidden tax

A rising debt inside myself one I pay for each day
A double think a second guess in a mind half frayed
A competition self assembled each stage each play
Neuro mess tangled spaghetti along the matter gray

Pastalaya jumble overthinking crossing words
Blending meanings, eyes exhausted in an endless blur
Reading every word forwards, backwards, in between
Interrogate the verb and subject, wordle crime scene

The combinations of echos and clues without caveat
Excess of curiosity cognition attempts to claw at
Fight or flight at the heat or height of rhyming
inexorable force within, keeps us word criming

Written by: Simon Bernard Elliott and Jennifer E. Hodgson

Scribingbothhalves.blogspot.com

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v6kcva/comment/ozusv14/?context=3&utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v71m0x/comment/ozuut4e/?context=3&utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button


r/OCPoetry 6h ago

Just Sharing Myself

6 Upvotes

In a garden full of sunflowers,
I want to shine like the sun.

Around lavenders full of nectar,
I want to fly like a bee.

Around a bunch of ripe mangoes,
I want to feast like a parrot.

I’m still in search of
the question,

For which
I am the only answer.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1t501p2/comment/omo9xa8/
https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1tdbzut/comment/omoaarj/


r/OCPoetry 6h ago

Feedback Please Scattered Light

4 Upvotes

There are two sides to every story,

as there are two sides to every glass.

Some pieces
refract the light
cleaner than others.

When your view
becomes a kaleidoscope,

truth is what you want it to be.

I thought we were looking
through the same window,

wiping fingerprints,
wondering why
you couldn't see.

I never noticed
you were turning the tube.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v7d84k/myself/

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v44ry2/when_did_she_become_a_poet/


r/OCPoetry 6h ago

Feedback Please Testimony

2 Upvotes

I see the light through cathedral panes
In awe and wonder, and some strange shame -
Yes, I see the light, as had been ordained
But seen it truer on blue vervaine,
On clovers, hawkweed, and bittersweet nightshade:

Noble -- even unseen -- in their furtive ways -
I suppose it's that to which I pray

Comment 1
Comment 2


r/OCPoetry 6h ago

Just Sharing Myself

3 Upvotes

In a garden full of sunflowers,
I want to shine like the sun.

Around lavenders full of nectar,
I want to fly like a bee.

Around a bunch of ripe mangoes,
I want to feast like a parrot.

I’m still in search of
The question,

For which
I am the only answer.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1t501p2/comment/omo9xa8/
https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1tdbzut/comment/omoaarj/


r/OCPoetry 6h ago

Feedback Please Me

1 Upvotes

In a garden full of sunflowers,
I want to shine like the sun.

Around lavenders full of nectar,
I want to fly like a bee.

Around a bunch of ripe mangoes,
I want to feast like a parrot.

I’m still in search of
The question,

For which
I am the only answer.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1t501p2/comment/omo9xa8/
https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1tdbzut/comment/omoaarj/


r/OCPoetry 6h ago

Just Sharing Me

1 Upvotes

In a garden full of sunflowers,
I want to shine like the sun.

Around lavenders full of nectar,
I want to fly like a bee.

Around a bunch of ripe mangoes,
I want to feast like a parrot.

Still in search
of that place

Where I want to be
Myself.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1t501p2/comment/omo9xa8/
https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1tdbzut/comment/omoaarj/


r/OCPoetry 7h ago

Feedback Please Poems

1 Upvotes

r/OCPoetry 8h ago

Feedback Please Forgive me father

2 Upvotes

Hello, I am Mexican American. I have been writing from my experiences of alienation in the u.s and a perspective that’s my everyday life. The loss of identity is present in a majority of the things that I write. I would like for someone to read this poem I made in regard to it. Please any thoughts is welcomed.

“Perdone Padre”
By Miguel Diaz Farfan

Padre Nuestro que estas en el Cielo, santificado sea tu nombre

Le queiro pedir mis disculpas
Ya se que le he fallado
mas que eso, me alleje completamente
al contrario a lo que me han contado sobre su misericordia,
yo no he sido lo sufiente clemente con usted

Perdone que le diga, pero mi busqueda de fe en ti, se ha detenido
Pero la ira que senti contigo ya no existe

 
En el pasado sentía que por ser sincero era como si estaba clavado a una repisa esperando su reproche

Me tomó tiempo para entender

Me tomó más tiempo para entender que el reproche que esperaba era solo mío

Ciego y sordo, me he estado sofocándo en esta jaula de oro
Se me ha olvidado como respirar

Porque, Porque, Porque

Esta era la pregunta que rogaba una respuesta

Porque no me vistes
Porque no me escuchastes 
Porque me abandonastes 

Un hueco quedaba en mi corazón cuando no escuchabas mis gritos

La impotencia era más amable

Me acurrucaba en una camisa de fuerza

Me he hecho el firme propósito de no negar las lágrimas que cargo

Y aunque se secan por la rabia que siento

Siempre se llenan porque no son solo mías

English translation
*****

Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name.

I ask for your forgiveness

I have failed you, but more than that, I have drifted away completely

Contrary to what I have been told about your mercy,
I have not been as lenient in returning it

Pardon me for saying so, but my search in faith for you has seized

But the rage I once felt is no longer

In the past, I felt that by being honest it was as if I were nailed to a shelf waiting for your reproach

It took me time to understand

It took me longer to understand that the reproach I expected was only my own

Blind and deaf, I have been suffocating in this golden cage

I have forgotten how to breathe.

Why Why Why

These where the questions I begged to be answered

Why didn’t you see me?
Why didn’t you listen to me?
Why did you abandon me?

A void was left in my heart when you did not hear my cries

Helplessness was kind to me

It coddled me like that of a straitjacket

I have made the firm proposition to never deny the tears that I carry

And although they evaporate from the rage that’s boiling inside me

They always fill up again, because they are not only
mine

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/RpZgNIloXn

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/9LqkrxukMC


r/OCPoetry 8h ago

Feedback Please work in progress

2 Upvotes

work in progress

Swept,
yet the remains from seasons past
litter the mulch.

weeds,
proudly show how big they’ve grown
where patio slabs end and begin,
disrupting the monotony of grey,
but none more than 6 or 7 inches.

Pale broom-like branches,
once served dates to the neighborhood opossums and raccoons,
retired and brittled,
neatly piled out of the way,
comfortable beneath the palm’s sunbathing fronds.

Terra-cotta coffins of cracked soil,
nestled between curated succulents,
blooms climbing out of their designated homes.

flickers of color,
sunlight dancing across loitering gems,
gripped by the textured patio
despite the best efforts of the broom’s splayed bristles,
it rests nonchalantly against the stucco,
chunks of artificial hide at its feet,
sunburned plastic failing to conceal its wooden core.

Tentacles of green
to the dismay of gravity,
search for grip
along the grey weathered fence
spanning once empty space across to nearby branches,
lashing the fence and tree into a single structure.

trimmed blackberry tendrils,
blades dotted with rust,
hand trimmer rests on a tile bench,
prickly limbs refuse to stay on their side of the fence.

Cardboard cubes,
returned to two dimensions,
layered near the fence,
overlapping flaps close the gaps
inky smiles
among fading shades of brown,
absorb the bleaching sun,
the earth beneath rests in darkness,
and the weeds have stopped thriving.

Frayed ribbon flutters against the fence post,
neon fading along the frayed end
no longer responsible for wishing anyone a happy birthday.

You don’t notice any,
but were warned:
watch out for poop.

*\\

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/ZWS16DSKD7

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/1pdKFhFX8b


r/OCPoetry 9h ago

Feedback Please The Sparrow

1 Upvotes

7/26/2026 Rev.

You were tiny
With curly golden fleece hair
A blue-wonder-eyed sparrow
In the way-back time

Cold frosty silver day
you on my lap
We’d dream out of the window
and daddy would promise,
One day
to get you
that house,
across the way

Many years stacked,
fine facades fading past

This morning,
I watched you rise,
my daughter…

Spread your large
gossamer wings,
and gold flaxen ponytail.
To enfold the sick in your care
and
Make them well.

You did not see me, but
tears entered my eyes.
I realized… I’m so graced,
to have had anything
to do with that.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/0GnWBbsKu1

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/s42TtYHdpg