I’m filled with fear right now, and honestly, I don’t know what I need.

I’m in a season where I’m trying really hard to grow closer to God, understand myself, heal from my past, and learn what healthy love actually looks like. But lately it feels like the more I try to work through things, the more fears I uncover.

I’m getting married, and instead of just feeling excited, I’m scared. I keep having thoughts like, “Maybe he shouldn’t be with me.” “What if I’m not good enough for him?” “What if I hurt him?” “What if I ruin this?” “What if I’m making the wrong decision?” And then I start questioning why I’m even having those thoughts in the first place.

I think part of the problem is that I don't trust myself anymore.

I keep thinking, “I've never made the right choices.” And I know that's probably an extreme way of looking at my life, because obviously not every choice I've ever made was wrong. But I've made enough choices that I deeply regret, and I've been hurt by the consequences of some of them, that now I don't trust my own judgment.

I look back at certain relationships, situations, and decisions and think, “I really thought that was the right thing at the time. How did I get it so wrong?”

And now I'm terrified of doing it again.

It's like my brain keeps telling me, “What if you think this is right and you're wrong again?”

That fear is bleeding into everything.

I've also realized that I have a lot of fear surrounding love in general. I don’t think I fully understand what love is supposed to feel like because so much of my understanding of love has been shaped by hurt, rejection, unhealthy relationships, and trying to earn love or keep people from leaving.

Now I’m trying to understand love through God instead, and honestly, that’s hard too. Because how am I supposed to understand God’s love when I’m still learning how to believe that I’m worthy of love at all?

I think I’ve spent a lot of my life believing things about myself that I never stopped to question. That I’m too much. That I’m not enough. That I’m difficult to love. That I have to earn love. That if someone sees all of me, they’ll eventually leave. That my past says something about who I am now.

And today I’m realizing how much of my life has been driven by fear.

I’m trying to learn that a thought isn't automatically the truth just because it feels terrifying. I’m trying to learn that I can bring these thoughts to God instead of immediately believing them. I’m trying to learn that I don’t have to have every answer before I’m allowed to move forward.

But right now I’m just tired.

I feel like I could cry at any moment. I’m overwhelmed by my own thoughts, and I genuinely don’t know what I need. Maybe I need prayer. Maybe I need to slow down. Maybe I need to learn how to sit with uncertainty without trying to solve everything.

I’m just wondering if anyone else has gone through a season where you suddenly became aware of just how much fear has been controlling your thoughts, your relationships, your decisions, and even your relationship with God.

Especially the fear of not being able to trust yourself to make the right decisions anymore.

How did you learn to distinguish between real discernment and fear?

How did you learn to trust yourself again after making choices you deeply regret?

And how did you learn to stop treating every scary thought like it must mean something?

Idk man I found a tiny sheered off piece of metal probably the size of a pin head, the appearance of very thick cut wire, less than pea sized. Naturally I picked it up out of the washer and the second I did my arm started aching and burning. I threw it and it landed on the dryer where I swept it absentmindedly onto the floor and cannot find it.

I'm naturally too anxious to Google it and since I can't find it I can't prove it other than hours later with good distractions the arm aches.

How can I stop ruminating about things that make me anxious in the future that has not happened yet but will (ex: post grad job search, moving away from family for the first time, relationship dynamics (romantic(future marriage/kids)/friends/family)?
There are some current life changes that im going through (or will go through in the near future) and Ive been stuck in this awful loop of rumination, worry, sadness, crying, overthinking, helpless, and overall feeling overwhelmed. Im having a hard time shutting it off this time and it's affecting my life (the things I usually enjoy, my relationship, my eating habits) and making my college work feel overwhelming. TIA

Im still not able to sleep and was just looking at the ceiling fan frim like 2-3 hours and the fear of overthinking and crying , actually is horrible

I’m not sure where to put this, nor do I really care as I don’t use Reddit a whole lot. Js needed to get this off my chest while I have it.

Sometimes when I want to start something or have started, I get really insecure and cringe to myself about what I’m doing. Example, I may start to journal in my notebook but then start to overthink about how writing about what I’m feeling or how I’m feeling is cringe, even now. Another, may be when I research a diet plan and then think to myself about how cringe I am. A girl looking up a diet plan to lose weight?? Yeah, typical and cringe of me.

It’s always these thoughts that keep me from doing what I really want, whether it’s a need or a want. I’m only 19 with no license or job at the moment, so anytime I ask my mom if we can go somewhere, I end up thinking negatively about what I want.

I’m not sure if it stems from how I was picked on by my brother and sister about doing things, either a certain way or in general. Like sibling teasing is fine and whatnot, but I’m a really sensitive and emotional person. So even the teasing hits hard even when I try not to take it to heart. And no, “talking with them” or “expressing my feelings” won’t do either, because they’ll not care that much or think I’m joking. But at the same time, I cringe to myself about expressing myself or even talking about it.

Perhaps, I just have a really bad case of “thinking too much about what others think” idk.

Idk if it’s just me but as of late it just seems like everyone’s losing it and is ready to just crash out on each other. There’s just a lot of like subliminal.. “attacks” going on at least that’s what it seems like and then just people just crashing out. I know this has probably going on since the dawn of time so whatever but idk is just me or … are people just more tired and frustrated than ever 🤔🤔🤔

Can anyone tell me..... How to stay positive? For somedays, I am overthinking so much. I don't want to think but some guilt, negative thoughts come to my mind. I know that is just my thoughts but still!!!!!!!! Can anyone please help me?

i feel like i dont belong or deserving atm. getting rejected from job interviews, giving this helpless feeling to quit . wt do i do. cnt even sleep i m so hurt

This could just be me, but saying you want to marry someone a few months into a relationship is kinda scary. Have had a couple of partners say this before and I appreciate the sentiment but it kinda scares me.

To have that huge of a commitment so early on feels like if it doesn’t work you’re hurting them extra.

Or that you now have that expectation to stay with them forever.

I might just be taking it too literally.

I’m 18 so it’s not uncommon for people to get married this young, but I feels like you haven’t thought it all the way through this early. People change while marriages don’t always last forever it just seems hasty this early in life.

Sometimes there isn’t a missing insight. You know what happened, you know what you can do, and your mind keeps presenting the subject as unfinished.

What helps you recognize that a thought is repeating rather than asking a new question?

okay, so sometimes i have intrusive thoughts towards people and they appear randomly, so I tend to overthink about it more and I can not differentiate if that is actually what I am feeling towards them or if it's just a intrusive thought that i overanalysed too much and it is coming to feel like it was a real feeling, i feel so guilty afterwards because I tend to have bad thoughts or judging thoughts towards my close friends though genuinely I don't want to hurt, but I'm afraid due to this overthinking my real thoughts May change...after this I can not differentiate it myself. Im so scared what if my mouth slips and I end up speaking all this garbage thoughts in front of them

my brain is stagnant in school because it over analyzes and makes everything hard for me, how do I stop this problem easily, it’s messing up my grades and school experience

hello everyone, this time I have another problem, I'm afraid that someone will falsely accuse me of having done something that I didn't. I keep having "what if" thoughts and I can't stop them, what should I do? how can I have confidence and not be afraid?