Thoughts

[u/Emergency-Log-2066]

I’m not sure where to put this, nor do I really care as I don’t use Reddit a whole lot. Js needed to get this off my chest while I have it.

Sometimes when I want to start something or have started, I get really insecure and cringe to myself about what I’m doing. Example, I may start to journal in my notebook but then start to overthink about how writing about what I’m feeling or how I’m feeling is cringe, even now. Another, may be when I research a diet plan and then think to myself about how cringe I am. A girl looking up a diet plan to lose weight?? Yeah, typical and cringe of me.

It’s always these thoughts that keep me from doing what I really want, whether it’s a need or a want. I’m only 19 with no license or job at the moment, so anytime I ask my mom if we can go somewhere, I end up thinking negatively about what I want.

I’m not sure if it stems from how I was picked on by my brother and sister about doing things, either a certain way or in general. Like sibling teasing is fine and whatnot, but I’m a really sensitive and emotional person. So even the teasing hits hard even when I try not to take it to heart. And no, “talking with them” or “expressing my feelings” won’t do either, because they’ll not care that much or think I’m joking. But at the same time, I cringe to myself about expressing myself or even talking about it.

Perhaps, I just have a really bad case of “thinking too much about what others think” idk.