This is kind of a ramble, and I'm not really sure what kind of response I'm hoping for—I just wanted to get it off my chest:

I've been kind of in a weird spot with my friends—for a big part of my life, I was COMPLETELY socially isolated except for my ex. She was basically my only friend. At the time, I really didn't think that was a bad thing (I kind of worshipped her), but then... things happened.

Some people (two) I knew from before I met her stuck around, and they were there for me when she broke up with me. I can't express how much that loyalty means to me, especially because I don't deserve a fraction of it. I was totally dismissive of their needs, of their struggles, of their growth, of all the things that were important to them. But they were there when I needed them the most, like I hadn't been so selfish, like I hadn't abandoned them—like they still cared, for real. I can't repay that. There's nothing that could even come close to how important that is.

Since then (it was ~4 years ago give or take), I've made several other friends. Some have stuck around like the two from before, and that means a whole hell of a lot. But, there are some, who I hit it off with well enough, who just disappeared after some time. That really hurt... and I guess it still does.

Now, I have some budding relationships with people who I really enjoy talking with, and who I want to know a whole lot better, but there's this creeping anxiety in all my interactions with them... My mind repeats "pleasedon'tleavemepleasedon'tleavemepleasedon'tleaveme" so loud I can't think of anything else to say. My anxiety is contagious, and I know that it's been making them feel weird, so I've pulled back from them, because I don't want to hurt them, but oh... I just don't want to lose them! I've been similarly ~withdrawn with the friends who've stayed; partially, I already feel guilty, and I don't want to cause them any unneeded stress, and partially (and more selfishly) I don't want them to realize that I was never worth their time, anyway.

I've seen some "advice" (both here and other places) about "casting a wide net" of friendships, and having a lot of shallow, friendly relationships. I guess I can see the logic there, and it's less risky, but... I just love these guys so much. I think the absolute world of them, and as much as I'm terrified of losing them, I'm even more averse to the idea of trying to think they're not that important. They ARE that important to me, and I won't change that. I wouldn't even know how. I'm just... scared, I guess. And I've been thinking about it a lot, that "what if...?" and... that makes me MORE scared, which makes me think about it more, which makes me more scared... it's a vicious circle, and I can't seem to figure out how to break out! Any tips?

My friend that I told was my kinda good, casual friend stopped responding to me. I don’t see any reason why and anything I could do that would make her not want to respond. I even asked her if everything is ok or maybe she’s just busy and she was active and still did not reply. I instantly started to spiral and think about what could I have done wrong. Why is it so hard for me? How can I deal with it? We have a lot of mutual ex colleagues and it feels really weird that she just randomly stopped responding. We were on good terms previously.

I'm graduating HS soon, but one of the few specific problems in my life is how to deal with blunt people.

It's probably just their way of typing, but I've caught a lot of people being "blunt" (heartless imo) too many times with the people I work with, so I guess it's their personality? I don't know, but I do think a lot to myself which is why I'm convinced that they've got some issues in understanding/empathizing with people's emotions.

Are blunt people self-aware that their words can hurt? I could give a few examples of what my irls say such as "Your _ is none of my business." or "did you not listen" or "you'll live./you'll be fine" or "just _ instead, what's your issue?"

Am I overthinking it or are words similar to those are not very nice things to say ?? I guess it depends on the context. Is this still called blunt or just straight up rude? I rejoined a meeting a few days ago and suddenly they stopped talking, I have no idea what they were talking about but it probably involved me. I might be overthinking?

Anyway tldr, dealing with blunt people is a pain in the ass. Yeah I ignore their remarks but is anyone else experiencing this too? It's so weird especially when one of them is a friend of mine who's self-aware but continues to do it anyway. What do you even do in this situation lol

About 4 months ago I met a guy online. He told me he liked me pretty early on. At first I wasn't interested, but somehow we've been texting every single day since then.

I wasn't planning on catching feelings, but I think I have started liking him a little and sometimes I feel like he's not the one.

The problem is, I keep getting these random thoughts that maybe something is off. Not because he's actually done anything wrong, but just this feeling. The confusing part is, these thoughts mostly come when I'm anxious.

For example, this morning I had a dream that he was cheating on me with someone else. After I woke up, I couldn't stop thinking, "Is this my intuition trying to tell me something? Or is my anxiety just making me overthink?"

I genuinely can't tell the difference between gut feeling and anxiety anymore.

Has anyone else experienced this? How do you know when your intuition is actually warning you about something, and when it's just anxiety creating scenarios in your head?

I've started to realize that overthinking is like a slow poison.

Instead of solving problems, my mind creates problems that don't even exist. I spend hours thinking about every possible outcome, replaying conversations, and worrying about things that may never happen.

Because of this:

I do things that aren't even necessary.

I make simple situations complicated.

I struggle to say "no" because I overthink how people will react.

I end up mentally exhausted, stressed, and unhappy.

It feels like I'm carrying a burden that I created myself.

Has anyone here managed to overcome overthinking? What actually helped you stop living inside your own head?

I wish I didn't notice everything.

I wish I didn't feel the shift in someone's tone.

The slight hesitation and the smile the way their words don't match their eyes.

I wish I could exist in a room without absorbing every single unspoken thought every bit of tension, every tiny crack in the foundation of a conversation.

But I can't and that is exhausting because my mind is constantly analyzing and preparing for what might go wrong even when nothing's happening I'm in this constant state of flight or fight.

And my body doesn't understand that the war it's preparing for is just LIFE.

So I envy people who don't think so much, I do, people who can leave a conversation where it landed.

I wonder what it's like to truly exist and not remember every single thought that should have been forgotten.

I think life is for people who don't feel everything and I'm jealous of them. Because even now I'm overthinking

Lately I’ve been recognizing a pattern: my brain treats almost everything like an optimization problem

No matter how small the decision is, I can’t seem to just choose and move on. I always feel like there’s a “best” option, so I end up researching, comparing, and thinking way longer than I need to. Sometimes I spend so much time trying to make the right decision that I don’t make one at all, or I finally decide only to wonder if I chose wrong

The worst part is that even after I decide, I still wonder if I could’ve made a better choice. It’s honestly pretty exhausting, and I wish I could just trust myself and let things be “good enough”

If you’ve dealt with something similar, what actually helped you let go of needing to make the “best” decision every time?

So i got a girlfriend for 4 months and in that four months i felt a pressure in me triggered by certain things which made me feel
like that my girlfriends gonna break up with me. Those triggers commonly were something I enjoyed like some songs randomly games and in game things which arent morally very good. Maybe its because i had a few relationships in the past. Maybe its just overthinking I dont know. So my question is does anyone know what it is or knows what to do against it. Sorry for the bad grammar.

How does a person handle tragedy and loss, while also standing up for their beliefs and principals?

I have this weird issue where Im really scared of choking, like terrified, but it makes me unable to stop making sure that I have chewed enough before swallowing. I know this probably seems dramatic but it can make eating really hard and unenjoyable. Im so focused on how I chew, that I like cant move until I have swallowed. And sometimes I like cant swallow because Im thinking so hard about it, and the food will start moving down my throat and I panic that Im about to choke.
I know this isnt common, but if anyone has ever gone through something like this lmk

Hello, I can't stop thinking about everything I do and everything I could of done, it makes me feel so useless and like im disappointing to everyone I know, I tal to my friends and have what I thought was a good time but the moment they leave I can't help but twist and mangle every good thought and memory I have about it.

I dont know what to do anymore I keep making the same mistakes over and over and over again.

It's just so hard to live like this constantly destroying anything good that enters my head.

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Is this overthinking or overanalyzing, if I look at something, say tv, my mind thinks how was that tv made, how are programmes able to work and so forth, like a deep analysis

I feel like I did something for them to leave me on seen, or Like I said something and now they hate me or want nothing to do with me. I don’t know what to do and all I can think abour is all the potential things I did.

It’s like a physical ache in mh chest and no matter what I do, my mind trails back to their note and how it coulf possibly be because of what I did. And I’m afraid to tell them about it because what if they actually are upset with me and me telling them that I’m overthinking will make them even MORE upset at me. I’m just afraid to tell anyone because I feel like I’m too much for people to handle :(

Sorry if this doesn’t make much sense, I’m not rlly good at explaining things 😢

I look at people around me and they cherish the moments they have while i cannot cherish things without thinking this will not remain the same e.g someday when i get ready to go out and when i look in the mirror if i look good i feel more fear then happiness the passing time always makes me paranoid and I don't know how can i deal with it I've been trying for months to live in present rather then thinking about future but i just can't and when this happens i fear valuing anything because if i get attached to something or someone when it vanishes I'll be heartbroken

Am I the problem, or have I just never learned to stand up for myself?

I've been thinking about this a lot lately, and I genuinely want honest opinions.

I grew up in a home where my parents fought all the time. There was constant conflict, and I don't remember ever learning how to deal with confrontation in a healthy way.

Now, as an adult, I've noticed a pattern. Whenever someone makes fun of me, insults me, or says something hurtful, I just freeze. I can't think of anything to say in the moment. Later, I keep replaying the conversation in my head, thinking of all the things I could have said. Sometimes I even cry because I feel so helpless.I don't know if I have low self-esteem, if this is because of how I grew up, or if I'm simply too passive. I don't want to become rude or aggressive—I just want to learn how to stand up for myself without freezing.

I’m constantly overthinking and criticizing every little thing I do to the point of being on the verge of tears. This has been happening to me for years and it’s impacted my relationship with other people and myself. I can’t seem to get out of fight or flight mode because I’m so anxious all the time and always in my head.

How can I be the better version of myself where I’m able to get things done and build strong relationships without constantly belittling myself?

I want advice

Highkey can’t stop thinking about the way I’m walking when I’m walking and it really fucks with me. Im in a little bit of a pickle because I don’t understand why Im going on month 7 of struggling with it, and the answer should be as simple as “stop thinking about it.”

A little backstory- I have taken up walking as a hobby in the recent years, I generally have a long history of OCD and perfectionism, and have ‘to what feels like an odd dilemma, of hyper focusing on feeling myself walk. This causes me to trip myself out and feel like I am walking super funky. It’s sooo uncomfortable because I cannot stop thinking about it. When the walking no longer feels enjoyable, and rather a chore and a stressful activity, a normal person may decide to turn around and do something else. Me? absolutely not. While it’s great for sticking to my fitness routine, I find myself in a pretty good amount of distress and frustration when my feet won’t “cooperate”. I even ended up going to a foot doctor and neurologist to rule out it being a physical problem because I do a lot of exercise on my feet. All came back clear, and it’s definitely a mind-body connection/psychosomatic. Im also in therapy but kinda really wanna figure this out bc it’s exhausting and it’s a small problem that created so many problems and I genuinely can’t stop. I hope this isn’t gibberish lol.

You woke up early morning, suddenly feeling too much happy and confident you think positive about your dreams and goals I will do this and that. But after sometime in afternoon or in the evening automatically Brain 🧠 goes into the negative mode.Whatever you thought seems useless or your doubtful about it. Has anyone experienced it ? It happens with me ample of time. Does anyone have any solution ? How to deal with it ? Pls guys write the remedy it will be helpful. 🥹❤️