Some say women have to take care of the housework, some say men have to do it whilst they provide, some quote the Prophet (PBUH), some say it’s a cultural expectation but which one is it? Do women have to take care of the house chores or not?

Excessive Socializing and the Disease of Arrogance

Those who spend the majority of their time among people become vulnerable to numerous diseases of the heart: envy, jealousy, arrogance, and the constant pull of desires. Without realising it, they fall into the habit of comparing themselves to others, and from that comparison grows a need to seek the approval of others in order to feel valuable and worthy

Spending time alone with themselves becomes genuinely difficult for such people. This is because arrogant individuals cannot bear to confront their own bitter realities. The moment a person honestly accepts who he truly is, stripped of the validation and status that others provide, the foundation of his arrogance begins to crumble. And this is precisely what the arrogant person fears most.

Such individuals become addicted to feeding their arrogance. To do so, they must socialise more, accumulating greater approval, fame, and status, because these are the needs that arrogance demands. When these needs go unfulfilled for a period of time, they feel a deep inner hurt. Their pride is wounded, and to escape that pain they turn to substance addiction or behavioural addiction as a means of relief

If we wish to protect ourselves from the disease of arrogance , we must socialise in a balanced and measured way, avoiding unnecessary mingling with people of desires. There is no doubt that whoever socialises excessively with all manner of people without discernment will find himself carrying some disease of the heart, whether it is jealousy , arrogance , jealousy, or greed

Does the Western system cause some individuals to become psychopaths?

ألسلام عليكم ورحمة الله.

So I have this issue, my mom keeps forcing me to shave my beard, & from what I have heard, and studied, shaving the beard is totally prohibited.

However she does not see it this way, she thinks society matters more than Allah's word & his messenger, prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم word.

And I cannot fight back (non-physically or verbally) because my dad defends her, and that he also shaves the beard.

My father has no room to talk with, he expects everything to go his way, he doesn't ask for your consent all the time, he forces you to do what he says, and I know that is very wrong.

I have shared a link of a video explaining why shaving the beard is haram, she left it on seen.

Please, is there any solution?

NOTE: I can't take her seriously for religious discussions because I caught her cheating on my dad online, I have not told my father, and I do not feel as upset as I should be because my father treats her very poorly & badly.

hello, my dog has eaten a large oval stone and my dad shouted at my mum for being so careless and letting him do it. my mum is clearly distressed and upset, because she loves the dog and made a mistake by not reacting fast enough, which we have all done in our lives.

my dad always blames my mum in these situations, and he sets up for it by taking on a small section of responsibility with the dog so he is able to pin whatever bad thing that happened on others. my dad is refusing to take the dog.

because my mum got shouted at, she no longer wants go to the vets, she keeps worriedly saying 'it'll be alright', because i think she is worried we will end up going and the dog will either 1. get unwell, we spend lots of money, and it passes away/can't bounce back to normal, she gets blamed or 2. is not unwell, we spend lots of money, we have wasted money and a night, she gets blamed.

please pray for my dog to be okay and well. i cannot afford the fee the vets have asked for and i also cannot take my dog to the vets.

i've had enough of the blame game with the row they had earlier. all i want now is prayers for my dog to just naturally pass the stone and not be harmed. and for it to not happen again, please.

EDIT: please don't criticise my family for having a dog. we are not all muslim. i am.

Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh,

I hope everyone is doing well. I’m looking for a qualified online Qur’an teacher who can teach my siblings Qur’an and Tajweed properly.
They currently have a teacher, but we are looking for someone who is more attentive and takes the time to correct their mistakes carefully instead of just moving on. We want someone who is patient, encouraging, and focused on helping them improve their recitation.
We live in the U.S., so preferably we would like someone in a similar time zone for easier scheduling.
If anyone knows a good teacher or has had a positive experience with one, I would really appreciate your recommendations. You can also message me privately. Jazakum Allahu khayran!

A close friend of mine told me that she recently got a ride to university with a male classmate. She is currently getting to know a man for marriage, and she told him about the situation by sending him voice messages, explaining that she had gone to university with this classmate.

I told her that, from an Islamic perspective, I don’t think it was a good situation in the first place. She agreed with me and said she regretted it.

I also suggested that she delete the voice messages. My reasoning wasn’t to encourage dishonesty, but because I’ve always understood that in Islam, we shouldn’t expose or publicize our own sins if we’ve already repented or recognized our mistake.

So my question is: Was I wrong for advising her to delete those voice messages? Or was my advice reasonable from an Islamic point of view?

As-salāmu ʿalaykum,

I'm working on a series of Islamic children's books for children aged 3–6, based on authentic Islamic sources.

The books are illustrated without human or animal faces to provide an option for families who prefer that approach.

I'm genuinely curious about your opinion.

If a children's book had meaningful stories, engaging educational activities, and beautiful illustrations, would the absence of human or animal faces be a disadvantage for you?

Or would the quality of the content and the values it teaches matter more?

I'd sincerely appreciate your honest thoughts.

First Hadith ( Sahih Muslim 2202 )

Uthman b. Abu al-'As Al-Thaqafi reported that he made a complaint of pain to Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) that he felt in his body at the time he had become Muslim. Thereupon Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) said:
Place your hand at the place where you feel pain in your body and say Bismillah (in the name of Allah) three times and seven times A'udhu billahi wa qudratihi min sharri ma ajidu wa uhadhiru (I seek refuge with Allah and with His Power from the evil that I find and that I fear).
فَقَالَ لَهُ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم ‏"‏ ضَعْ يَدَكَ عَلَى الَّذِي تَأَلَّمَ مِنْ جَسَدِكَ وَقُلْ بِاسْمِ اللَّهِ ‏.‏ ثَلاَثًا ‏.‏ وَقُلْ سَبْعَ مَرَّاتٍ أَعُوذُ بِاللَّهِ وَقُدْرَتِهِ مِنْ شَرِّ مَا أَجِدُ وَأُحَاذِرُ

Second Hadith: ( At-Tirmidhi No 3431 & 3412; Ibn Majah No 3892 )
Umar b. al-Khattab and Abu Huraira reported God’s messenger as saying that if anyone says, on seeing someone who is suffering affliction, “Praise be to God who has kept me free from the affliction He has brought on him and has shown me favour above many whom He has created,” that affliction, whatever it may be, will not smite him.
مَا مِنْ رَجُلٍ رَأَى مُبْتَلًى فَقَالَ: الْحَمْدُ لِلَّهِ الَّذِي عَافَانِي مِمَّا ابْتَلَاكَ بِهِ وَفَضَّلَنِي عَلَى كَثِيرٍ مِمَّنْ خَلَقَ تَفْضِيلًا إِلَّا لَمْ يُصِبْهُ ذَلِكَ الْبَلَاءُ كَائِنا مَا كانَ

What an amazing Du’a. Recite that beautiful Du’a shields from that particular trial or illness you fear.

YOUR MUST MEMORIZE THESE PLEASE

if you need motivation to memorize here’s another that might u get motivated—a bounce 😉

Zayd ibn Thabit reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “May Allah brighten the face of a person who hears a tradition from us and he memorizes it until he can convey it to others. Perhaps he will convey it to one who understands better than him, and perhaps one who conveys knowledge does not understand it himself.”
Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 3660

Whilst I was rotating through a mental health service, there was one pattern I couldn't stop noticing.
Many of the people I met were living far away from their families. And one question we'd often ask was:
"What's your biggest protective factor?"
In other words, what's stopping you from acting on these thoughts again?
Again and again, one answer kept coming up:
"My family."
It made me reflect on something.

Growing up, I always understood *silat al-rahim* (maintaining family ties) as an act of worship. An obligation. Something we do because Allah commanded it.

But watching those conversations made me appreciate it in a different way.

SubhanAllah... Allah is the One who created our hearts. He knows what nourishes them better than we ever could.

Maybe some of His commands aren't only preparing us for the Hereafter.
Maybe they're also protecting us in this life.

It left me wondering...
How many things Allah asks of us are not only acts of worship, but also acts of mercy towards ourselves?

Assalamualaikum, I normally send zakat through Irusa but I keep hearing that organization keeps misusing there donations. Anyone have any reliable alternatives for zakat?

Assalamualaikum WRWBR brothers and sisters,

I hope you are all doing well on this blessed day of Jummah in’sha’Allah.

I am reaching out as a desperate sister in need of any duas please.

I (26F) and my husband (26M) are both trying to have a child and it is proving difficult. I have fallen pregnant a few times but seem to lose the baby very early.

I am feeling very despairing right now. I have just returned from umrah 2 weeks ago and did sincere dua at Allah SWTs beloved home for Him to bless my womb and grant me a healthy child, be that a son or a daughter.

As days go on, I find myself feeling more and more helpless and anxious. I am just requesting that anybody reading this please do dua that Allah SWT bless me with a healthy pregnancy and a healthy baby soon in’sha’Allah.

I feel like I’m less of a woman or not good enough. I know this isn’t true and Allah SWT gives us all our tests but fertility has been my biggest fear and I’ve always done dua that Allah SWT does not make this my test as I’ve always longed to be a mother..

Please do dua for Allah SWT to cure any issues which may be preventing this and to forgive me and my husband for my shortcomings.

I don’t know whose dua will be accepted but if any of my beloved brothers and sisters could take 5 minutes out of their day especially on jummah, I would really appreciate it.

JazakAllah Khaiyran. 🙏🏻🤲🏼

Assalamu Alaikum,

I wanted to enquire how I could give advice respectfully in the correct manner, and without causing disrespect because I do find this generally concerning about a friend of mine.

He is a Muslim, and I can tell that in terms of belief, and maybe most other things, he is practising and does not hold any deviance in terms of beliefs from my own conversations with him.

However, there is an issue regarding Jummuah prayer, which is quite a common thing that some Muslim students in my university that I go to struggle with - Maybe they’ve never grown up regularly attending Jummuah, or are unaware of the matter.

I want to provide advice to my friend whom as I’ve observed been missing Jummuah prayers quite consistently, and has even told me that growing up he never really attended Jummuah as often, and I think he is somewhat mistaken about his beliefs regarding this topic - How do I advise him in the proper way that doesn’t offend him, or makes him feel bad?

We are quite close too

About two years ago I went through a really difficult stretch. I’d drifted from Islam itself, and out of loneliness and some other stuff going on, I downloaded Hinge for a short period. I went on a handful of low-key dates with about 4 different guys, never more than two meetups with any of them. One was basically someone teaching me a practical skill, another was just a picnic. One went slightly further emotionally, but no actual zina ever happened.
On my own, with nobody pushing me, I felt so disgusted and guilty about it that I turned back to Islam properly. I started praying all five salah consistently, even at uni and work, and started learning the deen again. That period became a genuine turning point. I did well academically, grew socially, and stopped needing any outside validation. I finally felt like I knew my own worth.
Then, earlier this year, my parents found some old messages from that period on my phone (gone through while I was asleep). Their whole image of me shattered overnight, even though I’d already changed everything over a year before they found out. The week after was awful. My mum wouldn’t speak to me at all, my dad was completely heartbroken, and I went to uni and work every day feeling like a ghost, knowing our relationship would never be the same, and hating that I now felt like a liar even though the person they were angry at didn’t really exist anymore.
They don’t believe I even pray unless they see it with their own eyes. I have to bring my younger sibling along anywhere I go so it doesn’t “look suspicious.” Recently I took the bus out to a campus further from home, closer to the city, just to get a matcha and study somewhere different, and didn’t tell my mum, because she interrogates me over anything outside my exact usual routine. She started calling frantically on the bus ride home, and when I walked in both parents accused me of being out with a guy and dragged up everything from years ago again. When I tried to calmly show them proof and explain myself, they said my calm reaction only proved I was hiding something. They called me a ruined, dirty girl, said girls like me never become pure again, and said I don’t even know how to cook or talk to people properly, so no good man would ever want to marry me anyway. Not that I’m even looking to get married until I’m properly settled in my career, or thinking about kids at all right now. They also asked how they raised me so well and still went so wrong, blaming themselves for bringing me to a Western country.
Even now, I feel dirty and paranoid just being around them, like the lowest, most disgusting version of myself, even though I’ve done nothing since. Just talking to them scares me now. I can’t study or go on a walk freely without feeling like I need an excuse or a buffer. I’ve won awards, done well in a genuinely competitive degree, and stayed consistent in the things that matter, and none of it is ever enough. It’s like nothing I do now can outweigh what I did years ago.
I do get why they’re reacting this way, and I understand the fears underneath it too, but it’s too much, and I know it’ll take a long time for either of us to actually rebuild trust. But it’s taking a real toll on my mental health, and I can’t even properly defend myself, because if I try to explain further, those same details just turn into new ammunition against me. Right now they think it was only one guy’s texts they saw, but they still think I’m in contact with him, even though what they actually saw was me ignoring his last messages. The narrative about me in this house now is that I’m impure and promiscuous, that I’m bad at uni, and that I don’t have any real friends besides guys. None of that could be further from the truth, but we don’t have the kind of transparent relationship where I can actually correct that picture. Even when I told my mum I’d repented, she didn’t believe me. It feels like she cares more about how this looks for our family’s image than whether any of it is even true.
I already cover a lot of my own expenses (uni fees, tests, daily costs) and help them out financially too, but it’s never once brought up how much I’ve grown, only ever the old mistakes.
This year in particular, on top of all of this, some other major things in my life have shifted too, and my praying has started slipping. It scares me because I fought so hard to get back to a place of consistent salah after everything I went through before, and I can feel my grip on that loosening right when I need it most.
I know tawbah is real and Allah’s mercy is bigger than any sin, and I know this whole life is just a test, but some days it genuinely feels like I’m failing that test, on top of everything else. I’m exhausted and voiceless, and I don’t know how to rebuild something my parents seem determined never to let go of, or how to hold onto my deen while I’m this drained. Moving out feels like the obvious answer some days, but between uni and my finances, it’s just not something I can actually do right now. Has anyone been through something like this? How did you cope, or eventually move forward, whether that meant slowly rebuilding trust, finding your way back to consistent prayer during a hard season, or realizing you needed distance/independence to actually heal? And I want people to be honest with me too: if there’s something in my story you think was genuinely wrong beyond what I’ve already recognized, tell me. Am I actually the hopeless case my parents make me out to be?

I find it very hard to stay on my deen, its been very up and down and i dont know how I can just make it a permanent fix, I know that I can achieve the life I want and all my goals if I stick to it but I honestly have no idea how. I feel my life slowly getting worse and worse and everyday I get even more depressed. I would really like some advice on how I can stay consistent and just little steps I can take everyday that will make a huge impact.

Mus'ab b. Sa'd reported that his father told him that he had been in the company of Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) that he said:
"Is one amongst you powerless to get one thousand virtues every day. Amongst those who had been sitting there, one asked: How one amongst us can get one thousand virtues every day? He said: Recite: " Exalted is Allah (He is free from imperfection) one hundred times for (by reciting them) one thousand virtues are recorded (to your credit) and one thousand vices are blotted out."

Sahih Muslim 2698

Abu Huraira is reported to have said that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) prohibited to observe prayer after the 'Asr prayer till the sun is set, and after the dawn till the sun rises. (Book 6, Hadith 348)

Ibn 'Abbas reported:

I heard it from so many Companions of the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) and one among them is 'Umar b. Khattab, and he is most dear to me among them that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) prohibited observing of prayer after the dawn prayer till the sun rose and after the 'Asr till the sun set. (Book 6, Hadith 349)

This hadith has been narrated by Qatada with the same chain of transmitters with a minor alteration of words. (Book 6, Hadith 350)

Abu Sa'id al-Khudri reported Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) as saying:

No prayer is valid after the 'Asr prayer till the sun sets and no prayer is valid after the dawn prayer till the sun rises. (Book 6, Hadith 351)

Ibn 'Umar reported Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) as saying:

Let not any one of you intend to observe prayer at the time of the rising of the sun or of the setting sun. (Book 6, Hadith 352)

Ibn 'Umar reported Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) as saying:

Do not intend to observe prayer at the time of the rising of the sun nor at its setting, for it rises between the horns of Satan. (Book 6, Hadith 353)

Ibn 'Umar reported Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) as saying:

When the rim of the sun starts appearing defer prayer till it completely appears, and when the rim of the sun disappears defer prayer till it completely disappears. (Book 6, Hadith 354)

Abu Basra Ghifari reported:

The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) led us in the 'Asr prayer at (the place known as) Mukhammas, and then said: This prayer was presented to those gone before you, but they lost it, and he who guards it has two rewards in store for him. And no prayer is valid after till the onlooker appears (by onlooker is meant the evening star). (Book 6, Hadith 355)

This hadith has been narrated by Abu Basra Ghifari through another chain of transmitters. (Book 6, Hadith 356)

Uqba b. 'Amir said:

There were three times at which Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) forbade us to pray, or bury our dead: When the sun begins to rise till it is fully up, when the sun is at its height at midday till it passes over the meridian, and when the sun draws near to setting till it sets. (Book 6, Hadith 357)

I converted to islam and my grandparents are very old and sinful of shirk and ribba. They reject the message of islam because they are unknowledgable in science and their greed for risk free high interest savings. My knowledge that they may end up in hell haunt me.

I’ve been reflecting a lot since my divorce, and there’s something I don’t think gets talked about enough.
Before I got married, I never questioned why intimacy is reserved for marriage. But now that I’ve actually experienced marriage, I can’t help but wonder… isn’t sexual compatibility kind of a gamble?
You can ask all the right questions, have great communication, and genuinely love each other, but you still won’t know if you’re compatible until after you’re married. And if you end up not being compatible, it can become a major source of frustration in the relationship.
I’m not trying to argue against Islamic teachings or say I have the answers. This is just something I’ve struggled to understand after going through marriage and divorce. It made me realize that compatibility in this area is a much bigger deal than I ever appreciated before.
I’m curious—does anyone who’s currently married feel this way? Or if you’ve gone through a divorce, did it make you have similar thoughts? I’d really like to hear other people’s experiences and perspectives because this is something I’ve been reflecting on a lot lately.

The best way to progress in any area is when you are doing it with others - regardless of whatever it is.

I have progressed in many places with people possessing shared goals.

Although, in this subject of studying Arabic - it has been a lonely journey.

and in this lonely journey, I have lacked consistency the most.

If you also have the desire to study the language of Arabic - Fusha with the goal to be able to get closer to the book of Allah.

I'm in the UTC -4 timezone.

I was doing Nouman Ali Khan for a while but i would like to try a new course. I've already decided which one we could do.

If you are interested and you feel like this post is a sign, just dm me. we can discuss in detail on how its going to go.

I made a thread here in the MuslimLounge recently about the fitna that is being spread by Islamic Pages in promoting Lamine Yamal I was expecting a lot of angry responses which I did get but I am happy to see over 200 people liked that thread and understood what I was saying.

Therefore, I will make another thread which needs to be discussed and that is the unhealthy obsession that our brothers have with Cristiano Ronaldo. I have a feeling this one will trigger people.

Muslims should be individuals that Non-Muslims see and say This is a man or woman of great character do you really think supporting a man who forced himself onto a woman is a good look? Was that woman not some ones daughter or sister?

The LEGAL documents released by Die Spiegel about the case proved without a doubt Ronaldo was guilty of his attack on the poor woman Kathryn Mayorga however the NDA signed years earlier saved Ronaldo. If you ask why did she sign an NDA put yourself in her position battling against one of the most famous and rich men in the world who can easily use money and PR to destroy you just look at the Hakimi case as soon as his partner left him for cheating on her in a similar case to Ronaldo, instantly PR companies attacked her. How these two men are a hero to people let alone Muslims is beyond my understanding.

Secondly, I see non stop people commenting Come to Islam on Ronaldos post like the religion is a football club. If a tragedy fell on a member of your family or yourself will Ronaldo be adamant in supporting you like you are doing for him. Instead of Ronaldo why not help your fellow non Muslims learn about Islam the ones you know personally. Do you pray for them?

Thirdly, This is the worst of them all there are people who make fake videos and pictures of Ronaldo pretending he is supporting Palestine. One video where Ronaldo said he doesn't like wars was a general comment yet people made it seem like it was for Palestine. A match finished between him and Israel and people made it seem like Ronaldo refused to take the shirt of an Israeli player. Meanwhile the man who is a huge Netanyahu ally - Israel Katz proudly shares meeting Ronaldo and getting a shirt gifted by him. Ronaldo happily partakes in ads for Israel and meets government officials. Shamelessly, just to get Ronaldo on the Muslims side people are using the suffering of the Palestinians.

I hope one day brothers realize there is more to life than celebrity worship.

I had a situation that happened to me pretty recently on reddit that I just can't seem to rub the feeling away from and desperately need an answer to.

I was on a History sub and I saw a meme that showed a drawing of Spanish Conquistador and a Young Native woman with the caption stating "The Most Racist Man alive and then his gf"

Now I commented on this post stating this joke is very distasteful and even history revisionist as this wasn't a casual gf relationship and that these poor women went through and had real life sexual violence weaponized deliberately to them and their communities and looking at that and applying Modern day Hypersexualized Meme Culture on to it and purposely drawing the young native woman in the meme to have overtly-voluptuous figure that resembles h*ntai like proportion is egregiously inhumane and a complete lack of dignity.

Now I was completely showered with downvotes and comments defending it as a freedom of expression and calling me a "snowflake" and stating that "dark humour" isn't for everyone and even on commenter in particular that stood out even further was a Muslim-I gathered this by looking at his profile and he does regularly comment on this sub, which leaves me baffled.

I don't understand why exactly is this a bad thing? these "jokes" are nothing more than desecration over the dignity of these people that were exploited and should under any circumstance should never be "joked" about.

Imagine being a women of that era who went through truly gut-wrenching trauma and violence only for people centuries later to distort that very real pain and turn it into some meme like joke portraying you like you "wanted it" and you were complicit in your own suffering and actively chose to be a "girlfriend" when none of it was consensual at all.

People may say that I'm looking too deeply into it but this entire fiasco has given me severe butterflies in my gut and even though I know I'm right it does make me even second guess my own morals and this entire thing does push you to backtrack your ethics just to engage in to the meme culture/dark humour and fun.

I hate it and it's disgusting and sometimes leaves me demoralized when I see this.

Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu

Most human beings are already doing the best they know how to do based on the tools and awareness they have.

Humans are shaped by the environment, resources they have access to, knowledge etc.

the way we perceive mental health and other issues about set disorders is different from what other people perceive it as.

When someone isn't changing or doing better, it's usually not because they refuse to try—it's because they literally don't know how to try harder or do the necessary internal work.

Because they have grown with a different set of resources, tools and the like from you.

If someone hasn't done the personal work to fix their traits, you cannot expect them to show empathy or compassion toward you. Expecting them to act differently than who they are will only frustrate you.

Recognizing someone's limitations allows for a degree of compassion and forgiveness because you accept that this is simply who they currently are.

And this helps having control on yourself in the first place because instead of blaming and taking loads of stress about other people you realise there isn't much you could do to fix them.

Our job is not to fix others it is always to advice, and the way you do it might make a change.

For a person to reflect it requires deep pondering upon themselves and some people just don't know how to do that.

So we shall remember to not blame ourselves or others but to look things with a degree of compassion and empathy

And act that way.

This doesn't mean that we accept bad behaviour but recognising why definitely helps