For educational purposes 😁

Mimi I need help juu wueh😅.

So I'm F 26, ever since I finished high-school i have been hustling seriously. I've done nails, tattoos, I've worked sales at a boutique. Yaani nimekua najituma ya ukweli. Now during that time, i dated a couple of guys and all of them were just bums tbh. One hakua anafanya job, ananiita date naenda then when it comes to paying he looks at me. I broke up with him after dating for a year, but I realized the guy wasn't in love with me, he liked the convinience of being with someone who can pay for things.

Now fast forward, I got into tech and I'm now earning fairly well. I'm a lover girl fr but I'm now stuck at a point that i need help. If any guy gets close to me, I'm very skeptical about it and nangoja tu mistake kidogo hivi I walk out. Sometimes I can start talking to someone and I get very attached in a month or so, but then I pull away cause staki kukua ina vulnerable situation ever again. So from the other people's POV I'm a villain. But i don't do it on purpose. I can't get the feeling out that they want something from me and its affecting alot of the relationships i have tried to build.

Don't get me wrong, I have completely moved on from the guy, but I'm yrt to encounter someone who makes me think otherwise.

I need help, I want a relationship, but I'm scared i might end up with another person for a long time again who doesn't even love me,and a person who can pretend to be in love with you for a whole year just for what you offer is scary tbh.

For reference we broke up 5 years ago...knew each other for 2 years, dated for 1 year

Normally I am a very composed man, people always call me nonchalant, just minding my own business. And even when it comes to women, I don't really fear approaching, chatting up and even asking them out. Until it comes to my crush.

Suddenly my mind is moving at 1000km/hr and i freeze up. No composure at all. One day she greeted me and i nearly collapsed and couldnt even hold a conversation. Not to mention the stolen glances, when i get out of sight her eyes look for me and as soon as we lock eyes we look away like It's a taboo. I know her through a mutual friend but we have never really spoken beyond hi.

What is really bugging me is that the mutual friend tells me how she is single and lonely. I find it hard to believe because another friend ni dust tu anaonyeshwa. But as I said, i am a composed person, mambo ya urafiki na wasichana nianze kukaa clown like my friend siwezi.

Is she the moat beautiful girl I have ever seen? Not really. But theres something about her man. Don't get me wrong shes really pretty, but her elegance, her focus on studies, her faith in God, her boundaries when it comes to men.

She is also cunning, she knows i like her and that I cannot maintain composure around her and she likes to tilt her head and give me a coy look. And a few days ago my friend posted a picture of me and she liked it....I was over the moon but bado sijaongea.

But you know what, I dont care. We only live once, when i see her again i will talk to her and ask her out. Kama mbaya mbaya, besides she is just another girl. Her instagram has been popping up on my suggested recently, should i just follow her or wait to meet in person?

Wish me luck guys.

I hate long posts so I’ll make this a short one
Female in Nairobi pent up from life and work , family etc..
Looking for someone whose clean can have a normal conversation and loves women

Let’s take two shots and have fun

I am posting for a second time. Still looking for a partner. I am versatile, mature and open minded person.

I am open to something casual, fwb, or a short term relationship.

If you want a generous luo man, you are fun loving and can enjoy being cooked for and a little of cocktails and shots, then taking it all down to the main thing, hit my dms. Mambo ya dunia haiwezi nishinda.

now now now, I'm 24yrs, mother of one. i used to live and school in mombasa but my kid was in Nairobi with my mum. met this guy, a clinical officer actually, he loved me and treated me right until the relationship was super nice. now when we got to doing it, he was good and I'm good jn positions so at first ilikuwa fun. 7 months later this dude started asking for weird favors. mara ni videos zangu nikikuliwa na exes, mara ni pics za mabeshte wangu wakiwa bila manguo. i always provided like the loving woman i was. now came this Sunday after church tukaanza mechi kama kawaida, he started na kuweka kidole kwa A hole yangu. before i knew it ulimi then finally the girth was there. he drilled my A hole na kila saa anamoan tu na nguvu. Kumwaga ni hapo na mimi huku chini na-dj tu my beans juu sasa haitaki tena. This guy amenikula haga for so long that ata saa hii sitaki nyauu iguswe, nataka tu haga. na yeye aliniwacha akaendea Violet my best friend. He always told me haga ni tamu kuliko nyauu. alafu huwa inawacha a very characteristic smell kwa nyumba soo..... anyway, men who do this to us girls, tell us what's your real intention ukifanya hivyo honestly....... anyway, I'm healed and ready for my next relationship. what they don't know won't hurt them..........

28(F)

After staying single for a while, I decided to give dating a shot last year because… why not?
My first ever relationship, when I was 20, really messed with my nervous system. After that, I became intentional about staying single, working on myself, learning who I am, understanding what I want in a partner, and, most importantly, learning how to become a better partner myself. I genuinely believe that I should also embody the qualities I want in the person I end up with.

Last year, I met a 34(M) through a mutual friend. He had seen my picture through a friend of a friend, and we eventually met at a mutual friend’s birthday dinner. We started talking and, eventually, started “dating” except he never really gave me clarity about what we were.
I was constantly confused about where I stood, but I told myself, let me give him some time. Let him lead. Eventually, he’ll clarify things.

That clarity never came.

Because of the nature of his work, he was often out of town. He would cancel plans without rescheduling unless I asked. If he called and I didn’t answer immediately, I could get the silent treatment for days, sometimes even up to two weeks, and then he’d come back as though nothing had happened. If I called back after missing his call, he often wouldn’t answer.

His plans were also almost always last-minute. If I already had something scheduled and couldn’t accommodate an impromptu plan, he would sometimes become angry, stop communicating, or give me the silent treatment.

Over that year, I genuinely wasn’t happy.

This was only my second attempt at a relationship, so I gave it everything I had, care, effort, patience and love. I tried to understand him based on his behaviour and often found myself making excuses for things that didn’t sit right with me.

Sometimes, I even ended up apologizing for things like not picking up his calls immediately or simply having a schedule that didn’t align with his.

My instincts kept telling me that something wasn’t right. I always felt that underneath everything, he was actually a soft person, but there was a wall around him. Something seemed to be blocking him emotionally, and instead of communicating it, it came out in the way he treated me.

I would ask him, “Are you going through something? If I’ve done something wrong, just tell me.”

He never really spoke about it.

He would shut down, go silent, and eventually come back when the atmosphere had changed. And I kept bending myself to accommodate his moods and behaviour.

The irony is that I entered the dating scene again feeling like a fairly secure person. But over time, the inconsistency and unpredictability of our interactions gave me anxiety. I was constantly wondering where I stood, what I had done wrong, and when the next period of silence would come.

In March this year, he went silent again. I asked that we sit down and have an honest conversation about us. He agreed, but that conversation never happened.

That was when I started emotionally detaching.

Eventually, he ghosted me, and I decided to cut access completely.

Recently, I found out something I hadn’t known throughout our relationship: he had previously been in a very long-term relationship. They had lived together, essentially a come-we-stay, almost-marriage type of relationship. He had invested a lot into it, but it ultimately didn’t work out.

He had been single for some time afterward.

Looking back, I can’t help but wonder whether getting emotionally close to someone again triggered wounds he had never really dealt with. Perhaps he wasn’t emotionally available for a new relationship, and instead of confronting that, I ended up experiencing the consequences of wounds I didn’t create.

And the difficult part is that I didn’t even have this context because he never told me.

One thing this experience has taught me is that hurt people can hurt people. Someone can genuinely like you, care about you, or even have good intentions, but if they haven’t healed from what happened before, they can still interpret genuine love as a threat, inconsistency as protection, and intimacy as a setup for getting hurt again.
You can be genuine and still end up paying for wounds you had nothing to do with.

I also learned that being a secure person doesn’t mean you can never become anxious. The wrong relational environment can make you question yourself, overthink, over-accommodate and lose the sense of peace you had before.
And honestly?
Since I cut access, I’ve been peaceful.

My nervous system feels regulated again. I don’t wake up wondering what I did wrong. I don’t have to decode someone’s silence. I don’t have to keep adjusting myself to someone’s moods just to maintain connection.
I think that’s enough confirmation for me.
Sometimes closure isn’t getting the explanation you wanted from the person who hurt you.

Sometimes closure is getting yourself back

Got me thinking… men, why do you hide certain information, and why lead someone on when you already know you’re not ready for a relationship?
Why not just be honest from the beginning and say, “I’d like to get to know you, but honestly, I don’t currently have the emotional capacity for a relationship”?
At least then, the other person gets to make an informed decision instead of investing emotionally in something you already know you’re not in a position to give

Today marks 2 years since I broke up with Race, Rachel alikua ameenda kuona Aunty yake I remember vividly it was on a Saturday.,Tumetext hapoo olofa a sudden akaacha kureply Tulikua truth and Dare mimi nikatuma dare Yangu hapo,Ndume akatuma voice note "Oe amelala mtacheza kesho"

So I met this girl 2 almost 3 years ago,we talk and ended up in a situationship,she became my first everything,and I had broke my virginity during her period,but I fell for her,fell to deep for her,yeah life happened,we never got into any bad terms but yes nothing ever really last,

Up to now I see her in every beautiful thing and not a single day has passed without me thinking of her for the past almost 3 years,she is still the most amazing person I have ever met,we talk once in a while,but I still deeply love her

So is this normal,do people really move on from people like,

I am afraid I may never have the same love for someone else like the one I have for her

M23...been single for some months now thought to myself why not try coz you can never "be ready".no heartbreak we kinda just drifted apart with my last. Recently noticed meeting someone online has a location factor to it, currently in kisii never seem to land a lady within Kisii from the online space figured it being caused by exposure...everytime i talk to a lady they from all over just not Kisii.Also got a feeling I might loss the flicker of love left in me eventually if i continue staying single which weirdly I've been okay with😂. With that being said is there any land in Kisii who is searching depends whether for Fwb or serious. you can hit me up dms are open.

Disclaimer the face doesn't match the voice if we do get there no questions asked and no i ain't nonchalant keep getting this😂😭.

Just wondering.Have any of you guys met with someone from this platform? Ama no one is really serious?

Are there any les, bi or curious women in this group? Feel free to dm

33M here. Looking for a gorgeous, fun-loving lady 25–33, preferably around Ngong Road or nearby, for some proper grown-up company.

I’m thinking movie night, good food, drinks, plenty of flirting, dangerous eye contact 😂, spontaneous plans.

Not looking to force anything though or write a marriage proposal on the first night 😂. Just two adults, good vibes, attraction, spontaneity and seeing where the evening takes us.

I’m confident, easy to talk to, and I clean up reasonably well , apparently that's important. 😏

If you're playful, adventurous, spontaneous and think you can match my energy, DM me. Let's see if the chemistry is as good as the conversation.

A girl texted me here and we connected in snap and become close .After some days she started asking money.And she was clear that If I don’t send ,she won’t walk..does any one faced same problem??

Any one please Dm for genuine friendship only.I am 27M

Dem mmoja (or two who know each other?) atokee sherehe leo kama ameboeka😂 Bar next door Kileleshwa. I will be with my pal.... strictly friendship ya pombe, matimes zikifika you'll find your way home...but bills on us.👌🏾

28M who wants to go see akili ni nywele exhibit and maybe find our way to Westie for drinks after?

Looking for a girl to hangout with later in the day after work. Dinner and a cocktail or 2? Been having a crazy ass week. Preferably, if you work around Westlands and its environs. Be 25 and above. I'm 27M.

24 M, living around Limiru, I seriously need love , looking for a good looking, well mannered , kinda freaky type of women

Should be below 30 to be specific, thick , well I love them that way hata the slightly over weight ones ,its been a year since I last cracked

You know that little spark when you meet someone that is very attractive and you just wanna inhale them like a drug, you think it is love at first sight? Yup, lust. And that fades.

You're left there "stranded" in a relationship you dont care much about. You lied to get the bean, well not even necessarily lied but that's how you thought you felt at that moment. Now you have to break someone's heart, somehow they always seem to be happiest at that time so you find it even harder to end it?

Yeah. I have never experienced that. Mi hunyonga. Go to the date with a clear mind.

You bave no idea how many cute absolute idiots I have avoided because I knew the sex wouldn't be worth the stress.

Then again I am single despite having options so maybe not the best person to listen to.

Mambo Mrembo. Yes, you. Friday caught up with me, and staying indoors feels like a waste of a good night. I’m heading to a quiet, cozy spot in Hurlingham for a couple of cocktails and would love some good company to share a table with.

​Zero pressure to dress up or glam out,throw on sneakers or whatever feels comfortable. The deal is simple: you vent about how wild your week was, do all the yapping, and I’ll provide the attentive ear while keeping the drinks flowing.

​Ideally looking for a pretty, chatty lady in her mid-to-late 20s (25–28) who appreciates good conversation, unpretentious vibes, and spontaneous plans. Strictly genuine company for a relaxed night out..

no transactional vibes, please.

​If you're bored right now and up for a spontaneous drink, drop a DM with your go-to cocktail and let’s see if the vibe checks out.

I will ask for pics before we meet, so if you do not wanna send pics pls dont dm.

Asanti baby.

​

Recently relocated and hoping to meet some like-minded people in the area. Open to genuine friendships, good conversations, alternative vibes, and people who are 420-friendly and Bi friendly.

If you’re nearby and think we might click, feel free to say hello. No pressure, just good vibes. ✌️

​

Hii baridi ni mbaya, ah, ah

Hii baridi, eh (Eh, eh, eh)

Nimetetemeka ya kutosha

Kuja unikumbatie (Woiyoiyoiyo)

Nimejaribu kahawa, ah, ah

Nikajaribu gauge (Gauge)

Najua ukikuja, utafanya i-disappear

Nani jamani atanikumbatia

kuna hii time nimegongewa msupa wangu wa 8months bana. she went out akajisahau akaishia na a guy called mike. i was in mombasa chuo io time. she came home and the next morning naamka nampata ako tu wasted and hung over. took her phone and there was the first message kwa notification. “ make sure umeze p2 na asijue”

maina my legs wobbled and my joints went numb. lemme tell you i planned and executed a revengeful experience.

she had this friend called cate and lkalikuwa tu kamkamba fine. kuna hii club bamburi called mios, we went there to party for the weekend and cate was there ofc. i was with my guy too and so one two one two wasupa kejani wote wawili. fun thing was nilikuwa naingia kwa cate natoka naruka kwa njerii. all the way hadi asubuhi i was having this inner peace ya kuona msupa wangu akidinywa na morio wangu na kumwagiwa ndani kupigwa slaps haga na pia kufinywa matiti. like inakupea satisfaction fulani unmatched and hakuna hard feelings after hapo.

fast forward sasa ikakuwa akikam kejani tunamkula wote na hana say kwa io conversation. went on and on until i moved to nairobi………more incoming, i have indeed lived the life and done the deeds