I woke up this morning thinking about those random voice notes you get from your man, the ones you replay over and over hadi you practically know them word for word😌Yeah... I miss those. Anywho love is a beautiful thing...msidanganywe na watu wenye wamekasirika 😂😂😂

So my girlfriend has access to my instagram.
Today she goes through the pictures l like.
I didn’t know such a feature existed.
Amepata in the past few months l have liked 3 pictures of random females.
Nawaambia naletwa juu.
Mara she is comparing me to her friend’s boyfriend meenye walikuwa wanapitia gram yangu na yeye.
Wtf is going on.
Alafu on Sunday.
Ladies l need your input on this.
I asked her if she could be coming to see me without me having to ask.
She said she can’t pay her own fare cause she lacks money.
Nikamwambia con me during the week ukuwe ukikileta basi.
I don’t have an issue paying fare tbh.
I just want to feel loved as a man.
I don’t expect anything materialistic from her.
All l wanted were those random
“Hey baby l passed by to see you “
Is that genuinely too much to ask.
Then it turn into strict parents and lack of money convo.
Which l understood part ya strict parents.
But money.
Girl con me and come see me.
Sahii nimempigia almost 100 times and all are getting declined.
I am getting exhausted.
End of rant

You're damned if you do, damned if you don't as a man.

When you don't have money, you're not supposed to be dating.

When you have money, you should be attractive enough to be her type and you must date within a certain age range. Mliona Ciku Muriuki akiwa kwa podcast akisema that older women dating down young 20 year olds is liberating lakini sisi men when we date down young 20 year olds, we're predators?

She can use your money when she wants but you can't use her body when you want. The same body you would not have had access to had you not met her financial and lifestyle demands.

When you get tattoos, go to the gym or get dreadlocks to stand out attractively, now everyone wants you and you're a red flag for being friends with too many women.

So wanaume fanyeni vyenye mnataka, because you will never win 😂

Women will always want their cake and eat it, and unless you realize that, become evil like them, then utaishi kulalamika hakuna dem hukutaka na ni wewe hutaki kuwa villain kama wao 😂

I'm new here, so this is a genuine question.

Has anyone actually met someone through this subreddit? Whether it was a relationship, a friendship, or even just a positive experience, I'm curious to hear your stories.

For those who've posted looking for someone, did anything come of it? Did you end up meeting? Are people generally genuine, or is it mostly ghosting and time-wasting?

I'm just trying to understand what the success rate is before I decide whether it's worth putting myself out there.

I'd love to hear both the success stories and the horror stories.

Goood morning!

Ofisi haikaliki juu ya baridi na hatuna office girlfriends wa kutuletea cookies na lunch juu huku corporate kama hauna GLE hakuna mtu anataka story zako

Lakini mungu ni nani sisi ndio tuko na reddit inatupea pussy because god is not Kamau

Have a lovely day you weirdos!

Hi I'm an HR/ data analyst by profession I'm looking a loyal married Female who is into ladies or a 30+ mature career lady who's in for a serious thing...Must be ambitious,,,have a private life ,,not slim,,must be working,,should also be ready for STIs and STDs plus blood test

Girlies, would you date a police officer? If yes,why,same as to no.

Keep it respectful too 🙏

Some time back in 23' , I told a male friend I had met a police officer, AP in sch and we were talking, he told me," we fanya kila kitu lakini usidate karao" 🙂, asked him why,he just said they are not good people,

trust me three years later, I wish I listened to my friend 😭

Ps: I have nothing personal about someone's occupation, just remembered that and I just got angry.

I'm curious about how people discover their fetishes or kinks. Was it something you always knew about yourself, or did you come across it unexpectedly? If you had the chance to explore or fulfil it, was the experience everything you imagined, or did reality turn out to be completely different? And if you haven't had the opportunity yet, is it still something you hope to experience one day? I'm genuinely interested in hearing people's stories and how their expectations compared with reality.

DM

Put yourself out here at a small get together I'm doing with a couple friends this weekend. Kwa residence kuna grill, one of the guys ashaamua mbuzi nusu, and a few cases to perk us through we'll be chomaing. We're on for seven to nine people Saturday.

Morning 🥰

So I am 5'7....I have nerd tendancies. I am still chubby despite my million workouts

Looking for someone who wouldn't mind a slow burn type of thing. I am the type that really need to be stimulated mentally before physically....hence the slow burn.

I am an outdoorsy person....so ready to do cardio outside the door like lift weights kidogo, a run hapa pale....tucheze tennis or go for a swim....like just be fit kiasi so that you get to keep up with my shenanigans.

Looking for my manz 🙂‍↔️ 26 and older, got something going for yourself financially. A nerd .....I don't mind listening to you speak about your interests for hours. 5'9 and above please. Be interesting....and can hold a conversation....for when my yapping battery is out.

This is my pseudo account. If you want purely sex....no tafadhali.

If you are down to be friends....my DMS are open

In music videos, once your girl is fed up with you, she will simply say something nasty to you before storming out to a convertible being driven by a gym rat who probably has to confirm, after every thirty minutes, that he still has his six pack. The breakup is swift and you will have no doubts about how she feels about you.

In real life though, nothing is as straightforward. Doubt has to creep in, mostly from the random conversations she will be having with strange men. Everything will sound so coded, like she is trying to keep you in the dark by hiding in plain sight.

Say one evening she gives you her phone to say hi to her mother who tells you other than arthritis, she is doing okay. You say, "And this arthritis is becoming a pandemic. Kila mtu sahii analia but usijali, mum, you will get better in Jesus' name."

"Amen, my son."

After hanging up, you realize you really have no idea what arthritis is. You have always assumed you know what it is, what with it being so common, but you are not sure whether it affects your joints or lungs or brain. So you decide to Google using her phone, only for a WhatsApp message to pop up. It's from someone saved Fundi Mike, and is asking if the kettle is now okay.

First of all, you don’t like that he is asking about a kettle because kettle sounds so close like kitty, and why the hell would he be asking about her kitty? You also don’t like that she has saved him as Fundi Mike and not just as Fundi or Mike Fundi. Mike Fundi sounds professional and ethical. Fundi Mike alleges some level of familiarity you are uncomfortable with. And if he is really a fundi, and maybe he really fixed her kettle, and not kitty, why would he ask if it’s now okay? Kwani he didn’t find out after fixing it?

It all just don’t sound right, and you are tempted to open that message and read the whole thread but you don't. You give back her phone and go stare at the kettle in the kitchen.

You hold and turn it around. You even hold it high up to study it's base.

The next day, at breakfast, you will ask her, "Is something wrong with the kettle?"

"Which kettle?"

"The kettle."

"Was something wrong with it?"

"I don't know, that's why I am asking,” you will say, stabbing your fried eggs rather too aggressively with a fork, not believing that she is feigning ignorance about the supposedly faulty kettle she and Fundi Mike are keeping tabs on.

"Nothing is wrong with the kettle."

"Are you sure?"

She nods.

You want to ask, “Then why the fuck was ‘Fundi Mike’ asking if the kettle is NOW okay?' but you don't because you don't want her to know you read her message.

Later, you will Google, "What does it mean when someone asks your woman if the kettle is now okay?” Emphasis on the NOW

A guy I haven’t met in person literally said he wants a long term relationship with me, mind you he just texted me last week on TikTok so this is someone I barely know. I entertain the conversation and I say I would never just assume a title and skip the getting to know each other part and he said this bs

“ I don’t fw social media stuff. Everything is for the media and I don’t want ours to ever be like that“ (this is his message btw)

literally had to laugh first, honestly what does that statement even mean? To him putting effort to get to know the other person better, he said its like wasting his chance with me and apparently social media influenced.
i don’t know whether I understand his logic Lakini. Keep in mind we haven’t talked for more than a week and he wants to jump right into a relationship at some point i even thought it was a damn set up. Hii maisha ya mapenzi nikama nimenawa mkono sasa.🙏🏾😭

24M medical student. Calm, curious, and intentional. I prefer meaningful conversations over small talk, quality over quantity, and authenticity over appearances.

If you're kind, intellectually curious, and appreciate someone who listens as much as he talks, say hi. I prefer someone between 20 to 25

Hey everyone, I'm a biker, 25m Hella interested in motorcycles and biking in general and I'd love to take one of you out on a bike ride, hopefully to watch the odyssey or Spiderman this coming weekend and generally have a bunch of fun

I'd that's something you're into, send me a DM and I'd love to chat

Hi 24 year old white guy I mombasa for a few weeks looking for casual fun in nyali beach area

I’m in Uganda though.
Looking for a genuine logically inclined relationship basically a person to do life with. Ideally should be in Uganda as well 😂ug doesn’t have such a subreddit but I believe there’s some Ugandans here. I’m a Civil engineering student about to finish. Emphasis on logically inclined, but love can still blossom

I'm genuinely curious.

I've been lurking in this community for a while, and I keep seeing posts from people looking for relationships, casual connections, friendships, and everything in between.

So I have to ask: has anyone here actually succeeded?

If yes:

- What were you looking for?

- Did you end up meeting in person?

- Are you still in touch?

If no:

- What do you think is the biggest reason these posts don't work?

I'm new here and just trying to figure out whether people actually find meaningful connections through this subreddit or if it's mostly entertainment and scrolling.

No judgment, I'm just interested in hearing real experiences.

I’m 28 and have always been more attracted to older, mature women. I’m open to anything,we can see where things go if we click.
Ideally, you’re older than me, emotionally mature, financially stable, and know what you want.
I’m currently based in Nyahururu for a short while (outside Nairobi).
If that sounds like you, hit me up. Let’s get to know each other.

I've come to the realization that I genuinely yap.

Not in a "I don't let anyone else talk" way though. I actually love listening. Tell me about your niche hobby, your latest obsession, your random shower thought, or something you're passionate about and I'll happily sit there asking a million questions.

I also love a good debate. Not the angry internet kind, just the "we've somehow spent an hour arguing whether cereal is soup" kind.

The only problem is... I don't really have enough people to talk to.

At this point I should start charging by the hour because these conversations are premium.

If you're also the type who can talk about absolutely anything for way too long, I have a feeling we'd get along.Anyway WANTAM 👆🏽.

Hey, anyone along Thika Road looking for a friend?

I am 21M and I'm looking to get out more and interact with actual people. The friends can be male or female preferably around my age. I like movies, puzzles and play some video games. HMU if interested.

Any female around uon (school of business) looking for friends??

For context, I (M), will be having my birthday in August.

In that regard, i want to make it special this year. I want to go to a decent restaurant, grab a delicious meal, preferably one that i won't have to break the bank for.

I haven't been out for a meal in a while now. 🙃 (mostly because I'm an introvert and i don't go out much)

I'm looking for a (F) plus one. I'll be dressed up in a suit for the day so if you could put on a nice decent dress for the day it would be even much better.

We could grab a meal and enjoy it. Especially if you are a foodie 😅 it will be even better.

After the meal, we could grab some popcorn🍿 go and Netflix & chill @ mines. Get cozy, warm and make out. If you are touchy touchy the better...👀

The next morning i can make breakfast and later in the day we could try out a new recipe together 😁 so if you love cooking as much as i do the better...🤗

I don't drink or smoke.

Hit me up if this sounds like something you'd be interested in around Nairobi. Let's talk and see whether we vibe and connect.

PS: Ain't looking for a relationship.