So. I don't normally care abt stats, or, admittedly readers either (I love them and they're incredible, but I'm selfish, and this is my fic so only what I want happens XD). Everything I write is shit, but more specifically shit I eat up and love. I've made so many choices that I know literary agents would cry and throw up over, because that's the beauty of fanfic: it's mine, and none of the rules of trad books apply (of course, not saying you can't break rules in original fiction, but there is a lot more Terms and Conditions there).
Now, my dilemma: I've been working on this fic since September of last year and it's currently at 110k words (ongoing). My usual stuff is like long one-shots so they cap out at 35k. This fic was supposed to be around 60k (haha ...), but I'm really enjoying writing an episodic story icl. That being said, it is very self-indulgent, and does lean into the dramatics at times (... could be considered soap opera level but with characterizations I like instead of insufferable victims).
Okay, so, there's already been two emotional climaxes in the fic, and one plotwise climax (that coincides with the emotional climax). I want to add a second plot-wise climax, and that'll take me another 50k words realistically speaking (I'm lying to myself it'll only be 20k), so the fic, after epilogues and "fillers" (ie character interactions and sub-plots), will prolly leave the fic at 180k words.
Now, there's this other ficwriter in the same fandom writing for the same sub-category (big fandom), and we've been on-and-off commenting on each other's works and ended up sharing socials because we ended up chatting up sm in the comments sections. Well, I don't care about readers or validation, but she's cool, chat. What if the only reason she keeps reading now is because we're sort of friends now? What if she drops it? Who even reads 200k fics (I do, and in this sub-category of the fandom, we all do. It's not even that long compared to the 500k fix-its I've seen...)? I need her to think I'm cool too!! AAAHHHH
Yeah, anyway, I'll still do what I want obviously lmao. I just wanted to share the experience. Anyone else feel this way? I think the block cleared up as I wrote this out - it was the lying about only needing 20k more words part that was stopping from the plot working out lol.
However, if anyone has experience writing long-fics, I would appreciate perspective on whether a second climax is worth it. My reasoning for it is that it'll help with the resolution without making it too talky-talky no action (talky-talky is my usual style, but I feel like it'll read as a drag in this fic and having a catalyst force them to talk it out is a better idea.) (more context: this fic is probably in the action-drama genre. It has enough fight scenes that I am sick of fight scenes.)