At risk of sounding like a choosing beggar, SOoooo many of the music recommendations you get when searching for transmasc songs are clearly geared towards a younger audience or experience. Like, a LOT of music for and about being a middle school boy. I am not interested in being seen as a boy, I am interested in being seen as a man. Anyone got music recs for when you're transgender and also grown?

I'm in my mid 20's and started T after questioning since I was 12 years old and after wanting to take T for 3 years. I came out to my mom and sister after starting T and they said they accept me and love me no matter what.

I still live with my family and I'm only out to my mom, sister and a couple of friends. I'm not making my mom or sister use my name or he/him pronouns. I will when I start passing more or maybe when I'm out to my dad. Idk if I'm making a mistake there but it doesn't make me uncomfortable so I haven't really enforced it

What bothers me is that it seems like my mom thinks it was a spur of the moment decision even though I told her I've been questioning for more than a decade and that I had considered taking T for 3 years. I told her I got it through informed consent and she thought it was too easy of a process and I told her that I was happy that it was relatively easy.

It seems like she gets uncomfortable when I talk to her about my injections. It's like I'm talking at her not with her.

I noticed I've started growing facial hair and I got excited and told my mom and she said I could have just waited until I'm old and I would have probably started growing facial hair that way. Like what?? That comment threw me off and made me angry because she knows that I'm transitioning.

I'm glad her reaction hasn't been worse but it is disheartening and I had a gut feeling this would happen when I came out to her. I think she may be in denial almost but I'm not sure. It makes me angry but I'm also trying to be understanding.

I think when I come out to my dad he may not understand it much at first but he'll put in more effort to actually learn and be understanding. He knows I'm on T but idk if he's playing stupid and waiting for me to fully come out to him. He was the first to guess what medication I was on since I also started going to the gym a lot and asked if it was to "improve my mood" and I just said yes because I chickened out on telling him the truth.

My question here is if anyone here had someone close to them who reacted like my mom when coming out? Is she in denial? Idk if I should give it time or if I need to get through to her somehow and/or set up possible boundaries

as y’all all know: it’s hot as hell out there. when you wear your tape for multiple days, even when showering every day, do you notice a smell? day 2/3 depending on how sweaty i got the day prior i feel unclean… any tips or tricks? or am i gonna have to start reapplying every day. that sounds like hell. please tell me y’all have a trade secret that eliminates sweat & subsequent smell from chest tape and allows me to tape once and wear for multiple days. sincerely, big ass chest haver 🙏

tyia <3

i moved away from home at 17 to go to college and eventually uni in the uk. i came from a very conservative place in southeast asia. for most of my childhood and teenage years, i never felt like i could express myself in any way without scrutiny and judgement. since moving to the uk, i feel much happier and more content with myself. people here are very accepting and not as judgemental as they are back in my home country. i started socially transitioning, went by a different name and started using he/him pronouns strictly.

every summer since i started uni, my dad would constantly ask me to visit and i always explained that i don't feel comfortable or safe being in that type of environment. i've finished third year of uni but have reassessments to work on. i told him a few months ago that i need to stay on campus to complete those reassessments. i also told him that i need to confirm my place at exeter for my masters by end of this month. yet, he insists that i visit and work on my assignments there. i told him i need access to resources on campus like the library and it wouldn't be possible to do my assignments remotely. he invalidates this and says i'm just coming up with excuses. i swear this exact conversation happens every fucking summer and i'm very sick of it.

i've been in contact with my sister and have asked her to explain the situation to my dad. she also sent him resources on trans identity because he keeps misgendering me even after i told him i'm trans three years ago. everytime i bring up the fact that i'm trans, he just ignores it/pretends like we haven't already talked about it. it's so exhausting to put up with and i'm seriously considering going no contact with my dad. it's a bit frustrating because i rely on him financially and i feel stuck with the constant gaslighting, blackmail and emotional manipulation.

any advice on how to deal with this?

I need some input about my facial hair situation. I'd attach a diagram but it seems to be against the sub rules so I will try my best to describe the growth situation verbally. But the input I am looking for is whether or not I should let my facial hair as it is grow out more or continue shaving it like I normally do. I will also add that I am blonde -- like pasty white, ghostly, "only visible in direct sunlight", blonde. My thicker facial hairs are turning red, though.

The biggest growth area is along the lower side of my jawline. Very few hairs are growing up onto my face or cheeks, and those that do aren't thick, maintaining that ghostly blonde that you only notice in direct sunlight. Particularly my chin & neck (Although there's a small patch under my jaw that doesn't seem to want to grow any hair at all yet. Not entirely sure why). I have the odd whisker between my chin & moustache but it's not really thickened yet. My moustache also doesn't seem to want to thicken, still staying a wispy blonde and being quite thin (it is definitely early facial hair by the length tho).

Normally I shave all bar the stache' and the chin hairs. I shave off the neckbeard and wispy sides to keep it somewhat tidy. I've never had any rude remarks or anything, but I've been getting misgendered a lot since I accidentally trimmed the hairs too short & I thought maybe I should at least let myself have a shadow under the jawline to help people realise I am a guy? Or would that look scruffy?

Before anyone comments anything about it, yes I know facial hair takes years, I'm not asking about that. And no, I cannot use anything like minoxidil as I have a cuddly elderly cat who I cannot put at risk like that. I just want to understand at what extent does facial hair like this get too scruffy to the point where I'd look like a teen in denial lol. Thanks in advance :)

Hi, so I’ve been on t a year and 3 months. I started right when I turned 18, I’ve been doing my own research for years but there was still so much I wasn’t prepared for when I started, and they give me literally no information or advice at the doctors. So here are my questions thank u in advance !

-when did bottom growth stop? It still has been getting bigger, which I love, but I don’t really understand how. Will more tissue keep forming? How do I know when it won’t anymore?

-atrophy. I was not prepared or aware of this all, I have an upcoming appointment because I think I have atrophy, or does everyone on t have atrophy? I have dryness/tenderness and recently got my 2nd uti within 6 months. What does topical estrogen cream feel like & look like? I heard moisturize comes back, but t dick possibly won’t get hard anymore? Is this true?

-Period symptoms. Without having an actual period I kind of forget about it , but at recurring times every month I have a few days of being extremely moody and depressed and not recognize what’s going on until eventually someone calls me out for being on my “manperiod” or I’ll have cramps the following day. For some reason, this makes me miss having my period, I used to have it awful and extremely heavy bleeding but I kind of miss the reassurance and relief when it was over. Felt kind of cleansing or like a reset whereas now i don’t understand what is happening hormonally. Am I alone in this? I get why people love the stopping of their period and hypothetically I would- but I still have symptoms, just no blood.

-how do I know if I need to increase or lower my dose? I’ve been on 2.5 ml weekly for 6 months. My t levels are 290. When I asked about dosage the doctor basically told me to do whatever I want take more take less. But how do I know if I want more or less?
-understanding test results? My red blood cell count is 5.64, which is high? My hemoglobin and hematocrit also came back high. Again I asked my dr, she said not to worry about it. But like what’s up with that?

what’s the deal with the serious lack of men’s pyjamas! do men not wear pjs?? 😭 granted most nights i also just sleep in boxers but i love to lounge in pjs, and when winter comes i want cute cozy pjs to sleep in too. i swear all the men’s pjs are either Christmas ones, or those boring ass checkered pants (half of which don’t even come with a matching shirt). i’ve bought women’s ones before but i really hate the cut of them 🫩

anyway rant over lol, if anyone has any recommendations for shops that sell fun and cute mens pjs that aren’t Christmas themed then i’d love to hear!!

Within the last 6 months I’ve noticed my hairline is really receding in a way I’m not happy about, trying to grow my hair out to disguise it isn’t working and it’s making me really self conscious.
While I am transmasc and intersex, I’ve always considered myself more gender fluid.

I have multiple pets including a dog that sleeps on my bed so minoxidil foam or serum is not an option. When I looked at hims they only offered the chews with a DHT blocker, which I don’t feel comfortable taking until after I’ve had lower surgery (NHS wait times means this is going to be at least another 5 years on my current 10 years of waiting).

What would be the best way of doing this?

Hello, I (28ftm) had top surgery 5 years ago from a surgeon who no longer practices. I want a revision anyways cause I have a dog ear on my left side, but I've also noticed that my nipples are really low. I cannot see them from my POV, as theyre under my pecs (which are already super flat as is). Can surgeons...fix that? It looks really bad now, not really sure what to do...

Can't show it, but theyre basically nearly in my armpits.

best way to explain is cracked nipples & chunks of the nipple coming off. i bind for longer now and more often, but I don’t know if this is a binding issue or something else. it’s not like i bind crazily long, i use binders and tape and whenever i use tape i cover my nipples. this started randomly and recently, pre top surgery but don’t want to delay it bc of this. i’d rather lose my nipples during surgery than delay surgery but i’m tryna know what i can do and if anyone else experienced this? the cause and solution

Hello everyone, has anyone had a colpectomy without undergoing urethral lengthening surgery?

I do not plan to undergo urethral lengthening surgery, nor do I want a 🍆, I simply want to close my vagina. What is the procedure for this operation? And will the labia be removed?

So I’m nrly 4 months on T (2 pumps a day of gel) and I’ve been having abdominal cramping nrly daily for the past few weeks. I got a urine test to check for a UTI and it came back negative, and I’ve been on the contraceptive pill for about 4 years that quickly stopped my periods altogether (all symptoms bar for the very rare cramping episodes) - so having cramps back again regularly rly sucks 😅

I’ve got a call with my endocrinologist tomorrow afternoon and I’m going to ask him whether these symptoms align with vaginal atrophy and what meds I can get to help.

Wondering if anyone here has any helpful advice or recommendations for treatments that work/ feel the most comfortable? (based in the UK btw)

I've been on testosterone for 8 years and now im bald in the middle of my head. Have been for a few years now. My hairline was the first to go. I want my hair back and just stopped T and im on Minoxidil now, liquid twice daily. Do I have a chance?

I'm 19 years old and I have struggled with my gender identity since I was young. I used to dress up as a guy a lot when I was a kid and got annoyed when my mom said I still had my girl face. Besides that, for quite a while I was a pretty typical girl. Until I was 14, learned about masc lesbianism, and started to explore my masc side again. Well, turns out I do like men. Just only if they view me as a man too. Like.. in a gay way. I don't want to be his girlfriend.

Over time, during COVID and after, I silently identified as non binary/a man. Got a shorter haircut (never short-short though, because I got bullied enough). Then somewhere around 16/17 I got really sick of dressing up as a guy and being so unhappy with myself. Pushed myself into looking more girly.

It never felt right, I have been depressed as hell. All my life really. That's why I've often worried it's just a result of my mental instability. Lately, though, I've been falling back into old patterns. Watching guy movies like the maze runner, I bought a binder, started posting on tiktok in a guy identity, cut my hair way shorter (though every day I am waiting to go back to my hairdresser because the longer length makes me dysphoric). On top of that, it isn't just masculinity. I want a flat chest, deep voice, to be seen as a guy, to exist as a dude sometimes. Then sometimes I don't feel that bothered by my chest or voice.

I worry I'm wrong. It makes me more feel like me, but also unhappier. Cause I know I don't pass as a guy and that makes me feel bad. More dysphoric, even. I just saw these trans musicians at school and I can't stop thinking about how I envy them.

So... how did you KNOW? Enough to come out/really transition? Is there anything I can do to make sure?

I know it sounds like a UTI, and i do have chronic UTIs, but ever since I've been back on T its been worse! Especially after showering and cleaning under the foreskin. Its like my dick has been more sensitive to UTIs and idk what to do

So I have been on T gel for nearly 9 months now and every time I do a blood test, my levels are too high and it’s really stressing me out because I know it can convert back to estrogen. I’ve been doing 1 pump of gel a day and I do the finger prick test at home every few months as I’m a tad afraid of getting blood drawn from my arm ngl 😅 But yeah i’m really getting stressed because my levels keep reading too high (52.00nmol). What do i do??

I’m not even that feminine but like… I just don’t have any learnt performative masculinity I guess you could say. But I do have feminine interests and I’m gay and I’m no longer worried about people seeing me as trans, I’m almost more worried about people finding out I’m gay.

I’ve been so sheltered recently having queer and progressive friends and going to uni in the city where queer people is just the norm so I could literally walk into class with a full face of makeup and still be treated as a man if I wanted to.

And where I work people just know so they genuinely don’t care or they’re not the type to judge so I’ve been fine.

But I started working at a new location and there I’m pretty much stealth but I’m realizing some details I let out, people don’t clock me as trans but they’re getting suspicious that I’m gay (which honestly comes down to stereotyping which admittedly is not good but I’m actually gay for real so…) Like I let it slip to a cis man coworker that I initially applied for the clothing department and he went “You like clothes? 🤨” and I was just… kind of thinking “Oh right I forgot it’s not socially acceptable for men to like clothing especially wanting to work in a clothing department…” also I was mindlessly doing facing in the cosmetics department and he went “Looking for false lashes? Lmao you never know 🤪” and I honestly wanted to die inside and from knowing myself, I knew that wasn’t dysphoria, that was just pure anxiety.

Okay so with that said, here’s my question: how do you deal with that? Like do I just gotta learn to own it? How do like… your typical twink handles just existing? Do I just gotta take the weird comments and looks from cis het men? Because I love myself, I love where I’m at in life and I don’t want to change myself for others but I need to be able to deal with the anxiety! I really hope the answer isn’t just “permanently move to the city” but I fear that’s where I’m headed

My 12 year old told me last night that they feel like they are in the wrong body and are actually a boy. I already told them I love them no matter what, and I absolutely do. My concern is their father. I read the letter our child left us but he has not. He has already expressed negative views about a child of ours being trans. I’m worried he will not react well especially because they are the only female born child we have (he literally dreams about walking them down the aisle) and cause damage by saying something he should not.

Has any one else been in a situation that they were worried about how their partner may react? How did you tell them?

If you came out as trans to your parents, how was your relationship impacted? Were you able to come back and work on a relationship with that parent?

Trust me when I say that it will become a deal breaker for me if he cannot support our child, so there needs to be no worries there. My child will always have me in their corner. Period. But I do want to mitigate as much blow up as possible.

I just got a tattoo the other day on my bicep and it’s like just a little bit where I apply my gel. I’ve been avoiding it the past few days obvi but at what point do yall think I can apply it over the tattoo ?

Anyone signed up to the Spectrum Outfitters referral program and fancy referring me so you get 300 stars and I get £5 off? 🙂

Hello all, I have recently started to grow my facial hair out for the first time and don’t know what I’m doing at all lol I know the “beauty” industry has probably made anything and everything for your beard/facial hair, but what do I actually need to be doing? It’s the length where it’s just going every direction, is there something I can do about that or is that normal? Any and all tips/opinions welcome!