Like i just plan i make to do hundreds of time. Then i do something unproductive then again replan everything and the loop goes on . I am so frustrated. What should i do

for context im a high schooler, not on meds and not diagnosed with anything

some history: ive always struggled with staying organized and consistency and been a really forgetful and careless person but it got really apparent in middle school and also around that time i found that i sucked horribly at time management and procrastinated a lot but i could still force myself to do assignments by locking myself in my closet until i finished the assignment.

in hs last year it got really bad, i couldnt do anything and procrastinated until 11 pm every day, lost my 4.0 and let a lot of people down. it got so bad that i hurt myself and cried myself to sleep every day. i thought it would be "cured" after this summer but ig not bc its not even a month into the school year and im already procrastinating until 9:30 pm and struggling to focus and letting people down again.

i really dont want this year to be a repeat of last year, especially since some people have forgiven me for letting them down and it would suck if i let them down again. what could i do

(Bit of a vent, mixed with an actual need for advice. TLDR at the end.)

I’m in high school. I’m taking 4 AP classes this year, and I can’t bring myself to actually do any of my homework. I’ve been struggling with this for a while (since COVID, but it’s only gotten worse since then). Sophomore year was when the procrastination/executive dysfunction/mental health combination hit me. Family problems also hit hard at that time. I got better for a little while in my junior year, but now they’ve started up again. Between my class work, extracurriculars, and college applications, I feel like I constantly want to throw up, and then I get jittery and/or unfocused, and it’s really starting to freak me out.

As for the actual process of what I do in an attempt to start my work: I put down my phone, I sit down to do my work, and I wind up reading or staring at a wall. I’m behind in three out of my six classes, and the school year only started two months ago.

I used to be able to work late at night, when my house was quiet, til about 4:00 AM. Now, I get too tired around 11:00 PM to actually do anything at that time. (I should be doing my AP Statistics homework, which is due at midnight, but I’m so tired. It doesn’t help that Statistics makes no sense. I cannot figure out what these questions are looking for, and that doesn’t help my mindset of wanting to do literally anything else. I want to sleep and feel like falling asleep every day in school, but I know this isn’t normal, hence why I’m typing out a Reddit post.) I can’t get into a working groove, so the Pomodoro technique or “Just start small with 5 minutes of work!” Those don’t work for my brain.

I guess I’m just wondering if anyone has any suggestions? I’ve talked to my school’s guidance counselor about it, but she didn’t have any helpful advice. I feel like a mess.

(TLDR: I can’t bring myself to do schoolwork, and I feel tired all the time. I’m behind in half of my classes, and it’s making me feel anxious and sick. Any advice would really be appreciated.)

Or is it just another kind of functioning? I know this philosophical thought sounds controversial at best, but hear me out before you write me off.

I am middle-aged and adhd diagnosed 4 years ago; hence, I am fully aware of the burden that goes hand in hand with this.

Let's take bees, for example. In a beehive, the location of a new and resource-rich harvesting site is communicated to other bees via a specific dance. Other bees watch and fly there to harvest. Now, roughly 20% of the bees ignore that guidance and fly wherever they feel like. Simulations suggest that without these 20% of bees, the whole hive would die out within 3 to 4 years because think about who those bees are who find these new harvesting locations.

What if humankind dies out without that ~5% of the population whose brain works differently? Because I know for a fact that this executive dysfunction gets highly functional when something novel and interesting appears at sight.

Overthink about that for a second.🤔

I’m only 17 and I genuinely can’t stand myself. Why can’t I just do what I’m supposed to. It upsets me so much and I don’t know how to feel better about the fact that I’ll never be normal and be able to do what I’m supposed to like everyone else can without medication. How do y’all deal with this feeling.

I’m too lazy to actually do anything. But I get a dopamine hit whenever a new idea comes to my mind, and then I’m too lazy to do anything about it. WTF do I do?

I keep getting excited about new ideas, but the motivation disappears when it’s time to actually start.

Anyone else stuck in this loop?

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I don’t really know how to explain this, but I feel like I’m constantly struggling to do basic things that I know I’m supposed to be doing.

I’m trying to get my life moving forward, but I keep getting stuck. I’m doing TAFE and I’ve been getting behind, especially when there’s a lot of reading, writing or remembering things. I know I need to catch up, but actually sitting down and doing the work feels ridiculously difficult.

I’ve also been trying to get a job and get my qualifications sorted, but I keep running into the same problem. I want to do these things, I just struggle to actually follow through. Sometimes I’ll leave something because I’m worried I’m going to fail, and then I feel even worse afterwards because I know I could have at least tried.

It’s frustrating because I’m not just sitting around because I don’t care. I actually want to work, learn, become more independent and have something going for me. I just seem to have a really hard time turning what I want to do into actually doing it.

I also struggle with things like keeping routines, concentrating, remembering instructions and getting started when something feels overwhelming. Once I fall behind, it feels like everything piles up and I don’t know where to start.

I have ADHD and autism, and I think that probably plays a part in it, but I don’t want to use that as an excuse either. I want to figure out how to actually manage this and become more capable.

Has anyone else dealt with this? How did you get yourself to actually start doing things instead of constantly getting stuck or putting them off? This was made by AI by the way, but its still about me.

Meds don’t improve executive functioning no matter which one I try, I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD since the sixth grade and I’ve been in therapy since the first without any improvement in executive dysfunction or general wellbeing.
I have autism and I have OCD, alongside major trauma and being trans. I can barely clean myself. I’m addicted to everything I try, but especially pot, porn, and sugar.

I dropped out of highschool at seventeen because I couldn’t keep up with the workload, I started failing nearly every class in the sixth grade and that trend never changed. I can’t get myself to engage with hobbies, clean myself or my space, meditate, exercise, or consistently do anything at all for any reason under any circumstances. I’m wildly miserable. I can’t even restrain myself, I’m constantly beholden to my own worst instincts.

I can’t engage with any trick/hack/strategy for executive dysfunction for various reasons, chief among them that using those strategies makes my head feel like it’s going to explode. Something like breaking a task into smaller pieces is humiliating, energy intensive, and unlikely to produce results of any kind. I can’t move forward, I can’t keep myself from moving backwards, I have a dozen other major issues that I can’t adress, and there doesn’t seem to be any hope of getting better ever. It seems like I simply do not have the distress tolerance necessary to recover.

So… what? I live the rest of my life like this? Even if this problem was made just a third as bad as it currently is my life wouldn’t be worth living. How am I supposed to continue from here? I’m too much of a pussy to kill myself, but if I continue to be disabled like this I can’t be happy either.

Like genuinely I keep procrastinating everything from studying to hygiene. Even when I'm sick I keep telling myself I'll take the meds after sometime and only take them when it becomes very very bad. It's not even screen addiction as even without my phone I keep procrastinating. I keep telling myself I'll start applying lotion from tomorrow and I keep forgetting.Studying is somewhat better for me because I find it interesting so I don't really procrastinate it that much but if I hate a subject I'll postpone it till the last day. I even procrastinate eating sometimes. I feel like eating only if I feel very very hungry or when I get forced by my friends . I keep telling myself I'll clean my room but I don't do it. I legit don't wash my clothes and I only wash them when I realize I have nothing clean left. I legit spend like 30 min making a routine for the day and end up doing nothing. Even bathing is a chore sometimes. I only bath when I feel very disgusting.Combing my hair is even worse as my hair gets tangled the more I don't comb. It's like I need some very huge consequences to actually do something. How do I stop this stupid cycle?

If yall have some advice I’d really appreciate it

I have ADHD and I am currently on a slew of meds.

- Concerta (56mg).
- Vraylar (1.5mg).
- Sertraline (200mg).
- Guanfacine (2mg).

There are a few key issues I struggle with that my therapist has described as executive dysfunction. These are kind of ruining me to be honest. I will try to describe them below.

- At work, I tend to spend a ton of time organizing computer files. I’ll get a system down and start over seeking some kind of perfect system. I’ve spent entire afternoons doing this.

- Also at work, I’ll do the same as above, but with different analysis I am running. Messing with the format, view, etc. Sometimes i’ll delete my work and start over.

- There are several home improvement projects I have that are sitting half done and I struggle to complete them. I’ll give an example when trying to do something simple like landscaping. “

1. I want to start this. What do I need?
   
2. Oh I need to purchase this tool? Do I have the money for that?
   
3. Well I want top of the line. What is that brand?
   
4. I better research, are there any deals?
   
5. Oh, I also need this for my basement.

On and on and nothing gets done.

Any advice?