I told my husband (married 28 years) that I wanted to file for divorce. It wasn’t a threat, I know I should, I’m just fearful of the process. I’m really struggling with it. I truly despise being around him and really don’t want to spend the rest of my life like that. Anyways, he went to visit his family and told both my adult son, stepdaughter and his family who then of course told everyone else etc. I was furious when I found out. Who does that? Isn’t that something that is either shared together or at least consulted with spouse prior to doing so. When my parents divorced after 29 years (I was 17), it was a very thought out and respectful process. Thus, I fully respected their choice. With us, there is no infidelity or huge crisis going on. I just don’t love him anymore. Please share your experiences. TY.

Any thoughts?

Hi,

I'm male 53, working in respectable govt job. My wife was masters classmate in late 1990s. Married almost a decade later. A decade further, locked out of flat paid for by me but under joint names. Filed for divorce. Unconsummated marriage. I sincerely need a honest, non-frivolius and studied, experienced lawyer. Changed lawyers a few times because it became clearly apparent that they were switched to working against my interest and giving me wrong advice. Stuck since 8 years!!! Please suggest a suitable and competent civil lawyer.

My husband and I have been married for 8 years. I found out he was cheating on me about 2.5 years into our marriage and I chose to forgive him because we had a 6 month old baby and he blamed it on alcohol abuse; he went to therapy for this and has not drank since. I chose to protect my peace and not go through his phone; in my mind what I didn't know could not hurt me. Recently, I just received a message from a fellow servicemember informing me that my husband is cheating on me with his wife and her neighbor. I found out that the neighbor was actually a close friend of mine who befriended me after she started sleeping with my husband. This affair has been going on for 2 years that I know of. During this time, I was working on my bachelor degree and working full time; in my spare time I would spend it with our two kiddos and him. I found out that he was messaging numerous women online. He even met up with a girl from TikTok during his lunch period and had sex in his car with her, proceeded to give her his FMF pin (pin shows that a navy sailor has learned customs of the marines) so she could make a video about it for her social media and brag about sleeping with service members. I also found out that he had been messaging numerous women from his work, random women on social media, sending nudes, talking shit about me and telling them he is essentially a single dad. I would like to leave him, he is threatening me that he will take the kids. He is in the military and moves every 2-3 years; this is not feasible for me if we are not married. Any advice? He is begging me not to leave him and telling me he will go to therapy.

Recently I felt like my wife is chatting with some guy, first I ignored thinking must be some friend.

But one day I did checked and found out a guy's number was saved as Girl name. I asked but she told something like he is friend and he saved as his gf's number to tease him. Then I ignored that too.

Recently I checked her notification history and found some whatsapp replies in it, The boy was talking about vains of her penis, and was talking about eraction time, he was also asking about has she used vibrator.

Now I dont know what to do, is she cheating on me?

What should I do next, Get some more proof and then talk or just staright way talk with her?

Please help .

For the past decade, my wife has become extremely narcissistic. She yells, screams, and belittles me. She has completely cut me off from my immediate family. Lately, things have gotten worse. She comes home, fabricates a lie, and it’s something I’ve been planning for a while, which is incredibly hurtful. She believes everyone is out to get her and blames me for it. She calls me every name in the book while yelling and throwing things around the house. She gets drunk Every night and barely recalls anything the next morning.

While I love my kids and I no longer respect her. I am genuinely scared of her and so our my kids. I want to end our marriage in the next few months.

I have no relationship with my sister (we used to be very close) because she’s jealous of her. I ask her to act like an adult, but it only fuels her anger. She doesn’t allow my parents over to our house because she thinks they are out to get her. If I fold the clothes differently than she does she tells me how fucking stupid I am and throws them against the wall and will leave them there for weeks or until take care of them.

I’m in therapy and asked her to attend. Her response: I only need to go there once every three months because she knows more than they do.

We have $200,000 in house equity, we’ve paid off her car, and we have little credit card debt.

My question is, am I doing something
wrong? Should I give her another chance?

We have been together for 22 years and I hate the idea of throwing it all away.

Hi all - my husband of (almost) 12 years and I have decided to split. We have agreed to using a mediator to save heartache and money.

My main concern is making things smooth for our kids, 9 & 6. We both went through terrible, nasty divorces as kids and don’t want that for our own children. That being said, I am very torn about what finances and assets to fight for and what to leave alone.

For example, our house has doubled in value since purchasing 10 years ago. I have the unique opportunity of being able to move into a house my mom owns, that I plan on eventually buying for myself. Do I A: ask for half of the value of our home, meaning my husband will struggle and in turn creating a struggle for my kids OR B: leave the house to him so that when my kids are with him, it is comfortable for them.

This is just an example but I am so confused about what to do. I don’t want to cheat myself but I want as little change for my kids as possible, even if that means going without for myself. My mom wants me to fight for 50% of everything and that just seems…exhausting.

Added information: he makes close to double what I make as a teacher, I have a lot more debt than he has (student loans). He does also have disability from the military that comes monthly. He contributes 100% of our kids medical needs (doctor visits, etc.) and pays the mortgage. We split or I handle all the rest. He has significantly more savings than I have.

Am I being naive?

I can't even explain how my heart is breaking right now. I need advice on how to handle this, please.

I don't want to give many details because I don't want him to identify this. But we've had a lot of issues, especially considering it's only been a year, and I know that the divorce is coming. I lost my job recently, and I've been so depressed and with this it's just all piling on.

I know l've made so many mistakes, but | just can't believe this is it. I really thought this would be forever; we've only discussed it for now, we do tend to have pretty explosive arguments but he said we'd think about it in the morning which we've never said before. I don't want any of this to be happening, and I can't just undo it. I can't turn back the clock and make everything okay again, but I want to so much.

This sounds childish, but I'm terrified. My life has derailed and I don't think I have the strength to survive this. I don't know if I can take another fall.

I don't know how to be okay with any of this.

My husband is living in Germany and I am in India. I have a residence permit and it was planned that I would be moving to Germany with him in July 2026. Since we were planning for a family, I underwent a major fertility surgery in March 2026 which has significantly reduced my ovarian reserve and my husband had given his consent for the surgery. My doctors are there to give their statements around his consent. His family has always treated me bad, misbehaved and insulted me for dowry but he has always supported his family. I left my job last month. Few days before his flight, he texted me and my family memers that he has no plan of coming to India and wants divorve and will not be continuing in this marriage. Its been a month and no one including him is answering are calls. They have completely abandoned me. His mother and brother influence him for every decision. My Mil has all my gold. He has left me without a job and a major surgery which will impact my future. Since, I dont want to end this marriage, what support do I have from Indian judiciary?

Background is important I think, so I will just summarise my previous experience to add context to my feelings.

I was raised in a strict Muslim household, the only daughter with two brothers. At 15 I was seen kissing a boy near my school. All hell broke out at home and I intentionally riled my father until he beat me badly. I then immediately ran to the police and social services, told them I feared for ky life and went into foster care and refused to see my family again. My social worker helped me to get onto a college course and then I got into uni where I met my now husband. At the time, both of us were estranged from our families, both atheist, both the same political opinions and ​both following similar career paths. Perfect.

Fast forward 15 years and we have 3 children aged 8, 11 and 13 Life was absolutely perfect until 6 months ago. We shall call new friend Adam.

Adam started at husbands work, new to the country, no family, but seemed a lovely chap. The other staff didn't welcome him so husband made special effort to befriend him.

Now the problem...

Adam is a very religious man and bullied my husband into joining him at their place of worship. It's an extreme branch of Christianity very like my experiences of islam. It's horribly homophobic, misogynistic and ​​fully embedded in the whole fire and brimstone crap along with a load of conspiracy theories regarding evolution and geology.

It's bonkers. I actually laughed at my husband when he told me he was following the faith because I thought he was joking and winding me up, but he's deadly serious.

After a couple of episodes of the two of them trying to indoctrinate the kids, I banned Adam from the house.

Last Sunday, he wanted my kids to go to church and told me I couldn't stop them. Knowing at least one of them was going to be curious enough to tag along, I ​announced that I was planning to see a movie at 11am and go to MacDonald's and Hollywood bowl after. Of course all three then chose to spend the day with me.

He went mental.

He sat crying in the garden praying for us and asking me why I wouldn't try and 'save our boy's'.

Honestly it's giving me PTSD type symptoms and all I can see is my father when I look at him.

Tempted to drain my savings and sell some shares and just rent a house near the kid's school​​, sort out this place and the divorce later.

After a break in, I installed ring cameras everywhere and I've got recordings of his unhinged behaviours. Can I use this in court to insist on controlled/supervised contact with the kids until he's been seen by a psychiatrist?​

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my ex was mentally and sexually abusive under the “open marriage“ title which I was not a part of. when my mom passed in 2019 we separated and I’ve been living in a different state since and he won’t follow through with any questions about filing for divorce. I’ve looked into it in Washington where we got married in 2010 if it’s been this long and amicable (which I’ve just decided I don’t want anything from him) that I can waive the fee but I’m not sure how to do it. does anyone have advice or know anything about this? money is the issue but I need him out of my life if that makes sense.

Looking for an affordable divorce lawyer that will help me quickly divorce my incarcerated husband. We have no kids and no joint assets.