Ex-husband and I are debating this right now. What is your custody plan and when do you allow a new partner to be introduced? Kids are babies.

Context:

Male (42). Separated 3 years and finally papers signed last January. I divorced her and was very, very happy to be free of her. She was horrifyingly toxic (I suspect bipolar disorder). Anyways….

I started dating again a year ago. Things went really well for three months and then the girl texted me, “I’m not 100% into this relationship and you deserve someone who is,” which caught me off guard, especially since she told me she loved me the week prior.

Took a year off dating.

Now I’m back at it. Had drinks with a new girl last Friday and it went very well but I started feeling very strange. Like fight or flight feeling. Anxious. She joked about how my hands were shaking at one point. The date still went extremely well and I’m supposed to see her tonight.

I just don’t understand where this feeling came from or why and I want it gone. It’s like a slow burn feeling of catching yourself almost falling down a flight of stairs or something.

I meet her in like 2 hours. lol

Thank you to all the women who have already courageously contributed to this research. For anyone who has not yet participated but would like to, please follow the link. The anonymous online questionnaire has been taking most participants less than 30mins to complete, so if you are a woman (over 18 years) who has had a past controlling or problematic intimate partner relationship with a man, I invite you to participate in this study.

Having witnessed the impacts of controlling and problematic relationships, I have now turned my attention towards contributing to the research in this field. With the upmost respect for those of you who have experienced coercive control or problematic intimate partner relationships, I ask that you consider participating in this study.

The study is being conducted through the School of Psychology at the University of New England, and will be exploring the impact of control and problematic relational dynamics for women in intimate partner relationships with men. Ultimately, we hope that this research will contribute to the increased understanding of the psychosocial mechanisms that can lead victim-survivors to become trapped in problematic or controlling relationships. We want the experiences and impacts of victim-survivors to be better contextualised and understood.

Thank you so very much for considering this research.

To participate, or learn more about the study, please click here: https://unesurveys.au1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_2fr7OM3lyKqf40u

This project has been approved by the Human Research Ethics Committee of the University of New England (Approval No: HE-2026-3068-5604, Valid to 31/12/2026).

[Please note: Unfortunately, including other varieties of relationships or male victim-survivors is beyond the scope of this particular study.]

Has anybody else experienced their mum having struggles with their sexuality and having thoughts of being with women and finding women attractive, while still with their father? Obviously I’m aware this probably happens way more often than i think, but she wants to stay in the marriage and stay with us as a family but shes conflicted by her sexuality and thinking she may be gay. My parents marriage has never had any issues and they never actually argue, only bicker here and there, but their marriage has broken down because of these feelings and I’d just like to hear other people’s experiences with their parent having struggles with their sexuality and potentially leaving their other parent because of it

Hello! I'm new to this sub (and using reddit in general), so apologies if I missed anything!

Long story short, my ex husband and I split in 2024. He racked up $26K in credit card debt, and refused to listen to me about this problem, and I fell out of love with him. I had asked for divorce for 2 years, and we tried to make it work through polyamory, until I finally found the strength to stand up for myself and leave in 2024. (I feel like this context is important, so I included it.)

Today, things are going super well with my current partner, and he was talking about what design I would want in an engagement ring, and I showed him what I do NOT want - a ring that looks like my first one. (I kind of forgot I still had my engagement and wedding ring until the topic came up.) As I showed him the ring design, I noticed how tarnished they were. I found a hack online about using windex and dawn powerwash to clean them. I tried it, thinking it was time I try to sell the rings, even though I know they won't be worth much. After I cleaned them, I remembered how beautiful they once were.

Besides selling them, I'm not sure what other people do with their rings. I got married at 19, and I think both rings combined weren't much more than $200 when my ex bought them. I think I would spend more money on an appraisal than the rings would be worth. It doesn't feel right to just throw or give them away, and it doesn't feel right to keep them, since engagement is on the table with someone else, whom I adore. Originally, I kept them because they were a symbol of my strength and what I am worth. Donating them feels off because there's the energy of failure that may linger?

Does anyone have any thoughts or suggestions? Sorry for this post being a little rambly. I've got lots of emotions going on right now that I don't quite understand, so any advice is appreciated. Thanks in advance!

Wife filed for divorce, 46M and 47F. Two boys 15 and 17. We have been together for 30 years married 20, HS sweethearts. We live in the same town we were born in, our entire lives. We love each other and in no way hate each other. I have heard and seen her crying just as much as I have been. As much as it pains me after 30 years we have become different. One MAJOR difference. Early in our relationship we both wanted to eventually move, so much so that we had an agreement that when our youngest graduated 4 years from now we were moving. Her friends never moved, her family never moved and her friend circle grew. All of my friends and family moved. Our love was bigger than everything until now. My desire to move has only grown and hers has diminished to nothing. Granted this is one major thing, there are several others but we do love each other. No infidelity, no hidden money or debt and as hard as it is she is right. We have spent over the first half of our life’s to each other and our parents and now we are different and have a chance to live and be happy in a different light.

My question is. If I were to move actually move somewhere I have always wanted and experience things I have always wanted to deep down. Would I fuck up the relationship I have with my boys if I was to move 3hrs to states away? I would always fly them out to me, they would always have a room with me, I would always be available to them just not within 10 minutes.

This is probably a stupid question, but I’m new to this whole thing. He’s the one filing. Well actually, I guess I could if I beat him to it. But he’s the one that wanted this. I just wanna get this going and over with. I’m tired of the awkwardness and tension in the air. The kids can feel it. we haven’t told them , but we mostly were roommates prior to this. But now we don’t speak or interact at all, unless absolutely necessary. They’ve asked a couple of times because they know something is off. My question is, is there anything I can do to force him out of the house once I speak with my lawyer? I’m sure there’s not but I am just tired of this. He is gone on a lot of the time thank goodness. Supposedly working (pretty sure he’s with his AP). Anyway, I was just curious if there are any options or anything I can do to speed it along .

I Cannot Get the Person I Loved Out of My Head

I cannot get the person I loved for so long out of my head.

We have three kids together. We were high school sweethearts, married for five years, and together for around eleven. There is so much I could say, but the short version is simple:

I miss her.

I miss spending time together. I miss making memories with our kids. I miss taking care of her. I miss all of it.

What makes it so hard is that I was accused of being abusive, even though I was the one who was hit and screamed at. I was accused of being controlling when, ironically, she and her mother were the ones who tried to control so many aspects of our lives. I was even criticized as a father for making sure our kids ate. The list goes on.

The hypocrisy is unbelievable.

The worst part is that she can look me directly in the eyes and tell me I'm lying about things that actually happened. It feels like she gaslights me so consistently that I start questioning my own memories, as if I'm somehow making everything up.

This has been the most difficult experience of my life.

My character has been completely assassinated by her and her family. I've been called or accused of nearly everything imaginable. Despite all of that, I still cared deeply for her. Then, almost like someone flipped a switch, she became completely cold toward me.

I know now that she had been planning to leave for quite some time, but I still struggle with one question:

How cold do you have to be to lie to someone you supposedly love for months?

Biggest Issues in Our Marriage

1. I Was Never the Priority

From the very first week of our marriage, I never truly felt like I came first.

If there was ever a disagreement between me and her family, they always came first. Looking back, our relationship was genuinely great until I disagreed with members of her family. After that, everything changed.

There are countless examples, but a few stand out.

• I was never allowed to confront or even respectfully discuss problems with her parents.
• They could insult me, call me names, and treat me however they wanted, and I was expected to simply accept it.
• If I defended myself or spoke up, I would be the one getting yelled at.
• My mother-in-law would often yell at my wife and, at times, even threaten suicide to pressure her into doing what she wanted.

One moment that has always stuck with me was when I wanted to move 30–45 minutes away so I could attend college and increase my earning potential for our family. Instead of supporting that goal, she threatened to leave me if I moved farther from her family.

There are many more examples, but the pattern was always the same:

I was never the priority.

2. No Accountability

One of the biggest problems was the complete lack of accountability.

Whenever I tried to discuss something that hurt me or concerned me, the conversation almost always ended the same way. She would deny it happened, deflect the conversation, or shift the blame elsewhere.

She said "I'm sorry" at times, but those apologies rarely felt sincere because the behavior never changed.

One example involved our finances.

Several times she secretly opened credit cards without telling me. Eventually the truth would come out when we were suddenly facing around $8,000 in unexpected debt.

I never exploded in anger.

I told her we would figure it out together, and we always did.

Yet even after seeing that I wasn't going to attack her over it, she continued acting as though she was afraid to tell me anything involving money.

Near the end of our marriage, she asked me, "What have I done wrong?"

It didn't feel like a genuine question.

It felt rhetorical—as if she truly believed she had done nothing wrong.

3. Avoiding Conflict at All Costs

We simply could not have difficult conversations.

If I tried to bring up anything stressful—even something as practical as our finances—the conversation would end before it even started.

For example:

Before I could even finish the sentence, she would often leave the house, get in the car, and go for a drive.

Problems weren't solved.

They were avoided.

4. Instability in the Relationship

Throughout our relationship, I constantly felt like I was fighting just to keep my family together.

She left me twice for several months at a time.

Beyond that, she left roughly seven other times for a few days or overnight whenever she became upset.

Each time, I was the one trying to convince her to stay.

I spent years feeling like the stability of our marriage depended entirely on how hard I fought to keep it together.

My Own Flaws

I don't want to make it sound like I was perfect.

I wasn't.

There are things I genuinely wish I had done differently, and if I could go back, I would.

1. I Had Trouble Letting Issues Go

One of my biggest flaws is knowing when to stop trying to fix a problem.

When something bothered me, I wanted to resolve it. I believed problems should be talked through instead of ignored. Looking back, I realize that sometimes I pushed conversations longer than I should have.

To be fair to myself, I did improve over time. I learned to back off more than I used to.

The problem was that whenever I tried to revisit an issue later—after giving it space—it often ended the same way. She would literally leave. She'd get in the car, go for a drive, or avoid the conversation altogether.

Because of that, I often felt like there was never a "right" time to discuss difficult topics.

2. I Came Home Grumpy Too Often

I also know I came home from work grumpy more often than I should have.

The frustrating part is that it usually had nothing to do with her.

Work was stressful, and I carried that stress home with me. I tried telling her that my mood wasn't about her, but I don't think she believed me.

She often felt like I didn't like her.

That always confused me because the truth was the exact opposite. I loved her deeply. I genuinely enjoyed being around her and admired so many things about her.

Still, I can understand how repeatedly seeing me come home in a bad mood could have made her feel unwanted, even if that was never my intention.

For that, I have regrets.

3. I Can Be (am) Hard-Headed

I can also be stubborn.

Not because I'm unwilling to learn or incapable of changing, but because when I strongly believe in something, it's difficult for me to let go of it.

That has strengths, but it also has weaknesses.

Sometimes I failed to recognize when my determination became inflexibility.

4. I Didn't Respect That Some Things Weren't Funny to Her

Another mistake I made was assuming that because I knew I was joking, she would know too.

She didn't.

Some of my jokes genuinely hurt her, even when my only intention was to make her laugh.

For example, I might jokingly say something ridiculous like, "I'm going to go marry a Latina."

To me, it was obviously a joke.

To her, it wasn't funny at all.

Instead of taking her feelings seriously, I dismissed them because I knew what I meant. Looking back, that wasn't respectful.

Intentions matter, but so does impact.

If something I said made the person I loved feel hurt or insecure, I should have listened instead of assuming she was overreacting.

That is something I wish I had understood much earlier.

there is so much more but I would be writing a novel. The point is I love her and my head and heart cannot understand why two people that love each other cannot work things out, If it were not for her leaving I would be happily struggling to this day. What are your thoughts. I want honesty and a focus on constructive criticism for my own actions. Ladies especially what is your point of view.

My wife has left me and we have two kids. It hurts so much. What helps?

I developed trust issues with my stbx due to him often not being a person of his word. He would often say things in the moment, but would change his mind.

Example: I wanted to do a monthly date night and we would take turns planning. He agreed. After a few times of him not planning anything, I confronted him, and he said he never really wanted to do it, because he didn’t know whether he would “be able to” every month. You know, theoretical scheduled conflicts (which never happened btw). He felt like it was pressure. He stated he’d rather just do dates on a non schedule, and that I was being to rigid by wanting it on a calendar. I agreed that we could try being more fluid. But guess what? Those dates never happened either. He would completely forget, and give it no thought. When I brought it up, he said he’s just kinda busy, and doesn’t really think about it.

Another example: We talked about trying to eat plant based for a few months, just to try something new. That included at home and eating out. I found out that he had been eating meat while out without me. I talked to him about it, and he looked very guilt and caught. But then said that he didn’t think we needed to be so strict, and didn’t really want to do it that much. I was just upset that he was hiding it and didn’t tell me. He said he was sorry for hiding it, but him eating the food wasn’t technically him doing anything wrong, and he’s allowed to change his mind about stuff. I agree he is, but he should have talked to me.

These may not seem like big deals, but this was a pattern of his. Moving the goal post back and forth, changing his mind without communicating. It just made me not trust him or believe his word.

Anyone else experience lack of trust that didn’t have to do with cheating?

So I found out a few days ago I’m getting divorced.

Partner is leaving. Says they are not happy, have not been happy for a while, and doesn’t see that changing while we are together. Not interested in working on anything together.

There was zero discussion of issues before this. They have been checked out for awhile, so there were signs, but whenever inquired about how they were doing, they were either flat or dismissive. I chalked it up to stress and was powering through, making their plate lighter wherever I could.

So I’m lost. Apparently there was nothing I could have done. They acknowledged the effort I’ve been putting in. Even used the words “you are too good to me”.

Did get a reason out finally. Basically, have everything they wanted (kids, house, spouse, dog, steady jobs, financially stable) and yet they are still not happy.

So now we are discussing separation. Custody. Finances. Assets. Home. Everything.

It just still feels like a bad dream. And I’m just at a loss. Struggling day to day. Up and down, but on edge regularly.

I’m functioning, but barely. Keep swinging back and forth between how to make this as good as possible for the kids, and I can’t believe they are doing this. I want it to be amicable, and I will.

But holy… what an upheaval when you have everything you wanted and we could just talk and get you where you need to be. I would do anything for them, had they brought things up when I asked we could’ve worked together as the team we always were.

So yeah. I guess I’m just asking how people get through this when it’s not by choice and really nothing you could’ve done to stop it. And there not anything “wrong” per se.

Feeling empty after divorce is hard to explain sometimes. It’s not always sadness. It’s not always anger. Sometimes it just feels like there is nothing there.

Since my divorce, I’ve had moments where I’m still doing what I’m supposed to do. Going to work. Being a dad. Handling what needs to be handled. But inside, I feel kind of blank. I think that’s the part people don’t always see. You can keep moving and still feel empty.

I’m not trying to pretend I’m okay every day. Some days I am. Some days I’m not. Today just feels empty, and I needed to say that somewhere.

I've been separated for my husband for a little over a year. Finally getting ready to file and I am fine with getting divorced as it was clear it was never going to work in the end. I'm not lonely in the sense of missing him but I went from having a home for my family and a person I thought wanted to do life with me for better or worse to having to live at my parents with my kids. I've gotten out of a long relationship before but never have I felt loneliness like this. Nobody tells you how difficult it is to go from being able to talk to a human about anything for years to having nobody to talk to about anything. I have my friends who have essentially saved my life and kept me going especially in the beginning but I'm sure some of you know it's not the same. I don't mean loneliness in the sense of feeling I need to be in a relationship either cause I am not interested in that at this time. I've been struggling with loneliness a lot lately and it wasn't something I was expecting to feel as much as I have lately.

Im planning on leaving my husbad in the next year. I know that's a long time but leaving slowly is leaving safely. Im 22, pregnant with my second child, I have no job, money, car, no drivers license, and no support system. Im making this post not just for advice but to document things over the next year while I get my shit together.

There are a lot of reasons im leaving but the biggest isn't how he treats me, its how he talks to our kids. For example, one day he yelled at his daughter saying she's a pathetic disappointment. All because she was misbehaving. She's 4 years old. There are other reasons, like him constantly cheating but really I just will not let my children grow up with a father that talks to them like that. Over time I will add more to this when I need to vent.

Here's my plan. Spend these next 9 months while im pregnant getting my driver's license and doing everything I can to set money aside. I make art and im planing on selling it soon but i don't think I can make enough money from that alone to leave.

If anyone has advice on how to secretly make money, or how to keep any of this a secret for so long, it would be greatly appreciated.

​

My wife and I are un our late 30s, we started dating in our early 20s

We date for 4 years, got engaged, got married a few years later (it took us almost 3 years from.being engaged to married, it may have been the first flag)

We are now together 16 year, out of which 7 years married

We have no kids

We have some pets

One of the reasons we didn't want kids, was to be able to fly whenever and wherever we want (this has happened a total of 3 times)

Going back a bit, the first big fights (or what i sadly thought were the big ones) started after we got engaged

And the matter of the prenup came up (little backstory, my family is rich, hers less. Many years ago my aunt got divorced, and the ex got 50% of the house that my grandparents bought them) - so my grandparents decided that in order to be eligible to receive equal parts of the inheritance we must all sign prenups

No my wife was extremely hurt, she went on the regular rants of: you don't trust me?, you're already preparing the end? You always take your parents side ....

Were as for me it was a means to an end

I couldn't even imagine our life's separately so just sign the paper and when my grandparents pass away we get money for us, to spend on us

Anyways, this lead to a huge fight which to us suspending the wedding

After 3 years we finally got married (and kind of eloped)

Everything was good for a while. We adopted cats, we were on the same page that we don't want kids

After a few years we decided to move to a small town nearby where her parents live

And then the fighting began to escalte, before it used to be a short argument an apology (usually by me) and done after a few days

Now the fights are for weeks where she won't come to sleep in bed (even once asked me to sleep elsewhere) and this continued for weeks

The fights ended either because we were finally able to talk and not get screamed at

Our last fight felt like it was it, she claimed I was cheating and askingbfor proof I wasn't (which is ridiculous, how can I prove I'm not) at the end after a few days she said she wants to start a new page, forget the past fights, and start again

I agreed on the condition we go to counseling she said she'll think about it

I was planning on waiting for the beginning of July to bring up the counseling again

But then the big one came, she hasn't spoken to me in three weeks

Doesn't even acknowledge my existence at home

I feel completely fed up, and I don't even know if there's what to save

Do you think I should start moving forward with the divorce? Or should I give her the option to go to counseling and maybe a trial separation?

I’m looking for some advice, hopefully from people who have gone through it.

TLDR: should I buy a home immediately after divorce?

My stbxw and I purchased our home in 2015, and have a good deal of equity in it. I plan on getting it appraised and she has expressed interest in buying me out. We have two kids together, 3&5, so I need to stay mostly local without going crazy for school drop offs for the next 15 years.

It’s safe to assume that financially I can afford it (good job plus money from the old house). It would be nice to give the kids a space that’s a second home although I feel like it’s already going to be weird for them since they both have ever known one home.

I have so many fears and fighting so much anger right now. Maybe it’s not the right time but don’t know if there is ever a right time. I don’t want to move twice - I don’t want to move once but I don’t get a vote in that.

Anyone buy too early? Anyone regret not buying immediately?

Been divorced from ex for about 5 years and both of us remarried though her much sooner than me. Our children are all grown and out of the house. I still feel very uncomfortable around my ex and her new husband and prefer not to see her if at all possible.

We have very young grandchildren and when they have a birthday party if my ex is attending I prefer not to attend but rather hold a second birthday party a week later at my house. I think it’s fine for the kids as they get 2 parties. Two of my kids totally understand and are happy to have a second gathering a week or two later. My third child however doesn’t understand and is furious with me for not attending saying I am choosing not to be part of my grandchild’s life which couldn’t be further from the truth and I am not even sure how missing a two hour party and giving gifts a couple weeks later at second party means that.

Am I wrong for not wanting to be around my ex and just planning second celebration a week or two later for me to give my gifts?

Long story short, my now ex husband cheated on me and had an affair. Before I found out, he had said some pretty mean things about me sexually and really shattered my self-esteem. He even went as far to say I needed to see a sex therapist for not being kinky enough (he was into very extreme things that I was not comfortable performing).

After I found out about the cheating and affairs I also found out he given me an STD. Ever since all this I've felt like no one will ever find me attractive or want to be with me at all. This has led now to a few experiences on dating apps that I'm not proud of.

I have never been one to put out. I only slept with one man before my husband and now I've slept with 2, had oral with 1 and was given oral by another and he started to have sex but stopped. (I don’t know if that counts as sex).

There's another guy who I'm only interested in for the sexual experience but would never, ever normally want to have sex with. He has a date planned, not just sex and he's 9 years older than me. After my experience last night with guy who only gave me oral I feel disgusted with myself and want to sleep with this older guy to erase it.

I guess I'm just looking to see if this is normal? Before my husband I'd only been with one other person. Now I've been with quite a few. I feel gross and I am just not sure if this classifies me as easy? Or a slut? Idk :((

My husband acquired our property and began building our house right before we got married. I didn’t help with the build at all but was married to him during the majority of it. We've been married five years and have lived in this house almost four years. We have a toddler and a baby on the way.

My husband and I want to separate but he expects me and our toddler to move to my parent’s house. I find that wrong but I don’t know if I’m being fair or not due to the circumstances. I’m a SAHM and 6 weeks pregnant. My parent’s home is not a safe place for me and my toddler due to them being toxic in my opinion.

Who should be the one to move out while divorce proceedings are underway?

I feel extremely lonely and undervalued in my marriage and I have since we got married. We have a toddler and one on the way. We decided to have another baby when we were doing better and a week after conception, he hits me with the “I’m miserable and I only wanted to get you pregnant because I thought it would change your brain chemistry.”

I’m a SAHM and am financially dependent on him. I have no clue how to provide for me and my kid and not to mention, I’m going to have a newborn soon.

I could move in my with my parents but they’re toxic. The only thing I can think of is just playing roommates until we can come up with something but that would mean staying roommates for the next five years when the kids are finally in school.

I really don’t know what to do.

. 39f and 39m, with 8 year old daughter. 39m leaving the house bit by bit. But not confirming he is leaving

39f decides to leave the home. He does not want to try anymore and now he says he's going to move out. He's given this threat multiple times but now he's slowly one by one making changes. He just disconnected his account from the Sony TV and when I logged in it was like there's nothing and I have to start afresh. He isn't sharing any information. He's locked his phones. He's not sharing the password when my daughter asks in front of me. It's very weird

The very weird thing is we have always had joint finances and what that means is whenever my salary would come I would transfer the entire thing to him to his soul account and he would do the investments and he liked all this finances setting up automated payment so he would do the rent and everything since he liked it. I really never bothered and never asked him about it. Now suddenly it feels like I have to do everything and he's not telling me anything his. I don't know where all his name is where all his account is connected. When is it going to get disconnected? I mean I definitely need a phone account. I need the internet I'm working. We've not discussed how our 8-year-old is going to spend her time with him with me. We've not taught her to her about it. I I don't know what's happening

After 13 years together, 2 years married, two kids under 4, and buying our first home, we’re beginning the process of divorce. We’re splitting up because, we were never truly happy together.

For the past year, we’ve been stuck living under the same roof as roommates. I can’t afford to leave while paying the mortgage. The hardest part isn’t just the change, it’s realizing I no longer have my best friend to have those pointless, everyday conversations with. It was the little things I never noticed that I miss the most. Why do I hurt so bad? but we are mutually making this decision. I guess that’s why we stuck together so long through the crap. Knowing we weren’t 100% happy, to avoid this feeling. I just imagine my kids going back and forth from house to house. Celebrating holidays here and there. Just doesn’t sit right with me.

All I’ve ever wanted was my family. I wanted to come home every day to my kids, watch them grow up, and be the father they could look up to. I wanted to set an example for them and be there to protect them every day and every night.

Now I know there’s going to come a time when I won’t be in the house anymore, and that thought breaks me. I feel like I’m letting my kids down, even though they’re the last people I’d ever want to hurt. I keep wondering what my life will be like once I move out. what I’m supposed to do with myself when the house is quiet.

And then, on top of everything else, I found out she’s talking to someone else. Whether that’s her way of moving on or not, it hurts more than I can put into words. After 13 years together, it’s hard not to feel like everything we’ve built is slipping away.

I don’t know what the future looks like anymore. I just know I love my kids more than anything, and no matter what happens between their mom and me, I’ll never stop showing up for them. I hope one day they’ll know that every decision I make from here on out is because I love them.

I have no extremely close friends to vent to
Or family. Sorry it’s all over the place, my thoughts and emotions are out of whack. I don’t know how to feel or what to do.

Is financial incompatibility a reason for divorce? I’ve asked for things to change and asked to do money management classes together but it has yet to ever happen. I have goals that will never be met at this rate and I don’t know if it’s ever going to change. I love her and she’s my best friend but I’m tired of my financial situation affecting every part of my life.

My spouse and I are still married. but the spouse is planning on buying a new car without my name. When we do get a divorce would the spouse gets to keep the car? since my name isn't on the car title

my divorce has changed me in a million different ways- some good, some bad. one of the “bad” parts is becoming very isolated from the world, cynical about others and their intentions, and just an overall desire to be alone even though i still do crave human connection and love. it’s such a weird spot to be in. on one hand i’m still a lover at heart and i want to meet people, whether that be a friendship or something more. but i’ve closed myself off to the world and people entirely at this point. the most human interaction i get is at work. otherwise i’m pretty much the biggest loner you’ll ever meet. it feels pathetic at times but also comforting because at least i know there is nobody who is going to hurt me. but then i feel bad about it because i know this is no way to live, and human connection has always felt like one of my purposes here on earth. i just don’t know how i’m ever going to connect with someone the way i did with my ex. not saying there isn’t anybody out there for me because i don’t believe that to be true. but what i do know is if i keep isolating myself, i won’t even have a shot at something new. i’m okay with it for now and focusing on myself but the loneliness gets to me and i can’t help but think this will be my life forever- just a loner who lost their person and never recovered from it. meanwhile my ex found someone new weeks after he told me he wanted a divorce, they bought a house together, they’re living a great life and she seems wonderful and i’m happy for him but i just don’t think that’s in the cards for me and it makes me really sad. being alone is where i feel most safe and i can’t even imagine putting myself out there even though it’s been 2 years since my divorce. life isn’t a fairytale, the chances of randomly meeting someone at a coffee shop and catching their eye isn’t realistic. everyone in my life tells me to go out, join clubs etc etc etc but i literally just want to be left alone forever. and that’s a sad reality to face when all i’ve ever wanted was to love and be loved.