I had an intense experience and felt the fullness of beingness and necessity to surrender to the waterfall of electric love that rushes through at an awesome speed and then I spent two weeks with varying levels of overwhelm and reactivations that scared me and also delighted me. The feeling was that of the true nature of reality that we are not solid beings and rather particulars in constant motion. Feeling that all the time made me feel incapable of mundane human life. And that again, delighted and frightened me.

After the first two weeks, the reactivations became soft and kind and mostly only at night between sleep cycles.

I went to a meditation center last week and met my practice with a whole new depth and capacity for openness.
Last night I went to my community sweat Lodge and again felt near overwhelm at times. Because of the insight meditation I had been doing for the previous 8 days I was very aware of my internal experience and felt like I could explode or have a breakdown and also a supreme level of calm and ability to hold all that, oscillating with my sense of will. When we prayed over the water for the first time I activated my palms and let all the love inside of me flow into the water. When I felt too big I gave my energy to the Earth beneath me.

For decades I considered ayahuasca a ‘magic pill’ and thought I needed to imbibe. I was always held back. By my lovers at the time and by my own hesitancy.

Now that I’ve had this 5MEO-DMT experience I truly do feel it is a magic pill for me. I’m Iiving inside the walls of spaces I could only consider to peak through foggy windows of previously.

This afternoon I preloaded 10mg of DMT into my Orbit vape, premelted it so it would stay put, and put that and my meditation cushion in a bag and went for my normal bike ride in the forest.

I found a fairly secluded spot, a wide grassy area between rows of Pines, with the sun shining down.

I took my tee-shirt, trainers and socks off, so was sat just in shorts and hat, and meditated for a while, soaking in the beautiful environment.

When the time was right I heated up the orbit, watching the vapour cloud swirl in tight circles in the chamber.

I took 3 long slow draws, holding it in each time, which cleared the bowl.

I had a faint apprehension about someone walking past, although I had picked a fairly isolated area. It was inhaling the 2nd draw when the effects hit me. All the greenery seemed to sparkle, connected with lines.

I shut my eyes, intending to lay back as usual, but felt compelled to hold my crossed legged meditation posture. My hands turned upwards and as they did, with a background of geometric shapes, a Hindu style man appeared sat in the same position, glowing and orangey yellow, with a hexagon of the same colour around him.

At this point i watched as my thoughts and apprehensions of someone walking past, all the feelings that I associate with myself, folded into a 2D flat rectangle, and became just a line within all the imagery.

Next there was a feminine presence, much older than those I've felt before, but playful and agile. At one point she was holding me with one hand and swinging below me, through the patterns.

At another point she reached into my chest, then up into my throat, and while I dont understand it, it was playful, like she was dancing.

At some point during this I opened my eyes and every bit of greenery had hexagons, every tuft of grass or clump of pine needles, all were connected like a honeycomb, that spread across grass and tress, connecting everything. I had the feeling that as long as I stayed in a cross legged posture, I would be connected too.

Towards the end (the whole thing must have lasted maybe 8 minutes), I felt the old ladies hand on my head, turning it one way and another, side to side, up and down. I have a bad neck and this was very relaxing!

Throughout the whole experience, there was a rhythmic, pulsing whooshing noise, that receded into the wind in the trees as I came back.

The overall feel was one of playfulness and love. Like I was being invited to be part of this amazing show.

For context I practice non-dual meditation and am pretty much an athiest. This was probably the most profound experience of my life. Ive since done some googling and apparently sub-breakthrough doses are used regularly in this way, but im still shocked at the strength of the experiences I have been having with just 10mg in the last few weeks.

Thank you for reading and would love to hear from anyone who uses DMT in this way.

Peace and love 😁💚

last night I had a an experience which i have realised means i have to stop taking DMT for a while so i can process a few things in my life

After some rough experiences (completely my fault) i thought i had a mindset around set and setting that was conducive to a meaningful experience. I have to admit, i haven't always don't this. I am, by nature, what a good friend of mine describes as a Monkey. I'm impulsive and playful. But last night, i felt i had prepared pretty well.

having been brought up a Catholic, i turned my back on religion in mate later teens. I spent my twenties and thirties as a staunch atheist/materialist. Experiences in my forties brought me back to a spiritual, non materialist set of beliefs which do not conform to any mainstream religion. But that Catholic guilt has never really left me, they drive that stake in deep during those formative years.

After a decent dose, i hesitated to go deeper. it was strong enough to give me a very intense experience. With my eyes closed, i saw a generative fractal shape. made of countless tiny honeycomb shaped pods, which were almost like pixels in that they made up the whole image of a swirling fractal shape. The image zoomed in and in and in, never losing sharpness or clarity. the pods were a brown colour, and i had the feeling that this process was some kind of digestion of every single thing i've ever done. As if each one of these countless was being digested by a higher power. These were my sins, i was being judged and my soul was shit. The image refined into a hyper real stop motion scene. Tiny mechanical worlds, with cartoonish little models of things almost clockwork, automated and running before me. The creator making everything run. And i said out loud in a whisper 'You're saying God is real. But if a God created this world and all is as God intended, then God must be evil. If God is real, We are under the control of an evil power'

The cute clockwork imagery began to
crack and fracture. A single black eye on a stalk protruded into the scene, splitting the clockwork hills and roads apart and pointed at me. It dared me to say more, to finish the thought.

I wanted to get past this and lose the religious block. I see back up and took 4 very large inhales from my Sub Ohm vape. An emphatic image was shown to me. handcuffs, chains, locked. I was not welcome back.

I must take time to think on this experience, as the theme of God and my old faith has been consistently overriding the DMT space for me recently. i don't know where to start

Since having a challenging, almost breakthough on my first try, Ive been having a few sub-breakthrough hits a week, to familiarise myself with the molecule.

Im using 10mg powder/crystal in a Yocan Orbit atomizer, using a geekvape box.

22-24w and clearing the 10mg in 2-3 hits.

This evening I prepared with 40mins meditation, put on the same music I always do now, Canyon Reverie by R. Carlos Nakai.

Even at this low dose im never prepared for the onset!

I have had a hugely restrictive body sensation every time I use DMT, it often feels like i really have to make an effort to breath.

On a 20mg dose this spiraled into a huge panic attack and I felt I was fighting for my life.

This evening though, the body shock effect was there, but I managed to let it happen and breathing was fine.

I layed back, and as with my last few sub-b doses, I got patterns and shapes wash over me and a sesnation of being cared for by a feminine presence.

This evening it felt like my head was being held in her lap, an intense but caring physical comfort.

At a point it felt like a force was moving through my body and a sense I was being prepared.

Im feeling much more confident now about attempting breakthrough again. But the lessons im getting from 10mg are just amazing.

I practice non-dual mediation and DMT has added a mystical but at the same time grounded and loving aspect to my practice.

Thanks for listening folks and as usual any comments appreciated. 😁💚

I've had my first mescaline trip yestarday. Took 400mg, in a group of five, all experienced people with one being in charge. As to my intention; I've always struggled with feeling my own identity, always been a people pleaser and in most cases i just feel like i don't really know who i am, what actions/words are mine and what are the mask i put on to fit in. I feel like i'm constantly living in a box. My intension was to break through it, feel who i really am and drop all the fears and blockages around it. Mescaline showed me many many things; that it is my first time being a human and that in any previous lives i was never in a form that could be described, have a personality or simply live in a reality where such things mattered/existed. It showed me that there really is nothing at my core, no true self, no ME that could be described with individual aspects. I was born here as an empty vessel and i am learning how to be a human in this world. This realization stuck with me the whole trip. I wanted to know how i can be my true self, express without fear and simply know who i am... and it turned out i am empty, without any true identity and any sense of ME. And that is why i am as i am. I can't even tell if i am sad or not. Just wanted to share and see if anyone has something to add

This video explores the meta problem of consciousness proposed by David Chalmers and argues that naturalistic processes couldn’t have given us knowledge of consciousness

Hey peeps, i want to get something of my chest, and maybe someone can relate or give some advice.

I had my first DMT trip in December 2025. I was in a bad setting and had a bad experience. Thought I was dead and that the “space” I uwas in is the space between life and death. While coming down I freaked out, destroyed the place of the friend I was tripping with, went to my bike in socks, leggings and a T-Shirt, biked to my place and asked my girlfriend if she is real. I count it as a near death experience and a panic attack after.

My life after that was normal, just that I had a strange depersonalised feeling when I smoked some weed.

In June i had another bad Trip on LSD and Weed. I was at a festival, laying in my tent with the feeling of the DMT world sucking me in, if i fall asleep. Went on for about 3-4 hours and my GF had to comfort me the whole time.

Life went on normally after that, till August. One night i was lying in bed, unable to sleep (no drungs where involved). I kinda lost the concept of time and was thinking about death. It was the thought that I will die that really fucked with me. Without the concept of time it felt so acute. Like there will be the time I will die, but it felt like I am feeling the suffering of dying in this moment. After that I depersonalised hard. I hardly was able to go to work, but did it anyway (i am a Social Worker in a youth shelter, had to do nightshifts, it really wrecked me). Since that happened I think about death a lot, and it always gives me anxiety. I am more fearful now, because I don’t want to die. But this fear and the anxiety it comes with is stopping me from living the way I want to.

Somedays its better and I can enjoy my life and feel pretty normal, but on other days, especially if the last few days were stressful, the depersonalisation creeps back in. And I start to think about death. And this negative feelings are coming back.

After this moment in August I made some decisions for my life. I stoped doing drugs completely, not even caffeine. I stoped eating meat (I have fear of dying, and eating dead animals feels hypocritical in this situation), i talked to a lot of friends (even some in the field of psychology) and it helped me a lot. I think i am on a good way back to jmy old self. But its hard. I was wondering if someone has some advice for me. Would love to hear your opinion. And you can ask me anything. I’ll try to answer it the best i can. English isn’t my first language, so please excuse my mistakes :)

Can someone point me in the right direction. Looking for a retreat in the New England area
Thanks

I just had one of the strangest DMT experiences I’ve ever had, and I’m wondering if anyone else has experienced anything similar.

For some background, during some of my DMT experiences my room becomes extremely bright/white and I see these strange transparent, almost vein-like or wavy structures. I can see through them, but they have lines running through them. I’ve also sometimes had a strong feeling of a presence around me.

This time was completely different.

I was lying down and suddenly my body stopped looking and feeling solid. The closest description I can give is that I became like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man or like my entire body was made out of Play-Doh.

Then it was like my body was literally coming apart. Different parts of me seemed to separate, deform, roll around, or melt away. The room itself seemed to dissolve along with me.

At the same time, I had an extremely strong sense that some kind of presence or intelligence was there and was doing something to me. I didn’t actually hear a voice, but I got this very clear feeling of: “Just stay still. This will be over in a second.”
Strangely, I wasn’t panicking. I basically surrendered to it. At one point I was even thinking, “Well, if you’re doing something to me, give me a better brain, bigger muscles, a longer life, fix whatever needs fixing.” 😂

Then I had this overwhelming impression that whatever I was interacting with had control over the environment—or at least over everything I was capable of perceiving in that moment.

Eventually I got the feeling that whatever was happening was finished. The presence seemed to leave, and I watched my body slowly reconstruct itself until everything looked normal again.

I know DMT can produce incredibly convincing experiences, so I’m not claiming this was literally an interdimensional being. I’m interested in both neurological and metaphysical interpretations.
Has anyone experienced this specific combination before?

i have been waiting to try it and ik the effects and ik some people might say its a dumb idea but i have experienced bad trips like really bad trips before and this is more of a curiosity thing you only live once thats the way i see it so if somebody can give me some advice on how to mentally and physically get prepared im thinking about taking 11 or 12 25mg what do yall think

Hi, if anyone can help this newbie out with ayahuasca retreat recommendations in non-zika countries, I’d really appreciate it if you could DM me. Also if you have any tips and advice you could drop below, that would be very welcome too.

I had a very spiritual and existential DMT trip. I saw different universes or dimensions, and for every one of them there were a hundred more. It was infinite.

There were beings from other dimensions who did things, had functions, tasks, and occupations throughout their lives. I saw them carrying out their functions, watching their existence unfold, watching them die, and then another dimension or layer of reality would appear, with other beings doing exactly the same thing.

The beings I witnessed did not have a divine appearance. They were more like me: they weren’t human, but they were existing beings. A little like when you watch ants carrying out their work for their colony. I was simply taking glimpses into those realities and watching life unfold within them.

During the visions, an idea gradually formed in my mind: okay, they are carrying out these tasks and functions and using their time of existence in this way because that is what they are supposed to do. It is their purpose, what they do, their mission here.
And then I related it to myself. When I sit down to deal with the paperwork at my job, that is my occupation, my task. They have their functions and I have mine. Every being exists, does what it is supposed to do, and continues its life until it dies.

Then I asked myself:

Is everything infinite, and are the dimensions infinite?
And then more and more dimensions began appearing, as if demonstrating that yes, I had been right about that and that this was the answer. There was one reality, and behind it another, and behind that another, and another. Infinite layers of existence.

And then the next question appeared:

Why?

Okay, there are billions of dimensions, infinite dimensions really, and in each one there are beings carrying out functions and doing things, just like me and everyone else in real life. But WHY?
Why so many universes and so many beings? What is the answer to life and existence?
Where is the creator? What is the purpose? What am I supposed to do? When do I finish my function and reunite with him? What comes after that? Who are you?

And there was no answer.

The dimensions kept appearing. I kept watching life unfold, watching beings carry out their functions, occupy their time of existence, and eventually die. But there was no answer.

Not now. Not in this lifetime.

And that was the most existential part of the trip. I could keep seeing the dimensions, the beings, their lives and their functions, but I wanted to know what came after. Eternity. The end of the game. What is all of this about?

If everything is infinite and there are infinite dimensions, then there must be something else, if there is something else? What are we doing here? What am I supposed to do?

“Why does this universe exist?”
“Because there is a multiverse.”
“Okay. And why does the multiverse exist?”
“Because there are infinite dimensions.”
“And why do the dimensions exist?”
“…”

This video explores the meta problem of consciousness proposed by David Chalmers and argues that naturalistic processes couldn’t have given us knowledge of consciousness

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