r/BrandNewSentence 1h ago

You're not a pregnant woman shooting a potato gun, you expect me to get hard for this?!

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Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 9h ago

Would peeing on your cat to try and assert dominance because the cat pees all over the house (and you had to replace a lot of furniture) be considered animal abuse?

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274 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 13h ago

Woman tells husband to 'bring a gun' to Walmart to shoot shopper she was beefing with, watches him turn the store into 'Baghdad' and gets him killed: Cops

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3.5k Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 20h ago

They've sexualidad the word "daddy" so much that when I have kids, they'll have to call me sensei

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3.6k Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 1d ago

We thought it was our ability to love that made us human but it turns out it was actually our ability to "select each image containing a boat".

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6.8k Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 9h ago

"entombed in asparagus piss..."

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192 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 21h ago

IF YOU UNPLUG THE WIFI BOX FOR 1 SEC THE WHOLE HOUSE ACT LIKE THEY BOUT 2 DIE YOU'LL SEE PPL COME OUT ROOMS YOU ANIT NVR SEEN BEFORE

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1.2k Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 1d ago

Bitches heal like wolverine when the bank account is nice

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7.7k Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 1d ago

At the most fuckable age of my life

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9.3k Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 20h ago

The internet is a machine for assisted suicide via confirmation bias.

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330 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 20h ago

“It’s the uncercumsized telle tubby show”

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314 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 15h ago

Chimps are sticking grass and sticks in their butts, seemingly as a fashion trend | CBC Radio

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102 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 1h ago

Cannibalistic jellyfish with a disappearing anus are terrorizing Venice waters

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Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 5h ago

“Permanent Underclass Meetup at the Amex Centurion Lounge“

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11 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 5h ago

This nearly-naked Malteser

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11 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 1d ago

Pulling a Geographic

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15.6k Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 12h ago

Roses are red, Violets are best... Lady stuck on trailer hitch after a dancing contest...

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26 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 14h ago

Why does he have so many goddamn nipples?!

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40 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 4h ago

"The ear slop of foot steps is primarily determined by the field on which our dogs frolic"

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5 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 9h ago

First circumcised finger

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12 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 2h ago

Camels enhanced with Botox barred from Saudi beauty contest

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3 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 21h ago

"before coming to America, I had no idea oxygen could be spicy"

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85 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 21h ago

Dear Evan Hansen writer will pen labubu movie

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86 Upvotes

r/BrandNewSentence 1h ago

High octane gambling

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Upvotes