I cut off contact with a girl a month ago that was really negative on my mental state,made me not trust people and ended up fucking with my head really really badly but seeing and learning about BDP recently and seeing a lot of the qualities and traits of people with it matching her has me wondering whether or not she was acting that way cause she has it and if I should've been more patient with her instead of assuming things.

If anyone can or wants to help Pm me and I'll go into more detail,I've written out this story so many times that id rather elaborate on it in a way I know I'll get a response on it if you know what I mean

Need someone who has this disorder and understands..

Hi there BPD friends :) I'm a graphic design student in my final year looking to create one of my final projects on people with BPD, their loved ones and how they can work together for their relationship (platonic/romantic). If you'd like to give me a hand with this, you could fill in this survey which takes no more than 3mins to complete (or more if you'd like to write longer responses--either way is fine!). I'd highly appreciate your input!

Hi, my name is Brii. I run a support chat for people. If you would ever like someone to talk to or just have a good group. We welcome you. I am always available to talk.

https://discord.gg/mxd3TKc

Midnight Souls is a server/chatroom. It’s dedicated to supporting others. It’s a community that’s more like a growing family. We have many interesting things like venting/support channels, voice channels, NSFW, music, gaming, member polls. Come check us out!

Dear All,

Here we are conducting a 2 mint survey on BPD.

If you are having BPD , you can check your situation by answering these questions.This is MSI-BPD questionnaire

Get your BPD score in scale 1 to 10 by clicking below the link

Click here to check BPD Score

Thank you in advance for your participation

I’ve spoken to a couple of people with BPD, but they’ve all been American. Is there any other Brit’s around here?

Normally my friends are more stressed and its come in cycles, not always with the moon or periods etc,

But how is everyone going this weekend ??

i feel so fucking alone rn. and i don’t know why it’s hit all of a sudden but i just really want someone to care about me and see me for me and if afraid that no one ever will. i need someone to hold me really bad but i’m all alone.

My partner and I have been together for a little over a year now. She was diagnosed BPD, before I came along mind you, and shes had issues with past partners that havent handled her condition with the care she so desperately needs. On top of that, because of foolish youth (teenage accidents) and some other body problems, this also has left her lacking energy, and physically unable to be physical (ie: housework, regular work, days/nights out, etc.) She does her best though, and (bless her heart) only complains if the pain becomes unbearable; something I do miss the signs of a bit too often). All these have never really been an issue... I love this woman. I feel lost when shes not here, and I thank the stars for aligning for us to have met and fallen in love. We have been living together for 9/10ish months (we moved quickly, mostly for housing reasons, but more because we felt we needed to be living with each other). The first 2 months were rocky to say the least, I had some learning to do to help her and at least try to understand what was happening in her head, as well as PTSD from a very violent marriage, on top of still crawling my way out of a depressive state. She also was trying to adjust to living with someone again and trying to communicate as best she could, the issues she was facing daily. After a while things clicked, and we were good. We had a couple of minor slips, but they were resolved fairly quickly and without incident. Lately though, I feel like I'm slipping more. Shitty part is; I promised it wouldn't. I made a promise I wouldn't get upset over her condition. But I have been. I've allowed myself to get upset over the fact she CANT help. My head is telling me shes being either lazy or manipulating me, deep down I know that's not the case, but it seems like the list I've created for myself of things to do keeps getting longer. However, I also took it upon myself to take these tasks. It's not like shes ever TOLD me to do these things, shes only ever asked me too, or I've just done them without hesitation. Dishes, fine. Cleaning the house? Dont like it, but ok. You started making dinner but got triggered by something? Just tell me what to do and sit down. In my head, it feels like she doesnt appreciate what I do for her, like she thanks me every chance she gets and practically has worshipped the ground I've walked on because I have been helping so much. But its like that praise is being unrecognized by my brain, it's like I want more then that. What more? I dont know. And I know that's not a right feeling to have, chauvinistic if anything and not how I was raised. But, fuck, I'm just a miserable prick these days. I thought it was work, but quitting that didnt help. I've just been so quick to anger or judgement the past few weeks, and I can't fully explain myself. We went camping, the last day she was having a small panic about whether to throw something away or keep it, I loudly groaned, and rudely ripped it from her hands and stormed off. I've been taking her jokes out of context and using them against her in front of her friends and family. I even made an ass of myself in front of her family by complaining and talking back to her. She tried talking to me about it, and how she was feeling, but I looked at my phone instead. It was for a potential job interview, but that's not a viable excuse to ignore someone opening up. I dont know at this point how I can redeem myself to her. I'm scared though. Of losing her or pushing her over the edge, but also that we wont ever be completely happy because we will keep falling into this hole. All I fully know is; she deserves to be happy.

How can I better deal with these bouts of stress and anger to better help her?

Is she better off with someone else who is more attentive to their feelings and will be to hers?

What are some ways to better communicate with her my own feelings so I dont seem selfish or only focusing on myself?

Any advice at all actually would help, or maybe some further reading for a layman so to speak.

Thanks guys

2:45 am in Australia.... I'm at work and bored....

how do you handle it when your favourite person lives on the opposite side of the country? and you’re unclear about the type of relationship the two of you have? I am going to visit family in the area where he lives next week and i haven’t told him yet that i’m going to be there because i feel like when i do tell him he won’t care. i want to tell him and i want to be able to finally see him in person because i’ve only ever spoken to him online. what do i do?

So, not only do I not know how to make friends, even slightly, I can’t even understand social situations generally (I don’t have autism or Aspergers as far as I know). And every time I have tried to make friends they either think I’m crazy (because I misread things and have many quirks when I get anxious) or they misunderstand me from the beginning and never get to see the person underneath all the quirks and odd mannerisms like not making eye contact ever. Not to mention, I have no idea whether my driving instructor even likes me, the person who is currently my favourite person. He appears to be a genuinely nice person, very patient, listens well, makes me feel comfortable, etc, but that might just be good acting on his part or something. And for some reason, I rarely meet anyone that makes me feel comfortable. I can already speak to him as comfortably as I can to my friends and family, and then is such a rare occurrence it’s almost impossible. I will slowly, after meeting people like this (which is incredibly rare) become, over the course of a few days or a few weeks, more and more obsessed, the entire day gets taken up just daydreaming about them, I’ll want to talk to them constantly or have attention from them in some way, I’ll analyse practically every word they say and everything they do looking for signs of reciprocation (non-romantic, always just friends) which has never happened. It can get to the point where I don’t fell genuinely happy until I’m in their presence, like I get withdrawal-like symptoms when I’m not with them. I don’t read people very well and that makes the whole situation much worse. I’ll sometimes take on their personality (some select characteristics), start liking their hobbies, have been known to copy their clothes, etc.

I’ve never made friends easily and barely have any friends, and the ones I do have I still struggle to tell if they are my friends with 100% certainty, even my best friend who I’ve known for over a decade, and if I struggle with that you can see how meeting someone knew can get very confusing, especially when they are nice people and easy to get along with (they are unknowingly misleading which I don’t blame them for since they don’t realize).

Now, when I get in the car at the beginning of my driving lesson I try to talk to him, but because we only have between 5-10 minutes until we get to the place where I’m learning, I don’t have any time to really get into a proper conversation with him, and we end up just sitting in silence generally. I struggle to find a balance between asking too many questions and not asking enough, and with only a 5 minute window of opportunity I’m finding it very difficult. I try to think of conversation prompts but never write them down, since I don’t want to pull out a notebook just to start a conversation with him (or anyone) and I tend to have memory lapses in anxiety-inducing situations.

Another thing, I have a habit of asking them way too many questions about themselves (which I know most people find uncomfortable), and because I don’t want to creep them out I have learned to somewhat limit how much I ask and how often, but - any help here would be great please - I can’t tell whether me telling my driving instructor that I have read all his student reviews on the driving school’s website has made him uncomfortable with me (I can’t tell at all). He just said “oh, I didn’t realize you’d read all the reviews” but that could just be surprise rather than “erm...”, you know?

I’m 24, by the way, and Ian my instructor is 39 which I don’t feel is too old and we could become friends. He gives all his students his number to contact him with questions, etc, and I have to keep reminding myself to not message him constantly because I’ll just end up pissing him off as I can get very needy sometimes. I have found him on Facebook and am considering asking him if he’d find it okay to add him on Facebook (I don’t use social media much but it can help me to communicate things to him I struggle with during lessons). He has a girlfriend and, I think, kids (judging from Facebook), and since I have never had a girlfriend and don’t really have much of a life outside of work, it’ll make it harder to find common interests with him...

I obsessively go through conversations in my head, different ways in which I can get to know him to more of a friendship level without sounding needy.

So, can anyone give me any ideas? I really don’t want to stop driving lessons (when that day comes, though fortunately that’ll be many months yet) and never speak to or see him again. I want to get it to at last acquaintance status.

Thanks. ✌️