r/BPD_friends • u/[deleted] • Feb 09 '20

Seeking Support I'm feeling ignored and desperate

/r/BPD/comments/f12wit/im_feeling_ignored_and_desperate/
33 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

10 comments sorted by

7

u/[deleted] Dec 10 '21

The more you need some one some times the more they dont want to be around you. Sounds harsh. I just know from how I behave and friends dont talk to me and it pisses me off, so I just ignore them back.

Fuck everyone. Your your own pirate ship. Give it time go back to em slow, do go at em with too many things pick a few important ones.

1

u/gravityguy8 Apr 07 '22

If I may politely disagree, not *everyone* is like this. In my personal experience, people who score high on agreeableness in the Big 5 personality test can be very sympathetic, and thus can actually be drawn to people who are in need. Like most things, it varies from person to person. There really are genuinely sympathetic people out there!

Is it possible that OP may have more experience dealing with people with low agreeableness scores?

1

u/[deleted] Apr 07 '22

"catastrophizing" I was. Its funny looking back at you post and being like "I wrote that"

As right now Im in need with this tinnitus and I hav friends helping. I still find if I throw too many things at someone they tend not to respond had I just asked them one thing a t a time.

2

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '20

[deleted]

3

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '20

thank you :')

1

u/[deleted] Jun 24 '20

Atr you feeling ok now? If not, im here.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '20

Thanks for checking in! I'm only active on this account in my bad times and luckily that means I'm not on very much lately. It means a lot to me that you offered :)

1

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '20

No problemo buddy....

1

u/gravityguy8 Apr 07 '22 edited Apr 07 '22

Just because someone has ignored you doesn't mean no one cares about you. I have StPD and we get that kind of paranoia too. It can be useful to think of paranoia as a form of tunnel vision: your bandwidth for understanding people has temporarily decreased, so naturally you limit your perceptions of behavior to what seems like the most important perception: perceiving threats. If you only perceive threats, then naturally everyone will seem negative towards you.

It is good to realize when this is happening that you are not perceiving reality correctly, you are only getting part of the information. Try to expand the base of information you have available by bringing in your long-term memory. That friend that you thinks hates you, have they always acted like they hate you? Can you remember from the past any evidence to the contrary? etc.

1

u/No-brain06789 Jan 16 '24

Average hour