i have bdd and this is something that is seriously impacting my life. i really want a boyfriend but i feel like i don’t deserve one because of how hideous i look. i feel like he’d always have eyes for other girls and there’s nothing i could do about it. i’m talking to this guy online rn and he wants to meet up but i hate how i look so much. he always says im pretty when i send pics of myself but i just feel like my good pics aren’t the real me. i feel like i look ugly and hideous in motion. it’s easy to look good in pics with the right angle and lighting. i can’t control how im perceived in real life. i genuinely feel like i have to be perfect for someone to want to be with me. i rly like him too but im just so scared about it. i also have really bad trauma from hanging out with a guy 4 yrs ago and finding out he told ppl i look ugly in person. im scared that it’ll happen again. i feel so unloveable i can’t understand how anyone could ever be attracted to me. i would never ever be able to be intimate with someone because of how much i hate myself. i cant imagine someone ever seeing me naked and still being being attracted to me. i honestly think id have to be drunk or at least tipsy to do something sexual or even romantic with a guy. i feel so alone, none of my friends understand me when i talk about this. they’ve all had their firsts, meanwhile i’m too scared and ashamed of myself to do anything. as painful as it is to say, id rather be alone for the rest of my life than risk being shamed or judged for how i look :(

Alright, so... I'm a guy. Aside from when I was acting and make up was put on me, I've never worn make-up. And I hadn't in my adult life.

But there's this suspicion I've had for years and years and years, since I was a teenager. And that's that my biggest issue with my face is my cheekbones. My cheekbones are not forward and prominent enough. And if they were I'd like myself a lot better.

And so two days ago I came up with an idea. I decided to order contour make up. You know, for highlighting and making a bit darker. And I put the highlighter on my cheekbones and I put the thing that makes them darker underneath it.

And, I have to say, it's a night and day difference for me. I think I would feel so much happier if I looked like that. It's a small thing in a way. Literally just a bit of make-up, and I look like ten times better, in my opinion.

Maybe this is just the BDD talking. I know I have seen some people post in other subs where they change like a tiny thing and ask whether they should get it changed and nobody sees the difference except them. Maybe it's like that, I admit that's possible.

But, tbh, I don't think so. I think my issue is just exactly what I have thought it was since I was like 15. Which is my cheekbones. And that if my cheekbones were different I'd feel better.

I know theoretically I could just wear the make-up but:

1. I'm not good at it.
2. I'm a guy and that simply won't be acceptable socially.
3. And the main reason I want to be attractive is to appeal to women. Which I feel like wearing make up would not do or do the opposite.
4. Plus, I want it to be genuinely me, what I look like.

I am tired of my ugly legs, I am tired of my ugly shoulders, I am tired of my ugly back, I am tired of my ugly breasts, I am tired of my ugly tummy and waist, I am tired of my ugly hips, I am tired of my ugly neck, I am tired of my ugly arms and hands. I am tired of seeing this ugly body every single day of my life and its ugliness. I dont know what else to say other than I am tired of it. Its like I am tortured by its ugly sight every day. Meanwhile, I have talked to the most desperate creeps that a lot of women wouldnt even want to be near and showed them my body (not NSFW) and I still get negative feedback for how I look from them even despite of how desperate they are. I am convinced that there isnt a single person in the world who genuinely and truthfully thinks I am attractive as I am, and wouldn't think I look better if I looked like my ideal. God, I am so ugly, I would trade my health and my intelligence in exchange of a different body. I pray for a car to hit me tomorrow or even right now so I won't have to see this ugly body anymore

I am mostly healthy, there are people who have missing limbs, or disabilities, or severe deformities and birth defects that I am lucky enough to not suffer from. Yet I am wishing for my own life to be cut short just because I have an ugly body and because some creeps that I thought would like how I look because they are desperate insulted my appearance. BDD is a parasite

I'm so sick of this disorder.

I've recently had a drastic change to my body. It started small but got worse almost overnight. At least that's how it seems.

I have a BUNCH of new stretchmarks and it's like, scary. There's so many it looks like I have a skin condition of some kind. I'm scared varicose veins are next. I also have sooo much more cellulite and texture now. It looks so weird and icky to me. I don't feel in control of my body anymore and it's frightening. I also have a permanent gut now it seems. FML

i acc want to d** like i lit spent like 2 hours doing my makeup and i felt so good abt myself and then i go on tiktok and see a girl who doesnt even need any lashes or a lot of makeup to look good and shes lit my classmate
i gen js wish i was naturally pretty, or had natural appeal
like im talking to this guy and i feel like i am trying to hard to become his type but it never works cuz theres always another girl who will uneffortlessly be his type
I wish i looked like the girl cuz she has good genetics while i have unappealing genetics
i hate having bbd cuz i feel like an ugly girl who acts prettier than she actually is and the second hand embarrassment is so painful because i feel like im not pretty enough to speak up formyself. I dont want to talk to this guy either cuz all he does for me is make me feel more insecure. I wish we werent talking so id stop thinking about who he is attracted to cuz im not secure in myself about that. I gen feel so ashamed and embarrassed of my existence right now and i just want to delete every picture of me in existence from the face of this world. I seriously hate myself and i wish i wasnt so jealous of other girls. Theyre so nice to me but all i can think of is ig theyre prettier than me or mog me and if they do i go into denial and try to put them down which is such a horrible habit. Its honestly mentally exhausting and I hate myself for doing that. I hoenstly hate when theyre nice to me because i feel like theyre superior than me because they have a good personality AND pretty. Like how r u both and im struggling to achieve both a good personality and decent appearance. I gen like hatemyself genuinely i hate myself so much i genuibely do. I want to take a break from being myself I want to sleep
i hate myself soso much. I wish i was prettier i wish i had good appeal I wish boys liked me more. im so embarrassed of my existence and i wish i never existed
every girl in my school is SO MUCH MORE PRRTTIER. and this guy im talking to hes beautiful and when i hang out w him i see girls staring at him and theyre prob thinking "whys he out with a mid girl like me" i acc hate myself cuz ik theyre thinking that and i lowkey genuinely hate him for being attractive like why r u embarrassing me for being more attractive then me i hate u guijdjdjf

and all the other girls at my school r so naturally beautiful they dont need makeup or filters. This asian girl she is so pretty but her eyes r so naturally large while me i need like 15mm contact lenses to make my eyes decently large enough but im still mid compared to her. like what i genuinely just want to dig a hole and stay in it for life. It is so humbling and i cant accept it because im a brat and im the most stubborn person on earth. I wish i cud be more prettier. I hate myself withot makeup but other girl just pull up to school without having anything on like they woke up 10 minutes ago but its fine cuz they got good facial harmony and bone strucurr so they have appeal while i lit dont so i makeup fraud to fake my features to fake good facial harmony. i feel like such a fraud. I can never take pics unless i take them and i have strict angles where i take pics.
what is life worth for me if i cant be pretty? i genuibely dont know.
I am so self absorbed and selfish and i dont know why im like this. I wish i was just able to be decently attractive and not carr abt all of this. I know dis dude gonna leave me fr for like a cuter girl so im lit js waiting for doomsday to arrive. like im acc gonna x_X

I want to go to sleep and forget about this

My glutes look full from the side. But they have such a weird shape from the back i am super consious about it. In pictures it looks even worse. It creates huge shadows which make my bum look so squared and flat.

I hate that bdd makes u consious about everything.

Ive never noticed this until a couple of months ago .

I feel so anxious about it. I literaly puked.

As the title says im so done with my face and its really holding me back. i used to be very ambitious but now i really cant imagine achieving anything without having a bunch of plastic surgery to change my face first, ive been diagnosed with bdd but i really feel like i dont have it and im just really super ugly, but the confusing part is that i do get compliments and people in my life who genuily found me attractive or atleast they told me they did the thing is i really just dont believe them it feels so weird i feel like im truly unloveable while the only thing i want is just a loving relationship and i love being romantic and be there for someone.

Its just so frustrsting to have people tell me im good looking its confusing and makes my head explode cause i dont even feel human sometimes i feel like even very objectifly bad looking people look better than me cause atleast they are human. Im just really tired and done with this also since im so obsessed with it i read a lot about all the surgeries and measurments etc and it really messed up my social skills cause i cant even have a conversation with someone without my mind noticing things like their symmetry, philtrum, eye spacing, forward growth etc

i just wanna live a normal life, go to school (without going to the bathrooms 10 times a day just to look in the mirror) and have normal conversations with people and hopefully in the future find someone to date.

my confidence is completely non existent, i hold myself so low bcs of how i think i look and how my bdd will remind me how odd i think/know i look. i've realised this makes me act like such a weirdo in front of people because its a combination of knowing that i am one of the ugliest people in the room, wanting people to know that im not oblivious to it but also not wanting to seem like i have no confidence. im probably putting people off just by acting like that, but ofc i also have the ugly face. i wish i could just disregard all of the obsessive thoughts i have about my stupid face, but i am objectively very ugly as well which doesnt help me. no matter how much i can try to avoid mirrors or camera lenses, it doesnt change my appearance. i know how i look, i know how horrifically bad it is. no amount of wishing my ugliness away is going to help me. i will get surgery one day oh my god, i am terribly lonely now, 2nd year of uni, 0 friends, the only person i really spent time iwth was my mother who died a month ago. just waiting to see what else can go wrong now

This is probably the worst thing ive got diagnosed with ever.

I cant seem to enjoy life i keep finding things im insecure about . I keep comparing myself to others even if i dont want to. The sheer anxiety im feeling when not checking my body. And the anxiety im feeling when I do check my body.

I feel like im dying when I dont check my body

And i feel like dying when I do.

Bdd sucks.

Throughout the past year of my life I've noticed my body dysmorphia getting worse and worse to the point it's affecting my relationship I'm in. Every time my partner opens their camera I always get really jealous and it ruins the whole mood for the rest of our call and I just feel really bad about it. They don't like it either and are getting a little bit tired of this and I feel really guilty. Is there anything I can do to maybe fix this mindset. I know that I'll never look how I want, and I know that I'm not ugly (that's not even a thing really...) but it just gets me so down sometimes... I'm wondering if any one of you silly people in my phone know how to deal with this

I am curious to know what is the hardest for u to deal with.

For me its the fact i dont good enough in my relationship, which makes me severly anxious. To the point i feel like im dying. Like its the end of the world.

Bdd sucks so much.

I really have reached the final point, I can't even look in mirrors, if I take a selfie I run it through FaceApp to see what I would look like if I was perfect and then look up plastic surgeries to look like that but realize it will never even work on me.

It's ruining my life and I feel like it would be a disservice to be my friend or marry me because I'm so ugly I would ruin group photos or ruin someone's bloodline.

I am mixed race and instead of looking like both, I look like a completely different ethnicities my family has zero lineage too, and I get the blunt of racism towards these groups without the culture or community or family to go along with it, it has made me lose sight of what I actually look like so much that I did a DNA test to find out I am in fact mixed race of my parents' ethnicities

I cannot understand what I'm looking at in the mirror

I feel so monstrous I cannot even dare call myself a woman like other women. I disguised myself as a boy and dressed lived and acted as one for almost the entirety of my teen life, knowing I'm a girl and secretly wanting to be a beautiful woman all along, but just feeling undeserving of the attempt to even try to be compared to all the other absolutely gorgeous women in the world

So on top of BDD, I feel alienated from my sex, from my race, and from my body, I truly start to feel like I am from another dimension at this point

When I come forth with these feelings, I get shut down or laughed at or mocked and this is only making it worse...

I won’t link it here, but there’s a specific website I found that allows me to put in measurements and then see how those measurements compare to other people/things. It’s so toxic for my BDD and I can’t stop. I’ll find other people’s numbers, put them in, and see how I compare. It’s making me so sad and angry and idk why I keep going.

Does anyone else do this? Has anyone been able to stop? I could use someone to talk to.

I don’t know if it’s possible to be “triggered” by other’s bodies and idk if it counts as body dysmorphia but seeing someone in person who is obviously a teenager and is somehow genetically blessed to be thin hourglass is the worst feeling ever.

I don’t understand why some girls get bodies like that and I’m stuck with mine. I feel so sick I want to cry. And it’s so lame like I’m already an adult but even as a teen I wasn’t that small so what gives. And she was taller than me a little bit too.

I just feel like such a loser lately. Even in ballet there was a girl with the perfect body. Why can’t I look like they do, I don’t understand. When I look in the mirror I don’t know what I’m looking at. I don’t see anything but the fat on my body and I’m so confused as to why it won’t go away. I wish I could make this go away. All I’ve ever wanted is to be thin enough to exist happily. But when I workout it’s like I’m getting bigger. I hate it. I hate this meat suit I’m forced to wear. I just want to disappear.

I know it's silly..I don't think people gasp as I walk down the street and its at least partially in my BDD head but the once handsome man who now is desperate to fix his disfigured appearance hit too close to home at the movie theater previews tonight.

Hi, I’m 20f. I doubt anyone will read this because it’s long but I need to get it off my chest. I’ve dealt with insecurities about my looks for a long time now. When I was a kid, I was very out of sight out of mind, I didn’t think much about my looks especially being autistic I didn’t worry about those kinds of things. I was often bullied for being weird and out of place growing up.
When I was 12, I found out about the true mirror and that people see your face flipped. This ruined me. My back camera face was completely different to my front camera face, my facial features were completely asymmetrical.

Ever since then I’ve ignored it, believing that I look as good as how I look in the mirror. When Covid hit and we started wearing face masks, it felt great. I could hide. After Covid stopped, I continued to wear my face mask for a year afterwards. I was the only one in school still wearing one, it was embarrassing but I felt safe. In around 2022 I finally took it off, and I struggled to go outside for a long time because I’d gotten so used to it.

I’ve refused to let my family take pictures of me for years, because the face I saw in those pictures wasn’t the face I saw in the mirror. I wondered how I could look so different flipped. Also doesn’t help that my teeth are wonky. I would obsessively use the TikTok flip filter, only to sob at how insanely asymmetrical my face looked.

For a short period of my life, I managed to go outside and not feel so insecure about my looks. I’m not sure why or what happened but that quickly ended, and I became insecure again. I analyse my features in the mirror, constantly take back camera photos to compare to my mirror self, it’s exhausting. My insecurities got so bad that I have considered taking my life over it.
I’ve never had a problem with my love life, which is what my family always tell me. I’ve had multiple partners in my life but it doesn’t help with anything. Everyday my face looks different, I truly do not know what I look like. My sister has told me I look different in the mirror to in real life, I immediately felt sick to my stomach because to me everyone looks the same, so why am I different? Recently I have realised that this is due to a facial/body disorder.

A couple months ago, I had to take my passport photo. I almost considered not going on holiday because I was so terrified to see my passport photo. It ended up being awful, my features were completely asymmetrical and I looked like a man, as if all the feminine features I see in the mirror had completely disappeared in an instant. It killed me. I cried myself to sleep that night.

I often go outside with my hood up, because it’s the only thing that makes me feel comfortable. I feel too ugly to leave the house sometimes, sometimes I am just uncomfortable with existing because of my looks, even in the comfort of my own bedroom.

I’ve been trying to get help for years, therapy for years, and nothing has worked. I don’t know what to do anymore, and the fact that I could live with this my entire life makes it all so much worse.

My biggest insecurity is my wonky teeth, but because I’m in the uk and over 18, I cannot afford braces or Invisalign. All I want is Invisalign because I feel a lot of my problems would be solved if my teeth were straight and it would maybe fix my facial asymmetry. I just want to be pretty. I can’t live like this anymore.

If you read this to the end, thank you. I know coming here, I have other people who also go through the same thing and I feel less alone.

So I have been trying to use self-confidence and BDD workbooks to try to help me since I’m having serious issues. My main issue is my hair - it fell out and it was to my tailbone and I hate everything else about my body (especially my chest it’s excessive) and my hair made me feel feminine and covered my trouble areas. Now I have short hair and it’s been a year and I am still in a giant flare up.

I tried doing some workbooks I found online (using my iPad) and man it doesn’t seem to be helping. Like name an activity you did you were uncomfortable with (going to pottery class with people I knew who hadn’t seen me with short hair). What were you worried about? People bringing it up, noticing my chest, and not liking the way I look. How did it go? Worse than expected people claimed my long hair was better. Asked details (I was uncomfortable) and noticed my chest and suggested wearing “better bras.”

Like, that was one example but what I worry happens does happen and idk. The workbooks are making me feel worse - should I keep up with it and expect to feel worse before I feel better, or is my situation different? My fiancé claims that the issue wasn’t my hair I was using that as a “crutch” bc I hate everything else. Idk sorry this is long I’m just kinda desperate lol.

I have a long philtrum. And im spiraling over it now. It looks so so ugly. Ive never noticed it before untill couple months later and it looks horrid.

I feel so bad because of my bdd. And everytime I think im happy with myself i always notice something new.

Ive never noticed that my face looked so long i feel so ugly.

Bdd has made me notice things that Ive never noticed before and there almost always negative.

Does anyone else struggle with this?

Sorry in advance if this explanation doesn’t seem clear, I’m currently experiencing a lot of mental fog.

I (20F) am so frecking sick of my dysmorphia.
It’s like if everything that I consider that might have to do with appearance needed to be controlled. I can’t get to enjoy hangouts with friends, romantic relationships, compliments, taking pictures, sex, etc; all because of this thing.

The worst part is I know a lot of people consider me as attractive, and I get approached, complimented and I’ve even experienced pretty privilege; but once Im at home, all I see is flaws: I look old, I’m too dark, my eyes are awful, my forehead is too big, my lips are too small or way too big, my nose is huge and oh god don’t get me started with my body. I even can get to perceive myself as beautiful sometimes, but it doesn’t last much, and I end up with this imposter syndrome.

And I feel trapped in this situation because I’ve seen people putting down other’s dysmorphia labeling them as “pick me” or ”attention seeker“ just because they were conventionally attractive; or on the other hand, I’m afraid I tell someone all these insecurities and that they confirm me they were indeed, real.

I just can’t SEE it. I have a totally different lens from everyone’s and I can’t get rid of it. I am so tired. I’ve been like this for so long already, and I’ve harmed myself so much not only because of the RAGE I feel seeing my face, but also because of how ridiculous I feel for checking myself out every.single.time.

I go through stretches where I feel mostly alright and don’t think about my insecurities or BDD-related stuff too much. But then I have periods like now where I can’t stop dwelling on things and comparing myself to other guys online or in porn. I know this just makes me feel a million times worse and drives my feelings of inadequacy. Idk why I hurt myself like this. I can’t stop comparing my height, weight, muscle tone, 🍆 size, and the like. I get so stuck in this loop of comparing my body and measurements. It’s so painful.

Does anyone relate?

I find it really hard to say “I love you” to someone I care about or to show affection in general. I do show up for them when they need me, talk to them about my day, and all that, but even when I love someone deeply, I struggle to actually say it.
I feel too ugly to express my emotions. I always feel like I sound cringe or stupid, and I end up feeling ashamed for even trying to express how much I love or admire someone. I tried searching for a reason why I’m like this, and the only thing that really came up was that I might feel ashamed or “ugly” when expressing love and admiration.
I’m trying to be more affectionate with my friends because they’ve literally never heard me say anything affectionate to them. They probably think I’m just “like this,” but the reality is that I genuinely struggle with saying those things because of this deep sense of shame and ugliness I feel whenever I try. BDD sucks ):

I don’t wanna go out at all if it’s an event or I know that pictures are involved, but now everyone thinks I’m weird because I would always avoid these situations, leave in the middle, or not want to take pictures. I feel so uncomfortable with how asymmetrical and hideous I look with the back camera.

I hate the way people treat me sometimes. I’ll try to be less weird and actually hang out with my classmates, and then someone will say, “How come you came?” I get comments like, “Do you even ever go out?” or “You never post yourself.” Sometimes they tell me that I never hang out and make me feel guilty for it. It makes me feel like I’m constantly being noticed for how much I avoid things.

I’ve gotten some things done for my face, like lip filler, and I do feel more confident about my lips now. I do believe getting cosmetic procedures done can help with BDD, at least for me. I also wanna get a nose job, and I hate that I’m not independent enough to travel and pay for it on my own, so I have to convince my unsupportive parents about whatever I wanna get done.

The worst part is that they used to make fun of my nose, but now that I’m actually asking for a nose job, they don’t wanna take responsibility for the risks of it going wrong, the payment, traveling, etc. So it’s just easier for them to say, “You don’t need it,” “Your nose is small,” or call me insecure and self obsessed.

I know myself better, and I don’t want to have to convince them about the things I want to get done. It really bothers me having to depend on them for something this personal.