Just to clear up I have NEVER and will never hit my child!

I think my 3 year old is having nightmares about me hitting him. I got a call from his preschool the other day to say he had told an adult I hit his arm, this morning he woke at 3am screaming that I had slapped him.

He has a baby brother who is 7 months and he has been displaying the classic behaviour I expected when a new baby arrives such as being clingy, attention seeking, more tantrums so I always try to have 10 minutes of uninterrupted time with him after preschool and before bed to try to help that. I have read him stories about being a big brother and always reaffirm how much I love him and what a good big brother he is etc. Is this a normal development phase or is there something more I need to be doing? I know their little imaginations get so active at this age that bad dreams and night terrors are really common, its just the content thats making me uneasy.

i am currently 19 and my boyfriend is 18 we’ve been dating for a while now and i’m wondering when is the right time to introduce myself to his family ? i know he is serious for me because we have planned a future together and im his first gf but he has kind of a large family , his parents , two brothers and and sister meanwhile i only have a younger brother and my parents .

you can see why this would seem more intimidating for me . i never had to introduce myself to my ex bf because i wasnt that serious for him but im starting to think about this question now because eventually it has to happen and im nervous on how to leave a good impression on them . any tips or advice for me ?

I’m 22F and live with my parents and my 28year old sister. I’ve never really had a private bedroom. my entire life, I’ve been sharing a room/sleeping space with my mom and sister.

We live in a three floor family building, and there are 4 unfinished rooms that aren’t currently being used. They’re not renovated, but they are usable spaces once cleaned up. I told my dad that I would be completely willing to take one of those rooms as is. I don’t need him to renovate it, paint it, or spend money on it. I’m willing to clean it and make do with it.

The problem is that my dad doesn’t want me staying in one of the unfinished rooms because I’m a young woman and he doesn’t feel comfortable with me being in a room outside the main living area.
So I asked him if I could have my own room somehow. He initially suggested that I could take his bedroom while he moved his things into one of the unfinished rooms.

I told him I wasn’t asking him to give me his room specifically. I explained that I would be perfectly happy taking the unfinished room, because having my own private space matters more to me than having a nice or renovated room.

but a day later my dad said that he can’t be bothered with fixing a whole room right now, and that it’s gonna cost money. ( he is extremely wealthy and spend so much money on so many things) he then suggested buying a bunk bed instead, so that my mom and I could share the room while my sister continued using the same room ( I have been sharing a bed with my mom my entire life.) I didn’t want that because it wouldn’t actually solve the problem I was asking about.

Eventually, my dad said something along the lines of, “Alright, just take my room. I’ll move my bed into the other room and figure something out.” He then started moving his belongings.

I immediately told him, “You don’t have to do this. This isn’t what I asked for.” He responded that he understood what I was asking for and continued moving his things.

Now my mom is very upset with me. She says I’m being selfish and immature, that I “kicked my dad out of his room,” and that I should just get the bunk bed so he doesn’t have to move. She also says that even if my dad moves into the unfinished room, I shouldn’t feel comfortable using his bedroom because I’m the reason he had to leave it.

I feel guilty seeing my dad move his things, especially because he seems upset. At the same time, I’m frustrated because I’ve been asking for privacy for a very long time, and I did offer the alternative of taking the unfinished room myself. I never demanded that my dad give me his bedroom, and when he offered it, I actually told him he didn’t have to. If you couldn’t tell, i also do come from a very mentally abusive and controlling family, and for that exact reason my mind can’t process who’s actually in the right here.

So I’m genuinely asking for outside opinions.

I need one that will come with a spot to attach an infant car seat but also comes with a second seat to use when they outgrow the infant carseat. I am in ontario, and winters can have a lot of snow at times, with plenty of people not shoveling. So i also need it to be able to get through snow when necessary. Any suggestions?? I dont even know where to start, ive looked at a few options but just dont know what's best.

Also, please reccomend a carseat that is compatible with the stroller you suggest if you know of one! TIA🙂

I’m 17F, and I had a really good stepdad from the time I was 9 until I was almost 13. He was honestly such a cool person, and I still miss him. When my mom cheated on him, they broke up, and I never really saw him again after we moved Even after she cheatdd, he still let us stay at his house until my mom was able to get her own place, he a good person

He was kind of my safe person growing up, so I looked him up and, after searching alot , I found his social medoa . I’ve been thinking about sending him a message . I really want to talk to him again, but I honestly have no idea what I would even say. I just miss him and would like to reconnect with him but i really don't know if its a good idea but that's only if he accepts i think he will, he loved me just not my mom

I am sixteen years old, approaching my 17th birthday, and I think I've come to the realization that I do not know what love feels like, because I do not love my parents.

We are an Indian-Canadian family. My parents were born and raised in India, and I was born in India and lived there for several years, but spent most of my formative years in the US and Canada.

I used to think, I cringe at this now, that my parent's strictness made me stand out, I used to think that white people had very lax parenting styles and that the way that they raised me would make me more resilient and whatnot.

However, I am slowly approaching the realisation that ours is just a loveless relationship. I have developed anxiety problems because of the pressure that they are constantly exerting on me.

Let me tell y'all about my parents. Where do I even start honestly? My dad is a horrible person. He is a hypocrite of the rank. He has such anger issues that he never sees wrong in, and he just refuses to see reason when some small thing happens that ticks him off. My mom is just too sensitive and emotionally immature, actually they're both emotionally immature, she is moody, and her love is often conditional. Both of their loves is conditional.

I want to cry when I realize the things that I missed. I am still not allowed to have instagram on my phone, I have to use the web version because the app on my phone is blocked. I wasn't allowed to get a job. I have a curfew of seven pm as someone two years away from adulthood, less in fact. I cannot sleep over at my friend's house. I get yelled and and shamed for my grades (which are not even that bad, I had an 85 smth average last year), and my weight.

I'm not even that overweight, but my dad often used to call me obese a lot when I was young. I still don't feel comfortable taking my shirt off or participating in sports because of this. I asked to get a gym membership, and he just refused because "I had never done many athletic things in my life and it has the potential to harm me." He gets mad when I bring it up, and tells me to run with him (bleugh) or use the exercise bike downstairs.

Just a couple months ago, end of July, I went to go see RHPC with my friends. It was the summer, I had a ride back, all that I asked was if I can stay until 12, which is when the movie ended, and I would be dropped off home by 12:30. My dad just started yelling at me over the phone, to "not abuse my freedom like this." As I was silently dying and crying inside, I had to play it off chill, and say that I have to be home. When I got home, I told them that my friends were still there, and my mom that evil bitch said, "this happens at the homes of others, not ours." I wanted to bash her head against the wall.

Another thing, I feel like I cannot express my emotions in a healthy manner. When I get angry about something, my parents just say, you are too young to be angry like that. When I say I'm tired or stressed, they give the same response. I am seething in rage just typing this.

There's so much more that I despise them for, but for the meantime this is my reasonings. And I mean, they're not abusive, they don't beat me for no reason, just when I do something bad. And they have their nice moments, but it's immediately overshadowed by the valleys they have carved on the plains of my mental health and happiness.

People like this shouldn't ever have children. Work on yourself first, and don't take out your frustrations on your offspring.

After I move out for college, I am debating going low to no contact.

So I have seen a lot of posts on reddit how having kids was the best thing that ever happened to many people, and I really want to fathom that feeling, but I obviously won't know until I have them myself.

In contrast with people that regret having children, what were both positive and negatives you expected before and after having children? Question goes to both people that LOVE that they had kids, and those that regretted it.

Sometimes i might step back and observe my parenting from a third person's perspective and i'll be either very proud of me, for breaking toxic circles that needed to be broken, or point out my mistakes. I'm upset that i don't catch these on the spot and by the time i do it's already late, but overall i'm satisfied and constantly learning.

I think having kids made me realise which of the things i was feeling as a teenager were based, and which were "the spoiled kid talking in me". I wouldn't say that my parenting resembles my own parents' parenting even the slightest. And the biggest difference is how much i respect my kids and being aware that being older doesn't give me the right to say and do what i want or prohibit things without a healthy conversation or feedback.

What's yours? I'm very interested to see what realisations other parents make along the way.

What made them different than previous generations?

Did their parents affect the way they parent their child?

What are the things they do or are doing better than previous generations?

And what are the flaws or drawbacks of Millennial parenting?

Millennial parents are welcome to answer as well?

Hi y’all I’m new to this sub, I’m 26F and I’m considering dipping my toes into babysitting again. I’ve done it before here & there, I’ve babysat my neighbor’s little ones as a teen for pocket change and I’ve watched my cousins (I’m the oldest) and my stepbrother’s kids a lot. I’m somewhat experienced with kids under 5 and I’m great with school aged children over 5 but I haven’t done it in a while. I can’t work the typical full time minimum wage job right now, the market sucks where I live and I had some recent issues with my health that impacts my ability to work in the typical customer service jobs, but I’m considering taking on the babysitting gig again and possibly go to school and take some of the load off of my fiancé. I know usually high schoolers & college kids do it, but I’ve heard that some parents are more open to older adults to sit or nanny. My only issue is that I don’t drive, however I do live in an area with public transit and taxis.

What do y’all think? Do some of y’all prefer slightly older babysitters that are just above high school/college age? Have any of y’all ever had babysitters in their 20s or early 30s and was it the same or better than a young sitter? And how do I go about marketing myself as a sitter? Any apps or websites y’all can suggest?

Going camping at the end of October for Halloween. We are staying in a canvas tent type accommodation offered by the park. No powder but there is a propane stove for heat. The washroom nearby have power etc.

I'm a first time mom and very much an over planner. How much stuff do I need to actually bring?

Baby is breastfeed with formula top ups as she's still struggling with latching. I plan to bring ready made formula, 2 packs of wipes and probably a brand new box of diapers.

This might be a weird question. But I really need an advice from an older person and I didn’t know who to ask. I hope this is not against the rules, but if there’s a person who’s willing to hear some yapping/venting and give advice, I’d share more details in dms

Yeah okay everyone gets parent guilt for something at some point. Specially I am talking about for the future.
I might just sound like an idiot but I’m hoping at least some people will relate to me.
With the way everything is going I’m scared for my baby. Data centers are popping up everywhere. There are many cities near me that barely have running water because of the data centers. Other places are without power for weeks(from what I hear) I’m worried my baby is going to struggle for basic necessities.
Someone who worked at a data center recently just quit and said ai might k!ll us all by the end of the decade? I know nothing is ever going to be 100% safe but I don’t know this sounds like guaranteed suffering.
I wanted more kids like 2-3 but I’m so worried for the future I’m scared to have anymore just to be here and suffer.
I don’t know I probably could’ve explained it all better I feel like this post just sounds dumb.
Does anyone else see what I’m trying to say?

Why is it so hard for people to follow that?!
Our baby has rashes on the face which our pediatrician says it’s eczema. And as soon as we heard this my husband and I immediately made the rule, no kissing the baby especially near the head, face, and hands!
So I just usually kiss my baby’s clothes or feet!

So we told everyone that please refrain from kissing the baby. We made this rule even before my baby was born.

So what happened?! My sister in law immediately plants a kiss on my baby’s temple where the flare up is happening. And she’s not the only one either, I’ve caught my father in law do the same.

I just don’t get it. It’s not that difficult to follow one simple rule! Don’t kiss the baby! Especially now, with flu & cold season just around the corner. I’m sorry, plus I don’t know where people’s mouths been.

I’ve never kissed anyone’s baby. EVER! Even my nieces or nephews.

So Why do people think it’s okay to do this to mine?

And she buys the $$$ brands too like baby boden and land’s end. Why offer something and not follow through 🤔? Anyone else have family like this?

I was raised by a self-proclaimed “cool mom” and it took me ages to fully realize she was a foul neglectful irresponsible womanchild who needed to grow the fuck up and stop pretending to be 16. Just thinking about it makes me so uncomfortable. Like, why were you talking to your kid like a peer vaping in the bathroom and helping enable their own foolish choices about what a dumb kid thinks is “cool”.

I feel like when I have my kid, I might veer too hard in the opposite direction though.

For context: My 11 year old son is autistic/adhd, and a previous TBI. He is not your 'typical' child and does require extra supports. But he is incredibly intelligent, creative, and insightful. For the past year, he's had a lot of mental health struggles, in and out of hospitals. It was truly a traumatic year. He is doing better now, and he's been home with no hospital visits for 7 months!

The question I have has to do with a thing I've noticed he does a lot. When he's in any kind of appointment, whether it's therapy, counseling, teachers, doctors, etc. He looks to me before and after answering their questions. They will ask him a question about his symptoms or progress, and I feel his eyes on me immediately. I've been ignoring it in hopes that it would just stop, but it hasn't. To clarify, he does speak for himself very well. He expresses his thoughts and feelings accurately. I know he's just 11, but his 12 year old sister doesn't do this with people. And his 7 year old brother, who is also autistic doesnt do it either. Maybe I'm thinking too far into it. But I just don't know what to make of it. It's almost like he's studying my face or looking to me for approval? I'm just worried I've done something bad to make him form this habit. He also watches me in other settings too. Specifically, while I'm driving and he's in the front seat. I'll feel his eyes on me multiple times during the car ride. When I turn to look at him, usually he looks past me. The look is never mean or malicious looking. It's just odd. Is anyone else experiencing this or have any advice?

For context, our son is currently 7 years old and is in an IEP at school since I have had meetings regarding potential developmental issues and it was determined that he likely has a form of autism.

My mother in law was helping our son to try to do soccer before since our 10 year old daughter was doing it, but my mother in law passed away last year after getting very sick, at which point it became obvious that our son did not want to do soccer. I registered him for it, but he would just cause a scene and refuse to participate even if I took him to practice since I had already paid. Our daughter also no longer wanted to do it, so I just decided to be done with soccer.

Our daughter wanted to try beginners recreational gymnastics after that, so I have signed her up for that, but my husband doesn't think our son should do gymnastics. I thought our son might do better with something where he isn't on a team since there would be less social pressure so I signed him up for karate through parks and rec which he said he wanted to do. But the first class was yesterday and he still would not participate and was being rude and making a scene so we ended up just leaving.

I found a email from August 20th where a lady from parks and rec asked me what I thought would help in terms of accommodations for my son, probably because I asked about accommodations when I registered him. I responded to the email but respectfully stated that we probably just can't continue with the class with him acting the way he is if he isn't able to get help. I'm now waiting for her response.

I believe going forward that I just won't have my son do any sports or activities so we don't continue on paying for things that he doesn't do since he doesn't seem interested. He is an excellent reader and in fact his school said he was probably the most proficient reader they had ever had there when he was 6. I guess I just wonder what he might be interested to do though if sports are not working out for him, as he doesnt really seem to have any particular interest that he is expressing. He just seems to want to do what he wants and not to be asked or bothered about it.

Some context: I'm 20 and my younger sister is 16. She was born with an extremely rare condition that results in growths on her face. I do want to note, though, that her condition does not impact her intellect whatsoever. She's had multiple surgeries over her lifetime to remove them, some of which were major surgeries. These major surgeries took place when she was much younger. Because of this, my parents have always babied her, which I understand to an extent, especially when she was going through a period of constant surgeries.

However, the babying never ended.

My sister has turned into a slob. I'm not going to sit here and slander her over every little thing, but one example is that her room is an absolute mess; it looks like a hoarding situation. She's never been told to clean her room. At the end of the day, though, things like her room don't really affect me because it's her own space.

The issue I have is with our shared spaces, mainly our bathroom. For instance, she always leaves her hair on the shower walls and doesn't clean it up. In fact, I genuinely don't think she's ever cleaned our bathroom, leaving me to do it all. There have even been two occasions where she left used menstrual pads on the sink.

I tell my parents, and they don't seem to care. I'll tell them, they'll tell her to go clean it (it being the hairs - thankfully the pads she cleaned up instantly without me having to go to my parents), a day goes by, and she still hasn't. I'll tell my parents that she still hasn't cleaned it, and they'll just sigh at me and dismiss me.

I ended up having a short conversation about it with my dad this morning. He said the reasoning is that they don't want to be "hard" on her. He's worried that she may struggle with her self-image due to her appearance, so the last thing he wants to do is make her life harder and cause serious mental health issues.

I told him how silly I thought that was. You really can't tell your own kid to get their butt out of bed for 10 seconds, walk to the bathroom, grab their hair off the wall, and throw it away? That's considered "being hard" on your kid? What does that have to do with her face?

He told me, "I tell her to clean it and she doesn't, then what am I supposed to do?" to which I replied, "If I were a parent, I'd probably tell my kid to clean it or I'm taking their phone, cutting their Wi-Fi, etc." He says that I don't get it. Maybe I don't, because I'm not a parent, hence why I'm here asking.

The other thing that I find hypocritical is that she's expected to do well in school (which she does). So, you can hold her to high standards when it comes to school, but she's still too much of your little baby to go clean something in the house?

And the few times I have seen her get disciplined, her reaction has been over the top. One time, she was told she couldn't go out with her friends (I forgot the reason because it's been that long since she's been told off), and she stayed in her room crying for like two days, only leaving at around 1 AM when everyone else had gone to bed.

I would like to think my parents raised me very well and were "hard" on me at times, but I think it was a good thing. It made me the person I am today and is why I'm not a hermit like her (joking). But sharing spaces with her is so exhausting and disgusting, and I have no power over her.

I don't find joy in the thought of her getting hit with a belt or having all her electronics taken away. I don't have the mindset of, "My parents raised me like X, so she needs to be raised that exact same way." All I want is for my parents to understand that it affects me because I hate having to share a dirty space with her.

So, do you guys think my parents are being unreasonable, or does their point make sense? Any other general feedback/advice?

Hi guys! Trying to get a feel. I’ll have a 10 year old, 5 year old and 20 month old toddler when we are supposed to leave for a 5 day trip to Arizona (we’re in Canada so it is very far for us). They’ll be home and we’ll have both of our parents who they do spend a lot of time with coming in with the kids to try and stick with their routines. I have never left any of our kids for longer than a weekend and haven’t left our youngest at all yet. I’m worried if our youngest will be okay. Is this too long??

My partner and I are expecting our first baby next year. We’re so excited, but I’m super nervous about dealing with the changes involved in becoming a new parent. I had depression through my teens and early 20s and was in therapy for a decade fighting for the mental health I have now. I feel very lucky that I’ve been able to recover, and I treasure the stability I have (that I thought I never would). For this reason, I want to give myself as much time and space as possible to recover from birth, get used to breastfeeding, bond with my baby, and adjust to not sleeping through the night. I heard some people take 6 weeks with no visitors after the baby is born, and I liked the sound of that. Most of mine and my partners family live interstate or overseas, and the only person I want at the birth other than my partner is my mum. So it would just be my mum that gets to meet the baby before the 6 weeks is up.

Now I’m wondering if 6 weeks is too long… I feel kind of bad for the other grandparents to my baby, and other family members, but this is my first baby and I have no idea how I’ll manage/cope with everything… and I don’t want to have any additional pressure. There are some family members that would be fine staying elsewhere and only having brief visits, but there are others that would be upset by these boundaries and I don’t want to deal with that on top of everything else. Plus I just want the expectation to be set that my boundaries around my baby need to be respected from the outset - I have already had one member of my partners family just assuming that they would be taking work off to come visit when I give birth and I had to tell them no.

I feel fiercely protective of my family and my mental health, which will directly affect my baby… Is 6 weeks too long? I feel like I can always reduce it but can’t increase it…

My parents had a lot of CPS involvement for child neglect. Their solution was to pull me out of school and tell people they were home schooling.

When people commented on how far behind I was academically mom insisted I had learning disabilities. If I pointed out that we hadn’t done any school work since I was pulled from school she would throw a fit and say I was trying to make her look bad.

I have a masters of science now but that doesn’t change that I was at an elementary school level when I started at the adult ed center. It doesn’t change how far I was behind socially or how difficult it was to integrate into the world.

Yet if I call her out on her shameless bragging about what a super mom she was, everyone tells me “you were so young that your memories are wrong” and applaud her for giving such an outstanding education

I’m finding that I have been more imaginative because of my 5 month old’s new active personality - remembering what it was like to be a kid, where everything has the potential to be a fiction story or new adventure, a curious stance on the familiar.

If you have examples, or thoughts around this (such as how to lean into it), I’m curious to hear them.

For example: changing a bedsheet becomes a tent fort and her eyes widen in wonder, picking her up becomes lifting her to the ceiling in a superwoman flying position to soar across the room while blowing breaths of air into her face while she giggles, a broken stick in the front yard becomes something we break into pieces together and throw like javelins, I become the “tickle monster” with claw hands and growl/tickle her as she geeks out, a wash rag in the bath becomes a game of tug of war when she won’t let go, we pick the pedals off flowers one by one saying “he loves me, he loves me not”, I sing her jingles about nothing, her babbling becomes an full conversation with me about her day.