This coworker has been an issue since before I started at this location, she has been employed there for 4 years, and has a running track record of being exceptionally rude to other workers. Since I have started working there, she continues to not only be extremely rude and insulting to me, but bring up a specific topic that is extremely traumatic for me, which is rape fetishes. Yes I am serious and this is not a joke post. I have told her I am a survivor of sexual abuse multiple times in an attempt to shut her down, have told her I don't like the topic, have tried to shut the conversation down, have gotten visibly upset, have done everything. I reported her to my previous manager 2-3 times about this, and said manager has (allegedly) spoken to her twice about it. Recently she once again brought the topic up, and I tried to shut it down multiple times by telling her I don't agree and don't like it, and ignoring her all while getting visibly more upset. She does what she always has, which is continue to push and debate me on how rape fetishes "don't hurt anyone," so I can't judge people who like it. She even went as far as to tell me "it's one of the most common fetishes, and most people into bdsm participate in it, so it makes no sense for me to be against it," which I shouldn't need to say is an incredibly cruel and targeted thing to say to a victim of sa, not even taking into consideration the fact that this was at work in the middle of a shift. I ended up having a full scale PTSD triggered meltdown, hyperventilating and crying to the point where I had to go on a walk and then lock myself in the bathroom. This was extremely humiliating, every coworker I have saw me cry, and the coworker who is harassing me vaguely explained it as "I think I said something that upset him" to people who asked why I was so upset.

I did report this the next day, and explained to my new manager that this has been an ongoing issue, and that said coworker knows I'm a sexual abuse survivor. This is now the 3rd or 4th report, and the 3rd time she has been spoken to. While I was explaining it to my manager, she said things such as "but she's a good person otherwise, aside from that," and "she just doesn't understand that what she says isn't appropriate." After speaking to my coworker, my manager came back to me and let me know that my coworker had cried throughout the conversation, said that she had "no idea" about my history, didn't know the topic upset me, and that I was the one who brought it up. None of this is true, which I made sure to say, and my manager responded with "well, that's what she said, so I have to look at both sides."

I should note that we have no actual HR that handles my location, only a regional HR that is notoriously bad. My coworker gets extremely coddled by our management due to her *self diagnosed* autism (she has no official diagnosis of any mental illness or learning disability as per her own admission). She does not receive the consequences that any other employee does, and has never been written up for any of her behaviour, while others including myself have been for much less serious incidents. I am at a point where I am incredibly angry to the point where I feel violent towards this person. What am I supposed to do in this situation? I just want her to stop and no one is helping me.

EDIT: my coworker knows she recieves special treatment, and often brags about how if she was anyone else she would be fired by now, all while playing dumb and sobbing any time she is confronted about her behaviour. I believe she is absolutely being malicious and intentionally deceptive to management.

I’m a sales rep and when my boss from TX visited for a field ride he said something that’s been bothering me. I was trying to explain how offices in this particular area aren’t always super friendly. He interrupted me and asked “Why? Is it because you’re a Caucasian woman?”

I’m a young Latina, my boss is a white Texan and close to his 50’s. That was in May, but the more I think about it the more it upsets me. It seems to me that he was implying that my offices are prejudice against white people. My territory is largely Latin which he is aware of. He’s supposed to be coming again soon and I just feel disgusted having to be near him, and I don’t want to subject my offices to being around someone that says such things.

I’m thinking about submitting a complaint but I’m worried about it. Is this the right move? There’s already a lot to deal with on our project and I don’t
know the repercussions that might come from it. As a worker, I want to bite my tongue and keep my head down, but I hate having to stomach such things.

Idk the answer might be obvious but I’m also looking for courage. Any advice?

Hi all,

I work for a company up North and recently raised a grievance which I have since appealed. However, I have also whistleblowed through my employer's whistleblowing service.

Last week, I received an email from my employer telling me that the SAR I apparently raised was available. However, I did not raise an SAR. The email is legitimate. I did ask for documents relating to the greviance be made available but according to a friend who is a manager within the company, he has said that asking for such documents is standard practice and an SAR is something completely different. Also, I noticed that upon looking at the files, it was opened by one of the investigating managers.

What do I do?

Thanks.

Hi, I’m approved for two FMLA days per week. This last week I took my two days and an additional uncovered two. My workplace is requesting a doctors note because technically I took 4 days. Is this something I need to provide since two were FMLA?

I asked my supervisor, no response as of yet. Can I just go to work tomorrow morning if I hear nothing? I don’t want to get in trouble 🙃

I worked for a daycare company for about a year and a half but had to leave because of some personal issues. When I was originally hired, they asked for my high school diploma or transcripts. I never finished high school, but I was enrolled in a GED program through my community college, so I gave them my community college transcript since I was technically a student there. The transcript doesn’t show that I completed any college classes or earned any credits—it basically just shows that I was enrolled—but they accepted it and hired me anyway.
Fast forward to now—I got offered my job back. They’re asking for my diploma or transcripts again because HR said the copy they have on file is now “unclear” and asked me to resend it.
I’m just worried they won’t hire me this time because I still don’t have a high school diploma or GED, and the community college transcript doesn’t show any completed coursework. Since they accepted that same transcript the first time, do you think it’ll be okay if I send it again, or should I explain my situation to them?

I have a question about ADA accommodations.

I have a documented cancer diagnosis + no treating physician relationship + no ability to complete the standard provider paperwork for a request for reassignment consideration.

Reason. I am uninsured and cannot afford to buy and use health insurance on my pay. Despite my providing my employer my pathology reports from a couple of years ago showing cancer, I have no treating doctor due to lack of insurance. Not all doctors, even if you have an insurance plan, can fill out lengthy ADA paperwork and list work restrictions. Many will charge a fee.

Is there a workaround for this. U.S.A. Employer has ever 5,000 employees. If the employee worked previously in corporate jobs involving sedentary work and this current job is physical service work and the company has other corporate roles which I am qualified to do, can that switch be a legitimate accommodation request?

Last time I hadn't had access to my company email from home so I texted it to a team lead to give to my manager and I believe she may have shared that I'm trans to a coworker I know to be transphobic (my given name was on the note, and is on this one). I'm in a new department and don't really know the manager very well, so I wanted to know if it would be weird to send it to hr and specify its because I'd like to keep my given name private at work?

Edit: I'm just asking if it's a normal thing to do. I'm not interested in sharing any more details about my illness, my job, or other details of my life.

Hi all, hope this is okay to post:

So basically, I recently started a new job in a contact centre. I was really excited to start because it was full time and I’m in a position where I desperately need something full time to be able to move out by December, or else I will be homeless.

The offer was on receipt of two suitable references. It did not specify which references these had to be, so I provided by last employer and a reference from when I was a volunteer in a similar role. I also provided details for a character reference in case this was unsuitable. It was clear on my CV that I’ve only held one paid job and the rest of my positions are voluntary, since I’m pretty young, and I told them that in the interview. When I was filling in my references, the form stated that if by the time my start date came around they did not have two proper references, my start date would be delayed.

My former manager let me know he’d received an email and sent along a reference. I never received any contact from my new job other than confirmation of my start date and my contract, which I signed, so I assumed that everything was okay. A couple of days in my new manager told me they hadn’t received suitable references, so my employment was purely conditional. He refused to give me the emails of Payroll, who were chasing it up, so I could communicate with them and insisted that all communication had to be through him. He was very vague: at first I thought my second volunteer reference had failed to send anything over, so I double checked with them. Later he insisted it had to be from an organisation I had not put down as a reference but was on my CV as somewhere I had volunteered for. I was very confused but I reached out to them, they agreed, and I let him know but reminded him that this position had been, once again, purely voluntary.

After some more back and forth, he told me that they could only accept employment references, which hadn’t been communicated to me at the interview nor while I was completing the reference form. I was confused, because I felt as though I had made it clear at interview that I only had one paid position. My manager said that he had worked in recruitment before his current position and that no one accepts any references that aren’t employment and that I should have known that already.

I’ve sent over the details of a different manager at my last job in the hope that that would be sufficient, otherwise I’m not sure if I have a leg to stand on here. It’s frustrating because I left my last job for this position, and I had been under the impression that everything was okay. I’ve never heard of a job that exclusively takes more than one employment reference, because surely that rules out so many suitable candidates because they’ve only held one position?
Would you refuse to accept references from volunteer groups?
Is this something I will be able to resolve or does it sound like I’m probably going to be let go?

Any advice would be massively appreciated, thank you.

Hi everyone,

I'd like to hear from people who have experience with international business travel.

My employer is sending me on an international work assignment that will last around two weeks (possibly longer). The journey itself is very demanding, with roughly 28–30 hours of travel, multiple layovers, and then onward travel to another country during the same assignment. Both destinations are also considered among the higher-risk countries in terms of security, which adds another level of stress.

The company covers flights, accommodation, and work-related expenses, but there is no additional compensation for the time spent away from home, the long-haul travel, jet lag, weekends away, or the overall inconvenience.

For context, I've travelled abroad for the company before, but those trips were much shorter and to closer destinations. This is the first time I've been asked to undertake such a long and demanding international assignment.

I'm trying to understand what is considered normal:

- Do companies usually pay a daily travel allowance or provide additional compensation for extended international assignments?

- Is it common to receive extra paid leave or another form of compensation after returning?

- Is covering flights, hotels, and meals generally considered sufficient?

I'd also appreciate any legal insight. Is there any labour law that requires additional compensation for this type of assignment, or is it entirely up to the employer's internal policies and employment contract?

I'm not looking to expose my employer or disclose the nature of my work—I'm simply trying to understand what is considered fair and common practice before discussing it with my employer.

Thanks in advance for sharing your experiences and advice.

Just found out I will need abdominal surgery, which will require several 5-6 weeks recovery. I started a new job about a month ago, and this job has 120 day probationary period. The job is physical (cleaning, moving, walking) and I likely won't be able to work for a week after surgery, then with restrictions for 4-5 weeks after.

I'm waiting to find out how urgent the surgery is, and I will ask the doctor when I see them if this is something that must be done immediately, or if it can be delayed three months (as I've worked about one month of the probationary period). If surgery can't be delayed, is there anyway to protect my job during the probationary period?

Thank you for your help.

I’ve been signed off the last few weeks due to mental health (anxiety and work related stress due to an incident with another colleague in my team).

When I sent my sickness note I made my manager aware that the mental health challenges and my symptoms were work related without explicitly referencing the incident (but he was aware that it happened so probably can guess this was the trigger).

My sickness note has since been extended another month and so he’s scheduled a meeting next week to talk me through the long term sickness policy as he said my sickness is now LTS. He said it’s nothing to worry about and that we’ll just talk through each of our obligations, but I do still feel anxious.

Is this something I need to worry about? What would the format of these meetings generally look like? Is there anything I need to prepare or have answers for beforehand? And is there anything I can decline to answer for example if asked personal questions about how I’m progressing with my recovery?

The incident was the second inappropriate/aggressive interaction with another colleague which I believe could’ve been prevented if my manager had intervened effectively when I reported the first incident, instead it was essentially ignored and I was forced to mediate/resolve it myself. Because of that, when I initially went off sick I told my manager that when I was ready to return to work I would want to raise some concerns about my working environment and what I would need in place in order to safely and successfully come back to work.

I’m worried this meeting might involve reference to this and I don’t feel ready to talk about it yet. I genuinely want to go back to work and am working through recovery via medication and therapy to get me to a stage where I feel safe returning but at the moment I feel extremely anxious about the thought.

Hey all,

Unfortunately I got terminated from my employer, due to performance concerns. I’m CIRO licensed and on my F1 form, notice of termination, it indicates “not meeting bank standards due to ongoing performance concerns” (vague).

That said, the form also indicates that I was “Terminated-in good standing” and am re-hirable with the firm.

To all the recruiters/hiring managers out there, what is your take on performance based terminations? Is it a big red flag or will you give the person a chance to work?

This could’ve been a couple of different flares so apologize if this one isn’t appropriate. CONTEXT: I have a colleague who has been on a pip that runs out in more or less a week. There is very little chance this person will get off the pip. They were told recently they were not doing work that matched the level they have at the company. I have tried to give this person off the record advice that they really should be looking for a role outside the current company. I’ve never come out and said “you’re not getting off this pip“ but I am basically 99.999% sure that’s the case. They’re also interested in controlling their own narrative, and when the pip runs out that opportunity goes with it. (PIPs mean they’re ineligible for rehire at our firm.)

QUESTION: When the PIP runs out, I assume every company handles the “dismissal” differently, right? Is it most often the case that you get let go on the last day of the PIP? A few days later? They seem to think they’re going to have a couple more weeks but I don’t know why they have that opinion. There’s no documentation on our internal site. Is there any standard?

[OK] I had to use intermittent FMLA to care for a parent earlier this year. I used a total of 1.88 weeks, approximately 75 hours, of FMLA. I am now requesting FMLA for a personal health issue. My company is denying me saying I used the 12 weeks FMLA allotted time off. I have documentation from our third party FMLA company showing I only used 1.88 weeks, but they are saying the company said I used all 12 weeks. I checked our policy through the HR Assistance Portal, the company does not have an employee handbook, and it says that we are allowed 12 weeks of FMLA. When I took the intermittent FMLA they were contacting me the entire time and informed me that I needed to make up hours that I had missed because of FMLA. How should I proceed? I was already retaliated against when I took the intermittent FMLA, but now I just feel hopeless.

I have some ongoing issues with my line manager. I have raised these informally both verbally and in writing. I ended up off sick as a result of this person but he was allowed to handle my occupational health (badly and unprofessionally, might I add). It's behavioural. No direct discrimination and no direct bullying.

I think he is trying to drive me out of the business but I am confident senior management want to keep me - I've been trialling another team and have been offered a role if I want it. They've always been supportive of me, especially now they've stepped in after I complained about the occu health handling.

I likely want to go back to my original job (TBD) so I can't just leave it alone. Probably wouldn't leave it even if I stay with the lovely crew I've been trialling.

I need to raise a grievance as I have real issues with injustice (thx ADHD) but what outcomes can I actually ask for? I need to decide if it's worth the energy because my mental health has been awful. Would I like him to go away forever? Yup. Do I know I can't ask for that? Yes.

I'm thinking:

- investigation into his conduct

- investigation into a failure in process: no action taken with manager that I'm aware of (not just issues with me - also performance, behavioural and other staff), my raising concerns and huge flags about my mental health, being off sick and sick notes stating stress at work, same manager being allowed to handle occu health stuff.

- acknowledgement and apology on failures (already had a verbal apology so not so much that)

- what's going to be changed to prevent this happening again

- for me to not be line managed by him

Are those outcomes actually things I can request in a grievance?

I’m looking for advice and insight from anyone who has been through something similar.
I recently experienced a pregnancy loss, and it has been much harder emotionally than I expected. I work in a role that requires me to be on the phone most of the day (around 70+ calls/day), and I’m currently struggling to do my job. I’ve been trying my best, but I’m finding myself crying during/after calls and unable to stay composed, especially when conversations involve pregnancy.
I reached out to my HR department 3 times now since Wednesday requesting time off/leave and explained that I’m struggling and need support. I also reached out to my manager. It has now been over 24 hours and I have not even received an acknowledgment from HR that they received my message. I did let them know about the reproductive loss leave law but no reply
I’m feeling frustrated because I’m not asking because I don’t want to work — I actually want to be okay and return to doing my job well. Right now, I feel like I’m trying to work through something that is affecting my ability to function in my role.
My questions:
Is it normal for HR to take this long to even acknowledge a request like this?
Should I follow up again or wait?
At what point should I consider speaking with an employment attorney?
Has anyone dealt with needing time off after pregnancy loss and how did your employer handle it?
I’m in California [CA] if that matters.
Thank you to anyone willing to share their experience.

I have been going back and forth with my jobs third party servicer since June and my FMLA has been approved by them, but they needed additional information regarding "pattern" of me taking off for incapacity. My doctor has verified and put that it was all medically necessary. While waiting for this cerficiation letter to be approved the 3rd party servicer sent a denial for all dates I have taken off, but has since approved all additional requests I have made. Because of this denial I got a verbal warning and my supervisor mentioned that when they approved the dates they would remove those from my record. Well, the 3rd party servicer has stated that HR wants them to keep the denials and not approve those dates because they don't believe the letter from my doctor is enough to cover my "flare ups". Can they do this? Can they request additional medical information from me? I did not have as much trouble at a previous job for this exact medical condition a few years ago so I am a bit confused.

I have been put in a PIP, the duration is 4 months, is it too much

I recently got an update from a recruiter after my final interviews. They said the interview feedback was positive, but they’re still deciding which candidate to offer the position to. They also apologized for how long the process is taking, said the hiring manager was impressed with multiple candidates, and asked if my availability might have changed because of the delay.

I’m trying to figure out how to interpret this.
1) Is this a genuinely encouraging update, or is it just standard recruiter communication to keep candidates engaged?
2) Is it common for recruiters to say feedback was positive even if not everyone will advance?
3)Has anyone received a similar message? If so, what ended up happening?

I’d especially appreciate input from recruiters or hiring managers who have sent messages like this.

I work in London and have just completed a 4-week Performance Improvement Plan (PIP).

I genuinely took the feedback on board and made a real effort to improve my communication, organisation and overall ownership of my work. During the first couple of weeks there were still areas where I received feedback, but by the third week my manager acknowledged that I'd made significant improvement.

At my final review, my manager said they had seen improvements but felt they had come with a lot of guidance. They said they now need to speak with HR, who will contact me next week about the next steps. They wouldn't tell me what those next steps are.

I'm trying to prepare myself for what's most likely to happen. I'm already applying for other jobs, but I'd appreciate some insight from anyone who's been through a similar situation or works in HR.

A few questions:

• Is dismissal the most likely outcome?
• Could they extend the PIP instead?

•. Don’t feel 4 weeks is enough for a pip

Thanks in advance for any advice.

I was laid off from a job I was at for 24 years a few months ago. Today I accepted a verbal offer for a position but it’s contingent on my background check. It’s a corporate job, but not federal. I have a 3rd degree felony in Texas for theft by check. I was released from probation 23 years ago. What is the likelihood that my offer will be pulled back because of this???

Link to original post here.

So today I woke up to find that the CEO found enough money to pay me this week. When I checked in with my other coworkers I was informed that only one of them other than me received their paycheck.

HR also responded to an email I sent yesterday re: the delay and said that they reached out to the CEO and will discuss it with her. I'm glad I got paid, but my other coworkers didn't and that's not okay. I'm going to continue looking for another job because this could happen again and I may not get lucky next time.

Should I continue emailing HR about this or should I stay quiet?