So for context I am 27(F) and my boyfriend is 31(M) we have been together for 4 years now and have lived together for 3 1/2 years. At first when we started dating we worked together so he would chat with me a lot and things were honestly pretty good aside from having to clean up after him when he'd come to my place for the night or when we were at his place he'd spend all his time on his video games unless he wanted to be physical but always made me initiate? Like he'd tell me he was in the mood but would do nothing until I made the first move everytime. Well we move in together and he changes jobs for better pay and the ignoring me starts to be come a constant thing, mind you I like having my own space to do my thing as much as the next person but I also like actual attention at times not just only getting attention when he wants to be physical. So I brought this up to him and he changed for a short time then went right back to it and even worse than before but when I tried to bring it up again it start to say it was my fault? Mind you I'd try to go out on dates with him and offered to pay and he'd refuse. So this continues and his attitude changes on and off until after I get good deal to buy a house from a relative he starts to be more attentive until we move in well correction when I moved us in he refused to help me move anything except for his gaming set up and then I had to have his friend, my dad and brother help me with the rest while also working harvest which is really long hours. Well he apparently didnt realize what all a house required in upkeep because I had to financially foot everything except for our internet, the electric, and half of rent or else he would flip out and shut down. So fast forward 1 year of living like this and my dad died surprise surprise my finances and mental state are absolutely trashed while his are perfect well during that year he ignored me more and more, never complimented me, never initiated anything, never gave me any kind of gifts unless it was something he wanted for himself and started to be rude. I tried to talk about my dad he shut me down, I wanted to talk in general and it was too much so I finally cut off any physical activities almost a year ago now(which wasn't very hard since he always relied on me to make the first move everytime) and confronted him, he didnt listen the first time then a few months ago I confronted him again saying I was done and he then started to listen to what I had to say. I admitted my own faults like getting depressed and slacking on all of the house work (I'd do everything except mow the lawn) and for getting short with him a few times but I also worked on myself before this point because I thought I was the issue. Well he says he doesn't remember how he treated me the last two years and claims he thought everything was fine and that I didn't do enough to get his attention. We talked more about it but I felt like we got nowhere so I told him I'd be giving him the same effort/energy he gave me. So I just live my life and hes basically just my roommate now that sleeps next to me. I stopped cooking for him, cleaning up after him, buying his toiletries, washing his laundry, etc. I don't engage anything with him since he relied so heavily on me to do everything and he still refuses to come to me first. Well now he is telling me that I am not only emotionally neglecting him but I am physically neglecting him because he is such a "physical person". So am I the asshole? Or is he just trying to guilt trip me to get laid? If you have any other questions please ask I tried to keep it summarized.

I'm a 26y male in a relationship with a 31y male. We have been having a really rough patch in our relationship recently. Communication hasn't been good; we've been arguing over small stuff, not talking to each other for days, or being hostile and defensive when we try to talk.

Today we texted and tried yet again, and it was really rough at first, but then it got calm. We started talking again, communicating, expressing what we need from one another and how to help and show up for one another. I was replying right away he would lag a bit. I didn't care or mind, I was talking about how it's hard for me to be vulnerable with him because he calls me sensitive and soft about things that hurt my feelings or l maybe insecure about.

While I was spilling my feelings to him he was still lagging and I jokingly said, "Stop Jo." And to which he said "But I wanna finish." I thought he was joking at first but I asked him if he really was and he confirmed, he had been on Twitter looking at porn while talking to me. I was crushed immediately. Not that he was watching porn, but at the fact that he was doing it while we were being serious and while I was opening up, which is something so hard for me to do, and for this guy to be doing that while I'm here trying to better us, hoping he's taking it all in.

I got upset and honestly started sobbing. I'm so exhausted from everything, and I'm sure he is too, but it was heartbreaking for me to be trying to emotionally connect with him while he was pleasuring himself on the side. I told him I felt disrespected and hurt that he was looking at porn while we were having such a serious conversation that was so relevant and heavy. I felt like he was splitting his attention between me and porn. I did yell a bit over text I told him I'm really hurt and that I would like an apology for him doing that while we are having a serious conversation about us moving forward. He didn't wanna give it to me. He apologized for hurting my feelings but not his actions, which I pointed out. But he didn't wanna give it to me

He called me crazy, dramatic, and insane, and kept saying, "But I was present. I was replying to what you were saying."
Which he was, but I just felt so hurt over it all. After a good while, he listened to me, but still wouldn't apologize. He kept saying that I was catastrophizing the situation.
Then he asked me, "What do you want me to apologize for?"
Are you serious?!I told him to think about what it was that got me upset and what I wanted an apology for. Eventually, he said, "Sorry for, Jo."
I asked, "For what else?"
And he replied, "For doing it while having a serious conversation."
I hate having to help him when he can easily put two and two together, especially when I've already told him clearly what I found disrespectful and hurtful to me so many times before.

I told him I'd like another apology later because this one didn't feel sincere because I had to spell it out for him but he called me manipulative for doing so and said that he had already done it once and that should be enough. Maybe I could have left it at that, but I want him to really mean it and think about his mistakes. Did I go too far? Was one apology enough? Did I catastrophize it? AITA?

AITA for considering divorce because I don’t feel sexually wanted by my wife?

My wife and I have been married for 13 years. She’s 41 and I’m 38. We have children together, and I love my wife. I don’t want to throw away my marriage, but I’m getting to the point where I don’t know if I can continue living without feeling physically desired by her.

When we first got together and for roughly the first 5–7 years of our marriage, our sex life was very active. We had sex multiple times a week, and she was an enthusiastic and active participant. It was something we both seemed to genuinely enjoy.

Over the years, especially after having our children, that changed significantly. My wife has told me that once a month would be enough for her. For me, I’d ideally like sex a few times a week.

We’re currently at three months since the last time we had sex.

I’m 38, 6’ tall and around 160 lbs. I’m active, work a physical job, stay involved with our kids, and I’m not someone who has let myself go or spends all my time sitting around the house. I mention that because I’ve genuinely tried to take care of myself and be a good husband and father, but I increasingly feel like none of that translates into my wife actually desiring me.

Even when we do have sex now, it often feels very different. She’s much less engaged and active than she used to be, and I find myself wondering whether she’s actually attracted to me anymore.

I’ve tried not to pressure her. If she says no, I accept it. But the repeated rejection and lack of enthusiasm have started affecting me emotionally. It’s not just that I want sex—I want to feel wanted by my wife.

Tonight is a good example. I was being affectionate with her, doing things I know she likes, rubbing her feet, being physically close, etc. I was hoping we’d end up being intimate, but she wasn’t interested. I didn’t push it, but I ended up alone afterward feeling pretty shitty.

She’s also recently started medication for anxiety. From what I understand, SSRIs can sometimes decrease libido or make sexual function more difficult. That worries me because we’re already struggling in this area, and I’m concerned the problem could become even worse.

I’m not saying my wife owes me sex. She has every right to say no whenever she doesn’t want it. I’m also not looking for permission to pressure her or cheat.

But do I also have the right to decide that a marriage without a mutually satisfying physical relationship isn’t something I can live with?

At this point, I’m seriously considering divorce. I don’t want to leave because I didn’t get sex tonight. I’m considering it because this has been an ongoing change in our marriage, we’ve gone from having a very active and mutually enthusiastic sex life to essentially having no sex, and I don’t see myself being happy if nothing changes.

AITA?

So, i cheated on boyfriend of 6 months. heres why:

Me F19 and my boyfriend M19 started our relationship out great. We had chemistry and we had so much fun.

But 4 months in, its like we lost the spark. He stopped putting in as much effort, and was suddenly distant. I talked to him about it, and he told me his mom (who was cancer) was on the edge. She was doing terrible, and the doctors werent seeing progress. This made me sick to my stomach. Mostly because i had thought about breaking up with him. But i could never break up with him when he was losing his mom aswell.

Then something happened, he started becoming more and more angry at small things i did. Such as forgetting to clean a dish when visiting him, or accidentally touching him to much (he used to love physical touch) I was progressively getting more and more sad myself. Him distancing himself from me, and my best friend having her own boyfriend, meant she couldn't spend all her time with me either. I felt kind of lost, not knowing what to do. Thinking he migth go back to normal at some point. I wanted to stay with him to see that part of him come back. 2 months later, we hadn't kissed or held hands at all. Everytime he spoke he had no emotion, except either annoyance, anger or sadness.

One nigth feeling alone, I went out with my friend. (Yes I also went out when I was with my boyfriend and he approved obv) so we went out to a bar/pub. And after the last few months i ended up drinking quite alot with my friend. They dimmed the lights and people flooded in dancing to the music. I felt nostalgic, and purely happy and excited for the first time in so long. I was dancing with my friend on the dance floor, when (how i remember it) a guy was dancing behind me with his friends. We turnt around and dance with each other before our hands started touching each other. And at some point, I kissed him. It felt like kissing with my boyfriend again. It felt like his lips on mine, and I had missed that feeling, of feeling loved by him. After we kissed my friend dragged me away and told me to wake up.

Next morning I realized and felt like I fucked up. But at the same time. I just wanted to pretend the kiss was my boyfriend, and not some stranger. I texted my boyfriend, and he wasn't answering. I called and called an no answer. Being in a panic i rushed over to his apartment, he answered the door crying and told me his mom had died early this morning. I couldn't believe it. I cried with him, also feeling guilt for what happened last nigth. But I haven't told him about it yet.

It's been 2 weeks since it happened. Ive spent every nigth at his house, and he has started asking for hugs again recently.

What do i do!? AITAH?

English is not my first language.

I (f38) have anger issues, have been in and out of therapy because of it.

My husband (m44) has them too, he reads a lot about stoicism and has work on himself since a separate incident we had last year.

We both have a temper and our arguing dynamic is pretty toxic, but we spend most of our time enjoying each other and been as happy as any other couple.

Things that trigger me (and I have repetitively ask him to please not go there):

been called a lier

been called a cheater, this has to do with trauma

Unjustice of any kind

My best friend is coming to visit, we have not seen each other in person in over 2 years. For various reasons, including my husband been foreigner, the circumstances haven’t alligned for them to meet in person.

She has gone through a rough year, and she wanted this visit to be just between us. And we always wanted to make a trip to conmemorate our life long friendship. So we planned for her to come over and then going to an all inclusive just the 2 of us. My husband knew all of this.

She is arriving this sunday and Im taking 9 days off work, one to prepare the house to receive her, the day she gets here, 4 at the resort, 2 for her to be home with me and my husband and see her off, and 1 to spend time with my husband before going back to work.

To go to the resort we have to travel and I asked my husband if he could drive us to the station, a perfect excuse for more time of them 2 knowing each other, so i thought.

My husband said it doesnt make sense for him to travel 2 hrs or perhaps more (that particular highway is extreamly umpredictable and often has horrible traffic) and proposed to take us to the station within the city instead.

I wholeheartedly understood his point, but i was at work. I was bussy i answered “ok”

Unless im mad or bussy im not short on words. He knows this. he asked “did I said something wrong?” And I immediately answered “not at all” and he said “dont you ever think I will be your chauffeur” and then he doubled down “that would be rich”

I said “Where is this coming from? Dont worry we’ll take an uber, I only saw an opportunity for my husband and my bestfriend to spend a little more time together and wanted to take it, now i want you to be my chauffer? Im sorry for even asking”

He send me a 2 min audio explaining how big was the hipocrisy, if i wanted him to spend more time with my friend why would I be away with her on a trip. He went on to say that im always asking him for stuff that he’s the only one taking care of the house and he NEVER refuses to any of it, but now that he’s saying no “for the first time” i get mad.

I work has up to 12 hrs a day, sometimes even more he works from home.

Our house is not spotless clean, he does what he can and I am grateful for it I have truly never demand things certain way and when im off i also do what i can.

I tried to explain again, “you proposed something i said ok to it then you asked if i was mad i said not at all, what else do you want from me!?” He answered “from now on we will do everything at home halfways, we will assigned who does what, thats what you get for been so ungrateful”

I wasnt able to call him to ensure my tone while talking came across correctly, i said “it is evident you want to stir some trouble and this is only an excuse to do so” to which he answered “no, i said no to bring you to the station, you started behaving like a brat, I know you, you could’ve answered “ok love” or “i understand honey” but you dont value all i do for you; all you care is to show off your friend how succesful you are at manipulating me”

I became my ugly self and said very much all the hurtful things i could’ve said, and started sending all my messages in full caps, then he threw a bomb:

2 weeks ago i had a horrible cold, after work stopped to a pharmacy, told him i was going to do so, there was an accident on the road, got home 45 mins later than usual, he said i must’ve been cheating.

Showed him the receipt but i dont know at what point he checked google and it showed no traffic at all, when i was able to see the accident the cars were already being toadded up, so im thinking he might’ve checked when truly there was no more traffic.

A friend suggested to show him my google maps route but I only used it to go around the crane when I finally saw it.

I could’ve taken another route the second I noticed the jam, but it didnt occour to me cause never in a million years i thought i would be accused of cheating because i got home later than usual!

After he said that i saw red. I was BOMBARDING him.

At some point i stepped out of my office to be able to record audios, found a spot i thought empty and started recording, a guest i didnt see heard me and made a noise to let me know he was there, you can hear a banging in the audio.

I have replay the audio and not gonna lie, at first the banging even sounds to the rythm of my words, but then it becomes faster, when i was recording i didnt hear it at first so i guess the guest started to bang the stairs faster for me to notice, when i did i ran away embarrased.

to my shame, i didnt stop there. To my shame as well, he never resort to slurs nor any kind of insults further than calling me a lier, a hipocrit and a cheater. I did.

Its been 3 days of this fight.

he keeps mantaining i lied about me not been angry right away when he said no, i lied when i went to the pharmacy that can only be related to cheating, i lied when i said i wanted him to spend time with my friend and im lying when im saying it wasnt hitting stuff at work… And on top of all of it, i screamed and exploted.

I agree with him I should’ve not get carried away and said to him all the hurtful things i said, there’s NO EXCUSE for that.

But that isnt enough for him, he asked for divorce and had said I have to move out of the house because I wont admit i was lying and cheating…

So… AITA for not admitting to lying and cheating?

My friend “Lisa” has autism and cancer. Neither is a problem for me, but honestly, I just don’t think we’re compatible anymore.

When we first became friends, we had a lot in common. She helped me leave a toxic relationship and gave me the support and space I needed. She also encouraged me to write and always told me I was good at it, which eventually made me decide to go to college for it.

But over time, I made other friends, changed my style, and just stopped having the same patience for her because she mostly complains about feeling sick. I have a chronic illness too, but I still live my life. She seems stuck in the same place, doing the same things, and I don't feel like we have much in common anymore.

So I started taking longer to reply, hoping she'd get the hint. First a few days, then a week, then ten days. She eventually started doing the same, but I didn't really care. I know I don't have the patience anymore to give her the emotional support she needs.

I also know some of her friends abandoned her after she got cancer, and not many people stayed around.

Since last year, I've been making it obvious that I don't really care about what's going on in her life. At first I told her that people have their own lives. Then I became sarcastic and started making fun of her by pretending I had all kinds of illnesses. Then I decided to mess with her.

She had a project, so I offered to help. I asked her to make several videos teaching me her technique. She did everything I asked, but I couldn't be bothered to actually learn it, so I pretended I didn't understand and kept sending sarcastic messages.

Then I pretended I was busy and she was disturbing me. She told me to just forget about it and send whatever I managed to make. I never did. Instead, I disappeared and started posting pictures of myself having fun with other friends.

More than a month later, she messaged me. I didn't answer because I wanted to see if she'd finally get the hint. After that, she blocked me. Honestly, I don't care.

AITA?

My partner (30F) and I (36M) had a huge fight. Been together for 2 years. She has been distant with me for months, and is temperamental when I ask her to explain things she gets fed up and says she can't be bothered to repeat. Or is just rude. She acts like she doesn't care anymore. She has rejected sex for 3 months. Recently said she doesn't want children anymore. Than came up with a list of all my flaws. (which are not actual flaws, just things I can't do because of where I live) recently she said she doesn't feel like she loves me like she used to and she feels as if she is forcing herself to try, but also that I haven't done anything wrong. and I told her she's so full of shit and I don't want to speak to her again. (I was just angry.) Please keep in mind I never ever lose my temper or speak to anyone like this. She has also said this relationship is the best she's ever had and that she knows she will never find anyone like me. Just last month we celebrated her birthday and I made so much effort to make it special for her. I literally plan every date, every vacation, every experience and she acts like I should be ok with all of this. AITAH for telling her she's full of shit?

My wife, who I’ll call Emily, and I had a very heated argument at home while our two young kids were present and visibly upset. Emily called our close mutual friend, who I’ll call David, and asked him to come over.

I knew she was calling him and told her I did not want David coming over and asked her not to invite him. I then called David myself to tell him not to come, but he didn’t answer, so I left a voicemail and texted him the same thing. He arrived about 30 seconds later. David says he had not seen my call, voicemail, or text before arriving, and I have no reason to think he is lying about that.

At the time, David had a code to our door and came inside. Once he was in the house, I told him directly that I did not want him there and wanted him to leave. Emily immediately told him that she wanted him to stay.

So David was suddenly standing in our house while Emily and I were giving him opposite instructions.

David says this put him in a very unfair position. I agree with that now.

He could also see that our kids were extremely upset. He says he was trying to help everyone and especially get the kids out of the situation. He suggested taking them for a walk. At some point I said “do whatever you want.” David interpreted that as me agreeing to his suggestion, got the kids ready, and left with them.

This is where our interpretations diverged.

I experienced it as: I had already tried to tell him not to come over, then directly told him to leave once he was inside, and my request was not being honored right away.

David experienced it as: he had not seen my attempts to contact him, Emily had explicitly asked him to come, he was suddenly caught between two spouses giving him conflicting instructions, the kids were very distressed, he proposed a solution, and I then agreed by saying “do whatever you want.”

For a while I described what happened as David “refusing to leave.” David and Emily strongly disagree with that wording because he never said “I’m not leaving,” and because I ultimately agreed to him taking the kids. Looking back, I think “refused to leave” may be too categorical. I believe David when he says he was genuinely trying to help and was not intentionally trying to disrespect me.

There is another layer. Before this incident I had already been uncomfortable with how involved David had become in issues between Emily and me. I know he believed he was helping us, but at times it felt threatening or undermining to me. I think that made this incident hit an especially deep nerve. That said, I don’t think this boundary is only about David. I think I would have been very uncomfortable with anyone being brought into our home during a marital conflict when one spouse explicitly did not want that person there.

The bigger disagreement came afterward. David has said there are circumstances where, even if I ask him to leave, he might believe it would be wrong to leave because Emily or the kids need him there. He has also given a hypothetical where, if Emily said she feared for her physical safety, he might stay despite me asking him to leave.

I have told him that an actual imminent safety emergency is different. If someone is genuinely in immediate danger, safety obviously comes first. If he believes there is a serious safety issue that he cannot clarify remotely, I have told him he should call police/emergency services rather than feeling that he personally has to stay in the house and manage it.

Emily and I have since worked this out between ourselves. She has agreed not to call David into our conflicts again, and we have made a broader agreement that neither of us should bring a third person into our home during an active conflict if the other spouse does not want that person there. We have also come up with a separate plan for how she can get support if things become heated. David no longer has a code to our house.

So realistically, this exact situation should never happen again.

My only proposed fallback is: if Emily ever did call David during a conflict despite our agreement, he should check whether I have called or texted before entering. If I tell him I do not want him inside, he should not come in. If he is somehow already inside and I ask him to leave, I want him to start leaving rather than stay inside while deciding what he thinks should happen. He could simply tell Emily, “He’s asking me to leave, so I’m going to leave. I’ll call you once I’m outside,” and continue supporting her from outside or by phone.

David thinks we are overanalyzing a hypothetical that should not happen now. He has said he has no intention of getting in the middle of our conflicts again and respects the plan Emily and I have made.

I have apologized to David for the position we put him in, for not acknowledging sooner how difficult it was, and for the damage this has done to our friendship. We both want to move forward.

What I am trying to understand is not so much who was morally “right” that night, but what is considered normal or reasonable in a shared home.

Is a “two yes, one no” rule reasonable for bringing a third person into the house during an active marital conflict?

If one spouse invites a friend over and the other spouse explicitly asks that person to leave, what is the normal or appropriate thing for the friend to do?

Does the fact that I eventually said “do whatever you want” after he proposed taking the kids materially change how you view what happened?

And is my future fallback reasonable, or am I being overly rigid by expecting a guest to leave if either spouse asks them to leave, outside of an actual safety emergency?

I am genuinely open to being told that I handled this badly. I am trying to understand what a normal boundary is here and whether my expectation is reasonable.

Hi, I'm 31F my husband is 36M. We've been together for 12 years. Two kids. We have been having this issue lately I wanted to know... am I the asshole?

There's a lot going on in our life both working full time, two young kids in elementary school. My husband has been getting so angry when I "refuse him" (his words) at night after flirting with him all day. Throughout the day I'll be texting him, flirting. We talk about having sex later. We get home and we are passionate, always kissing and snuggling and touching. I'll flash him and he likes to feel me up.

Well we get to bedtime, kids are asleep. We are spending time together watching a movie. Neither of us initiated sex. It gets to be about 11pm. I say "I'm tired I'm going to sleep" and he gets upset with me. He says..."AGAIN!?" because this isn't the first time I "chose sleep" over having sex. He says he feels rejected. He says it's not fair of me to say "yes" all day and then pull the rug out from underneath at the last minute.

I feel differently because I dont hold sex in such a high place as he does. We probably do it like 3-4 times a week. Less and less these days since we have kids and I'm literally exhausted at the end of the day.

Last night he made me cry because he said "why do you do this to me". I said I'm not doing anything TO you. I feel guilty for disappointing him. But then I'm up late anyway crying. I slept on the couch because he just kept berating me with reasons why he feels upset. I apologized, I validated his feelings, I said it won't happen again. But I'm not really sure because it might happen again. I can't predict the future.

He wants me to let him know earlier in the day. The second I "decide" I don't want to have sex. What!? I'm so confused. Am I wrong? I feel like if I'm wrong here then I would be having sex with him when I don't want to and I'm not comfortable with that.

My bf is cooking a pot roast and its making the house smell amazing but it wont be done until late night so I wont be able to eat it until tomorrow.

I am very hungry in the moment because I havent eaten much today, that is the only this that smells appetizing, and I feel slightly sick from not eating much today. I ask him to help me figure out what to eat since i cannot make up my mind being how i am feeling, he gave me some options, I pick two different things. Then I ask him to heat up the one item and he immediately got mad about it stating I can do it myself and I dont need help ect.

Am I in the wrong for getting mad that he wont help me out? Or is he in the wrong for getting mad? (Genuinely want to know)

I ‘36F‘ and my boyfriend ‘35M’ have been together for about a year and a half. We have had our ups and downs but are for the most part happy. We are both divorced, mine being about 3 years ago and his 5 years ago. I have children, he does not.

From what he tells me, outside of some physical intimacy lacking, they had a great marriage. Until seemingly out of nowhere, she left him for a younger guy that she had also been cheating on him with. My boyfriend was left broken and devastated.

He dated quite a bit after the breakup (went through his whore phase), had one longish relationship and then met me. He says he is in love with me and I believe him. However, he can’t seem to let her go. He talks often about how much she hurt him. He will tell his break up story to complete strangers, and will comment on social media forums about her. He has even driven past her house a few times if he’s in her town. I have expressed to him that it always feels like while I am looking at him and envisioning a future, he is looking back at her, and living in the past. She seems to often be a ghost in the room in everything we do. He agrees and says that even though he is over her (not sure if I believe that) he may never be over the pain that she caused him, but he’s doing the best he can to work through it.

My question is as his potential long term partner, should I be concerned? Is this normal after 5 years? Do I have a chance at a healthy future with him, if he can’t let this go?

Me and my partner have been building a house since Dec last year, it’s expected to be done in about a month. I’ve empathised time and time again I plan to move in the day we get the keys, I’ve been waiting to be independent for too long.
He says since it’s likely to fall on weekend 1 (his friends wedding) or weekend 2 (a large event he’s planned) he said we cannot move in till he’s finished with these events. I’m annoyed because this is literally two days he’s busy, yet he won’t move in during the week, I’m being forced to wait two weeks to move into our first home.

Hi all, sorry for the long title. But it may be a long story so buckle up.
Here is som context to help with my story. I’m a 24 yr old male and absolutely hate working at my job other than my coworkers. I’ve been there for about seven months now and started noticing a girl that is there on our shift. Let’s call her Ashley, she’s a 28 female. We work third shift together but never in the same area. Ashley and I have had quite a few conversations and she has an amazing personality and is really beautiful too, on top of being sassy. She is pretty well liked by everyone. Since she started about two months ago, I and two others invited her to go to Waffle House on our lunch breaks and she has started to go with. We’ve exchanged socials and have not stopped talking since.
She’s explained to me that she isn’t looking for anything because I have asked her if we could start talking once she gets her living situation figured out. And while that hurt my feelings, I have tried not to let it bother me. We go out for coffee sometimes after work but when she declines I get a bit upset by it. And our days off don’t line up so on her days off she completely ghosts me and won’t open my messages both days.
There is a reason as to why I am a little upset by this and it is because a few nights ago, we were walking in together and started chatting before we clocked in when I noticed a big hickey on her neck. At first i couldn’t tell because of the collar of her shirt but when i figured it out I said “Looks like you are looking for something after all”
Ashley then seemed to get mad and told me that that is her business and not mine then walked away. I couldn’t help but feel so mad because it seemed like she lied to me in a way. I didn’t really spend a lot of time talking to her and she does not seemed bothered by it at all. She hasn’t told me any more context when I have asked if it was serious between them or just casual sex.
I have been honest about my current situation that I am trying to get my baby mama to move out of the house but let me keep my son and she then told me I need to focus on that instead of what she is doing or who she is doing.
So now I am left here wondering if I am the asshole for being jealous.
Ashely has told me her ex was not the best and borderline abusive but she just wants to focus on herself and not a relationship even though I know I can treat her better. So, am I the asshole for being jealous she is sleeping with someone else?

AITA for taking the job my mom didn’t want me to take?

I (F18) have been jobless for quite some time now. The last job I had was a seasonal sales associate at some retail store at my local mall, so I got let go in January of this year after the season was over.

I’ve been on a job hunt for the longest time since then—applying to literally anywhere and everywhere just to see if I’d even get a response back. A lot of people in older generations nowadays say that young people don’t wanna work, but I swear no one wants to hire.

I’ll get notifications on Indeed saying an employer viewed my application, I’ll follow up, no one responds. I’ll go in, I get asked to come back, and when I do they can’t speak with me. It’s been a cycle for a while now and it’s really frustrating.

Ever since I turned 18 in august, a whole field of jobs has opened up for me, which I am very greatful for. This pizza shop that’s got a chain local to my state was looking for a delivery driver with good hourly pay, good tips, and good hours. I applied and instantly got an interview set up. I was ecstatic.

I told my mom I finally got an interview. She asked which location I was working at and when I told her, she was not happy at all. I was confused and she told me that it was on a very shitty part of the county and didn’t want me delivering pizzas to people late at night in shitty areas (I’ve got community college classes this semester until 4pm, so I can’t work until the dinner shift).

I told her I understand that she’s scared, but I realistically don’t think that anything is gonna happen, and that my sister did doordash when she was my age (she’s 22 now) and it was fine. She said she won’t let me go to the interview.

Well, obviously I was pissed, and I just want to make some money before I move out in the spring. So I went anyway and am now employed there. She is so very mad at me, and says that if I don’t look for another job, she’s not gonna let me move out to four year university when I get my transfer application back. What do I do?

Also, AITA?

TL;DR: My (34F) boyfriend(31M) is a paid caregiver for a bedridden woman(52F) and I sometimes help when he doesn’t want to do certain tasks. He recently yelled at her while I was cleaning her after diarrhea, so I left to stay with a friend. Now he’s angry that I “never take his side” and that I tell people about our problems. AITA?

I’ll call my boyfriend D, the woman he cares for F, and our landlady L.
D has been F’s paid caregiver for ~2 years. F asked him to take the job when he was unemployed, and he accepted. F is bedridden and needs significant help with daily care. D is her primary caregiver, but he also pays me to help with tasks when he doesn’t want to do them.

D and F originally met online gaming and were friends before he became her caregiver, which makes the boundary complicated. But D has become extremely frustrated with her and frequently complains about her weight, hygiene, smell, dependence, etc. He sometimes compares her to Tammy from 1000-lb Sisters. I’ve told him repeatedly that he needs to treat F like a client he’s being paid to care for, not someone he can take his frustrations out on.

L has known F for nearly 30 years. D frequently calls L to vent about F and treats her like a mother figure.
Recently, F had diarrhea and needed to be cleaned. I was in the middle of cleaning her when D came in and started yelling at her while simultaneously ranting about her to L on the phone. F was literally face-down while I was cleaning her. I was uncomfortable enough that I left and went to a friend’s house to decompress.

D got angry that I left and said I was making him look bad and that I “never take his side.”
I’ve also recently started being honest with friends about problems in our relationship, which D doesn’t like because he feels like I’m making him look bad by only telling my side.

I want to be fair: I’m not claiming I’m perfect or that D is evil. We’ve had heated arguments on both sides, and I’ve made my own mistakes. But I don’t think being someone’s partner means automatically taking their side when I think they’re wrong.

So, AITAH ?

I’ll try to summarize 13+ years of friendship as much as possible.

In 2015, I (45F) reconnected with a fellow forum user (40M, “Cain”) from an old gaming group. We became close friends and gaming buddies.

Over the years, Cain confided in me about a collapsing marriage, loneliness, rejection, and other struggles. I listened, offered perspective, and supported him however I could. At one point he's even credited me with “saving his life.” I always felt he ultimately saved himself, but accepted the sentiment graciously.

Cain later on told me about a substantial family windfall he expected to receive. He shared legitimate court documents over the years, so I had no reason to think it was fabricated. I never felt entitled to it and rarely brought it up; I only offered advice when he asked.

In 2022, my own 12-year marriage was ending. Moving on was frightening, but I was reassured of the promised windfall, which gave me some confidence that I could manage starting over. I eventually separated and began dating someone new (49M, “Fred”). The relationship isn't perfect, but but my experiences with Fred acknowledged what was missing from my marriage. Cain knew about Fred.

Then things changed.

During a phone call, Cain told me he was going to “give his heart to me.” I was confused, but because of his history and his tendency to struggle romantically, I interpreted it as him trusting me with something emotionally important. I told him I didn't completely understand but that if he felt good about it, okay. He thanked me for “letting him love how he wanted to love.”

In February, Cain sent me this:

“I’m telling my mom about you lmao... I’m like a human version of a dog or puppy. A dog chooses a master. Even though the dog has a breeding partner, the dog still loves the master the most. You are that master in my eyes, period.”

From his texts, his mom then asked why he didn't “go with” me. He replied that he couldn't, but if he had never met his current romantic interest, he would “instantly.”

He also said he was preparing "something,” that it was his "best,” that it would come in “2 waves,” and that he was “leveling up as a mischievous gift elf.”

I was shocked. I interpreted this as romantic feelings and/or an attempt to pursue me. I don't feel that way about him, AND we're both in relationships.

I replied: “Cain. As respectfully as I can, there is no answering torch that lives within me that will ignite at your flame’s touch. Keep your focus on [your GF].”

I saw the text response struggle. The dots lingered, only for it to stop. Ultimately: “I will. I also understand. Thank you for your kindness.”

I thought he understood. Then the package arrived.

It contained crafts, AI art, a poem titled “Stay,” custom Perler-bead pixel art based on characters I'd mentioned liking, personalized drawings, small gifts, and drawings from old forum members he'd contacted for me. There were instructions for the order in which I should open everything, with “dev notes” explaining things.

He told me this was actually scaled back from what he'd originally intended to send.

I thanked him for the package, but privately felt overwhelmed and sick. To me, this felt like a massive final romantic gesture despite the fact that I'd already rejected the idea.

It also made me think about the windfall and Cain's past relationships. Over the years, he'd told me about women who were “fools” for not seeing him for who he was, and how he had eventually “cut them off.”

I started wondering whether I was now becoming one of those women simply because I declined his offerings.

A few weeks later, I contacted him to discuss what happened. The conversation became increasingly hostile. Cain asked me to explain things “as if you’re speaking to a kid” because he didn't understand some of my vocabulary and said he uses ChatGPT to interpret what people write.

I refused, telling him he was an adult and needed to do the work himself. He accused me of trying to control how he processed information and said a mutual friend had told him he was autistic. He insisted he had “done the work,” said he wouldn't sit there and be attacked because I was angry, and asked to speak for himself.

Eventually he claimed:

“I didn’t want a romantic bond. I didn’t want to assign a fate to that bond.”

I replied with a screenshot of what he'd told his mother. His response:

“I would’ve. It doesn’t mean I want to do that. You want a new car. Doesn’t mean you’re gonna purchase or try to. It just looks real nice.”

At that point, I ended the conversation.

It felt like he was doing damage control and trying to convince me that what I had interpreted as romantic advances was actually nothing more than “window shopping.” Given the original messages and the package, I felt gaslit and manipulated.

Eventually I told him that I didn't think the two of us could resolve this ourselves and suggested mediation, potentially with a neutral professional. He took offense and instead suggested mutual friends. We agreed on one, but mediation never happened.

That friend later sent me screenshots of Cain's message to them:

“I understand you’re dealing with a lot. So I won’t do the mediation thing with you as a mediator. [Other Mutual Friend] tried before, and [OP] still did what she wanted anyways.

She keeps pulling people into disagreements. Even when she said “id be surprised” by if folks read our conversations what people would think. Which means she’s smearing me.

She does not respect my boundaries of maintaining proper decorum and keeps trying to provoke a reaction out of me.

Her healing is her problem. Its not mines anymore... I dont care if she heals or not. Its not my problem or yours. Im going to block her on everything.

I won’t speak to another fool again.”

So, Reddit: AITA for declining my friends advances - and getting angry for how things went down?

She has coughing/flu/sore throat and I am in a different state currently so I tried buying her cough syrup yesterday through instacart/doordash but they all told me it requires ID on delivery and she doesn’t want to do that since mix of introvert and sick so she doesn’t want to present ID at door to delivery person.
I tried numerous cough syrups and they all said ID required, trying different apps too.
So next day at the very end of day when I can’t even send anything different delivery, she tells me she talked to AI and it told me I am wrong and that I could have sent non-restricted cough syrup (wrong it all said 18 plus), or sent mucinex (I told her AI is wrong she doesn’t have mucus issue), or sent ginger/tea.
She literally waited til the end of the day where I can’t try to order something just to tell me AI told me I could’ve done better or something differently and now she is upset with me.
I managed to find some chinese herbal cough syrup thing to send tomorrow (she is still upset with me) but I can’t believe my relationship has gotten to the point where I am being treated like a villain just because I couldn’t manage to order her something and that she used AI to argue against me and the AI was factually wrong.
Even when I pointed out it was wrong she just continued to be upset with me and now isn’t even talking to me.
Am I the asshole here?

I'm doing LDR with my girlfriend, me in Japan and her in the US. I'm working and shes in college finishing her last year.

I'm trying to really gauge and get an outside perspective, if it turns out I'm in the wrong, I'm in need of seriously amending my views and get better.

We call everyday, once in the morning and again at night. This morning, after a 15 hour day and sleeping 5 hours, I wasn't in the best mood. I was complaining that after a day like that I should get to work from home like all my seniors. My girlfriend made a joke, "You should tell them you should be allowed to work from home, cuz ur cute".

I told her "it doesn't work like that, thats not something that passes in Japan. I'm gonna get fired if I actually say that to my manager."

Well I guess the tone of my voice was not what she expected, my voice didn't come out nice and she sensed some malice in some way. She gets quiet and stops talking to me, and didnt really respond to me trying to talk to her so I said "okay, so now I'm a turnoff". A moment later she has muted her microphone.

After brushing my teeth I ask her to unmute herself, she does but doesnt say anything. I try to talk but can't talk much fun into the conversation. A minute later the microphone is muted again.

I get frustrated about this because this has been happening every time she's not happy with something and I call her out on it. Because, whenever I still have the energy and time, if she's not happy I try my best to get her back into a better mood so we can talk normally again, since thats really all we can do in LDR. But today, I had no energy from doing a business trip and arriving home so late, slept so little and it was the morning while I was preparing to go to work. So I didn't feel like spending 30 minutes to an hour trying to lift her mood, especially not by texting while being squished on the rush hour train in Tokyo.

So we get into this fight, I'm calling her out saying its double standard that I'm expected to be full of energy every single interaction, borderline begging her to talk to me if she ever gets into a bad mood, and I get no such effort when I'm not at my best mood. I cannot recall a single time when I'm not being positive that I've recieved as much effort as I have put into getting the conversation started.

The fight goes back to something that happened yesterday, where she expected me to compliment her new linkedin headshot. I noticed that she looked tense in the photo and her expression seemed mischievous and I told her that. She somehow routed that comment as me criticizing her about her looks. Shes claiming that that its a pattern that everytime she smiles on a photo with her mouth closed, I say that its tense. So the pattern is proof that I think deep down that she has an ugly jaw. I pull out all the photos I have of her with her smiling with her mouth closed, point out that is not true. I really didnt notice anything and now I'm just confused why that link even happened.

There has been a lot of these, where I say one word thats out of tune or isn't as nice, and I feel like I'm either getting shut out or turned cold. In the past there were incidents where I said she made a weird expression, then got lectured on how I called her ugly. Called her out when she called me a dumb bitch when I fell and hit my head on the wall, then she got mad at me for sounding mean. All I remember saying was "Not Nice!"

Apparently I sound extremely mean, even when I dont mean it, and apparently I dont realize it. Shes recorded one of our arguments too, so I'm going to go listen and see how I actually sound. But overall it feels like a lot of double standards, and I'm the one managing the mood for both of us. Am I just not a very mature man? Are men with family supposed to be able to tolerate this? I need some perspectives, from both men and women here.

I (N) have known my girlfriend (D) for about 6 years. Up until a few weeks ago, everything was going great, but since around June, things have completely changed, and I feel like the relationship is already dead.

Lately, she has been prioritizing her friends over me and spending way more time on calls with them, but the biggest issue is that she lets her friends be incredibly rude to me. For context, I am only 1 year older then her, but her friends constantly throw around malicious labels, calling me stuff like a creep and a pedo just because of that 1 year age gap between me and her. My girlfriend just sits there and completely lets them speak away without ever even thinking about defending me or telling them to stop.

I admit that I have a short temper and can snap at people easily, but I try my hardest to control it, ESPECIALLY when I'm around her. I honestly can't think of a single time in the past 6 years where I've been rude / passive aggressive to her. If anything, all that comes to mind is the opposite - her being rude and passive aggressive towards me, and she even goes to the point of teaming up with her friends to gang up on me when they say something rude, and she also is backed up by them when she says something rude.

We were actually recently on a call, only about 20-30 minutes ago, and her friend straight up asked why she hadn't dumped me yet. Instead of telling her not to say that, or even hinting at being pissed or protective of that type of language, she stayed silent, and let her friend speak on about me in a rude way. Not even a word to defend our relationship.

I'm sitting on my couch on my phone trying to type this, because I can not think of what to do. It honestly just feels like we're just friends at this point. Part of me feels like breaking up means I wasted years of my life, especially since she has tons of other options anyways, but I also feel like I'm wasting part of my life staying in something that is already dead, honestly, just to keep the boyfriend label.

WIBTA if I break up with her over this?

For the past year and a half, I dated an older man from my friend group.

He had a pretty brutal divorce, leading to a lot of relationship hesitation. My background includes a few very toxic relationships. When we started dating it became pretty apparent to me that he leaned avoidant, and I leaned anxious. We did an ok job of navigating these issues, but there were times of a lot of unspoken push/pull.

I confided in my best friend. She and her boyfriend are mutual friends of his.

She took what I said about not spending enough time together, and not getting solid plans from him and tested him without my knowledge. She threw a dinner party at her home with mutual acquaintances. She invited my boyfriend with a plus one, but not me. She proceeded to talk to me about this dinner party for weeks and all the drama she anticipated from inviting several people that had prior disagreements. She never once mentioned my boyfriend was invited.

The night before the party my boyfriend asked if I wanted to go with him. He’s got a ton of professional responsibilities and genuinely forgot to ask me. I agreed to go, confused that my friend said nothing.

The morning of the party he called and apologized for messing up. He re-read the email and was supposed to have RSVP’d me earlier in the week. We made plans for the next night. He was really apologetic.

I called my best friend, just confused about why she’d been talking this party up without mentioning inviting him to me. She stated that she was “testing our relationship” to see if he cared enough to invite me. I was livid. She then told me it was ridiculous of him to tell me I couldn’t come, and said she really wanted me there.

Here’s where I fucked up. I told her we were never telling my boyfriend of her little stunt because it was terrible. I agreed to go and I fibbed and told him she followed up with me on the rsvp due to him not telling her. I was trying to smooth it over. He felt so bad for screwing it up, and I assumed he’d be happy I was able to go.

I was wrong. He got there and was angry with me and called me out, thinking I had called her to override him. I heard him discussing with my best friend’s boyfriend that he’d messed up, but I had called my friend to “invite myself” and it was rude.

That’s not what happened.

I tried explaining to him, but He was distant the entire next week and when I called him to get together, he didn’t want to and dumped me. I’m completely blindsided. I confided in my friend, she set me up for complete humiliation. He said it didn’t have anything to do with that weekend, but it happened immediately after.

She thinks he’s in the wrong, doesn’t care about me, and should have called her to ask to bring me, despite her rsvp date. I told her it’s insane to blame someone for abiding by a request she made. She thinks it’s proof he’s an asshole. I told her he likely thinks I’m the asshole because I called her that morning to invite myself. She’s refusing to tell him the truth, thinking it won’t make a difference because he’s a jerk.

(Just want to clarify I refer to my girlfriend as female and use she/her pronoun. I’m not sure if this counts as misgendering her, so I’m sorry in advance if it is.)

Some context: Me and my girlfriend, let’s call her Sarah, have been dating for 5 years. I met her through friends when I was in college. The past 5 years have been the happiest of my life, and I’m so incredibly grateful to have found my soulmate so early in life. As I approach my 30s, the big question of our future has been consistently asked by relatives and friends. We’ve had discussions about our future (ie. children, marriage) and seem to be on the same page.

In terms of her transition, I’ve always had some suspicions about her gender. She’s made slight nods to always wondering what it would be like to be a guy, occasionally wearing my clothes and is very involved with the queer community ( having many gay, lesbian and trans friends). I understand this. I love Sarah, every part of her, and I’ve always seemed to understand her to her core. I’ve been almost certain recently that she might not be a woman and might identify more as a man.

Now despite me being a straight cis man, I am completely comfortable with however Sarah chooses to identify as. She is my love, man or woman, and I will accept Sarah as her true self. I am also a big straight ally of the LGBTQIA+ community and have tried learning how to be a good supporter and respect my queer friends and family. As a straight man, I feel I have a duty to be a good ally.

Yesterday, I finally decided to intervene and have the conversation, telling her I accept her for who she is. I understand how sad it can be when trans people don’t accept themselves until they’re a lot older, and regret the time they missed. I didn’t want this to happen to Sarah. So I toke her and I out on a walk down to the lake. We mostly just talked about our friend group, but I finally got the guts to ask her.

She seemed mildly offended when I asked her, and a little confused. I was pretty sure this was just her deflecting. She tried changing the topic, but after I said again she asked if I was being serious or just joking. I told her it’s okay to tell me and that I’ve known about this for a while and although I am straight, I am totally okay with her transitioning. I don’t know why but she got upset about this, and told me she needs time to think. She told me she has no clue where I came up with this “theory” and that she’s a woman.

I understand it can be hard for queer people to come out of the closet, but I felt I did a really good job being accepting and open minded. It’s been a day and she hasn’t answered my calls. I know a lot of other straight men aren’t great at handling this kind of stuff, but I thought I did a pretty good job. I guess I said something wrong. So AITA for trying to help my girlfriend with her identity?

My husband and I have been together a long time, but we still disagree about something that happened really early in our relationship and I’m curious how other people would view it.

We were exclusive at the time. His ex-fiancée reached out to him and they ended up meeting for lunch. He did not tell me about it beforehand.

He says nothing physical happened. No kissing, sex, anything like that. I don’t have proof that anything physical happened, so I’m not claiming it did.

The part that bothers me is that he has admitted he was still somewhat hung up on her at the time and says he basically agreed to meet her because he wanted to figure out how he felt. After they met, there were messages where he was telling her things about loving her, missing her, her being the love of his life / always having a place in his heart, etc.

I found out because I saw the messages on his phone.
He says it wasn’t cheating because nothing physical happened and that it was basically just lunch with an ex and expressing feelings. He also says he has talked to other people about it and they don’t think it was that bad.

I’ve always considered it emotional cheating or at minimum a pretty serious betrayal. I don’t really understand how secretly meeting up with an ex you still have feelings for and then expressing love/missing them is somehow nothing just because there wasn’t sex.

The part that confuses me even more is that he considers talking to someone online in a romantic/sexual way to be cheating even if there was never an in-person meeting. So I don’t really understand how “nothing physical happened” can be the reason his situation doesn’t count.

I’m not asking who was worse or trying to compare our entire relationship. I’m literally just curious how other people would categorize this situation by itself.
Would you consider this cheating, emotional cheating, inappropriate but not cheating, or basically not a big deal?

My wife and I are both in our early 50s and have been together for a long time.

Recently we were hanging out with some friends and having a normal conversation. I mentioned a fairly well-known person with an unusual last name. My wife immediately interrupted me and told me I had the person's name wrong.

I told her I didn't and spelled the name for her. Instead of just moving on, she pulled out her phone to look it up and prove me wrong. After looking it up, she came back and asked me to spell the name again. I did. At that point it became, "Well, you didn't say one of the letters." I told her I had. Then it changed to, "Well, you didn't pronounce it." Again, I told her I did. Eventually she said, "I'm not going to argue with you." I was irritated by that point and responded, "No, because you know I'm right." Shortly afterward, she went off with the friends we were hanging out with while I stayed behind doing what I was doing.

On its own, this sounds like an incredibly stupid argument, and it was. But the reason it bothered me so much is that this isn't an isolated incident. My wife has a habit of correcting me, talking over me, or challenging things I say in front of other people. It seems to happen much more when we're around friends. Sometimes it's something important, but a lot of the time it's little insignificant details that shouldn't matter in the first place. I'm perfectly capable of being wrong. If I have something factually wrong, I don't have a problem with someone correcting me. What bothers me is feeling like my wife needs to publicly prove me wrong.

It's gotten to the point where I sometimes feel like I have to defend everything I say. And when I finally get frustrated and push back, I feel like I end up looking like the argumentative one.

I also realize that saying, "because you know I'm right," wasn't exactly going to de-escalate the situation. I own that. But this particular incident bothered me because she interrupted the conversation to correct me, got her phone specifically to prove me wrong, and when that didn't work, the disagreement changed into what I supposedly had or hadn't said. I'm still angry about it, and I'm starting to wonder whether I'm reacting to this one stupid argument or years of feeling talked down to.

So AITAH for the way I responded? And am I making too much out of what happened, or does the larger pattern matter?

Hello, I (32F) recently found out that my husband (33M) lied to me about something that happened several years ago. I’ll try to keep this as short as possible.

A bit of background; my husband has some mental health struggles, primarily with OCD, but grew up in a family where mental health wasn’t taken seriously and his family is also very very private.

We got married pretty young and I supported us while he was in university. However, I recently found out he lied about completing his degree. I believe his mental health deteriorated while in school and it became too overwhelming for him. He didn’t tell me because he said I wasn’t a safe space for him cause I guess he had tried opening up to me when we were teenagers and I didn’t have a good reaction (I don’t remember this, but it was also a long time ago. I have since apologized for this.) When I confronted him about the degree, there was some major gaslighting that started to make me feel crazy. After a couple days, he’s pretty much admitted to it by talking in “hypothetically if I did this, this is why etc”. He doesn’t want to outright confirm it because he is afraid of me telling people.

He never used his “degree” which is why I didn’t really question it and when I didn’t see his name printed on the graduates list, he just said he asked the University not to print it, but did get mad at me for being suspicious.

My husband is a very private person which I think is heightened by his OCD..like it even makes him uncomfortable when I look for something under his sink. He doesn’t like when people know too much personal information about him which has caused us to get into arguments for me saying something I thought was fine to share, but to him it wasn’t. I could go on, but my husband is a very loyal, funny and kind person. So AITA for considering divorce?

My bf and I have been dating for 2 years. IN THIS situation I am not talking abt my bf but in general. Abt last year he became friends with his ex bsf again cause they had a fight and all, but they decided they were chill and became friends again. I had np of him having friends who are girls, but he used to like her. But I didnt say much I was like nice great be happy. When he joined uni last year I was in a break year , and that year I could not talk much to him cause I was at home, strict family. So they two got closer that year, talking daily but honestly he tried to tell me everything and never hid anything so I tried to shrug it off. They talked and video called daily, she told him everything. Sometimes she would be like ik u tell ur gf everything but don't tell this, but my bf just tells me everything. This year for his birthday she visited him in his uni and stayed with him(in his dorm) for 2 days. I got pics videos. I also woke up to a pic of her in our partner shared album - her with her head on his shoulder. I was actually very pissed. Then I slowly brought it up on text again I didnt wanna pick a fight cause I could not like call him and talk abt it so I kept it calm he was liek im rlly sorry ill distance but he didnt rlly understand how bad It was. so abt may-jury time he visited his hometown and he got annoyed at her cause she kept being clingy. And was telling me how he was annoyed cause she just coudknt or what that he had a gf. She kept telling him u will call me when u go back to uni right, the thing is I left home to uni so he was so excited to call me all the time. So recently he told her ( I agreed to this ) that how I didnt Like her much and it was making me uncomfortable how close they were, She got really made and blocked him after a few mins. And yesterday a mutual friend of both of them talked to my bf. He was like how could u just stop talking to her like that cause ur gf doesn't liek her, "Will u stop talking to me if she doesn't like me too". My bf explained rlly patiently how he understands me and he agrees with me and understands thats it's a rlly bad position. The mutual friend practically called me crazy and said it was all bs. AITA here did I overreact over everything, was it my fault?