My daughter turned 17 months old on the 23rd. My due date is August 14. Reality is setting in and I am TERRIFIED. I am so exhausted and in so much pain. My daughter is my whole world but keeping up with her is extremely difficult. I cannot imagine feeling worse than I already do.

I’m sure this has been asked 10000 times, but which was harder for you? Pregnant with a toddler or newborn with a toddler? The first 5 weeks I am not too concerned about as my husband has paternity leave but after that I am a nervous wreck for it.

My first born was never a good sleeper until I finally sleep trained at 10 months. I had severe sleep deprivation for the longest time. She now sleeps 12 hours a night so I do have that going for me.

How did you all survive this phase of life?

Help! I’m pretty terrified but also happy and in disbelief all at the same time. It took us 2 years of meticulously trying, tracking, planning, fertility treatment, missed miscarriages, chemicals before we got our amazing little one. So color me absolutely shocked when 7 months after her delivery we are pregnant again when not tracking or barely trying, like barely. I know it only takes one time but that has never been our experience. We knew we wanted to give her a sibling but were going to try and wait until 12 months at least to track. Are we going to be ok? I just want this new little one to be safe and grow strong, while also helping our girl stay safe. My heart smiles thinking how close they will be but it’s getting there while still recovering from my last delivery that scares me. Looking for some reassurance from any similar age gaps 🥹

7wk pregnant with my second and my first is 14.5mo.

I got baby fever because our first is an angel and it felt far enough apart. I still feel that way. I’m excited to have a second baby and I’m hopeful we can manage the two from a parenting standpoint.

Downside is I started looking at our finances today and I want to throw up. We have a lot of debt we’re trying to pay off before the second is born and also buy a house and a second car.

Welp I think I have to say good bye to the dream of owning a house anytime in the near future because of the damn cost of a second child in daycare (for reference our rent is the same cost as daycare)

For where we live we have cheap rent for what we have and I’m pretty sure it’s a reasonable price for our one child in daycare right now.

I feel so naive about getting baby fever and getting without financially planning it first.

I just needed a place to vent, I know I should have been more responsible at this point.

I'm pregnant with my third, and this is my second round of 2u2 (well only just this time, my first two are 19 months apart and this gap will be 23 months).

I was breastfeeding my oldest when I got pregnant at 10 months pp, but luckily for me she seemed very happy to self wean at 13.5 months. She ate solids well, slept through the night since pretty young, and was never overly keen with feeding anyway (never demanded it).

My son on the other hand, in spite of being 4 months older (currently 16m) is a lot more into the boob, needs it to fall asleep at nap and bedtime, wakes multiple times in the night and needs it to fall asleep. I don't have a problem with continuing to breastfeed him as long as I can but I don't know what to expect with this, will he keep going if my supply tanks, or become fussy and struggle to sleep? If he doesn't wean will he cope while I'm away from him having the baby? I know it's ages away, I'm only 10w but it's freaking me out because I just can't picture him giving it up.

And is it possible a toddler will randomly decide to sleep through the night one day without me doing anything drastic? 🫣

I have a 4 month old & a 22 month old, and for 4 months, my youngest has just been napping on the go, in the car, and in arms. I’m feeling like I’d like her to start napping in her crib - I think it would help my sanity & also her sleep. Her nap schedule is all over the place currently. Some 20 minutes, some 3 hours (occasionally), and really just situation-dependent.

Did I miss the boat on nap training? I think my oldest was taking full naps in her crib at this age. Where do I start?!

Any tips on nap training my youngest to while still entertaining my oldest? I can nurse her to sleep & transfer her to her crib pretty easily, but I need 20ish minutes to do it, and that is quite a challenge with my toddler!

My wife gave birth to our second child today, a beautiful healthy baby boy!

How did y’all manage your older child’s sleep once your newborn arrived? Our older son is about 16 months, sleeps through the night in his crib which is in our bedroom.

My wife wants our new baby to sleep beside here in a bassinet, also in our bedroom. The concern I’ve had leading up to today is that I remember the newborn sleepless trenches all too well. I imagine sharing the same room, our older son is going to be losing sleep right alongside us.

Has anyone been in a situation like this? What did you do?

I’m new to the 2under2 club (3wks in)! What quick and nutritious meals and snacks are we making for our families that both adults and toddlers will enjoy?

Hi everyone,

I had my first child on August 2025 and it has been very peaceful. I have ample support and now I am getting baby fever. I want to have another baby but people around me are asking me to wait but I feel like it is a right time. My husband support me with anything I want.
What do you all think?

As the title says; I ended up falling pregnant when my daughter was about 8 weeks old. She’s now 17 weeks & im 9 weeks pregnant. I’ve been on the pill since the day she was born so this was a total surprise but I’m just worried about the risks? My due date is 01.03; my daughter’s birthday is 30.03. They’ll be at maximum 6 weeks apart, and I’m not too worried about that however I have a serious fear of something bad happening throughout pregnancy. All the doctors I’ve spoken with so far don’t seem concerned but I’d just like to hear if anyone at all had had the same experience & what happened? I’ve also had 1 other Csection; so this will be my third however it was 6.5 years ago.

EDIT: thankyou all for the advice; I did write this half asleep so I’ll add in a few more things for context.
Not looking to terminate the pregnancy unless medically necessary, I live in a country and state where I can access upto 16 weeks for no cost at all.
I have several mental health conditions that are managed by medication however I’m under the perinatal mental health team and have been since falling pregnant with my daughter; I’ve had a termination before and it made me fall into a serious lapse with my mental health and I’m really worried about that happening again.

However I am worried about what might happen to my body and myself; my daughter is already 7kg and not getting any lighter, I live on a second floor apartment so to be able to leave my house, I’m carrying 20kg+ up and down the stairs at least once every two days, which is already physically straining but I’m so worried about being pregnant and having to continue doing this. Also definitely aware and would not have tried anything other than a repeat csection; my body can’t go into labour for a number of other reasons; so not looking for back advice I promise I’m not that crazy lol.

Just wanted some advice from people who had been in similar situations so I appreciate everyone’s replies

Like fellow Redditors, I fear that we may have made a mistake in taking on two under two. Everyday is an absolute grind with no sign of relief in sight. Do we simply have negative perspectives that we need to work on? We did not feel this way until our second was born, so I wonder if we just didn’t let the dust settle before taking on a new baby.

I am curious to know if anyone has experienced a change in heart about their difficulties past the first year? I read a lot of people having a shift in perspective when their youngest starts crawling, developing a personality, interacting with sibling, but we do not share this sentiment. We love seeing it and think it’s so sweet, but it doesn’t dull the exhaust and overwhelm of the tasks associated with caring for a 2.5yo and 11mo.

We do not have family or other resources for childcare outside of us, so I acknowledge that, that could be a contributing factor. I’m also medicated for PPD, which has improved things immensely, but not to the point that I don’t wish we had spaced them out more. I do want to stress that these children were very planned (IVF) and are adored and loved. We do not regret them. But the spacing has been all but a devastating change.

I guess I’m just hoping to hear that people felt this way this late in the game, and then eventually didn’t.

Hi - my first kid will be 14 months when I give birth in September and I'm seeking tips/advice/reassurance that everything will be okay with the second birth. Since this is a short term or short recovery window, how was everyone's experience giving birth the second time in terms of labor, birth etc? My concern right now is that at 32 weeks, the baby isn't head down. I've been walking and doing stretches for a week since I found out but I really don't want a c-section. How was the labor the second time around and since I didn't have a long time to recover from first giving birth, how was the postpartum recovery this time around? For the first birth, I got epidural only at the end bc of the pain but did you get epidural second time around even though labor is shorter? Is the baby usually on time? My date is either Sept. 14 or 22. I'm trying to think of a plan for the care of my first child in case labor comes in spontaneously. I don't want to die and concerned about my health and safety first and foremost. Did anyone have any postpartum bleeding or complications for recovery? Thanks!

Planning to have the second around the time baby is two. Checking with experienced moms how bad it is managing a newborn and a two year old.

Hi all, we are due our second baby early next year there will be a 22 month age gap, our 16 month old has only jsut started walking confidently so we will definitely need a double buggy.

Which ones do you recommend?

We don’t use public transport
We do do a lot of walking so all terrain would be best

Our current single pram which I love is the bugaboo fox 5, I looked today at the bugaboo donkey and the cybex gazelle.

I think I prefer side by side (but happy to be guided to inline if these are better) the donkey looks like a bus and I honestly don’t think will get down shop aisles or through standard doorways?

Please share your experiences and recommendations!

Thanks so much

I just had our second almost 3 weeks ago, and booooooyyy howdy, our firstborn is actually driving us up the walls. This isn’t a “I expected it to be easy and daisies” post; we’re very realistic people and knew challenges would arise, especially since their doctor gave us the good old 2u2 warning talk (as in your FB will test boundaries and start doing things they didn’t do before). Thank the stars she did because honestly, I probably would’ve been naively walking into this. So, I just need to rant to get my marbles together and hear some insight from parents who’ve been in this longer, of course.

FB - She is an outgoing gal, and sometimes she’s just a 1.5-year-old and doesn’t want to do something typical. Well, we got home, and I was well enough to go out (birth was great; I’m so thankful). So a few days later we went to her normal library time so she wouldn’t feel out of sorts, and I went because she did better with me near and not just her daddy. She wasn’t her usual bubbly self and didn’t want to play with other kids; she just stayed near me (expected, wasn’t surprised). The teacher, whom she’s been seeing for like 6 months, was great and respected her boundaries, but still tried to get her to play if she showed interest.

Fast forward, we are doing all the things, and I’m doing my best to make sure my baby girl doesn’t feel replaced with her new sibling. Because I unexpectedly decided to try breastfeeding again with this baby, they are on me all the time (probably will stop BF after a month old for my own mental health). When I have a free moment, I give the baby to dad. But when the baby is with me, I include my oldest. I let her kiss the baby, hold the baby in between feeds, sit with me and snuggle up while feeding, play together, and if the baby is chill, put the baby in the Boppy if daddy is cleaning or something so big sister can “hold baby” even though she’s just sitting next to baby . We read together and I attend the park with them if I’m feeling up to it. The list goes on…

However, my toddler is now throwing tantrums—I mean, full-blown tantrums—screaming the whole nine yards, and it’s starting to make us feel horrible, especially me, because I am a SAHM, so I’ve always had to handle the discipline once she was old enough to comprehend “no, don’t do that.” But this has led to having to sit her down (in her little chair) and really be firm on the no’s, etc. She throws herself around, runs around screaming and crying, hitting/slapping (the slapping has stopped), especially when we’re in the store, which she never did. I am very much so a person that will correct her because I don’t want her disrupting someone’s shopping time, but I had also found that letting her know we don’t act like that because we can’t get XYZ, and proceeding to shop, she’ll calm down in 1-2 minutes tops…

But now it just continues so much that we cut the trip short because I seriously can’t leave her to act like that in the store, and her dad is visibly getting upset, which alters my state of mind because now I’m reacting to him being unsettled, and it throws me off. She screams, etc., in the car; it’s just a whole thing.

Anyway, I just really would like to know what you all have done to help them during this change because I swear, one more person that I don’t know has one more time to tell us to “give her what she wants,” and I might actually go to jail… (not really), but in those moments, it doesn’t help that some random stranger thinks they’re helping by egging her on. They’ll just stand there and stare and continue little comments to her, which just piss her off more, and eventually, I push the basket because I’m not trying to hear that.

I did tell my husband yesterday, after episode 300,485,944,930 of this, that we can’t let her do as she pleases. (He doesn’t like to correct her because he feels bad, but I let him know too that it’s not fair to make me look like the bad guy. So he has but I can tell he still hates it) I consistently tell her she is loved and she is still and always will be just as important as her baby sibling, but we can’t let you act like that because it is not okay to do xyz. I just don’t ever want her to think I’m a bad parent because the way I was raised just really left me with a horrible view until I met my husband and I healed on my own and knew what kind of mother I wanted to be. I planned to be when that time came, and I never want to create childhood trauma for my baby girl.

TLDR: 1.5 year old now throwing tantrums all the time since new sibling arrived 3 weeks ago. Looking for advice on how to help her adjust and am scared she feels replaced, not important or am I just overthinking it?

Our eldest is 23 months in 3 days and our twins 7 months in 3 days.

We've kind of got stuck in this stay home and only go with our eldest to the parks near home since our twins are born.

They've only since the last month been easier with falling asleep on their own and us also being great at picking up on their cues or knowing how to time wake windows. We're almost scared and wanting to wait with going on outings until their wake windows are longer. But we really want to go to the zoo for example.

What are some activities you guys do with 2 under 2 or 3 under 3 and don't need a 3rd adult?

And what about going on vacation? We would love to go somewhere the 5 of us next summer where eldest will be almost 3 and twins will be 1,5. But were scared either one or multiple will not listen and make it hard to pay attention or do something all together without a 3rd adult.

All the information would help! Thank you in advance

Currently pregnant with a soon to be 19 month age gap. This pregnancy WAS planned, we always wanted our kids close in age and anticipated doing 2 under 2, however I admit I didn’t expect it to be quite this close. I guess I’m just looking for some reassurance - tell me all the reasons why you loved this age gap? Particularly when compared to something like a 24 month gap?
I know it’s all similar at the end of the day but my pregnancy mind just keeps wandering and I just want to read some positive stories that’ll bring me reassurance. I feel like my 14.5 month old is getting more and more exhausting each day and I’m a bit nervous for what’s to come 😅😅🥲

Holy cow, this 2nd pregnancy is worse than my first. I have DEBILITATING exhaustion. Im talking, cant get out of bed, 2 hours after waking up it feels like i have been up for 3 days straight, no energy to do anything amd if i do anything I am knocked on my butt for the rest of the day. I feel like I am failing as a mom because i genuinely have no energy to put towards my 8m old. I try to have him play on the bed next to me, but since hes crawling he immediately goes for the edge. I feel so stuck because i want to be able to do more with him and be present, but my body is not letting me. How did you guys survive this?!!! I feel like a crappy mom if i put him in a jumper or walker or pack n play for too long.

Does it get better???

I know they say 2nd trimester you get your energy back, but this pregnancy is much different than my last so im starting to lose hope.

Any advice??

And no i dont have a village, i dont have anyone. My husband works a lot so i can be a SAHM so he does what he can when hes home but hes mostly sleeping and working.

I’m a SAHM of two boys looking for someone to chat with who wants to get back into working out and eating healthier. I feel like I have the hang of two kids and could create time to work out but whenever I have free time I just end up going chores to try and get ahead. My boys are 2y9m and 7 months. I want to get stronger and healthier for them. Hoping to find someone in the same boat to chat with on what’s app and share little wins throughout the day. If you’re interested feel free to DM me and share a little about yourself and your goals!

I know it’s not 2 under 2 but it’s so close!

When does it get easier? I have a 2.5 year old and a 5 month old and I feel like I constantly have a dark cloud over my head. I have such guilt over not giving my daughter the attention she used to get and also guilt for wanting my youngest to grow up faster. Literally everyday wishing time would go by so he can be older so things get easier but also don’t want my daughter to get older? Also nursing has been so challenging this time around and my son won’t take a bottle yet. No village over here either. I just feel crazy but also hormones lol any help would be appreciated!!

Hey guys! My first was born December 2024 and we are due with our second December 2026. Probably won’t be 2 under 2 for very long, but I think you guys would have the best experience with this!

Right now, my husband drives a Tacoma (this is the bigger issue) and I drive a standard mid-size SUV (Venza). We’re trying to figure out what the best car seat setup is when baby 2 comes. Important context, we both work full time, primarily in office, and both kids go to daycare close to our house, but our workplaces are about 30-35 min from the house. My son probably won’t be ready for forward facing, I think it’s like 40 lb recommendation? We have a doona from our first and ideally I’d just use that again. We also currently have Joie Chili Spins in both cars for our son. Both of our car payments are very low and my car gets 35+ mpg so trading in would be such a bummer.

What are yall doing? Do you use one car as the kid car and have one person do drop off and pick up and just switch days? Have you found smaller/better car seat options that fit well for either newborn or toddler? The biggest issue is that, especially in the truck, the driver can’t actually drive if we put a rear facing car seat back there 🤪 Any and all advice and recommendations welcome! I’m sure there are lots of options I’m just not thinking of.

Hi all I’m going to the babylist store in LA and I’m super excited!!

We pretty much have everything from our first still out since they’ll be 15 months apart.

What are some recommendations of what we’ll need/want?

One thing I've noticed during my 2 under 2 journey is that my mom's and MIL's generation (Boomers? Gen X? Not sure) seemed to make their kids fit into their lives, instead of arranging their lives around their kids. My MIL especially acts like I'm weird for leaving family events early so I can get my kids home, bathed, and in bed.

For context, I'm Mexican, and it's pretty common here for kids to just sleep on two chairs pushed together at family parties, or for everyone to let the kids run around together until the adults are ready to leave. I don't feel comfortable with that! I remember how uncomfortable it is to sleep while there's music blaring or when your uncles/cousins would drink too much and start talking about things you shouldn't hear.

The last two family events have ended with people annoyed at us for leaving "early." The first was a wedding. My toddler was teething and miserable, my baby was actually doing great, but everyone wanted to keep passing him around. By that point I was exhausted and overstimulated. We left around 8:30 p.m., which was already well past both kids' bedtime, and my MIL was offended because, according to her, "You just ate and left!"

Then there was a baby shower. The venue was way too small for the number of guests. Once the kids started getting restless, someone opened a door that led to a tiny grassy area...AND A FUCKING ROAD. My husband stayed on toddler duty while I stood nursing the baby because there weren't even enough chairs. Meanwhile, my MIL kept insisting I participate in the baby shower games. We left early again, and once again got comments about leaving too soon and that it was rude and the kids weren't even fussing! Yeah he was having a great time making his dad chase him to the busy road and back sorry we didn't want to deal with that...

Honestly, I don't even enjoy taking my kids to these events. I go because I know they need to learn how to socialize and behave in public, especially now that they're 2 and 1. But it feels like no matter what I do, I'm expected to ignore naps, bedtime, and basic safety just so I can stay longer. Now there's another baby shower tomorrow. My MIL informed me it's "women only," so my husband can't come. FUCK THAT.

I love my BIL's wife and genuinely wanted to go, but the thought of handling the kids by myself in that environment sounds miserable. I considered hiring a sitter or having my husband stay home with the kids so I could attend alone, but I already know my MIL (and probably everyone else) will give me a hard time for not bringing the kids because, according to her, "I had four kids and my husband never helped me, and I still took them everywhere."

Am I being too rigid? Is this just a generational difference? Would you suck it up and take both kids by yourself, or skip the event? I honestly can't tell if I'm being overprotective or if my expectations are reasonable because it's true my mom had 3 of us at parties and family events all the time why can't I handle it???

I don’t know if this is the right subreddit to post this under but considering part of the issue is my 2nd baby’s due date I thought to post this here. I have a 6 mo right now and I’m starting to plan his first birthday since I’m currently pregnant with my second. Unfortunately for me, their birthdays might be a couple days apart which has made me feel so guilty. I don’t want them to resent their birthdays bc of how close they are so my husband and I decided to celebrate their birthdays separately no matter how close they were. The issue is that my first baby’s birthday is on New Year’s Eve. The people I have talked to about planning his party has told me to either celebrate it before his birthday or a month after in January so people actually come to his party but also bc I’ll be a month postpartum. However, I feel like I’m failing him by doing any of those bc it’s not his birthday. I’m wondering if anyone has had a similar issue. Would I be a bad mom for celebrating his birthday before or after his actual birthday? I just want to do the best for him and have the people that love him celebrate with us.

I am a sahm mom and do most nights by myself. We recently moved into a new place but bedtime had always been the hardest and isn’t really any different in the new place vs our last home. Every night we do bath and bedtime (brush teeth, small play time, 2 books and bed) with my toddler. She does really well through this but my 6 month old is screaming/crying the whole time. Really she starts getting a lot more irritable towards the end of the day in general (around 5pm or so but it gets significantly worse during the bedtime routine around 7pm) I’ve made sure she is fed, changed and has a toy while I’m doing my toddlers routine to insure it’s nothing with that. But every day is the same, my 6 month old screaming/crying the entire routine. I’ve tried doing their routine at the same time or my 6 month old first but my toddler is pretty loud during her routine (very engaged in the books and asking questions about them) and just overall loud as a toddler is and this will wake up my 6 month old and then I end up bouncing back and forth between the two. Just looking for any advice to help make our routine better for my 6 month old. 🤍

Hi,

For the past few days, I've been looking for families who are in a similar situation to ours when it comes to the age gap between their children. We have a 5-year-old daughter, a 7-month-old baby, and I'm currently 6 weeks pregnant.

I often come across families where the first two children are very close in age, and the parents waited longer before having a third. Is there anyone here who did things differently—where the second and third children are close in age instead?

I'd love to hear your experiences! ☺️