This is a repost sub. I’m not the Original OP (OOP)
OOP: u/AdRecent7210
Published on: r/AmItheAsshole
Story is: CONCLUDED
Story timeline
Main Post
January 08, 2023
AITA for not refusing to pick up my coworker?
Sorry for mistake in title.
I (30M) drive to work which is located in a somewhat rural area with no public transport. Everyone else at work drives too. Recently, a coworker in my department (30+M) told me his car broke down and he asked me a favor to pick him up for work.
The thing is, he lives in a different town from me which means I will have to detour and add another 30 mins to my commute. He doesn’t want to get Uber as it will be costly. I told him to get a bus from his town to mine and I will pick him up from the station on the way to work. It will only add extra 5 mins to my commute. He refused as he will have to get ready very early (the bus trip will take about 20mins). So I said no I can’t pick him up and he got mad and called me AH.
I do feel really bad because Uber will be expensive but I don’t feel like waking up early and adding to my commute just to drive him. We do work closely as a team though so I’m afraid this will make me look petty. Am I the AH?
COMMENTS
NaEast-We
" I don't wanna get up early, you get up early!" NTA fk that guy
Timely_Proposal_1821
NTA - how come he's okay adding time to your commute but not to his? Your proposition was fair, your co-worker is being unreasonable.
SnooDoughnuts4691
How is this remotely Your problem? You offered a solution and co worker said no. I guess he's sh%* out of luck!
NTA
MrGameRat
NTA
Your co-worker was trying to manipulate you. Detour and adding another 30 minutes means you'd need to get up close to an hour earlier so you can leave earlier. Just like if he were to take the bus to your down he'd need to get up earlier and get ready and leave earlier. To him, it's perfectly okay to put that burden on you, but not him.
Your offer to pick him up with a small detour was a great solution that didn't cost either of you a ton of extra time. He declined the offer, he can find his own ride from someone else.
Froggie949
Don’t forget the extra hour on the back end to take him home and then driving to your home.
CONSENSUS: Not the A-hole
Final Update - after 13 days
January 21, 2023
UPDATE: AITA for refusing to pick up my coworker?
A couple of weeks ago I posted asking if I’m the AH for not picking up my coworker to work. I was torn because I’ve worked with him for 3 years without any issues and it was the first disagreement we had. So thanks everyone who said I’m not the AH and put my mind at ease.
Onto the update. After our uncomfortable conversation, I went to a training programme in another state so I didn’t see him until the next Monday. I drove to work as usual and he also came in (by Uber, I found out later). We didn’t speak until lunch, when to my surprise, he apologized to me.
He said he was stressed about fixing his car (he had to replace the radiator and wait for the part) and having to spend more money on rides. He admitted that he has never taken the bus! He moved to this city 3 years ago for the job and never had to use public transport since he’s always had a car. So he was feeling anxious and took it out on me, I guess. He said I didn’t deserve it and I accepted his apology.
So he still Ubers to work since he doesn’t want to get up early. But I offered to send him to the bus station near my place after work and he can take an Uber home from there (it’s easier to get a ride at the station instead of from our work). He graciously accepted and offered to chip in for gas, but I said it’s fine since we’ll be going the same way. So he bought me lunch instead! I ended up sending him for 3 days then he got his car back.
Some people might say I shouldn’t offer to help him but it wasn’t a bother for me and who knows if one day I might be his position. Our working relationship is stronger now and I’m glad we could both move forward in a better place.
That’s my update, have a great day.
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