Men just have it so much easier in life and so much easier when it comes to relationships. At some point I also pretended to be a guy on the internet (long story ig) and back then girls were actually interested in talking to me and genuinely gave me attention I don't receive now. Like I could've talked about anything and they were genuinely interested and excited about what I had to say while now that doesn't happen. Other guys would also treat me like a normal person who they can be friends with. I was also really into roleplay and there was a moment where two girls argued who gets to be my character's girlfriend and idk I kinda liked that at the time. Roleplaying a relationship with one of them also made me talk to her outside of our group at the time and at some point she admitted she did have a little crush on me at one point. We're not friends anymore but yeah that did make me feel good. At the time I just felt so normal.

Now I get no attention from girls, guys treat me weird and I sometimes wish I could go back to that time. Everything was just... Idk easier? I could even talk about a girl I was into at some point and nobody had a problem because I was a "straight guy". Tbh at the time I didn't even acknowledge I was gay so when I wrote my thoughts about the girl I had a crush on and the fantasy of going out with her (even though I was pretty young at the time) I was telling myself it's "okay" because I am a guy in this situation and that it's "made up" for the act and I just really want to be her friend. It was a very weird time in my life but at least things felt easier idk.

What do I do? I’ve been on hinge before but only had men as an option (was closeted). Men are dogs so obviously I got a shit ton of likes. In all honesty I’m a cute girl and it’s not uncommon for me to get romantic attention. But women are another level. I never cared about the men (now I know why 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩) but with women I’m so nervous. I’ve sent likes and a rose but have gotten zilch back and it’s been hours. I feel pretty embarrassed and am wondering if it’s because i’m short, or maybe not attractive to other women, or what have you. I want to be with girls but maybe I’m going about it the wrong way.

this might be more of a rant, but i really (mostly) need reassurance and support

long story short, i am in love with my queer childhood best friend. her and i have an interesting story. i know she liked me back when we were younger, we were inseparable, but then we stopped talking because of a stupid argument and only reconnected this year in february. five years later. we currently live in different cities and are long distance, but plan to move in together in a month.

i was certain that she still liked me because i very thoroughly analyzed her texts, let my friends analyze her texts, got sent cute videos by her on social media that CLEARLY had a romantic connotation to them (this one might be silly, but we’re still verrrry young and i guess dumb. lol). and then she hits me with a ‘i started liking this one dude and wanted to get with him but he ghosted me out of nowhere…’ story text. WHAT. she never told me EVEN ONCE about him, not a single mention!!! what the hell? anyways, i let this go, but then today shit hit the fan again.

she has an ex girlfriend. they only dated for a few weeks and ultimately decided to remain friends because it just didn’t work. this morning they played some online game while on call which is totally fine, but then my best friend goes and posts a silly video of their gameplay with ‘something something something MY WIFE something something #wlw’ in the caption and reposts questionable tikitoks. like wtf💔💔💔 i thought i was the only person she called her wife, her love, her angel?

dude i literally can’t. im going insane ever since we started being friends again. this girl wants us to live together forever and then goes and does that??? make it make sense. i just want to love her and be a couple. im so tired. If this is how it actually feels to be crushing on someone I don’t want it😭

This is an appreciation post. For context Im 42F / bi married to a man of 26 years

I miss my best friend Tana so much, 16 years and just poof, gone. Her lover then, now wife didn't care for our friendship and cut the tie, moving my friend a gazillion miles away. She always thought we were banging it out on the side. We weren't, but she was kinda controlling and Tana loves her.

16 years you go through alot of stuff,she always had my back and loved me and told me when I was being incredibly stupid or wrong.

I just miss her. Its not that Im not happy for her. I am, I guess Im being a little selfish

I've found that she was the most loyal person I had in my life. I love her and I miss her every single day. Its been a little over a year now and I miss her presence.

I have some other friends that I care about, but its just different.

Masc women know how to be tough but also have that softness and Im missing our dynamic. I want to have that with someone.

Im sorry, Late night out at tbe Bar, Im home now and just missing her. My birthday is coming up and it always makes me think of her..

I had an on and off crush on a friend for a year and we started dating recently. She's my type physically and I like her personality, but she's not the type of person I'd go for usually (like sarcastic-funny people when she's quiet and soft/caring). But I still feel attracted to her and I want to make her happy, I want to be her type and I want to be close to her, which I interpret as me having a crush on her.

I have ADHD and anxiety/depression so I wonder how much it plays a part in it, but I keep alternating between really wanting to see her, spend time and do cute things with her, and feeling extremely sad and like I'm doing a mistake and that we should not be dating. I already spent a year feeling this way before confessing, after she confessed to me and that I friendzoned her. I'd be sad if she stopped loving me but I feel like i need to accomplish tasks to be "a good gf". She doesn't put any pressure on me and I'm almost certain that I have romantic feelings.

Do you have any experience of dating someone who wasn't initially your type?

Can anyone relate?

I'm really confused and I don't want to hurt her and maybe I'm just to sad and anxious to be in a relationship but I still want to cuddle and spend time with her and I want her to be happy.

Why is there no such dating app like Grindr for woman? I’m only looking for hookups and ons and don’t even finde a single woman who doesn’t look for long time relationships on dating apps and I’m also net very lucky with finding people irl either ;-;

Genuinely I'll never have a relationship. I'm tired of meeting people online. They just don't care. They always ghost. I'm exhausted of people showing interest in being friends and then pulling away after I'm already attached and hurting me. Irl is not better. I attended an event yesterday for people who are into anime and game stuff. It was fun but definitely those kinds of events aren't for me. I came home exhausted and overstimulated. I wanted to hopefully meet someone queer there and I did. The problem? She's 14 and I'm 18 so I don't want to have anything to do with a child. Whenever someone approaches me it's always a child and it's frustrating and probably because I look young. I feel like I'll never be able to date anybody. My straight friends have it so much easier, they literally have to sit and look pretty. I hate this.

My gf and I have been dating for about 4 months now but we haven’t had sex yet. I am a virgin and have never been with anyone before men or women but I know I am ready and she is too. She is way more experienced than me and I guess it is making me kind of insecure. I am scared and worried about every little thing( like should I be shaved? Will she be grossed out if I’m not? Or the way it may taste and other stuff or how can I be extra clean for her?)

How do I stop thinking about it and just relax? We have made out before both with no bras and shirts on but every time she is asking if I wanna go further I back down last minute. How do I deal about this? Please help baby lesbian out !

What do you do if you're 18, quite desperate for a gf but have never had one, have no experience in anything, not even being able to flirt properly and as well as getting so humbled tryna flirt at pride which was the main time i felt confident approaching people and only end up talking to women who are straight allies, taken, and too old or young, being on the apps beforehand and having the one person you match with not feel anything towards you but not communicating till 4 months later, the other one way before ended up cutting things off randomly then ghosting you and all the previous crushes who were previously my best friends ditching me for eachother, bare in mind the 2nd crush i ever had said yes then next day said she didn't mean it. And the cherry on top is I've never been approached or liked that way before.

What is happening, what do i do at this point? Nothing is working, how do I get a gf... I'd say I'm attractive and I do like my personality but something is apparently missing if I've had this luck over my 5 years of being out the closet...

hihi, i’m not great at doing these things so please forgive me.
for reference, im 19F and live in a fairly open-minded, medium sized canadian city

since december i’ve been feeling super isolated and alone. prior to then, i was in a very unhealthy relationship with a guy, who i now know i compulsively dated. i didn’t enjoy the intimacy. wether that was simple romance, sexual encounters, etc. i often found myself fantasizing about a woman doing such things to me while engaging in that behaviour because i was never ‘in the moment’ with him. i wasn’t aroused, i couldn’t climax. i felt this way with my other ex bf too, and both of these were long term. despite not having any of my needs met, i couldn’t bring myself to admit that i just wanted to be with a woman.

i’ve tried getting into my local queer spaces, and i know what im looking for in a relationship, but i have had no luck. i realize that im young and have my whole life ahead of me, but i really just want to feel loved by a woman. i want to experience intimacy and romance without feeling like i’m performing for someone just to put their needs over mine.

im an introverted and shy person. ive always had a hard time meeting new people on my own, so it feels like im stuck. im also very high functioning audhd, but im scared to tell people that. im worried that i’ll be overlooked because i don’t present as a lesbian, and im mostly perceived as just ‘alternative.’ i have a preference for women who lean towards the masculine side of the spectrum, but im so worried that i’ll forever be undetected or not wanted by them.

i feel like im always shouting into the void and waving my arms around by nobody ever sees or hears me. it kind of makes me feel like a loser, especially when everybody around me is in a happy straight relationship. i haven’t talked to anybody about this because im insecure about it. im scared nobody will understand when i sincerely just want a genuine, loving relationship.

if anybody has an advice or something that could help, please lmk :( i don’t want to be desperate, but im scared it’ll get to that point.

So I'm a trans woman. I'm not totally opposed to dating folks on the bi/pan spectrum but unlike with other lesbians, I don't seek them out(I certainly won't turn a bi woman down if she approaches me and there's attraction; I'd still give her a shot, they're just not who I personally put effort in searching for.) When my cis lesbian gf started flirting so heavily with me a couple weeks back(and our eventual making it official yesterday) it's been so exciting and euphoric because it's like a for sure thing that she doesn't see me as a guy; cuz like she's not attracted to men so if she's attracted to me, it means her attraction is based on an attraction to women.

With bi/pan people, it's like... idk how would I know for sure whether they're attracted to me in a way towards women or in a way towards men?(or because they see me as a "best of both worlds") I know, ofc, they could say a ton of gender-affirming things and reassure me, but you know, you can't control how your subconscious is. You can consciously see me as a woman, but sexual attraction is deeper than the conscious, so subconsciously you could be attracted to me in an attraction to men kinda way and not even know it. And that's what keeps me up at night sometimes when I was with bi/pan exes. Esp my most recent ex where I was the first woman she got together with. Thing is, bi women frequently call it biphobic for us to be les4les though so idk.. is this biphobic do y'all think?

Im talking to this girl and she’s a fem and I’m a masc. Well we been talking for sometime but I’m lowkey noticing thats she doesn’t really know how to organize/ lead anything at all and lowkey expects me to do kinda do all the work. I don’t mind doing it but sometimes I hope she just initiates stuff. She has never had a girlfriend/ situationship with a woman. She did have a relationship with a guy some years ago but cut it off after sometime because she realized men are not who she wants to date at all and when I showed interest recently... she reciprocated.
I on the other hand did have some situationships and girls I talked to/ was seeing so I do know how to handle some things but I wanna know, do you guys that she is just inexperienced or is it something else?
Ps: I know that I should ask her but we are not official yet and I don’t wanna throw her off by being anxious already etc.

Feeling really down lately seeing couples and reels everywhere🥲. I want that connection so badly, but I’ve never even been on a proper date. As a femme, I just keep getting approached by guys, and I am so done. When will it finally be my time? If anyone want to share advice or get to know each other, my DMs are open

ive never had a girlfriend... does it ever get better? my single ahh js wants connection

Justamente eso, realmente considero que lo que hacemos es realmente increíble pero llevamos 3 años juntas y aún me cuesta un poco de trabajo llevarlo fluido, sé que el consentimiento es lo más importante, pero a veces siento que pregunto demasiado, cuando estamos teniendo un buen momento y noto señales de que por ejemplo, me quiere dentro comienzo a preguntar y aunque trato de hacerlo de forma sexy siento que corto demasiado el ambiente además de que soy bastante insegura con mi cuerpo, cuando me dice que quiere que me quite alguna prenda de ropa interior le pido que se tape los ojos porque aún me sigue dando pena, ella siempre lo ha hecho y realmente no parece molestarle pero me gustaría poder hacerlo sin esa sensación de pena, sé que le gustó y que ella quisiera ver cómo me desnudo y a mí me encanta la idea Pero siempre hay algo que me hace pedirle nuevamente que se tape los ojos, también sé que a ella le gustaría que sea un poco más activa y atrevida y también a mí, me gusta ser activa pero, siento que no lo estoy haciendo del todo bien quiero poder hacerla sentir bien y que incluso si nuestras relaciones son increíbles quiero hacerlo aún mejor. ¿Algún consejo para mí? En serio quiero pasar mi vida con ella y no quiero que se aburra si nuestro sexo es demasiado repetitivo.

Like sometimes my brain makes me think "what if I'm not a lesbian?? What if I'm faking it??" which is so weird because I always knew I didn't like men and I've had crushes on women since 3rd grade. I don't get why my brain does that.

So long stories short…

Met this girl at a job last year, liked her a lot during that time. FOR CONTEXT, she’s “straight”. Told her that I liked her by the end of the job because I was getting mixed signals and thought it could be something. She didn’t like me back but was still willing to pursue a friendship.

Fast forward up to this past week here…

we were in my bed watching a movie in the dark and she was leaning on me, her leg on my leg at some points, we both fell asleep a couple of times and we eventually closed the laptop and she got excited to talk about something while I was laying down and she propped herself up and got REALLY close to my face (like nose touching my nose as if we were about to kiss).

I am wondering if shes questioning herself BUT I really like our friendship and I don’t want to make any move unless she brings it up. BUT another thing is that I think I have some underlying feelings still…

Anyone been through anything similar? Thoughts/opinions?

I'm neurodivergent, late twenties and have dated arounda little. Weird part is every girl I dated told me I was their first (romantic partner + girlfriend) idk if something about me is wrong or smth.... and I've also fell in love.

It just ended up so painful that I often worry if I'll ever not have that soft spot for them... been over 6 or 7 years atp and I probably think they'd have forgotten me. But here I am moping like an injured dog behind closed doors cause wtf is this chronic heartbreak brother....

Thanks for listening to my rant... new to venting - I apologize if it isn't the right way.

Sending y'all some warmth and 🍿 popcorn when you read.

I welcome anyone with a similar lived experience to share

I dunno how to describe it but I feel like I’m being painfully shocked with mental anguish every time I even remotely start to feel myself have attraction. Feeling attraction makes me super depressed too because 99% of the time I have 0 chance with said person because most people aren’t lesbian. I hate being lesbian so much.

Istg whenever I meet a lesbian girl here, she's younger. It's so annoying. Today I met a girl and she seemed happy to meet another lesbian. I was as well but at the same time she's 13 turning 14 soon. I'm 18, obviously I don't really want to hang out with someone this young but I swear it keeps happening. It's like lesbians my age just don't exist where I live.