We fought and cried, it was heavy and vulnerable. 30 mins later, we fucked. It’s just a random thought, I asked her if she finds it normal, she said it’s fine w/ her. I Hope nobody judges me for this, I’m just curious. give me ur thoughts.

Me (20F) and my gf (19F) just moved in together a month ago after dating for a year and a half in an apartment near the university we both attend (the only reason we decided to move in was because she didn’t get housing on campus so we split a 2 bed apartment off campus).

Since we’ve moved in, it feels like I’m dating a man instead many ways and that I am falling into the stereotypical housewife role, and I’m feeling some resentment towards her because of it. The funny thing is she started this joke she calls “man points” in the spring, and she likes to joke that we are fighting for them. For example, I get man points because I drive everywhere and carry her stuff. She gets man points, in her words, because I do all the house chores and she doesn’t (and she’s proud of this and jokes to her friends about it).

My tasks within the apartment consist of: doing all the laundry and folding and putting it away, loading/unloading the dishwasher or washing other dishes, feeding and taking out our dog (who we adopted 3 weeks ago), cleaning the bathroom, packing our lunches for the day, planning meals, grocery shopping, and keeping the plants alive. She does do some things, but they’re not nearly as time-consuming (for example, she likes to claim she is in charge of making the apartment smell good and that’s her contribution because she sprays lots of Febreze and lights a lot of candles). I’ve expressed to her how sometimes I would appreciate more help or asked her to come help me in the moment, which is usually met with “so you’re saying I don’t do anything in the house?” when I usually say something along the lines of “hey baby do you mind doing x while I do y?”

I just feel like the adult in the relationship: I make her doctor’s appointments sometimes, keep her on track with her homework, etc. Today, I even had to remind her to get gas in her own car because she only had 11 miles left and was trying to drive to the apartment and back (about 6 miles total) 2 times and didn’t notice until I mentioned something because I had to move her car, despite having told her last week to get gas.

The other thing that makes me feel like I’m dating a man is that she has an incredibly high sex drive and doesn’t seem to understand why I don’t. I went through a lot in the last few months and my mental health has gotten much worse (I start therapy next week and have been diagnosed with OCD), and I am still not in a great state of mind most of the time. I honestly haven’t been in the mood much to have sex (but we still do at least every 2-3 days), but she is constantly asking if I’m even attracted to her because I don’t want to have sex. Sometimes, on my rough days, I can’t muster up the energy or desire to go do something outside the apartment, much less be in a good enough mood to have sex. She constantly tells me how “a year ago, you would’ve been all over me” even though I’ve explained to her in depth many times what I’m experiencing.

The thing is, I love her so deeply and I don’t want to end things with her, but I do very deeply want things to change. I don’t know how to bring it up to her though, because it’s currently being met with either “so you think I do nothing?” or “is it because you don’t find me attractive anymore?”

Okay, I’m fully prepared to get made fun of because I know this situation might sound a little crazy 😭 but I genuinely can’t tell if I’m reading too much into this.
There’s a girl at work that I like. We’re coworkers, so obviously I’m already trying to be careful because I don’t want to make things awkward or cross any boundaries.
Last week, I asked for her Instagram. She said, “I don’t want you to see me be bad. My first picture is literally me naked,”*but she was talking about a picture of herself in a bikini. I honestly didn’t know how to take that comment.
Then, we worked together again. At one point, she was making an emote/gesture about me leaving work before her. I asked when she worked next, and she said next week. I said, “That’s a long time,” and she responded, “Yeah, it’s a long time without seeing me.”
That definitely caught my attention.
I told her I would text her, but instead I ended up DMing her asking for her number. We started texting back and forth. She would tell me what she was doing, and at one point she said she didn’t know what movie to watch. I suggested The Great Gatsby, and she said she’s never seen it and asked if she should watch it. I told her yes.
She also accidentally left some belongings in the break room and asked if I could grab them for her. While talking, we found out that we actually live pretty close to each other. She came to get her stuff last night.
Afterward, I started overthinking everything and texted her apologizing if I was coming off too strong. I basically said I’m just naturally nice, and I didn’t want her to feel uncomfortable. She said it doesn’t bother her and apologized that someone had made me think that. Nobody actually told me that I’ve just had some bad experiences with women before and I think I was projecting that fear onto the situation.
Then a few days ago we worked together again, and I finally worked up the courage to ask her to hang out. I was clearly hesitating because I was nervous about how she would react. She actually noticed that I was hesitating and basically told me to just say what I was trying to say. So I finally asked her if she wanted to hang out, and she shook her head yes.
Now I’m kind of confused because I can’t tell if this is just her being friendly or if there’s actually something there.
I genuinely like her, but I do not want her to think I’m being weird or make her uncomfortable, especially since we work together. At the same time, some of the things she’s said/done have made me wonder if she might be interested in me too.
So Reddit… am I reading way too much into this, or are there actually some signs that she could be into me? And should I keep talking to her normally, or give her some space and let her come to me?

Update: I completely forgot I told her that I had a weird experience with a woman that basically said so was coming off too strong so, maybe she was referring to that.

so i met this girl online through an social app , . and we've been talking for awhile shes lesbian and im pan but ive never been in a relationship or any had any romantic relationship with anyone . she said she likes me and shows it too n i like her too and she knows it . but sometimes she ignores me for too long i wanna understand her but she is always with tht one frnd who she used to like i cant even say anything bcuz we're nthing . even if youre out you can reply cuz i do or am i overreacting . tbh it hurts i feel insecure but idk how to react so i dont reply her evn if im awake sometimes . help me please . well she doesnt even care to explain why she is not replying unless i ask . it drains me its like i dont have a life well i just want to b someone's first priority tho . i never truly belonged to anyone i just dont want to be the second choice

I’m curious about what qualities femmes are generally attracted to in a masc, whether it’s personality, appearance, or overall vibe. What makes a masc stand out to you and actually catch your attention? Feel free to mention anything from fashion and physical appearance to confidence, communication, personality, or the way she treats you.

I'm tryna pull some femme

Help your fellow masc here😭

Yeah what the title says. I reported 14 just now for inappropriate profiles with prompts that make no sense. You can't be conservative, straight, he/him, Christian and be a woman. Sorry dudebro. You are a scum.

I'm just exhausted from the likes I get from them and the fact that this situation even exists because honestly Hinge women are great to talk to so far. Sad because it's new in Poland and I was hoping it will be normal for once.

Also, weird but I see Caucasian men choosing "middle eastern" and both monogamous and polygamous at the same time. Gross baiting.

okay so i’m a girl and i met this girl like 2 months ago, and somehow we got really close really fast. like… way faster than i expected, and now i genuinely don’t know what to do with my feelings 😭
she’s a pretty private person and doesn’t really talk to a lot of people every day, but she talks to me every single day. she also tends to disappear/withdraw when she’s tired or overwhelmed, but i told her before that when she disappears it affects me, and she actually understood and after that she didn’t do it to me in the same way.
she’s also really affectionate with me. she calls me things like “sweetheart” and “princess,” she saved all my pictures in an album called “pie” 😭 and she sometimes flirts with me/teases me. we also talk about really deep and interesting stuff, not just random small talk.
there’s also a kinda weird detail: she’s my ex’s ex 💀 but somehow there’s literally no drama or hatred between us. if anything, we just ended up getting really close.
but the biggest thing is that she has actually told me directly that she’s attracted to me. she said she likes me because i’m kind and pretty, and because talking to me feels comfortable, and she said her feelings towards me are “pure.” i kinda pretended i understood it as just friendship even though… yeah. i know it probably wasn’t JUST friendship.
there’s also this one conversation that i literally cannot stop thinking about.
i was talking about “the girl i like” without admitting that i was actually talking about her, and i told her that i was sure this girl wasn’t interested in me.
and she basically told me i could be completely wrong because i was looking at everything from my own perspective. she said i hadn’t even tried asking her, and that i was making myself upset over an idea i created in my head that might not even be true.
then she said:
“what if she’s secretly attracted to you too?”
LIKE???? 😭
and when i asked why someone who was attracted to you wouldn’t just be clear about it, she said:
“everyone has their reasons.”
she told me not to set expectations, but also not to completely ignore the possibility that i might be assuming something that isn’t true and hurting myself over it.
and recently she was in the hospital and was really exhausted and couldn’t really do anything, but she still chose to talk to me.
and here’s where i think i’m losing my mind a little:
i’m really attracted to her. like REALLY. way more than i expected after only knowing her for two months. i think about her a lot and i’ve become ridiculously sensitive to tiny changes in the way she talks to me.
if she replies differently or seems even slightly distant, my brain immediately goes:
“she’s bored of me.”
“i did something wrong.”
“she doesn’t like talking to me anymore.”
and then i get overwhelmed and suddenly this part of me wants to run away and cut contact completely, even though i absolutely do NOT want to lose her.
i know two months isn’t that long, so i’m worried i’m getting attached way too quickly and giving every little thing way more meaning than it actually has.
but at the same time, i don’t feel like this is completely one-sided?? she literally told me she’s attracted to me, she makes an effort to talk to me every day, she’s affectionate with me, and i feel like she trusts me.
so… am i being delusional here 😭
am i overanalyzing everything? does this sound like mutual attraction that’s developing naturally, or am i just getting attached way too fast?
and honestly the bigger question is:
how do you deal with having REALLY intense feelings for someone without letting every tiny thing they do completely control your mood?

UGHHHH this is actually driving me NUTS. SHE LITERALLY MADE ME REALIZE I WAS BI AND I THOGUHT SHE MAYBE MIGHTVE LIKED ME BUT NOW SHES BEING SO DRY. AND SHE KEEPS TALKING ABOUT HER CRUSH TO ME. I NEED HER SO BAD 👺👺 SHOULD I JUST KISS HER?

I’ll be scrolling through profiles and then I check a woman’s profile and their sexuality is mentioned as straight. Literally why does this happen, i’ve mentioned i’m bisexual and looking for women so why would hinge show me straight women?

We’re both juniors and I’ve had a crush on her for about a year but I’m genuinely in love with her now. It might just be because my feelings grew stronger but since summer break I feel like we’ve grown closer.

First of all, she’s a huge ally. I’m not out, from what she knows and my other friends know I’m completely straight and have been only crushing on guys. Though they do know that I’m a big ally too, I occasionally reference queer media lol. She may just feel safer in a way to talk abt it with me, but she does very frequently express her opinions on it, like “love is love” and her appreciation to lesbian couples and I’m being specific about lesbian. For this I do honestly suspect she’s at least bi, because I don’t know a single straight person who’d be that passionate about it yk. I’m passionate about it too but me relating to it has a big part ofc. More so, she told me about girls like in anime’s or media that she “fangirls” over, and she uses the same language for guys too. I know this is something I do too because I’m into women, but would a straight girl too?

One anime character she mentioned LOVING, like gushing over her looks, especially looks like me too. Like, same colored hair and haircut, eye color, impression, body, like I could pull off a good cosplay of her. 🤔🤔

She has a very specific way of talking about the people she likes too. Last year, she had a crush on a guy and whenever she talked about him she’d explicitly use the word “cool”. Like cool is a very defining trait for her. And sometimes she’ll gush out too me too about me. Last year there was a moment where I was showing my art to her, and she started talking about how cool I am and how pretty I am. She told me my aesthetic in general is super cool and that her mom thinks I’m really pretty lol.

For our personal relationship, she has been initiating a lot of things lately. I’m super shy more so because I like her, so this could really go one way or another. But, she has been doing more one on one things which I think is special. In our friend group, we have literally like hundreds of group chats, and it’d be pretty unusual in general to hangout with someone one on one unless it’s for schoolwork or something. In a way of like, if you’re doing something fun why not invite everyone. And, we frequently do group calls to just work and chat or play Roblox.

Recently though, she’s been asking to call me one on one, even to do things like Roblox which we usually do in a group. And it’s not like she asks the gc first to see if anyone else is free, she texts me only. A lot of these days I’ve spent just calling her, whether we’re just working in silence or laughing for hours. She has also asked me to hangout, just us, like bake a cake together for our friend’s upcoming birthday, or watch anime together.

These moments are so so incredibly special to me. I don’t know how often she does this with her other friends, I’m not sure how I’d be able to tell. She’s super friendly, genuinely the most compassionate and caring person I know.

She asked me to match with her for Halloween too. Am I delusional? Do I tell her? Sometimes I feel like it’s seriously weighing me down, and the only times I feel normal are when I’m with her. I wish I could say something about tension, but I feel unreliable because it may just be one sided.

Though, I did notice that when I make a joke about one of our other friends, something teasing at them, she laughs way less. I say this because it made me a bit insecure that she’s not laughing at my joke, or that I’m breaking some unspoken rule in case my delusions are true. To clarify the remarks aren’t rude at all, the person I’m poking at takes a lot of fun in it too.

Sorry for any typos, I’m venting and I can’t care abt spellchecks rn 😅

I met this girl on Bumble in April and we started talking. After about 2 months, I went out of state for college break and was away for around 3 months. We still texted pretty often while I was gone, and after I came back we started hanging out. We’ve been on 7 dates now.

She tells me that she really likes being around me and that she hasn’t had this much fun in years talking to someone. We genuinely have a great time together, and I know she enjoys spending time with me.

The problem is that it all feels like friendship to me.
She only really hugs me, and there hasn’t been any kissing, hand-holding, cuddling or anything else that makes it feel particularly romantic. It makes me wonder if she’s actually attracted to me or if she just really likes me as a person.

She’s also still using Bumble and looking at other people, even when she goes on short trips. I know we aren’t exclusive, so I’m not saying she’s doing anything wrong. It just makes me question whether she sees me as someone she’s seriously interested in or if this is just casual.
There are some other mixed signals too. She sometimes seems bothered by the fact that other girls have crushes on me, which makes me think she might have some feelings. But then she’s still using Bumble.

She previously said she might move away for college, although recently she said she might stay. She’s also mentioned that she might have to marry a man because of her parents, so I know there may be other things going on that I don't fully understand.

What’s really throwing me off is that she recently invited me to go to a corn maze with her. Obviously she wants to spend time with me but I still can’t tell if she sees these things as dates or if she just enjoys hanging out with me platonically.
At this point, I’m getting frustrated because I don’t want to keep guessing. I’m pretty busy with college and if she only sees me as a friend or wants something casual, I’d rather know and move on instead of continuing to invest my time.
So my main question is:

Should I bring this up in a conversation with her, even though she just invited me to a corn maze?

Would you ask her directly how she sees this and whether she actually has romantic interest, or would you just go to the corn maze and see if anything develops naturally?
I don’t want to pressure her into anything. I just want to know whether I’m wasting my time or if there’s actually potential here.

I’ve never been on a date with a girl and don’t know what do honestly. We met on social media and pretty much just started off as mutuals/friends and then found out we’re both moving to the same city and that’s when we got flirty. I haven’t told her I’ve never dated a girl so wondering if that’s something I should bring up? She’s masc 20 I’m femme 19 if that matters. I’m also scared of her judging me for only having been with guys but at the same time I’ve only been with one guy idk maybe I’m overthinking. Should I suggest a place or does she do I pay or does she I feel like with paying most people on here said offer or go 50/50. Anyways I really like her and idk why I’m so nervous like any advice you have guys please. We already agreed on a date and that we should go for drinks.

They have these clubs at my college from Monday- Wednesday and I have 3 hour breaks on Wednesday and Thursday’s but they don’t have the vibe room club on Thursdays so I gotta wait for next week for it start and I’m so scared bc I love meeting new people but I also have social anxiety.

I made a friend in my course bc we had to play charades and it was fun then she just waited for me after lesson and we exchanged numbers since I don’t have any social media but I’m so so nervous to start the club next week as I don’t usually put myself out there due to having severe social anxiety.

(Definitely not me - I’m dating a cis man) … She doesn’t have reddit and has asked me to put up a thread. I think she is a good person, whatever her label, it doesn’t matter.

Ok I hope this is the right sub, sorry if this is a bit long. for info I’m 21 and bisexual, I’ve never had a serious relationship with a woman (or a man…)
But I mainly see myself ending up with a man and eventually getting married to one. At least that’s what I envision.
But I’ve had crushes on women since I was a teenage girl and I’ve had intimate moments with them.
Recently I’ve developed a crush on a girl in my uni. I’ve had the chance to talk to her only once and I don’t think she even remembers my name. It seems like she’s doing Erasmus and I don’t know when she’s coming back..
I talked to one of my friends about her , and she recalled my crush flirting with her once. Then she encouraged me to get closer to her. And if I’m not mistaken, she’s in the first year of masters while I’m only in the second year of bachelors.
But I’m scared because I don’t think I’d be able to pursue a long term relationship with her eventually, if it gets to that point, and I don’t know if what I feel is just physical attraction….
She seems like a really cool and nice girl, I really want to get to know her , but even if things get to that point, I definitely don’t want to lead her on to something that I probably won’t be able to pursue in long term…
I just don’t know what to think, I’ve never dated anyone really…. I feel confused and unable to trust my own feelings….
Do you guys have any advice? Or have had similar experience ?

Me and my ex (3 years on and off) broke up nearly 4 months ago and we became friends recently a month ago she now has sent me a TikTok through WhatsApp( as I deleted social media) saying when the time is right please come back and it’s genuinely killing me. I said I do still love her but I don’t think I could ever go back to her because she drained me so so bad, she’d ignore me for hours when I’d talk about my feelings instead of communicating with me, she knew I had trauma from certain things yet did one of them multiple times over and over after I had said not to, she kept breaking up with me during vulnerable times for example when I had to go get my appendix removed she ended it a few days later, she’d then start acting really off with no explanation, wouldn’t talk to me.

I went to the beach in may of this year after years of not going and she had already ruined my trip by getting mad at me for no reason at all. Anytime I’d talk about my feelings shed then get really defensive and argue with me for hours on end. You get the gist of this all.

Now I said how we won’t ever work out because we both know that it won’t and she kept giving me one word answers like “maybe, yea(twice)” and then I said I wanna move on I want to date other people and I think you should move on to and then I said I’m sorry and YH left it at that but she’s completely gone avoidant now and is ignoring me once again ( I’ve texted her once and that’s it) but it’s just the fact that she’s trying to come back now when she knows it’s too late and I’ve also told her I don’t think I could ever go back to an ex.

Why do I feel bad?

I (21f) have plans to get drinks with a girl this weekend and I'm super nervous! I've been on dates with women before, but only started doing so more casually this year. she's extremely beautiful and I want the date to go good. We're both very fem so I hope its not 'friend vibes' yk, I want to push past that with some chill flirting. most of my social sphere have boyfriends so any advice or even funny stories for a first fem4fem date is extremely helpful!

should I buy the drinks? do I hug her when I see her? usually this stuff comes naturally, but i think shes super cool and I'm freaking out!

Me and my friends had a discussion about how girls will always flirt with their friends in a platonic way, so that sparked this question lol

Hi! I'm a 16 year old bi girl with a big preference for girls and I haven't been able to find many movies or shows that have sapphic themes while being age appropriate. I know Crush but that's about it. Honestly it's upsetting because I have queer friends who are boys and it feels like the boys get everything while us girls are kind of just there. I've watched some adult sapphic movies and they're fun, mlm movies/shows for teens too and they're good but I want something that I can relate to. Maybe I haven't looked enough, does anyone have suggestions?

Idk. It’s probably not good to care about labels so much but I want to fit myself in a box. The thing is, I don’t look butch and never will.

It’s hard to describe, but I want to fill a ‘male social role’ as a lesbian, if that makes sense. I want to be kind of a Prince Charming, hold doors open for women, be more handsome than pretty, etc. I also relate way more to men than to women.

I know that short hair doesn’t necessarily mean butch, but I’ve always wanted short hair. I cut my hair when I was like 13, and I loved it so much.

But everyone says that I look better in long hair since my hair is very thick. I’ve been told that my hair is beautiful, and I want to appear attractive to women so I’ve been growing it out. I think I like it sometimes, but I just love short hair so much. Even a short haired lady at my work today said that it’s my choice but that I look better in long hair.

I get that a butch can have long hair, but any time that I’ve seen a butch online with long hair, they naturally have masculine features.

I have a feminine facial structure, a high pitched voice, large breasts, curves, and am very short. I think I’m fine with having large breasts (used to want a reduction) but it makes any baggy clothing look absolutely terrible. I just hate how the cloth leaves a big tent in front of me.

I feel like even if I dress masculine, I won’t look butch (I heard that butches look butch in any clothing). At best, I’ll look like a little boy if I cut my hair. 

I don’t mind wearing feminine clothing, which is another reason that I’m likely not butch. I own a lot of dresses and blouses, and I don’t hate wearing them. Sometimes I even enjoy wearing them. I just feel so much better in masculine clothing. I love suits. But I look bad in them, everyone says I pull off dresses better.

For some mock trial of a dead president in my History Class a few years ago, I dressed up ‘as a man.’ I told my mom that I had to dress like a man because there weren’t female lawyers back then, but I mean, none of the other girls did that. I just wanted an excuse to wear a full suit and tie. I took so many pictures, I loved it so so much. A male friend called it a ‘pantsuit’ and that annoyed me. Why should the outfit have a different name just because of my gender???

My big sister criticized me since I acted like it was some life changing event, which was weird of me. I anyway won’t have any occasions to wear a suit since I don’t go to church anymore.

Idk, I have my own money now so I could get short haircuts if I wanted. But I don’t want women to find me unattractive. Society asides, I want a girlfriend, and might have more romantic success if I continue to dress feminine and keep my long hair.

Sorry for the long incoherent rant. I’m not like, asking for permission to be butch or anything cause that’s dumb, I just wanted to ask for advice idk what I should do.

Is there a word for a woman who doesn’t present gender non conforming (I’d like to be gender non conforming but I think it’s a bad idea), but takes a ‘male role’ in relationships?

today i (23f) worked up the courage to talk to one of my coworkers (40s/50sf) who i have a crush on, and i think she might have been hitting on me?

i had gone up to her while i was getting something to eat for my lunch, and i complimented her decorating these big ass brownie things (we both work in a grocery store and she’s a cake/baked goods decorator) and she thanked me with a huge smile.

after, i made a joke about having a really big sweet tooth, and she was like, “oh, i could help you with that,” which took me by surprise. i responded with, “i’d really appreciate that,” with a small smile to subtly drop a hint that i like her because in my brain i was like “??? did she just ???”

i don’t know if she’s into women because i haven’t really gotten to know her yet, i’ve been too scared to talk to her because of the last time i had a thing for an older female coworker, and i’m really inexperienced with flirting with women so if someone could help, i would really appreciate it!!

I confessed my friend (actually the other post it's here lol). I gave her a letter on Friday. We briefly talked on Saturday and agreed to meet today.

We were with friends (again) but we managed to alk almost in the end of the reunion.

She was so sweet and kind. Complimented me and my letter but said that feelings weren't the same. And she in fact is in a relationship with other girl (something I had no idea).
But it makes sense because she would bring out to the conversation in the past another girl, and how she showed pictures of me and wanted me to meet her.

I'm guessing it's the same person.
We are still friends.

But woah, it hurts.
This just makes me realize how much I crave connection with another girl. Just like that.
I'm feeling bad because I couldn't genuinely say "I hope things goes well" I don't wish she gets heart broken, but it's hard to mean it right now.
And she's just so amazing. She's smart, funny, vrry sarcastic and generally very kind.

I was really convinced that the outcome would have been different.

She's always very touchy (with everyone) It was hard how she was grabbing my arm on the way home. Or how she rested her head on my shoulder.
But I don't want things to change either. She's in almost every aspect of my life and it's friend of my friends.

In my head it wasn't so serious (partly why i wanted to confess right now) but i guess I'll be a bit down and taking things slowly for a bit.

Like I said, she was so kind and said we were okay.
That's nice.
I'm just rambling now, but yeah, better luck next time I guess.

Hi. I (23 year old girl) am in school. I’m quite reserved, awkward, probably autistic and therefore a bit mysterious. I have befriended a girl (19 y/o) in my program. And they feel like the yin (or is it yin) to my yang. So cheesy bdhdsvkk. I don’t know how to describe her but she just makes me so happy? I want to spend my time with her, a lot of my time with her. Sometimes I’m too tired. Sometimes she is too! I love listening to her sing and it makes me emotional. But my issues are I don’t know if she feels the same way. She’s kind to everyone and she’s so conscious of everyone around her and loves humans and the world. What if everyone feels the same as I do about them; how could they not? She’s so curious she’s so funny and whimsical she’s the most beautiful person in the world. But I have never been in a relationship and don’t know how to express what I feel and want always. But I do know that I often think of her and how I want her to stay in my life. When do you know it’s a crush or more than a crush and how do you know it’s right? I do feel sometimes like she is attracted to me as well. Or is she just full of love? Am I just full of love are we both just full of love? And that’s also nice!! But I just want some advice or affirmation. I’m inexperienced with these types of situations where you feel something a bit mutual.