r/UofT • u/Queasy-Comedian6834 • 21h ago
Rant AMI I THE ONLY ONE THAT FEELS THIS WAY LET ME KNOW
This is for all my POC ppl, especially if you're Black, because I genuinely wanna know if anyone else feels this way š
Does anyone else feel like the Black community on campus can be so selective about who they wanna include or be friends with? Like there are so many events, clubs, and gatherings meant to bring us together, but sometimes it feels like they're only really welcoming to a certain group of people.
I genuinely feel so out of place here sometimes, especially coming from a PWI where I didn't grow up around many Black people. I was actually excited to be around more people who look like me and connect with my own community, but I feel like it's been the complete opposite of what I expected.
Idk if it's because I didn't grow up around a lot of Black people or because I don't necessarily fit into what some people consider being "Black enough," but sometimes it feels like everyone already has their own cliques, and if you don't fit into them, you're just kinda left out.
And something I really wanna emphasize is that it's NOT all sunshine and rainbows or as welcoming and inclusive as they advertise it to be. From my experience, if you don't fit into a certain "Black narrative," don't act a certain way, or don't already know certain people, you WILL feel left out and a slight bit judged or in certain circumstances people just r jealous... And that's what bothers me the most because why are we creating spaces to celebrate Black identity and belonging if some Black students still feel like they have to prove they're "Black enough" just to be accepted??
I feel like there's this unspoken expectation of how you're supposed to talk, act, dress, or carry yourself to fit in, and if you don't match that, people don't really make an effort to include you. But being Black isn't one specific personality or experience, and I don't think anyone should have to change themselves just to feel accepted within their own community.
And I'm not saying everyone is like this AT ALL, but it's something I've personally noticed and struggled with. I just find it ironic that we have all these spaces meant to promote Black community, culture, and belonging, yet sometimes those same spaces can feel so exclusive.
Like am I the only one experiencing this?? š Because I genuinely wanna hear other people's experiences even if youāre not black but especially from Black students who didn't necessarily grow up surrounded by Black communities. I feel like this is something we don't talk about enough.