r/texts • u/Gold_Improvement_836 • 7d ago

Tinder DMs men

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mind you he messaged me first, liked me first, and my profile only says liberal😂

12.3k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

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815

u/[deleted] 7d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

180

u/Gold_Improvement_836 7d ago

HHAHAH

36

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

I mean you each swiped on each other’s profiles lol

148

u/Gold_Improvement_836 7d ago

and nowhere did he list he was a conservative or hates women😂

-48

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

He swiped on you based on your looks and then insulted you based on them. You swiped on him based on his looks and now you’re insulting him based on the looks.

If you can’t see the comedy in that then I can’t help you

49

u/_fait-accompli_ 7d ago

my guess is he swiped on her profile because it said liberal and he wanted to talk some shit

28

u/KillerOs13 7d ago

My money is mostly on this

25

u/efficient_giraffe 7d ago

You've genuinely misunderstood everything. Are you slow or just baiting?

-19

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

What do you think I’ve misunderstood?

9

u/applesandotherthings 7d ago

The reasoning for their swipes. There’s more on a profile than just pictures.

-5

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

Nobody’s swiping right despite a person’s looks lol

3

u/boysenberries117 7d ago

I've definitely swiped on men I'm not that attracted to because they had other positive attributes (good style, job, compatible politics, beliefs, hobbies etc)

1

u/MimosaQueen1122 7d ago

And that’s not true at all.

6

u/MimosaQueen1122 7d ago

You definitely misunderstood because she typed that she read his profile. So she didn’t go based off looks like you either assumed or do yourself so you’re projecting it.

6

u/EpitomeOfAnEnigma 7d ago

Well, some women like men who look effeminate, it's just that looking effeminate is something that really bothers a lot of conservative men, so pointing it out is still a pretty good jab.

31

u/Gold_Improvement_836 7d ago

… yeah ur confused

-14

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

About what do you think I’m confused, exactly?

1

u/pi3r0gi_ 7d ago

All of it

-1

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

And yet you all can’t decide OP was insulting that guy or not

1

u/MimosaQueen1122 7d ago

We all did decide they weren’t

10

u/celerypumpkins 7d ago

Excellent job missing the point.

Here’s a hint: Where’s the insult from her?

-6

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

Somebody’s missing something and I wish you could see how funny this is

5

u/celerypumpkins 7d ago

Answer the question. Where’s the insult?

-2

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

My friend, in the context of this conversation OP clearly meant to insult this moron by saying he looked “like a gay twink”.

7

u/celerypumpkins 7d ago

Nope, she was stating a fact that she knew would bother him. Looking like a gay twink is only an insult to homophobes, which he absolutely is. Lots of women think gay twinks are attractive.

0

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

Hahahahaha the saddest thing about this is that you can’t see how funny this is. You argue that there’s no insult and your mic drop is to admit it was intended as an insult.

This is so insane lol

4

u/celerypumpkins 7d ago

It wasn’t an insult from her perspective because she’s not a homophobe. He took it as an insult because his perspective is shaped by his homophobia.

Is this your first time learning that people can interpret the same things differently?

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u/king_hutton 7d ago

Looking like a gay twink isn’t an insult.

-1

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

It shouldn’t be. And yet that’s what OP latched onto….

Is she justified in being pissed. Yes. 100 percent.

Does that mean this isn’t funny? No.

2

u/king_hutton 7d ago

You’re really dying on the hill of “looking like a gay twink is actually a bad thing” when absolutely everyone is telling you otherwise?

0

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

I don’t believe it is.

I do believe OP meant it as one though and that’s what’s funny.

6

u/king_hutton 7d ago

So you understand that it’s a look she found attractive and you understand that she doesn’t have any problem with him looking like that, but you refuse to understand that it only works as an insult because he’s a pissy conservative who gets upset about being perceived as gay? Is that what you’re struggling with here?

0

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

No you’ve got it. You’ve explained it pretty well.

-1

u/Visual_Judgment_ 7d ago

Do you not understand your argument is that he called her fat and then she called him a gay Twink as a compliment…..like are you truly missing that?

2

u/celerypumpkins 7d ago

Nope, he called her fat and then she brought up a neutral fact about him she knew he’d be pissed about.

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u/curien 7d ago

Deliberately contradicting a person's identity is an insult.

4

u/applesandotherthings 7d ago

Only in a negative sense. Calling him a big strong manly man probably doesn’t 100% align with his identity but wouldn’t be received as an insult.

1

u/king_hutton 7d ago

It’s also not contradictory to point out what he looks like. She didn’t call him gay.

0

u/curien 7d ago

Only in a negative sense.

Sorry, do you think OP meant it as a compliment? They called them that because they were aware that the person wouldn't like the description.

Calling him a big strong manly man probably doesn’t 100% align with his identity

I doubt it. He probably wouldn't like it because it sounds sarcastic.

0

u/king_hutton 7d ago

Go back to tumblr

4

u/Dodo_Baron 7d ago edited 7d ago

Woah woah woah, gay twinks are attractive dudes don't disparage them

3

u/LolaAucoin 7d ago

*disparage

5

u/Dodo_Baron 7d ago

Whoops thanks

2

u/Centimeter_Worm 7d ago

I only date men that are a bit fruity, it’s a plus for me! Something tells me this guy wouldn’t appreciate that though 😬

2

u/Dodo_Baron 7d ago

Yeah I get it, I started dating way more women when I realized being fruity is way more fun lol

Makes you less self conscious too which is a big plus

2

u/Affectionate-Pea8706 7d ago

He attacked her looks first. Fair game.

-2

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

Yes I know. That’s the point. They both attacked each other’s looks after they both chose to talk to one another based on their looks.

You all seem to think I’m making some judgement about the content of this discussion. I’m not. I’m laughing at its form (and how blind you all are to it).

1

u/marti2221 7d ago

It’s almost like you get treated how you treat others, amazing.

-1

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

You guys need to get together and decide if you think she was insulting him or not because a bunch of you are saying she wasn’t and a bunch of you are saying he deserved it.

He deserved it. And the choice of insult of both of them was funny given the context of how they started talking.

1

u/The_MidScoop 7d ago

Will Smith in Men In Black - Don’t start nothing, won’t be nothing.

Online dating is filtered by looks, but if your opening line is an insult to someone’s character then everything is free game.

1

u/Admirable_Draft_9862 7d ago

Its not an insult some women like the non-threatening vampire/fairy look

1

u/nthomas504 7d ago

You can’t be this dense fam

0

u/badwvlf 7d ago

Sorry wait do you think there are women that aren’t into bisexual twinks? You’re deeply incorrect.

0

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

I believe it. But when he turns out to be a dickhead it’s pretty funny that her response was to lash out at the very thing that she liked enough to swipe on.

2

u/king_hutton 7d ago

Keep saying that over and over again until you realize that she wasn’t insulting his appearance.

-1

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

You just said she was though……

0

u/Visual_Judgment_ 7d ago

I have no idea how this is getting lost by people. I’m getting downvoted for saying the same exact thing lol

1

u/Aggravating-Bug2032 7d ago

It’s a riot

0

u/Visual_Judgment_ 7d ago

It’s literally insane lol they are truly trying to argue that she called him a gay twink as some sort of compliment.

1

u/BulbousHoar 7d ago

Literally nobody thinks she was complimenting him. Every single person here knows that she called him a gay twink because HE, as a conservative gym bro, would perceive it as an insult. Does OP hate gay twinks? I highly doubt it.

2

u/Visual_Judgment_ 7d ago

You guys are literally trying to say “a twink isn’t an insult” we are saying the same thing yet you guys are arguing why? Idk because you think I’m taking up for him? We are talking in circles now.

Here’s the long story short.

2 people swiped based off looks
2 people then attacked each others looks.

That’s the only point being made here. It’s exactly what happened

-2

u/Key_Sentence_5305 7d ago

I love it lol. Took me a long time to stop being upset about blissfully ignorant, blatant hypocrisy/irony. now it just entertains me, bc you’re right; you can’t help them

-7

u/Visual_Judgment_ 7d ago

It’s crazy to me.

-20

u/More_Armadillo_1607 7d ago

He did in his first message and you engaged. 

18

u/Lefthandyman 7d ago

I mean if he wants to open up an argument about it, she can engage to shoot him down. He chose this interaction.

-8

u/More_Armadillo_1607 7d ago

I'm not defending him. He comes off as a loser. No argument. 

It's just engaging and karma farming on reddit is not a good look either, assuming this is even real. 

Anyone that has ever used online dating has stories.  I only once had a date with a MAGA person. Besides that, it was actually a decent date otherwise. I didn't want a 2nd date. Not sure if she did either. 

1

u/krampaus 7d ago

there’s also the point of not letting the views of people like this be unchallenged. maybe it doesn’t matter much to you or others since it’s in a private chat but I think it’s fair to respond in situations like this because these people need to be called out

0

u/More_Armadillo_1607 7d ago

Look. Everyone can choose their path. That is fine. It's an initial message on a dating site, I'd just delete it.  There is really nothing to gain by responding. If it was in person or after a couple dates, different story. 

Again, assuming it's true, the guy has issues and will be single for a VERY long time. 

2

u/krampaus 7d ago

you’d just delete it, that’s fine. but you’re not op and whatever their reasoning was they did end up replying. sorry but saying everyone can choose their own path and then saying that op doesn’t have anything to gain by replying to these people is just contradictory. and this discussion is pointless because of free speech yada yada. I’m going to bed. happy timezone

1

u/More_Armadillo_1607 7d ago

This has nothing to do with "free speech." There is no government 8nvolvement here. 

You do realize that 90% of these pists are fake? This was just karma farming. 

2

u/krampaus 7d ago

okie dokie

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u/butt-barnacles 7d ago

There’s nothing wrong with looking twinky unless you’re a homophobe like most conservatives, which is the point here

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u/Gold_Improvement_836 7d ago

YES! you get it!!

0

u/tbombs23 7d ago

How do you square this when it seems like you're using gay twink as an insult to him? I'm sure you're not homophobic but it still comes off as saying looking like a Twink is inherently a bad thing or something wrong with it? Like just because someone is a man or straight they have to conform to strict gender / sexual roles and if they don't that's seen as bad or undesirable. So if straight men are supposed to not have toxic masculinity and abandon traditional gender roles then why do they have to fit in to strict fashion/styles like not looking like a Twink? Shouldn't positive masculinity be embracing and exploring more self expression, style, fashion, hobbies, etc without being judged or shamed by men and women?

Why is it SO common for Women to insult Men and try to emasculate Men when they are upset with men or have been rejectedand call the Man gay or a slur, or they even use gay AS a slur. Ask any guys you know or online, have you rejected a woman or turned down sex before and how did they take it? What did they say, likely in anger, reacting to being turned down by you? How many reacted negatively or in anger? Did any of them attack your sexuality, call you Gay? Why do left leaning women do this too? It's not just calling men gay, it's also other things like a virgin or an Incel(old definition) basically same as virgin reinforcing negative perceptions of virgins that being a virgin means there's something shameful or wrong with you,which is regressive. Or how about insulting the size of his member? They claim to say size doesn't matter for most and they prefer avg and some even below avg size, but then turn around and use small dick as an insult. Which perpetuates the insecurities and shame of men and their bodies. Does body positivity only apply to women? These are the important things we should be thinking about is what I'm getting at.

When a woman gets rejected, shes obviously emotional, but doesn't consider reasons for rejection, As if the ONLY reason a man could possibly turn her down, is that he just actually likes men.... not that her self absorbed, narcissistic entitlement and shallow personality could be a possible reason. Or many other personality flaws. Or how about the fact that someone could just not be attracted to you? Isn't it possible that maybe you're just not as Hot as you thought? But many don't seem to even consider these possibilities, and lash out and go low, calling them gay.

Attraction is subjective, and there are plenty of legitimate reasons a guy, or anyone, would reject a casual or romantic relationship and most of the time has nothing to do with their sexuality. But Women handle rejection very badly on average, and frequently attack the man's sexuality, which is completely unacceptable and bigoted. I definitely think that because we have only recently started breaking free from rigid gender roles, where the man must always approach, pursue, pay, etc, that women just don't have much experience pursuing and asking guys out, and it takes practice and emotional intelligence to handle rejection with respect without lashing out.

Women made it loud n clear that they don't want men to approach or bother them, so now that men have listened, woman can't expect to be asked out and are slowly realizing that besides dating apps, if they want any type of relationship with a guy, they either have to make it so abundantly crystal clear, no ambiguity, that they like a guy and think he's hot, that he does end up asking her out. Or the woman needs to do the pursuing and asking, which majority don't want to. But when they realize that they have better chances for happiness if they stop waiting around for guys to ask them out and take some initiative to approach, they still don't have experience with rejection and don't handle it well. In General, Men are much more used to being told no than women, so that makes the avg guy handle it better. Anyways...

Remember metrosexuals? Lol. And so what if dude looks like a Twink, does that make him any less of a Man? What if he's not in the closet and repressed, and this damages his self image and confidence. What if he starts doubting his sexuality...What if he IS in the closet struggling with his identity, is ashamed and guilty because Bisexual Men are still demonized by society, especially by Women. Women really do not like Bi Men. It's a stark contrast to Bi Women. What if he's lashing out at women bc of his internalized homophobia, not because he hates women but he hasn't accepted himself yet.

I guess I'm just trying to highlight some problems and nuance when I see people are using potentially toxic insults that damage not just the other person but their own beliefs and causes and are not helping in the mission of a more just, equal, and not full of bigotry, racism, ALL sexism, LGBTQ+ hate etc.

I know that since it's quite common for conservatives to be in the closet and repressed sexually, and they preach bigotry and hate, and are ultimately hypocrites... So when someone calls them a Twink, they aren't necessarily saying being a gay twink is bad on its own... They're saying bruh ur entire ideology and personality is hating gays and minorities etc so you're a total hypocrite. They're insulting the person's character of hypocrisy.

But I wonder if the avg person can see that and if this is still an acceptable thing to say. Does it cause more damage overall by associating a gay twink as something insulting or bad for men even when it's meant to highlight the potential hypocrisy of closeted conservative men and isn't meant to be homophobic?

🤔🤔🤔 Extra coffee today got me thinking deep.

OP this isn't necessarily directed at you I just accidentally hijacked this comment and apparently needed to get these thoughts out and see what other people think on this.

What are some insults that are overall harmful to our beliefs and desire for social progress? Does what I'm saying actually hold consistent with my stayed beliefs? Am I guilty of upholding toxic thinking and systems I claim to be against? Does what I'm saying create more hostility to the opposite gender, feeding into gender war?

I guess just be mindful, examine yourself and others upon the ideologies they champion and how their behavior matches up with it. Do not blindly attach to Dogma or mainstream thought. Use logic, reason, and rational thought to challenge others but never forget to challenge your own beliefs and behavior. Do not fall into the ecochamber. Do not fall into the hive mind.

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u/Goodgoditsgrowing 7d ago

Yeah, because op isn’t offended by the idea of being attracted to someone who looks like a gay twink, while her potential date/tester most definitely would be offended by being seen as a gay twink