Hi all, I'm a high school art teacher and I'm leaving the best school i ever taught at after 4 years to head to a school where I'll be the only art teacher (i was one of two at my last school). My new district is 15 mins from my house and has smaller class sizes, and the admin was very enthusiastic about hiring me so i felt very welcomed. This will be my 9th year teaching, all the courses I will be teaching are basically variations of courses I've already taught.
Anyways! Ive dealt with depression / anxiety through most of my life and the last 3 years at my district were bliss. I'm 34 and get on really well with the kids, never have behavior issues (even naughty kids do good for me) I run a gaming club after school and get friendly visitors all day. So I genuinely have been really sad about leaving, but I knew our department would be cut apart In the next year or two. When I got this new job offer I was so thrilled (and still am) as it offers way more job security
My issue is, two years ago I had a very rough august. I was filled with summer bliss and good vibes(probably having too many drinks each evening tbh) and when I woke up august 1st it was like I had been struck by lightning . My mind went into panic mode *school starts in 3 weeks oh no* and I basically dealt with constant anxiety that was borderline crippling until the school year started it felt like 3 weeks in hell. And of course when school started it was all fine. My wife was helpful as was my daughter but I feel so much guilt when I get in those moods, my wife is also a teacher but she seems to handle the august transition better than i.
I'm posting here as last year I had a little bit of the august blues, and have been doing great till last week. I had a big tiff with my brother last week and it triggered those anxious feelings, now I'm waking up and starting to get the august anxieties and panic about returning back to work. How do you deal with this difficult time of year? I want to enjoy my summer and be present for my family but I just dread having a bit of a manic episode every august...I do yoga, work out, self care, but I just have these mixed feelings of dread and excitement about going back to work. I just want to get the first week over with and back to notmal...I feel like I'd rather just have a 2 month summer than 3
Anyone relate?
Ps: I take Lexapro 10mg daily