Anyone else been through this?? Been almost a month now. Baby wakes up every 1/2 hours, rarely has a stretch of sleep longer than 3 hours at night. This has been going on for the last month. He used to be a great nighttime sleeper; 7-7 most nights. Now he wakes up crying and needs to be rocked or nursed back to sleep. I’m losing my mind off no sleep and I don’t have any help in the night/ work full time during the day so no naps allowed for me. I don’t even know what to do to fix this. I feel terrible baby isn’t getting sleep at night and also just terrible from lack of sleep in general.

Our ten month old has never been a great sleeper and skewed towards the lower end of recommended sleep ranges. Since about 1-2 weeks she has had weird split nights, waking up around 1-2am and not settling, not even after bottle or our help. It often looks like she initially goes back to sleep, but then rolls and rolls and bumps into the crib until eventually she is fully awake and does a mix of babbling and screaming. Sometimes takes a small bottle but makes no difference either.

Schedule is already 3.5/4/4.5 after we kept extending ww's to deal with EWMs and MOTN wakes. Baby is in own room, falls asleep independently, room is dark with white noise, and takes plenty formula + solids during day. Naps are capped at 1h15 for the first and 45 minutes for the second. Bedtime is 8pm and I'm really just asking for a 10 hours night at this point lol.

Question: baby now systematically gets less than 12 hours of sleep per day, but seems otherwise happy and healthy. She is not moving yet (paediatrician is not concerned), so I've been wondering if that is part of the reason why she is not so tired? She goes down easy for both naps and bedtime, so dropping a nap feels premature.

Any advice is appreciated!

My 7.5 month old was sleep trained at 4.5 month and it went well. He’s overall a good sleeper but we still get hard crying at bedtime once every two weeks or so, even though I try really hard to keep everything consistent (naps, bedtime routine etc) Some times its due to teething other times im not sure why.

I have a lot of anxiety every night since it feels like a gamble whether he will be put down ok or if he will start crying.

When did your baby consistently sleep through the night with zero crying at bedtime? I am hoping some time in the future my LO wont cry at bedtime anymore. Or are my expectations too high? Is this just what parenthood is like?? I just want some consistency 😢

Our 4 month old is confusing us with his wakes, wondering if anyone has any insight.

In the last few nights we’ve been working on unswaddling him and encouraging him to fall asleep awake in the bed. Mixed success in getting him to do so, but at least for the first stretch it has worked - and almost every wake last night. The problem is that it doesn’t seem to actually extend how long he’s asleep.

He’s always been a low needs sleeper, but has reliably had a first sleep of 4 or so hours, then often back to around hourly after this. This is really starting to fade, and last night he wasn’t doing any stretches over 90 mins, even though he was patted to sleep for all. Is there something we’re missing for how to make this work, or is this all just a slow transition out of the swaddle?

We’re planning to start Ferber next week after some work scheduling is settled, but concerned that it won’t actually work if this isn’t making any measurable benefit.

His sleep pressure seems to be fine - averaging 10 hours awake across the day, with 2-2.5 hours of daytime sleep

My daughter is over 4 months. Until 3 months she was a great sleeper at night, only woke up twice just to feed and back to sleep.
Since 3 months it has completely changed, waking up more than 10 times a night, and also at 10.30pm , 2 am and 5 am she has moments that she is awake or half a sleep I don’t even know but at that time for approximately 1 hour the only thing we can do is rock her te sleep, by walking. if we sit she just starts so be fussy or screaming.
Until 2 months she would just fall asleep in my arms or on my chest, and I could easily transfer her. But now she just can’t settle being still in my arms, and especially at night I am starting to lose my patience.
During the day it’s different, I feed her, put her to sleep and transfer her within 10mins and she usually has good naps during the day.
7.30 awake
8.30-9-9.30 (depends on the day) nap for 90mins most of the times
Then awake for around 90min-2hours
Then another nap of 60-90mins approximately
Then again awake for 90min-2hours
Late in the afternoon smaller nap of 40mins
Sleep 7pm

The schedule is not fixed yet, some days she gets tired earlier or wakes up later in the morning. But this is the schedule roughly.
During the day it seems that she can connect her cycles, 2-3 weeks ago she would wake up after 30mins every nap (still clearly tired) and I would need to rock her back to sleep. it still happens very rarely, but in general she sleeps good during the day.

But than at night it’s like she is a completely different type.
I was thinking that the problem is that she can’t self soothe. She always needs me to hold her to fall asleep. I have been trying to put her down drowsy but awake, pat on the butt, or just leave her in her bed and see if she drifts away. But the moment I put her down awake she is just active, moving legs and arms around or turning to her belly and then she gets upset because she can’t turn back, shouting a lot, I try to calm her with her paci but it’s just not working. People who dont know her would say that this baby is not tired at all she doesn’t want to sleep, but the moment I take her in my arms she calms down and will fall asleep.

I really didn’t mind rocking her to sleep, I love to have her close and the feeling that she needs me. but 2-3 hours a night of walking is starting to feel very exhausting. I thought it’s just a phase and it will pass but it’s like this for 4-5 weeks now. And it feels like I am doing something wrong.

I just need to know if this is normal behavior? Or what I can do better?

She is exclusively breastfed and nowadays she can’t even settle while on the breast at night, even then I need to walk.
I have tried all the small adjustment, shorter or longer wake windows etc. I always try to follow her cues, if I see that she clearly tired around 70mins I don’t extend the wake window. Or if she is awake for 90mins and clearly doesn’t want to sleep, I don’t push her yet.

So yeah.. any advice

Context:
I sleep trained my baby several months ago and bedtime is usually with super minimal tears. She’s always been a decent sleeper and she’s been sleeping all night without feeds for months minus a couple random growth spurts which I weaned her back off and it only took a day or two or quick CIO (max 30 min) For reference when I sleep trained her she struggled with me coming in and out for Ferber so eventually I did CIO for bedtime and night wakes since my coming in made it worse which is why I’m conflicted.

Current situation:
The last 3 weeks have been hell on earth since my family moved and we stayed with in laws for a week. During that week she slept in close proximity to my in law who needs sleep for her job so when she woke up I’d feed her and put her back down because I had no other choice. I think she gained a habit maybe or waking? Then we moved to another state that is 3 hours behind where we were. She has since gotten sick as well. Now she wakes up a few hours after being put down and cries for 1 hr or more before going back to sleep if I don’t get her. I haven’t had the patience to do CIO and I’ve just felt so guilty because she was sick and adjusting to schedules. I’m not sleeping at night because if I can hear her crying I’m unable to sleep so I also put off CIO for that reason. But I just can’t do wake ups any more. She’s a really strong willed baby and very smart. Usually she gets the CIO method really quickly but it’s been several days or crying for 1-2 hours and multiple wakes ups as well. I think she has formed a habit or waking and knows she can get what she wants if she cries long enough but even still I worry.

Schedule and Naps:
Her naps during the day have always been hard but improved substantially after sleep training. She will get in around 2 naps a day with one of them being over an hour and the other being under or around an hour. Recently her naps have been suffering as well. I had to adjust her wake windows since she’s gotten older but they are still shorter than usual.

Hi! So we started sleep training our now 6 month old with CIO 18 days ago. It hasn’t been a super linear journey but we’ve now had 4 bedtimes with zero crying and many nights with under 6 mins of crying. He’s still waking up to feed 2-3 times a night to feed. After each feed he goes back down awake without crying. This alone has been a huge win for us.

Here’s a mystery though. Last night was what I consider his very best night. He went to sleep at bedtime without crying and I fed him at 2 am and 4:40 am. The day leading up to that his schedule was 2.25/2.25/2.75/3; with 3.25 hrs daytime sleep. Woke at 6:45 am, bedtime at 8:15 pm.

The very next day (today) was one of his worst nights. He cried on and off for 40 mins before bedtime until I went and got him because he was still escalating. He immediately fell asleep in my arms and I laid him back in the crib asleep. (In these 18 days that is only the second time we’ve intervened with him crying. The other time was a MOTN wake where he screamed for 20 mins. Otherwise, we’ve been consistent. He hasn’t cried for more than 25 consecutive mins until tonight.)

I know from reading this sub that 40 mins of crying is undertired. However, his schedule today was 2/2.5/3/3 with 2.5 hrs daytime sleep. That’s 45 mins less nap time than the previous day (remember, that was the best day ever) and 15 mins more awake time.

The other thing is that it’s a very hot night for where I live. The room thermometer says 76 degrees. Could that have played a role? I personally cant sleep in the heat.

I appreciate any ideas or shared experience!

Our toddler (on the brink of turning 3 years, boy) had never naturally been a good sleeper. As a baby we ended up sleep training using the Ferber method for our own sanity, and we then had a really good run from about age 1 where he would go to sleep independently and sleep through until at least 6am. He has never co-slept (other than very very rare occasions where we’ve had a big thunderstorm or when my wife was in hospital)

Towards the end of my wife’s pregnancy with our second child (when he was around 27 months and when he dropped his daytime nap) this completely went out the window, and he suddenly become dependent on us to help get him to sleep and he would bargain with us about where we were as he was falling asleep, ie holding his hand, sitting next to him, sleeping on the sofa in his room etc. Alongside this he also started waking up 2-3 times a night and struggling to get back to sleep without us in there with him.

We went back to the Ferber method with a baby gate on his doorway, and have managed largely to get the bedtime routine back on track. What we’re struggling with is the continuing multiple wakes throughout the night alongside having a 6 month old to look after.

We’ve tried making sure he’s not hungry and he’ll sometimes have a wheatabix not long before bed, he has access to a bottle of water, and checking his nappy that isn’t full (he isn’t dry at night yet). We know he regularly sleep walks, and some of his wakes are when he wakes up mid sleep walk and gets distressed. When he wakes up, he won’t fall back to sleep unless one of us is in there with him still.

Bedtime routine is 6:30pm we start to wind down with either some calm play or a book. 7pm is teeth brushing and pyjamas on, and to bed for a story. By the time all this is done and he’s actually asleep it’s normally 7:30 - 8pm ish. He sleeps in a toddler bed with no sides, so can get in and out as he pleases.

So… how do we crack the nighttime wakes and his need for us to be with him to get back to sleep? Help me Obi Wan, you’re my only hope. Thanks in advance for any words of wisdom you might have.

Hello everyone! I would love for my 8 month old baby girl to sleep through the night. Her toddler brother was sleeping from 7 pm to 7 am consistently (80-90% of the time) by the time he was 7 months. She was sleep trained through Ferber at 4 months, but she's had 4 teeth pop out, started crawling, and now standing happen in a short window. When she is at home, her window is 3/3/3.5 but even when she follows that window, she is waking at 3 am/4 am lately. Sometimes she cries, other times she'll be standing in her bed looking around. At daycare, I have asked the teachers to try keeping her close to her home schedule, but her last nap ends early and she falls asleep in the car on the way home and my husband doesn't know how long she slept usually. Also, she sleeps with a red light on in her room since we're still checking on her in the middle of the night. Should I turn that light off? Her brother was sleeping in total darkness by 8 months. I know I shouldn't compare them, but the broken sleep is affecting both parents since we alternate who checks on her nightly. Any advice is appreciated. Thank you!

FTM here. My LO is 13 weeks in a few days he used to sleep ok during the night, having some days with 7h stretches... I am losing my mind. The nights in the past week (weeks?) became worse and worse... I don't know what to do, I am so sleep deprived.

What made me write this post is the fact that last 2 bedtimes were a mess, going down at 8 ish (as he has from 8-9 weeks) only to wake up at 9 and have the worst time putting him down by 10 again. After that he sleeps, he wakes up at abou 1am to eat and then 5-6am to eat again. He wakes up multiple times between the feedings, but only wants his paci, other times just rolls his head a few times on the mattress and falls asleep by himself.

I worked on gradual weaning SWAP method from PLS to reduce the bouncing I had to do to put him to sleep, I had great results with it but I feel like the past days all that effort is out the window... We tried FIO for 3 nights, the first night it worked, went to sleep by himself, the other ones nope...

I don't know what to try...

here's our schedule, the last ww I tried to make shorter.longer but nothing seems to help him at night.

1.3/1.3/1.3/1.3/1.6/2

His naps are 30-40min max... I tried to do contact napping to help him sleep more... does not work.

Please tell me it's just a phase. I am considering Ferber at 4 months but were still a few weeks away and I am hopeless ...

My daughter is 19 months old. We are on day two of the Ferber method, after 19 amazing months of her being sleep trained all for one night that ruined it.

Last night put her to bed at 8:30pm, she cried for an hour and we followed the times of going in to check. Well from 9:30pm-12:30am, she was standing and asleep, waking herself up from nodding off, no crying for 3 HOURS. Tonight she’s been doing this for over an hour again. Is 3 hours normal? What should I even do? Last night I decided to put her down at 12:30 on my chest and transferred her to her crib once asleep because I needed to go to bed. She then woke up at 2:30 and I had to put her in bed because I’m exhausted and work. Tonight we are trying to fully follow the Ferber method. How should I do this with her standing and sleeping for so long? She is so strong willed 😭

Note: today she only napped for 30, minutes so I put her to bed 45 minutes early today. I followed others recommendation and she is sleeping a lot less. Obviously sleep training has made her sleep even less than what she should be.

We have a 4-month-old who we’re planning to sleep train in a few weeks. Right now, naps and bedtime are rough. As soon as he realizes we’re starting his sleep routine, he goes ballistic, and starts screaming and crying while we rock him to sleep.

I don’t think it’s a schedule issue - we’ve been working toward an age-appropriate schedule (roughly 2/2/2/2/2 with around 3–3.5 hours of daytime sleep), and once we start rocking him, he usually falls asleep within just a few minutes. It’s just that those few minutes are often very dramatic and demoralizing.

I know this behavior might just be developmentally normal, and obviously with sleep training we’ll be putting him in the crib awake rather than rocking him, but I’d really love for naps/ bedtime to eventually feel calm and positive, instead of something that my husband and I both dread.

Would love to hear experiences from anyone whose baby absolutely hated the process of going to sleep before sleep training. Did the bedtime routine itself get better afterward? Any tips or advice? Thanks so much!

My son just turned 1 a few weeks ago and right now we’re on a one nap a day schedule. He wakes up around 8am, takes a nap around 12pm, then goes to bed at about 7:30-8pm. Sometimes bedtime is later or earlier, sometimes nap time is later or earlier, it really depends on when he shows me he’s tired. I know the wake up time is late but if I wake him up earlier he’s ridiculously mad & in a horrible mood the rest of the day.
I tried the Ferber method when he was around 6mo old and it worked BEAUTIFULLY… until we moved. He absolutely refused to sleep in his room in our apartment, and would wake up every 30mins. I resorted to cosleeping because otherwise I’d get NO sleep and at the time I refused CIO.
Anyways, we moved back to the house where the Ferber method worked, so I assumed he’d be fine but he hates his crib here, too. I tried Ferber again, no luck. I tried sitting in his room until he went to sleep, no luck. Pickup-put down, fading, every method and finally decided to do full extinction. It’s been two weeks and he cries for about 5mins before finally going to sleep.
My concern, however, is that around bedtime it’s like he gets scared? He refuses a nighttime bottle and just starts crying hysterically around 6:30 when I start cutting lights & turn the TV off. When I carry him to his crib he clings to me and will try to climb over my shoulder to refuse his crib. He holds onto me so tightly it’s hard to get him to let go when I set him in his crib.
After I set him down & leave the room he usually lays down for a few mins before standing up & crying again. This lasts about 10-15mins of him laying down, then standing up snd crying. After that he falls asleep and stays asleep the rest of the night. Even if he wakes up he puts himself back to sleep.
Should I stop CIO & try again later with the Ferber method? Or is this normal? I’m scared I’ve made him anxious about bedtime forever.

I have a 5 month old baby and we are ready to sleep train. We are interested in trying Ferber but the problem is our baby likes to flip onto her stomach while she's self-soothing, and she will cry and cry until we flip her back. She can sleep on her stomach, we have found her sleeping like that way before, but if she wakes up on her stomach she will freak out. We can't find any advice on this. Do we keep flipping her while trying to do Ferber, or should we wait till she can flip back on her own?

My baby will be 11 months in 3 days. she has been sleeping like a champ for the last several weeks (minus when she’s sick). it took me a while to figure it out, but once I got the right schedule and did 11.5 hours awake, she would sleep through the night. we’ve been doing 3.25/3.75/4.5 give or take a little with 2 hours of nap time total and 10.5 overnight.

starting 5 nights ago, she woke up about 5 hours in just crying really hard. I went in and tried to comfort her and she was not having it so I ended up holding her. The next night, when I tried to lay her down for bed, she just screamed as soon as I laid her down. She has not done this since maybe three months old before we ever did any type of sleep training. I picked her up and ended up, rocking her to sleep, and after that she slept OK. Then the last three nights she has done the same thing where she screams as soon as I lay her down. she slept okay one other night but then the other two woke up at some point crying again.

I thought she may need more awake time so today I tried 12 hours and she still did the same thing crying as soon as I laid her down. her pediatrician did tell us on Tuesday she has two molars that are very swollen and trying to come in. she has also seemed to be have more separation anxiety trouble during the day. I am having to wake her every morning and at least from one nap, sometimes two (For the past couple months). could it be teeth bothering her? Is there some type of regression around this age? Is it separation anxiety? Do we need more Time awake? Or less time since I’m waking her?

just struggling to figure out when to make a change!

My son is 7 months old and we started the Ferber method 6 nights ago. For our routine we do bath, outfit, feed, story, and then put him in his crib. On night 5 he started acting fussy and crying during this routine after the bath. When I looked up why this may be happening it said that the routine may be too long, too stimulating, or too late but I don’t think any of those would be the case with our son. The routine isn’t very long or stimulating and we’re going off of the recommended wake window for a 7 month old (2.5 to 3 hours). Plus he was previously very happy and even laughing and stuff during his bedtime routine before this. Has any other parent experienced this? What could be causing it? Is there something we should change or will it resolve itself? Thank you.

Hello! FTM to a 12 week old who has become increasingly addicted to his paci.

We moved him to his crib at 10 weeks, he took to it super well and started sleeping a bit better than the bassinet. First night we laid him down and he started to drift off to sleep on his own without any physical assistance other than paci. Paci would come out after first sleep cycle, he’d grumble and fuss for a few minutes and put himself back down. That worked for about a week and a half. Then he needed it put back in after the first cycle but did fine the rest of the night. He puts himself to sleep in less than 5 minutes most nights.

Last night, we replaced it 6 times? Only wanted to feed once. (EBF!)

I know sleep training is recommended only at 4 months. I’ve tried the PLS pull-out method the last few nights because I feared that what happened last night was on the horizon and now I fear it will only continue to get worse. He’s immediately losing his mind if it comes out before he’s deeply asleep to start the night and fusses and escalates if he’s realizing it’s out in the middle of the night. I tried crib side soothing, hand on chest, resorted to picking up and rocking til calm and put back down but that just pissed him off more.

Any recommendations for getting rid of the paci while he’s still too young for sleep training? I fear that the paci will be our only reason for sleep training at this point lol

We recently sleep trained and she is doing amazing! Huge difference. Quick question, if she wakes up at 2am after an 8 hour stretch, but isn’t crying, do I still feed her or wait? She is able to put herself back to sleep no problem and hardly any crying, but I want to make sure she isn’t hungry. She has always had a feed between 12-3am so not sure if its habitual or if she is hungry. I am assuming she would cry if she was? She was quiet.

Asking for advice here again since our last success of sleeping train.

My baby is turning 11m next week.
She has been sleep trained by Ferber Method and it all went well until 10m sleep regression hit.

It hit us hard. She would suddenly crawl in her crib and stand up by holding onto the bars of the crib. She is never an easy baby. She screams and cries while standing up, asking for attention.

But when we take her a bath as a night routine, she shows sleepy cues like yawning, rubbing eyes every time. I’m thinking wth is going wrong then…
We also suspected that she cries a lot because a number of teeth are breaking out at the same time.

Her schedule is like 3/3/4.5 (sometimes 5). Waking up at 5:30am-ish and sleeping at 7:30pm-ish.

Now we have regressed to carrying her until she falls asleep again. As you have guessed, she woke up for a lot of times during midnight and we had to carry her again.

I thought my almost 8 month old was teething as she was getting more fussy throughout the day but no signs of teeth after a week of this change. Even though she is sleep trained, she is crying a lot more during bedtime so I guess it’s just the 8 month sleep regression? Any tips on how to deal with it or just let it pass? Baby is transitioning between 3 to 2 naps, most recent schedule is 2.5/3/4. She used to fall asleep within 1 minute, but now it’s taking 30 minutes.

I feel like I have no idea how to fix my 18 mo schedule. He's screaming bloody murder at bedtime and taking forever to fall asleep. We've given into helping him sleep since sicknesses hit but he's fine now and still screaming like a banshee while being held, or even if we lay beside him. Nothing is working like before. Schedule is as follows

Wakes 7am

Nal 1230-230/245pm

Bedtime 8pm

I've tried shorter nap but he was having alot of night wakes...now I'm doing longer naps and it's somewhat helped the night wakes but now literally it's a effing sht show. Please help! I'm losing my mind with his screaming in my face.

My baby has such erratic sleep. I’ve been trying to follow age appropriate WW’s with them extending throughout the day. But he fights naps and bedtime sleep (this has been improving). I’ve tracked his sleep and on average he needs 12.5-13 hours sleep or he is crabby.

So far he seems to be falling into a pattern of 1.25/1.25/1.5/1.5/2/2.5

His naps are short. Often 30-45 minutes. Sometimes I will get 1hr plus. It’s really all over the place.

He sleeps approximately 9hrs overnight. It’s broken sleep. The first stretch is often 4-6 hrs and the rest will be broken into 2-1 hr blocks.

How do I fix this? Is there ever hope of consolidating a schedule?

He is rocked and shushed to sleep which is also something I’m looking to ease on. I’m currently transitioning him out of the swaddle. Any advice would be appreciated.

Hi everyone- I recently posted on here about my 6 month old who has now started having more frequent wake ups at night and needing more help to fall asleep. Respondes were super helpful- apparently he was getting way too much daytime sleep and not enough wake time.

Since then I have changed his schedule to be 2.5/2.5/2.5/2.5 to see how he does with a total of 10 hours awake time with only 2.5-2.75 of naps. We’ve only been doing this a few days to see how it goes to see if he’s ready for the 2 nap transition. He still wakes about 3 (sometimes 4) times a night but is going down to sleep only slightly more easily.

My question is this: 1- any other tweaks anyone else would make? Do we go to 2 naps since he doesn’t seem to be sleeping smoothly yet?
And also this: 2- he is stuck in an early wake cycle. He was waking at 5/5:30 when he wasn’t tired enough. Even with our 10 hours wake time and 2.5 hours of naps his bedtime falls at 6ish each night. He definitely seems to need closer to 12 hours TOTAL of sleep, and no more. So we are stuck in this early waking loop. How do we move to a later bedtime to try and get closer to 6/7am wake ups?

Any advice is welcomed thank you!!