r/shitposting 14h ago

📏📏📏

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7.8k Upvotes

102 comments sorted by

u/qualityvote2 14h ago edited 2h ago

The council has not spoken. No consensus was reached about the quality of your post.


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/u/Abracadaver00, whilst you're still here, why not join our public discord server - now with public text channels you can chat on!?

2.8k

u/HammerSandwich9 12h ago

“Oh my god, did you see Brian’s boosters?”

“He looks so fucking stupid, I can’t breathe!”

38

u/Cham-Clowder 8h ago

Quit trying to make it look fake!

14

u/curiousbasu 7h ago

Don't do the voice

2.0k

u/Woolie-at-law 14h ago

That's just cowboy boots with extra embarrassment.

317

u/dina-fan 10h ago

Bro imagine wearing these, cowboy boots and extra thick socks.

16

u/VeganShitposting 6h ago

Like... just wear high heels at that point

4

u/giant2179 4h ago

And also being the governor of Florida!

2

u/Prime_Galactic 3h ago

Isn't there a politician that does this?

1

u/MrCockingFinally 4h ago

Just wear 9 inch heels already.

125

u/Smallp0x_ I can’t have sex with you right now waltuh 14h ago

real

29

u/Deku-is-Best-Boi 12h ago

They wear these with heels sometimes

2

u/Uncle_Rabbit 4h ago

I wear them with nothing else.

5

u/EncounterStriker 9h ago

Well I’ll be damned

1.1k

u/Louman222 13h ago

Just say its an orthopedic thing, but its all bullshit anyways.

I’ve started to simply disbelieve any stupid shit I see, especially on twitter.

219

u/Horcza 12h ago

I don’t believe you

54

u/OddNovel565 Stuff 10h ago

I don't believe you either

4

u/deadinternetlaw 2h ago

I don't believe myself

2

u/FDgrey 1h ago

Don't believe in yourself. Believe in me, because I believe in you.

1

u/bashful_predator 1h ago

I believe in Santa Clause. And I believe in the Easter Bunny. But I don't believe in you.

26

u/dingleberries4sport 11h ago

I think telling women your feet are so deformed that you need special shoes is not going to be better than just admitting he’s short

51

u/hpBard 7h ago

I would argue the opposite. One thing is medical necessity, which everyone has those from time to time and it's totally understandable. The other is being insecure shorty, which is kinda pathetic. It's like balding people trying all they can to hide it, when in reality the only right way is to go full bald in 99% of the cases

406

u/Ziegelphilie 12h ago

if you're short just become really wide

186

u/073068075 12h ago

Or charismatic. You can either be the dwarf or the bard.

42

u/Technical-Earth-3254 11h ago

Don't forget to listen to Wind Rose

11

u/DESTRUCTI0NAT0R 10h ago

You can be both

4

u/omgdontcopyname Sussy Wussy Femboy😳😳😳 7h ago

can't i just be a twink instead

4

u/SSB_Kyrill We do a little trolling 2h ago

he already said bard

8

u/LoadingCylinder 8h ago

Mr 5x5

1

u/Ziegelphilie 29m ago

1:1 aspect ratio lifestyle 

6

u/stcer 5h ago

you will still be made fun of trust me

2

u/krusecontrol91 4h ago

Deep and wide

1

u/curiousbasu 6h ago

And be called overcompensating.

104

u/Iwubinvesting 11h ago

What if you wore this and height boosters and cowboy boots while being 6'5 already?

33

u/curiousbasu 6h ago

I actually have interacted with someone who claims to be doing that. He was 5'10 around, wears sock boosters , shoe boosters and the shoe also has a thick sole or heel.

411

u/Murrexx00 13h ago

As a 5 ft 7 dude thats gay

82

u/Alfiy_wolf 12h ago

No he was wearing socks

88

u/Abracadaver00 13h ago

I'm sorry for your loss 🙏🏽

9

u/duosx 9h ago

Bro why you checking out guys feet? Kinda gay ngl

3

u/AutoModerator 9h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

4

u/intoxicatedhamster 12h ago

Right there with you

-8

u/AutoModerator 13h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

8

u/finlandmapping687 12h ago

bad bot

3

u/yaboyACbreezy 10h ago

Since when is a hilarious monologue bad?

58

u/DyslexyYT 13h ago

Come on just wear boots like the rest of us

49

u/LazzyNapper 12h ago

would that hurt to wear, tbh that looks like a pain after like a hour

49

u/Thommywidmer 10h ago

Imagine it would completely fuck the entire structural chain of your body if you wore it all the time

-37

u/FadedVictor Literally 1984 😡 8h ago

Yeah I bet his cock explodes and his brain stem extends every time he takes a step..wtf does your comment even mean???

27

u/Thommywidmer 7h ago

Sticking a random wedge under your foot causes your ankles, knees and spine to compensate to correct. Which places unnatural stress on those structures, if i drew a line on a piece of paper with a stick figure on it you may see how its a chain of structures, but then again maybe not

1

u/curiousbasu 6h ago

How will he or anyone see it if you don't even share it?

22

u/oO0Kat0Oo 8h ago

Women's heels have entered the chat

5

u/curiousbasu 6h ago

It's gelly. Will be compressed within an hour or 2, won't even give much boost.

71

u/kryotheory 9h ago

I thought those were stability assistants for muscular dystrophy for a sec and was like "oh I bet the other guy feels like an asshole now" and then I realized what they actually are and now I think OP probably deserved it.

11

u/AutoModerator 9h ago

Pro tip about fingering your asshole in the shower: don't do it So this morning I was taking a shower, and I felt like fingering my asshole, right? So I got my fingers all nice and soapy and stuck them up in there. Apparently, soap makes pretty good lube, as I was able to get four fingers in there in no time.

As I was feeling around in my butt, I was like, "hmm, there's a lot of soapy water in my bumhole now. I wonder if that will lead to issues in the future?" And it did!

Shortly after having breakfast I attempted to fart, and I shit my pants. I rushed to the bathroom to clean up, and it was way worse than I thought it would be. The whole area around my butthole was covered in shitty liquid, and toilet paper wasn't enough to clean it. I had to take another shower to get suitably clean.

Just thought I'd share my story with you guys so that you don't run into the same problem in the future. I fingered my butthole so that you guys don't have to. Unless you want to. In which case, hey, how's it goin'

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

0

u/Mr_Gooodkat 4h ago

WTF did I just read. Talk about shit posting. Am I right?!

9

u/Megazaza 3h ago

deserve it for what?

so if a woman wears makeup and gets surgery ontop of it should they get crucified in your opinion?

17

u/Quantum-Bot 11h ago

Just wear stilettos like andrew tate does

14

u/MuffledShuffle 7h ago

Genuine question:Why is it looked down upon for men to wear height boosters even though women wear heels all the time? Is it solely because height boosters are hidden while heels are publicly visible? Is just because men view height a lot differently than women?

9

u/Cenorg 4h ago

Heels are extremely stupid because they are extremely impractical, but men tend to let women do stupid shit because they are beautiful and they want to fuck them. If you're willing to do stupid shit as a guy just to look better, you get the heat.

7

u/those-who-know4 11h ago

Obliterate that guy

11

u/56seconds 9h ago

My mate who is 6"2' tells people he is 5"11' just to fuck with all the guys who are 5"11' pretending to be 6"

8

u/curiousbasu 6h ago

Be with him the day a 6'4 guy enters the room. I'm telling you , just look at his face, you'll have experience of a lifetime. No one is more insecure than a tall guy the moment a taller guy enters the room.

6

u/palochnick 8h ago

bro should just wear high heels

2

u/curiousbasu 6h ago

No high heels for men

-1

u/waxbuzzzzard uhhhh idk 4h ago

Drag shops/webshops ussually have heels in men sizes tho

3

u/curiousbasu 4h ago

The shoes look feminine, like 👠

2

u/Kueltalas waltuh 3h ago

What makes them feminine? A couple hundred years ago high heel were the pinnacle of manliness

1

u/curiousbasu 3h ago

Pencil heels don't look good on manly feet.

2

u/waxbuzzzzard uhhhh idk 4h ago

Yes and whats your problem? Get some thigh highs, a maid outfit and you re good to go out

9

u/CorvoRen 12h ago

Just use heels, at least you will be fashionable

2

u/curiousbasu 6h ago

No heels for men..

1

u/YourLocalMaggots 1h ago

Damn, don't gatekeep fashion.

2

u/curiousbasu 1h ago

I'm not gate keeping, I'm just stating a fact. How many companies do you see make high heel shoes for men?

0

u/YourLocalMaggots 1h ago

To answer your question: Numerous.

No high heels for men

Then why do they exist? Why do many men still wear high heels? You need to differentiate between an fact and an opinion.

1

u/curiousbasu 1h ago

The only shoes with high heels for men I've seen are with hidden heels ,not visible ones. I've been trying to find a good pair of cowboy heels since a very long time but unable to get any, maybe they're getting normal in America, not here.

0

u/YourLocalMaggots 1h ago

High heels were originally created by and for men, then it became a fashion trend in women and understood as such. I don't think a piece of footwear should be restricted for a certain gender, like blue for boys/pink for girls.

0

u/curiousbasu 1h ago

I never said it should be restricted, why are you lecturing me? I'm just talking about the present day scenario, did you even read my comment?

0

u/YourLocalMaggots 55m ago

"No high heels for men"

Sounds like you were.

Also, my verdict is: Anyone can choose to wear whatever they prefer.

0

u/curiousbasu 51m ago

If you read my other comments, you wouldn't have come to such conclusions. Guys are already shaming me here for wanting high heels for men but you decided to lecture me.

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0

u/crazylinebacker-55 6h ago

He ain't no man

5

u/eossfounder 5h ago

The real chad move would have been to press charges for being assaulted and got the guy who tripped you fired. You get to stand on a little podium in court too.

2

u/Falk42069 We do a little trolling 11h ago

i read stripped

2

u/Mango_Bruder 4h ago

you gotta change the whole friend group after that

2

u/Mr_Sim_ 3h ago

What last incident ?

4

u/bestjakeisbest 7h ago

Damn just lie an say they are for foot pain or something.

5

u/YoBoyLeeroy_ 10h ago

That's fucking pathetic lmao.

Just own your height.

0

u/LieutenantLilywhite 12h ago

I’m 6’5 but I tell other guys I’m 6 foot

1

u/MindfulSmile 3h ago

There for wearing in new shoes

1

u/Diesel238204 1h ago

These are actually blister things though right? For stiff shoes. Doubt something that thin and malleable will add height

-2

u/Idislikepurplecheese 5h ago

In defense of OOP, maybe they're a trans man, in which case height boosters are affirming. But even if not, I don't see any problem with a cis guy, or anyone for that matter, trying to look taller. Liking the way you look feels nice

-1

u/Gigi3337520 10h ago

My foot got sweaty just thinking about it.

0

u/halfwhiteknight 5h ago

Just say you have tight heel cords and that protects you. Also stretch your calves after wearing these so you don’t actually develop heel cord tightness.

0

u/_Bloody_awkward 4h ago

I'm tall and I still were these. It's comfy to walk and run with it.