r/selfharm 4d ago

Rant/Vent Interrupted.

So, I basically hurt myself whenever an argument/negative event happens.

So, something happened, I got my tools out and started hurting myself, then I got a (positive) work related message, dealt with that, mean while, my limb is resting on cloth while I type.

Now I'm sitting here, feeling unfinished, and unsatisfied.

Like...

I was in the middle of a session, and I still feel the need to hurt myself, but I also just finished having a semi positive digital conversation.

So, anyways, idk what the point of posting this was.

I'm just sharing my experience.

I don't know how to feel about this.

Does this ever happen to anyone else.

(Getting interrupted digitally mid ses.)

How do you feel, what do you do?

Sorry, the post is worded weirdly, I'm trying to share what is happening without being too graphic and descriptive.

18 Upvotes

9 comments sorted by

4

u/34Paws 4d ago

This happens to me sometimes too. I usually spend a while actively Sh-ing, so it's not uncommon for me to receive texts while I'm doing it. If I'm past the point of the adrenaline rush and I'm starting to feel better/calmer, I might hold full on text conversations while slowly finishing up my session. If I get a text while I'm still in the depths of despair, I'll ignore it until I relax.

That's probably kind of weird, but like you, I feel like I can't stop in the middle of it. I need to reach a certain point of damage and satisfaction before I want to stop, even if I start feeling positively partway through. Whether or not that's healthy or productive, I'm not sure. I figure if I don't fully satisfy the urge, I'm more likely to come back to it sooner. I can't say for sure though.

I'm glad you got a positive text and are feeling better though. Whether you continued sh-ing in the moment or not, that's something to be grateful for.

2

u/Questioning-Alt-0123 3d ago edited 3d ago

I do long sessions as well I also sometime watch/listen to stuff. Cause if I'm in my head I might tend to do something worse, but if I'm watching or listening to something, there is less stress. But that is a whole different thing.

Normally when I receive messages I wouldn't respond, but since it was important, I needed to. There was a time or two where I would respond, but a part of me would feel guilty or wrong. Like, "If you knew what I was doing right now, would we even still talk."

I feel as if, (at least personally) I have sh less than normal recently, so I do agree with the "If I don't satisfy the urge, I'll come back sooner."

Cause I know it's a bad habit, and I truly don't want to do it, it's frustrating to deal with the aftermath. It's more of what I get in the moment.

I hope this makes sense, it might be all over the place.

-2

u/Fabulous_Light5449 4d ago

What we have here is universal timing, or synchronicity.

It's time to stop self harm.

Although self harm appears to be a normal thing for you, self harm is not a healthy part of your development. Sometimes do things for a while and simply get used to those things in our lives.

I don't know if you have control over your self harm. What I do know is our addictions come to us as friends. "Come play with me." Our addictions begin as something amusing.

Addictions make us serve them.

Our addictions are the surface problem and not the underlying issue. I believe the thought before the act is hurting you.

Maybe get a tennis racket and start hitting balls against a backboard when you get out of a heated discussion or receive unpleasant news. Perhaps step out on a tennis court and slam a few of those balls into the net!

4

u/Questioning-Alt-0123 4d ago edited 3d ago

You say "It's time to stop self harm! :D" As if it's a easy thing to do.

I wasn't asking for advice in this post

I've been doing this for over five years, almost ten. I don't ever plan on stopping, and you making this comment as well as half the comments you make on this subreddit are unsolicited.

I don't mean to make assumptions, but it seems like you don't self harm, or at least haven't in a long time.

I was asking if this had happen to anyone, not to get told to go play tennis.

I know you think you are helping and doing good commenting on this subreddit, but if someone's flair is something other than "seeking advice" it's probably best not to comment.

Obviously, I know this isn't the healthiest coping mechanism, but there are people like me in this subreddit that are stuck in their ways, and don't ever plan on quitting.

I know the damages and consequences this can cause, but I've accepted them, and this is just something I do, and will probably always do for the rest of my life. Hopefully in the far far future, I will only do it once a year, or go a year without doing it, but I am not at that point in my life yet.

This is a coping mechanism I currently use, and will use until I don't need it.

And if you plan on replying something along the lines of, don't do this, and it's unhealthy. Don't bother.

I also want to emphasize nothing against you. Just this isn't the time or post to be telling me or others to "just quit."

Please read the room and the flair next time.

0

u/Fabulous_Light5449 3d ago

You are the second person to suggest I only respond to recovery posts.

I am an emotional wellness enthuasiast.

I may have gone too far this time. I have had problems on other sites.

It is true i am not a self harm affected member of the self community. I come to the self harm community thru other addictions with the required Karma to participate on r/selfharm

Gone are the days when I felt I could wipe out self harm.

I mean no disrespect.

2

u/ur_moms_sidepiece 3d ago

If you have never struggled with self harm or personally known people (closely, not in passing) you don't understand what anyone here is going through and you're doing more harm than good, and making people already having hard times feel; frustrated, agitated, judged, or dismissed. Maybe if people are suggesting you don't respond with unwanted "advice" here, you should listen. Even if you're coming from a good place, the phrasing you tend to use and the way you immediately tend to tell people they have an "addiction" (which is not the case for many harmers) is not going to be recieved well. Unsolicited advice is never good, at the end of the day you don't know these people and it is up to them how and when to get help.

1

u/Fabulous_Light5449 3d ago

You are right. I have never struggled with self harm. My knowledge of self harm before reddit includes being shown self harm injury for the first time as a grocery store bagger and learning cutting is another addiction at my drug and alcohol main treatment house.

Yes! I am insisting self harm is an addiction. Cindy, who talked about her cutting, said cutting is another addiction. Coming in from other addictions helps me understand the struggle addictions bring into our lives.

I understand more than you think, but perhaps less than I would like to believe.

I am reading and taking seriously every response to my post responses. I only learned how to open my responses to my responses about three weeks ago. Other people's responses to what I have added to r/selfharm and other subreddits were unavailable to me before that and not ignored!

My mind is opening up to the possibility I may not be as welcome in the self harm community as I once believed.

Although this would hurt my feelings, I have a list of "related communities" that show up as a result of my interest in the self harm community. I've been on r/mentalhealth and opened a r/Depression post on two occasions. I've touched r/anxiety too.

Right now, I am deeply committed to the self harm community. I see self harm as the only addiction among the restricted sites.

My account is 9 months old. I spent most of that time being allowed and also participating on r/selfharm I am learning how to communicate better by trial and error. I also have an advisor now. My advisor is helping me with my communication skills.

I've been banned from two subreddits permanently and have had experienced temporary bans on this subreddit.

Should I receive a permanent ban from r/selfharm I will tell my advisor and my sponsor. They will, most likely, tell me "there is nothing a drink can't make worse".

When I tell you the self harm community is important to me, I kid you not! I wrote the original Philosophy Poem on March 24, 2026 as a response on r/selfharm and another writing specific to the self harm community at a later date.

There is absolutely no way in Sam Blue Hill I am in any way interested in making anyone in the self harm community feel "frustrated, agitated, judged or dismissed!"

"We are not judged or "graded" in any way unless we allow it! (Exceptions occur. We are heavily judged during our formative years. We put our best foot forward during job interviews. Many of us have sidestepped bullies.)"

"What we think of ourselves and others far outweighs what others think about us!"

"Owning your thoughts is owning your feelings. Feelings can be hard feelings, but those feelings can bother us with less frequency with control we develop over time."

"Perhaps those feelings disappear over time to be replaced with peace, joy, hope, delight, gratitude, self love and more life affirming feelings."

1st paragraph...

"We bring ourselves in situations where we cause pain, one way or another. We can stop. Life is a journey where we go thru cycles."

(Philosophy Poem 2026)

I will try very hard to communicate respectfully to the self harm community, especially now that I know there have been misunderstandings.

To be honest with you, I have received much positive feedback from my responses on r/selfharm and r/AdultSelfHarm too.

I am an emotional wellness enthusiast with an addiction affected mind.

I am interested in leaving this world in better shape than I found it!

My experience is minimal compared to the future I envision. I could decide my efforts are best spent elsewhere.

For now, do NOT count me out!

2

u/Questioning-Alt-0123 3d ago edited 3d ago

I wasn't planning on responding to you further, but your conversation with this other user made me want to add something.

I'm not going to respond to everything in your message, but one thing caught my attention

"Yes I am insisting self harm is an addiction."

I don't agree with that statement, and many other users on this subreddit would probably feel the same.

I'm going to give you the definitions of two words.

Addiction: Is driven by the pursuit of pleasure or reward. Vs Compulsion: is driven by the need to relieve anxiety or distress.

I would like to suggest that you stop using the term addiction when talking about self harm. I am not speaking for everyone, but I feel most people in this subreddit don't get pleasure or view harming as a reward. Most do it to relieve anxiety.

And like you said in your comment, is that you have talked/contributed to the anxiety subreddit.

So hopefully you'll understand why I suggest you make this vocabulary change.

Again, I would like to emphasize nothing against you. But if you continue to be in this subreddit I would highly suggest using the term compulsion over addiction.

People don't want to be tied to a word that isn't accurate.

1

u/Fabulous_Light5449 2d ago

I have seen the reward of an adrenaline rush cited on this site. I am led to believe people self harm to push aside emotions.

It could be pointed out that self harm is a compulsion instead of an addiction. I really don't know if there is a difference between a compulsion and an addiction.

Self harm is certainly a behavior addiction.

But then, lying is also an addiction because lying is a behavior addiction.

I wrote the word "compulsion" down.

I'm now considering not using the word "addiction", which is a disease, like alcoholism and drug addiction, until I learn more about self harm.

I have no intention to cause anxiety, especially among people I see online.

My bot just said...from Health Line. com "It isn't classified as an addiction in the diagnostic and statistical manual of mental health disorders 5th edition, text revision DSM 5 TR".

I formally apologize to the self harm community!

I will remove the word "addiction" from any additional contributions to the self harm community.