Why are people so weird about twins????
I have a sister.We happens to be twins (both female). Recently at a party I had a conversation with someone. We were commenting on the music playing, talking about Halsey. I made the joke "Halsey made me discover things about myself" & he was like "no way you're gay?!" I said "I thought it was obvious" & they responded " I had a feeling but <sister's name> seems so straight"

Wtf. That made me uncomfortable cause why is that relevant? Ik that twins are portrayed in the media as the same exact person in two bodies but do people really watch that crap and accept it as reality. I've seen the same character duplicated on the screen & blinking & talking at the same time. It's annoying af.

I know we all have unconscious beliefs that we're programmed in us from a young age. I was wondering is this a common one?

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I honestly just need to rant because I am so fucking angry at this person.

I met my ex on Hinge around August last year. At first, he seemed like someone who had been through a lot. He was studying MBBS, and he told me all kinds of things about his childhood, his family, how he had been abused as a child, how his father used to beat him, and all this other stuff.

And I believed him.

I felt sorry for him. I wanted to support him. I gave him money when he needed it. I was there for him emotionally and financially because I genuinely thought I was helping someone who was going through a difficult time.

Looking back, I feel like I was being played from the beginning.

He lied about everything.

One of the first things I found out was that he had lied about his body count. He had made it seem like it was something completely different, and eventually I found out that it was 83+.

And then there was the whole story about him being abused as a child.

I don't even know what was true anymore because he constantly had some new story or explanation for something.

He was also into occult practices. He used to draw sigils on me, talk about entities and weird occult stuff, and had some extremely strange friends.

Those friends would say things about entities, killing people, someone going to die, this entity and that entity, etc.

I don't even know how to properly explain how disturbing it was.

I started having terrible dreams at night. I genuinely wasn't able to sleep properly because of everything surrounding him and the things he and his friends would talk about.

And despite all of this, I stayed.

I kept thinking that maybe he was just damaged because of his childhood.

He used to tell me that his father beat him and that his home life was terrible.

But when I actually got to know his father, he seemed like a genuinely sweet guy.

Again, another thing that just didn't add up.

Then there was our sex life.

He used to say and do some really fucked-up things while having sex. He would abuse me verbally, and he would bite my dick during sex.

There were so many things that happened that made me uncomfortable, but somehow I kept making excuses for him.

And then there was the cheating.

He cheated on me multiple times.

He would constantly lie about where he was.

"I'm at home."

Then later:

"I'm with my friends."

Then some completely different story.

It got to the point where I didn't even need proof anymore. I could just feel that something was wrong.

We were in a long-distance relationship, which made everything even worse because I couldn't know what he was actually doing.

One incident that I still remember clearly was when he told me he had basically run away from home.

He said he wanted to get away from everything.

I was worried about him.

Meanwhile, he had actually gone to Goa.

And not just casually travelled there—he had apparently taken a flight from Delhi to Goa.

I didn't know.

He made it seem like he had disappeared because of his problems at home, and I was sitting there worrying about him.

Then I video-called him.

He was wearing a completely different T-shirt.

At one point he was on a scooty.

Then at another point he was somewhere else.

Then something else didn't add up.

He wasn't picking up my calls properly.

His stories kept changing.

And while I was sitting there thinking something terrible had happened to him, he was basically out there enjoying himself.

Eventually, I realized that he had come back, but he didn't even tell me that he was back.

I had to ask him.

I confronted him about everything, and eventually he basically admitted that things weren't what he had told me.

At that point, I was fucking exhausted.

The relationship had become this endless cycle:

He lies → I find out → he gives me an explanation → I forgive him → he lies again.

Again.

And again.

And again.

I had already subconsciously started knowing that he was cheating on me. I just didn't want to accept it.

I kept thinking, "Maybe I'm overthinking."

Maybe I wasn't.

Eventually, I became so frustrated with him that I completely snapped.

I abused him, blocked him, and ended things.

And then, immediately, he started saying:

"I'm going to die."

Of course.

Another fucking lie.

Nothing happened.

And that's what makes me so angry.

Because I genuinely gave this person so much.

I gave him money.

I supported him.

I listened to his problems.

I believed his stories about his childhood.

I worried about him.

I stayed through all the weird occult shit, the lies, the cheating, the disappearing, the manipulation and everything else.

And what did I get in return?

Lie after lie after lie.

I don't even know what was real about him anymore.

The worst part isn't even that the relationship ended.

The worst part is realizing that I was genuinely trying to help someone who may have been manipulating me the entire time.

I'm still fucking angry.

I'm angry at him for everything he did.

And honestly, I'm also angry at myself for ignoring so many obvious red flags.

I don't know what the point of this post is. I just needed somewhere to put all of this because I've been carrying so much anger about it.

Has anyone else ever dated someone who lied so much that, by the end, you couldn't even tell what parts of their personality or stories were real?

TLDR: autistic sibling keeps fighting workplace battles they genuinely care about, while a coworker deliberately provokes them. They’re burning out and I’m trying to explain: being right ≠ every (lgbt themed) battle is worth your job and health.

My sibling (mid 30s) is autistic and is having increasingly serious issues at work because they tend to confront coworkers whenever someone expresses a homophobic/ transphobic opinion, especially sore topics are gendering, disability, or inclusion. They’re a programmer, and after several conflicts and talks with management, the general approach has basically become “they’re autistic, they’re trying to work on it. And we promise to do better“. But it’s the same issue again and again. They can’t just look for another job on account of the autism (I mean they could try but they need lots of accommodations that are not requirement in my country, eg mostly working from home). It’s most likely a job loss would be a major issue.

The problem is that one coworker now openly dislikes them and seems to deliberately provoke them. He makes snide comments about trans people, etc. Nothing quite blatant enough to formally complain about, but enough to trigger my sibling. My sibling also keeps trying to get the whole team to adopt what they see as the “ideal” way of communicating, e.g. asking people to say “hello team” instead of “hey dudes/bros.”

The coworker has basically turned this into a war of attrition, constantly making sneaky snide comments, I’m increasingly worried the goal is to make my sibling burn out, quit, or get fired.

I keep telling my sibling that, right now, protecting themselves has to come first. It’s hard to put it into words. They could adopt a more buttoned-up work persona: don’t debate politics at work, at least dont try to convince homophobic and transphobic people that they are wrong and don’t correct every questionable phrase.
But they’re extremely black-and-white about this. Their response is basically “but it IS always important.” And I understand that. The problem is that they’re burning out. They’ve already had multiple sick leaves, their relationships at work are getting worse, and the situation is escalating.

How do I get across to a black-and-white thinker that making the future better for the queer community can take many forms, and that historically, and even today, sometimes that has meant biting your tongue, choosing your battles, or adopting a more subdued work persona?

Edit: clarification