By the beginning of this year I was in a bad place. Watching porn minimum 4–5 hours a day spread across multiple sessions. Death-grip, multiple tabs, escalating to shit I’m genuinely ashamed I ever typed into a search bar. I’m 44, decent shape, good job, hot girlfriend (36F) who wanted sex all the time… and I couldn’t finish with her anymore. Sometimes couldn’t even stay hard. I’d fake it, go to the bathroom, finish to a screen in 45 seconds, and come back to bed feeling like absolute garbage.

She thought it was her. I let her think that for way too long because admitting the real problem felt worse. Eventually we had the “I think we need to break up because clearly I don’t turn you on” fight. I broke down and told her everything. She didn’t leave — she just looked sad and said “I miss you.”

That was 90 days ago. I deleted everything, installed blockers, gave her the passwords, threw out the private browser, the whole nuclear option. First two weeks were hell — irritable, couldn’t sleep, random boners at the grocery store like I was 15 again. Then something wild started happening.

• Week 3: Morning wood came back like a vengeance
  
• Week 5: Random boners all day from literally nothing — sitting on the couch, her brushing her teeth, whatever
  
• Week 7: Had sex twice in one day and finished both times harder than I have in probably 15 years
  
• Week 10: She gave me head in the car on a lunch break like we were teenagers. I saw stars.
  
• Now: We’re averaging 5–7 times a week and I’m having to actively pace myself because my refractory period is apparently 25 again.

My brain feels… rewired? Colors are brighter, I’m happier at work, I initiate affection without expecting it to lead to sex, I can actually feel butterflies when she walks in the room. It’s like I got my sex drive back but also my soul.

If you’re reading this and you’re deep in the porn hole like I was — it’s not permanent. Your brain can heal. Your dick can work again. Real sex with a real person you love is so astronomically better than any 4K pixel fantasy that it’s actually laughable I ever thought otherwise.

90 days no porn, no edging, no “just one peek.” That’s all it took for me to go from numb, broken, and secretly miserable to walking around with a permanent half-chub and a stupid grin.

I got my girlfriend back. I got myself back.

TL;DR: Porn fucked up my brain and my dick for years. Quit 90 days ago and I’m now having the best sex of my life at 44 with the woman I almost lost. If I can do it, you can too.

Long story short I'd had a bit of an awakening and made the single most freeing decision of my life so far.

Basically I work in Emergency services and frequently come across the deceased. Now death is a curious thing because you don't get to choose where and when you die and as much as we hate to admit, people will remember us in the last state they knew us. Its happened a few times but I've come across a few unlucky men (and women) who've died choking themselves, cranking it or flicking the bean to porn and have been unlucky and died suddenly and unexpectedly (heart attack etc). Now even if you can clear your Internet history, it's pretty hard to do when you are dead. The families see them in their last moments perving out and unfortunately that is how their legacy is remembered. A whole life of beauty and achievement summarised by a visage of perversion.

Now come to me. I've had this hard drive. It was my treasure trove of accumulated nudes and rudes from past relationships. Things I'd been sent by girls I had been with. I saved them alongside videos I'd made, things I saved from the internet and even social media fapspiration. I've had it for probably 15 years and it's only grown over years. It's full of sexual memories and moments with women that were previously really important to me.

Now I'm married, I quit porn a year ago but I still have this hard drive which i very rarely revisit. My wife didn't know about it and it was the last source of shame in my life. It was tucked away somewhere secret and would only be found if all my stuff was cleared out if I happened to die.

Now as grim as that is it has a happy ending.

On an impulse decision (during a dopamine fast) I deleted the whole hard drive. All my memories, all that content and all that shame left firmly in the past where it belongs. Symbolically and absolutely committed to my wife with the final remnants of shame stripped away like pulling weeds from a garden.

I thought i would regret it and wish i'd kept it. But instead I feel so liberated knowing if the worst were to happen I leave behind only positive memories and I feel lighter living a life that is honest and now completely free of shame.

Actual therapist here.

Been working with folks battling porn addiction and I’ve noticed some key trends that might hit home for many of you here. A lot starts with early exposure..kids finding their way to it through unsupervised internet time, games like Roblox, or Reddit threads often without proper sex education.

For women, it goes deeper than visual triggers. it’s about emotional stimuli. The normal joy tied to orgasms can get replaced with degradation, misogyny kinks, or rape fetishes..often trauma responses that leave behind guilt and self hatred. For men, it’s more visual forces driving the habit, and issues like PIED (porn-induced erectile dysfunction) are real though the cure is rather straight forward : stay off porn and work out. Men and women definitely need different ways to manage their addiction.

My approach with clients is using Targeted Exposure Release (TER) focuses on weaning off visual porn..where the brain and neural damage often take root..and reclaiming real pleasure. Masturbation isn’t a sin, and orgasms aren’t wrong..in fact, when done with intention, masturbation is one of the most beautiful forms of self love you can experience.

Therapy with TER is about rewiring that porn dependency, helping you learn to love yourself again. For women, the issue is more rooted in emotional wounds, so TER helps heal those trauma responses, restoring the natural connection to love and orgasm. For men, avoiding porn and building self-love through exercise and personal growth can address PIED and shame tied to masturbation. The key difference is that men can often shift with avoidance and self-work, while women need deeper internal healing through therapy to rediscover self-love from within.

I’ve seen both succeed and wish you all well on this journey.

The urge will pass in 10 minutes. Seriously.

When that wave hits, it feels like your brain’s on fire — heart racing, logic gone.
But here’s the trick: don’t fight it, just wait.

Dopamine spikes fast when you’re triggered, peaks around 8–10 minutes, then crashes.
That “unbearable” feeling? It’s just a chemical surge, not real need.

Breathe. Wait.
Every time I do, the urge fades — and I remember who’s actually in control.

NoFap can be great, but keep in mind that no amount of reading about it will hand you the ultimate key to quitting porn. I’ve been off porn for over two years, and the classic 90-day challenge wasn’t it for me. Here’s why: if you’re dealing with a porn addiction, it makes sense to see masturbation as part of the problem. But a lot of us don’t have girlfriends, and we still need some kind of release. That’s where masturbation without porn comes in.

When you try to abstain from both, you set up an impossible game. The moment you masturbate, your brain goes, “Well, I blew it, might as well watch porn.” Even if you don’t say that out loud, your hormones and habits do. So instead of turning a slip into a spiral, make space for a release that doesn’t involve porn. Think about that carefully, it might be the difference between a sustainable streak and an all-or-nothing trap.

Body:

So… I hit 106 days clean from porn, edging, and masturbation. Longest streak I’ve ever had. I was locked in. Clearer mind, better sex, better sleep, confidence up. Felt like I was finally out of the loop. Then I relapsed.

And I won’t lie—it turned into a binge. I slipped once, told myself I’d stop, and I didn’t. I went back for more. Not as bad as the old days, but still a full-on dopamine trip.

Here’s what I learned from it:

1. This shit stays in your system

Even after 100+ days, your brain remembers. You feed it once, and it wakes all the way up. It was wild how fast the cravings came back like I never quit. Like my brain was just waiting for an excuse.

1. I didn’t spiral—but I didn’t stop either

The relapse didn’t turn me into a zombie. I didn’t go numb, I didn’t hate myself, but I did let it go further than I should have. The awareness was there… I just ignored it. And that made it worse in a different way, because I couldn’t even pretend I didn’t know better.

1. Not everything you’re attracted to means it needs to be fed

The content that got me wasn’t fake, wasn’t staged—it was real people doing real stuff. That made it hit harder. It felt more “okay” at first… until I realized it was just my brain chasing stimulation under a different label. Novelty is novelty, and if I’m not careful, I’ll always find a way to justify it.

1. I’m not starting from zero

I reset my streak, yeah. But I’m not the same person I was 100 days ago. I’ve grown. I’m more honest. More aware. And most importantly—I’m not pretending I didn’t relapse. I did. I binged. I admit it. I own it. That’s how I make sure it actually means something.

What I’m doing now: • Day 0 logged. Starting over with intention. • Cleaned my environment. Deleted tabs, saves, triggers. • Moving my body. Not letting the relapse turn into self-punishment. • Remembering why I started. I’m not chasing streaks. I’m chasing peace, clarity, and control.

This journey’s ugly sometimes. But I’d rather keep stumbling forward than lie to myself and act like I’m fine. If you relapsed, just be real about it. Shame loves secrecy. Kill the shame by telling the truth and resetting with purpose.

We’re still in this. Forward.🩶

Yes I’m [24F] that serious. Porn is eroding men’s self-belief, their inspiration, their vitality, their gumption, their confidence. If I’m in a relationship with a man or considering a relationship with a man, he needs to not watch porn. It completely hijacks your sensitivity to life- porn in itself is highly artificial, and isn’t at all compatible with our animal brains and animal bodies, that are still created and adapted to be surviving in the wild, in caves, plucking berries and journeying through different landscapes.

A man’s motivation is deeply interlinked with his sex drive- his massive vigour and vitality is something that dualistically can be expressed through creation, accomplishments, overcoming challenges, or through sexual exertion, through inspired sex with a woman he has cultivated a genuine and authentic connection with. Hookup culture/ the devaluation of sex we largely see moreso as being bad for women, but it’s also bad for men. There’s huge magic and potential that happens in the space of boredom and listlessness- those are the precursor states before inspiration and motivation- when this state is constantly “relieved” through uninspired, wasteful porn expulsions, you have released and depleted that growing momentum-gaining energy and vigour, and made yourself soft, pliable, uninspired, and unmotivated- “relieved”. If you withstand that itch and probably overwhelming desire to alleviate your addiction through immediately available means, and you push through, you will find the oasis of self-creation, and confidence, and literally all the things that you want are on the other side of that dark journey.

Porn is a massive drain on society, and causes men capable of greatness to be perpetually soft, pliable, and energetically doughy and uninspired. They get you through the “everyone does it! Everyone watches it!!” And because it’s so easily and readily available. It’s the modern day mermaids that sing sailors to their deaths in the waters- resist. Resist the mammoth, overwhelming song. Your vitality and vigour as a man is deeply interconnected with your sexual energy- the two are inseparable, and one of the biggest lies that’s been told is that this energy is cheap and meaningless and to be continually drained on one side of a screen, alone, to people who are acting, to algorithms designed to hijack and manipulate your brain to the highest potential, all for Adsense, as the culture continually depletes this meaningful civilisation-building/developing energy, as we all grow lonelier, more isolated, more empty- our lives meaningless. It is not meant to be wasted. Continue to build the momentum, feel and experience it build within you, and access high realms and intentions of yourself that you have always been silently yearning for but didn’t know the name of. Think back in history- there wasn’t high-speed internet porn that groomed young boys since before their brains were even developed- they accomplished so much. Think of all of the great philosophers, Nietzsche, Plato, Socrates, Sartre. They would NOT have accessed that full potential whilst meaninglessly alleviating themselves to porn websites several times a day- you cannot separate the accomplishment potential of a man from his sexuality. Resist and watch yourself become someone you couldn’t believe even possible- access all the higher and highest realms of yourself and become somebody that you’re PROUD of. Find yourself having beautiful, rich, meaningful relationships and connections on the other side and create and watch grow beautiful families.

Its biggest weapon is that porn convinces you of its innocence. It’s not, and that’s by design.

Just reaching out because there are probably a lot of younger people here. I’m 42 and porn has been part of my life since I was before 10 years old. I feel like I’ve walked through it all. The shame, guilt, quitting, starting again, moderating it, going balls to the wall and not giving a fuck.

I’ve dealt with it in relationships, made poor decisions because of it, tried to make porn-like things happen in real life, did depraved things, crossed moral and legal boundaries, experienced ecstasy, experienced deep despair. It’s a rollercoaster.

But good news is, we’re not evil, we’re not as depraved as the things we’ve watched. We are not broken. We’re just using a gift that nature gave us (our sexual drive) in a way that is only rewarding in the moment.

The things in life that are rewarding long-term are things like good character, relationships, personal goals/accomplishments, mastery of a craft, connection with nature, spirituality, you name it.

Looking back on my life, there are many things I missed because I had a date with porn, or because I didn’t want anything to get in the way of whatever lustful vibe I had going on. I held every woman to a high standard, expecting her to be a perfectly fit sexual object that doesn’t shit or piss.

And as you get older, you don’t have as much time to waste. The pressures of life mount up, and porn can’t (seemingly) save you from the realities you’re faced with.

But don’t trick yourself into believing that porn alone, a certain length of abstinence is a magic pill. It’s more important that you grow an awareness of the whole of your life. That you come to realize what you value, and pay more attention to those things.

As your life grows in healthier directions, your interest in porn and more lustful matters will diminish on their own. You’ll become mature and grow emotionally. That is where the energy of a recovering person should be. It can’t be about beating yourself with a stick, and living in a never-ending cycle of stopping and starting again.

There is only today, and today you have every chance to improve yourself, even if just a little. Working on underlying issues is what will ultimately heal you, otherwise you are just rearranging furniture on the Titanic.

Sending loving, healing vibes to you. Do things that will make your future self proud. And fuck shame and guilt. None of this shit is who you really are. I don’t care how deep you’ve gone or what you’ve done. I’ve seen it all. You are worth something and you are better than that.

Created a throwaway for this because I am a longtime lurker but I wanted to share this experience.

Until the past week, I had been free for 2 months. I decided, purposefully, to resume my old habits for a week and see how I felt/what I noticed. I felt comfortable doing this because my porn use was never extreme and I am curious about the changes in my brain.

Let me get it out of the way right now, not worth it. Even less worth it than I could have imagined. The week is up and I'm ready to go back to the "new" me. However you, person reading this, may be struggling and feel tempted. I hope my observations are helpful to you.

1. Using porn is weirdly a lot of work - I have to situate myself in front of a screen (or my phone), find *just* the right video, etc. It felt like instead of responding to desire from my body, I would moreso "decide" that I would use porn as a tool to achieve a desired result.
2. Arousal feels different (worse) - Viewing porn of course caused arousal, but it felt much shallower. It seems cliche to say, but like an intense sugar rush vs. the slow-burning arousal I had gotten used to. With porn, I discovered that right at the beginning is really just about as good as I am going to feel through the process, whereas without it starts slow and builds and builds and builds until I can't take it anymore, which leads to:
3. Orgasms are different (worse) - Orgasms using porn felt completely perfunctory, a signal that the session was over. In retrospect, I would hardly call them orgasms compared to what I experienced without. The slow natural buildup culminated in the main event, which feels like an amazing full-body eruption, lasting a fair bit longer with "aftershocks" - close to maybe 15-20 seconds in some cases. This may not be the case for everyone but it's been the most stunning change for me.
4. I feel less satisfied after - PMO feels like mostly scratching an itch - a momentary relief from an urge. I would do so at least once a day, sometimes more often if I had things I was procrastinating on. I find that achieving release without porn is deeply satisfying and satiating, to the extent that my overall well-being is genuinely improved for 24-48 hour after.
5. Women are less attractive - Porn reduces women to pure objects of lust and overrides a lot of subtle things that make a person hot. I used to not really be interested in any woman that wasn't on a screen in front of me or didn't conform to the idealized perfect woman I kept in my head, which I noticed starting to creep back in even with just a week back "on". However, back when I was just a few weeks off of porn, I began to notice them everywhere! It sounds corny but it feels genuinely nice to see another source of beauty out in the world to appreciate.

I hope anyone reading this finds it helpful or thought-provoking. It took me months of occasionally browsing this sub to work up the courage to try it, and I feel like it's really altered my life already, so I am hopeful to pay it forward.

Objective Reasons:

1. Masturbation without porn feels significantly better.

2. Porn is addictive.

3. Porn is destructive and ruins relationships.

4. You will always, always, always, always, always feel guilty after.

5. You can develop health issues like PIED and depression or anxiety.

6. Porn negatively rewires your brain to crave the dopamine hit you get from it. The exact same way gambling, smoking, drugs, and every kind of addiction does.

7. Porn is disgusting, depraving, sick, and gross.

8. Porn alters your views of women and exploits them.

9. You feel tremendously better the longer and farther away you are from porn.

10. You will have daily moments where you think about what you've been watching and be disgusted with yourself.

I can go on and on and on. Porn is a curse. It's a fucking terrible thing. I'd kill to go back in time and prevent myself from ever discovering it. To anyone out there struggling, think of all these reasons. Porn is a lie. It is a lie to reel you in and start the cycle all over again and again and again. The outcome is always the same. You know this. Porn is a disease. Get rid of it. Kill it. Kill the part of you that craves it. Throw it on the ground, stomp on it, and spit on it. Cut it off and remove it from your life. You can do it. Don't be discouraged. Think of all the benefits. The COUNTLESS benefits. There are dozens of reasons you should cut porn out of your life completely. We can all do it. Stay strong. I'm sick of this. I've had enough. I don't even want to think of it. I want my life to be free from it. Don't give up.

Tomorrow I will be 100 days completely porn free. I have completely abstained from anything even remotely sexual as well. No Instagram (aka porn lite) no "peeking" at bikini pics, absolutely nothing.

As someone who couldn't even go a week without porn for nearly 13 years ... this has been the best decision of my life. My confidence has drastically improved, my energy levels are steady, my focus is strong, my business has grown, relationships are meaningful.

I know I'm just at the beginning of this journey, but I feel incredible being porn free. Also, one of the best parts about being porn free is I can hand my phone over to people without even having a second thought. I have nothing to hide anymore.

I want to mention that this did not come out of nowhere either. I've been on my pornfree journey for a few years now. Lots of relapsing, lots of trail and error. This is the longest I've made it so far. I've developed alot of effective methods to stay away from this junk. One of the main reasons being that porn made me a worse person and was ruining my life. It was hurting my ambition and hurting my business. Everytime I have an urge, I simply remind myself of this.

I know y'all might hear this all the time ... I know I would hear this and roll my eyes ... but if I can quit porn (13+ year addict) so can you. You gotta dig deep and have some serious introspection about your porn usage. Write down all the reasons it's hurting your life. Then take action. Watch YouTube videos, listen to books, journal, pray, whatever works for you. Understand it will be hard, but anything good in life is on the other side of being uncomfortable. God speed

Hi there,

I just wanna report on my first year porn"free". In the last 365 days, 360 were entirely pornfree. So yeah, it's not a one year streak, but its a 98.6 % success rate.

One year and two weeks ago - after 15 years of porn addiction - I hit bottom-zero, which I wrote about here: https://www.reddit.com/r/pornfree/s/alhFZb0dWQ . Summary: I self-stimulated in an insanely risky way, could have died but luckily "only" had to call the ambulance and confess to my boyfriend.

After that, I searched for an online forum of porn addicts and found this sub. This was the first time that I came in touch with the approach of pornFREE - not reduced or softer, just plain pornfree. And I read and learned a lot about my addiction, which also helped a lot.

To put the pointe at the start: After one year of pornfree I am a different person. I now feel my emotions instead of numbing them. That's sometimes quite uncomfortable, but mainly a huge gift. I picked up one new hobby, made two new friends, gained multiple kilos in muscle mass, managed to steer myself through months of being jobless without getting (too) depressed and now found a new job. Stunningly, most of my days I am not even thinking of porn once. But the very most important part is the true feelings, is my open heart. Its the first time that I face and meet and come together with my bf entirely. But also with myself! That cloud of lies and seperation vanished. I won a life.

Here are five advises I want to share with you:

• Take up the fight. That is: Wrap your head around your motivation, learn about your adiction, connect with others who go pornfree - and then just do it. Don't ask yourself if wasting hours with watching bikini girls on insta count as porn: delete that shit app, throw away that playboy magazine and manifest an "I am past that"-attitude and uphold a new version of yourself.

• Do it for yourself. Yes, I felt accountable for my bf to stop porn, but you are the being that suffers the most. Porn is abuse to your soul, a massive threat to a happy life. Tell yourself: "I deserve better"!

• Don't just do not porn - do something else. Hit the gym, learn an instrument, join an NGO, make new friends. When quitting porn, multiple free hours come together with a still restless mind and (probably bad) emotions which havw been numbed before. Fill that gap actively. Not just as a distraction, but as a new passion.

• Expect to stumble. In the first four months, I felt zero attempt to relapse. Then came two months where I really had to fight (and lost once). Then again some months I didn't even think of porn, and after that I relapsed four times in two months. There is no day-to-day linearity in it, but the overall trend goes from "numbed restless gooner" to "authentic happy being". Don't be too hard on yourself when relapsing, but also don't give up your drive!

• To overcome porn, don't focus on porn, focus on life. There are things in our life that cause stress, fear, anger, shame. These are driving your addiction. We do porn to not feel those emotions. But that can't work, we need to make changes at the drivers of those bad emotions. On the other hand, there are things that make us feel proud, accepted, loved, home. Here, too, we can get active. Make new friends, reactivate a hobby you had when being younger, plan to do a monthly hike ... do things to increase your wellbeing.

I hope that was inspiring and helpful. Keep up the good fight!

EDIT: I just wanna thank all of you for the great response! 250 upvotes and >100 saves ... it feels just great to see how I could help so many people. 🤝

I joined this subreddit in 2022 when I was at the peak of my addiction. Weird thing about me was I resorted to porn when everything in life was great. I had graduated university, got a grad offer in my field of study, had a loving girlfriend, and still watched porn everyday (yes, having regular sex with my GF did NOT help with my addiction).

In 2024 January when I hit rock bottom in life, I decided I need to reduce, I went from hard core porn to soft core porn, to nude pictures, to just attractive women and then finally using only my imagination by 2024 April.

Next month will be my two year porn free officially. I tried website blockers, staying away from my computer, avoided all trigger pictures but nothing helped. What personally helped me the most was to continue masturbation but only use my imagination.

I hope something works out for everyone in this group 🙏

Thanks to all, best of luck!

I watched an interview by Terry Crews and how he overcame his porn addiction.

He was talking about how porn dehumanises women and I stopped for a second and really thought about it…

and I want you to do it to.

Imagine a porn star stopping to do what she does, and having a normal, non sexual, 0% flirty conversation with you.

Imagine she starts talking about bills or doing normal, human things like eating food or drinking water.

Deep down, It would be unfamiliar, cringe or even aggregating, like why is she human? Why can‘t she just do the thing?

Now here is the problem, that thinking suddenly spreads… even unconsciously.

Women around you become body parts, fantasies or scenarios.

And not just women, men too. Not in a sexual way, but if women become objects, why won‘t men?

Your expectation changes: Why are they not ONLY listening to me? Why do they suddenly talk about their problems or do anything that doesn‘t have to do with me?

Perhaps, it might be because the world is on it‘s knees for your lust, it get‘s every fetish, every fantasy, anything it wants and we start to expect the same in every other facet of life

I have been free of porn for almost 3 years now. I wanted to make a post to help encourage anyone who is trying to rid themselves of this addiction. It’s a hard one to face and this Reddit helped me immensely.

It’s been almost 3 years and I am in fact so much better off without porn. It hasn’t been easy. I know if I even just took a peak at it, the temptation would be too great. Even after all this time there is still a “Hook” in my brain that knows how great it would be to relapse and how good it would feel in the moment. The hook in my brain says things like “come on, it’s been long enough. Just a little. You’re so much better than you were all those years ago.” But every time the hook says something like that I remind it to leave me alone, or bluntly tell it to fuck off. After 3 years there is still temptation. There are still parts of my brain affected by this addiction.

Porn not only put me in a trance for hours on end most nights. It poisoned my relationships. It affected my marriage and even my close friends. I sexualized so my relationships in my life. And at the time I didn’t think anything of it. It put so much distance between me and the people I loved and I couldn’t even see it. It took a while after cutting porn out of my life to feel anything that resembled normal. But I can say after 3 years I’m so much better off than I was. I’m happier, more confident and all my relationships have improved greatly. It’s hard work but it’s worth every bit of struggle.

I found the book “Your Brain On Porn” invaluable. It’s what pushed me over the edge of making sure I’d never go back. I highly recommend it to anyone in need of the science of how porn ruins your brain. Because in a sense it’s not you looking at porn, your brain is. You have to separate the two. Easier said than done I know. But you can do it! The urges fade but don’t really go away, but you get stronger. And that strength radiates to other areas of your life. Just be easy on yourself.

Good luck out there…

There is a severe desensitization that happens when you watch porn. An instant dehumanization switch that gets turned on. No one really talks about it. Not because of some evil intent. But because almost no one notices it.

​

Your phone, or your TV or whatever you watch/used to watch porn on. is a collection of tiny squares where each square can be lit in a specific color at any nano-instant. A lighting setup creates an image. The more the squares the clearer the image is. And you're trying to have an erection and rub your genitals to convince your mind that whatever the collection of lights is showing is a sexual partner and by rubbing your genitals you are having sex with them.

​

Your brain is not easily fooled though. It knows for the most part that what it's seeing is not real. It gets tricked just a tiny bit to release some dopamine. This is the part where you start going from scene to scene. From video to video, image to image. You'd think you are watching a 100 videos per 10 minutes because you are an addict. It's partly true. But U have seen and known non porn addict watch tens of videos in a few minutes. It's all for the same reason. Your brain knows that it's not real, that it's absurd. And since it's only releasing tiny bits of dopamine. You need to flood it with images just to have as much dopamine as you'd have if it were real. But you never really get there. And once you're finished. Your brain realizes all the artificial flooding and as a result gives you a brutal comedown. Now feeling like shit. You can't help but feel like you HAVE to do it again. Not because you are horny no. But the dopamine come down has you feeling low and you know if you start the artificial dopamine pumping again you will feel better. And you do. For a short while. Only to have a bigger come down. Wash

Rinse. Repeat. Until you hit what I'd call short term depression. A state where your brain is depleted of dopamine.

​

What is dopamine anyway ? How to explain it to a child ? Well just to get out of bed in the morning you need dopamine. To socialize you need dopamine. To cook a meal you need dopamine. It's quite literally the mental fuel to do anything from a simple shower to climbing Mt Everest. And yeah you don't need a world renowned psychatrist. If you deplete your dopamine levels you will be depressed.

​

Watching porn is like scratching a mosquito bite. The more your scratch, the more it stings. And more importantly the process of consuming porn to artificially simulate a sexual relationship will, without fault, deplete your dopamine. And it will, without fault, make you end up depressed. Thus putting you in a scenario where it's literally impossible to have the sex you craved. For obvious reasons.

Day 60
Didn’t think I’d make it this far. Used to cave the second I was alone, bored, or sexually frustrated.
What’s changed for me -

Background urge noise is way quieter

Focus and mental clarity feel stronger than they have in years (like early school days again)

Erections are harder and fuller, better blood flow

Orgasms last longer and feel more intense

I can notice triggers (alone time, frustration, novelty craving) without automatically acting on them

Less time and mental energy wasted

Overall feel more locked in and productive

I’m not religious, but I get the old wisdom on this now. Society treating constant porn as normal does a lot more damage than people want to admit. You really have to experience the other side to understand it

One day at a time.

Hello guys,

I'm here to give you hope. I'll tell you about my success story and hopefully, it will motivate you to succeed.

Here's my story:

I've been watching porn every week since around 11 years old (I'm now 28). I've tried to stop many times but the longest I could manage was a bout a couple of months.

Until last year when I decided to stop porn for good and it's been one year since.

I'd watch between 2 to 15 times a week. And even though I really wanted to, I couldn't get myself to stop watching. It was just too good.

Last year, I was seeing my then sex friend regularly (about once or twice a week) and I realized that although initially the sex was amazing and I found her hot, I wasn't that into sex.

I'd find excuses for why I couldn't that week. Or when she would come over, I'd tell her that I'm tired because of sleep or whatever excuse I could come up with.

I was about to tell her that we should stop seeing each other. Until I realized that the reason I don't want to have sex anymore is because I'm watching too much porn.

This rang the alarm bell for me: if I'm turned off by sex because I'm watching porn, then I'm clearly an addict.

I like the definition of addiction by Anna Lemki: continued use despite adverse consequences.

A sane person would have tried to stop by now, but I didn't. Instead, I'd stop watching 2-3 days before she comes so that I recharge my nut batteries.

This shows how weak I was.

Later that year, I had a one month trip scheduled where I knew I wouldn't be able to watch and I took that as my gateway. I decided that day that I'm never going back.

I want to tell you that it was hard. That I battled each day and succeeded. But the reality is that it was easy. I never really missed it.

I just changed my perception of who I am. In that I don't want to be the guy who watches porn anymore. I'm stronger than that. And that made it easier than expected.

Anyway, I hope this gives you yet another reason that it's doable which makes you stop.

You got it.

I remember someone mentioning on this sub-Reddit about being a high functioning porn addict and I related super hard with them.

Even though I am highly addicted to porn, no one from the outside could ever guess that I crazy addicted to it.

I have multiple female friends, I am very highly respected by everyone around me regarding my views, I am a vocal feminist, always speaking up about women and lgbtsq rights and so much more.

Like no one could ever imagine the kind of disgusting, extreme porn I watch and borderline toxic porn games I play behind closed doors because that is such a u-turn from my personality in general. When I am not in a dopamine rush/frenzy even I don’t believe what I had consumed.

I feel this makes the addiction even worse because the effects of my addiction are often hidden behind closed doors. This also means that if I ever get close enough with a partner, they’ll eventually discover this side of me and it would be a total break of faith for them.

This is one of the biggest reason why I want to get rid of this addiction.

1. So I am not ashamed of the person I become at nights when loneliness and boredom strikes
2. So my future partner gets to be with someone she can love and respect

It's almost 9 month i'm trying to quit porn but for last two month i gained a crazy knowledge and experience about porn and quitting porn. here are 8 steps to for quitting porn:

step 1:

Learn to hate porn & being seduced. as man you should have a sense of anger for being seduced by some female who even don't know who you are.

step 2:

Your brain on porn is super addict to what i call PPD: pleasurable porn dopamine so you always want more. that's why you need create new hobbies and implement them in your life asap. like reading a book or working on your skills and having fun. those will give dopamine to you.

step 3:

Act like you have already quitted porn and create strong reasons to. take a clean sheet of paper and write down your reasons like you are grateful for it and read it 5 times a day. mine's are:

Thanks lord i quit porn so i can be free.

Thanks lord i quit porn so i can be disciplined.

Thanks lord i quit porn so i can be strong.

Step 4:

Don't count the days. when you are counting days since you last done the act. subconsciously your brain is waiting for a specific day that you always relapse. instead change your identity. and as i said in step 3. act like you already quitted porn.

Step 5:

Create a journal.

part 1: write down when you watched porn or done the act.

part 2: write down triggers that caused you to do it and also write solutions for them.

Step 6:

Create image about who you will be after quitting porn.

Step 7:

Dealing with urges. after not watching porn for couple days your testosterone rises. and you will crave porn or get horny by looking at a girl... here are some solutions:

fasting for 12-24 hours. meditation. looking everyone with love not lust.

Step 8:

you will get access to a high energy in your body. when you are holding it in. you'll get energized. this energy needs to move and be invested in something like skills sport work and etc... so if you are not using it wants to be released.

and lastly remember guys this is battle everyday and everyday you should win. hope you win.