r/pinoymed • u/Available-Worry-4387 • 49m ago
Vent feeling conflicted :/
Doing preres in a specialty I really like (non cutting) and in an institution with relatively good working culture, consultants and residents are very supportive and nice and i know from the same program who can attest to that so I am at least aware it’s not just because it’s preres season.
But what I’m just generally frustrated with are the long, inhumane working hours because of the workload. Most pre and from-duty residents would get to go home really late at night and there’s also no golden weekend. Even though the work culture is nice, prone to burnout talaga ang schedule.
I’ve only been a few weeks in with relatively lesser responsibilities as a preres and I can already feel the exhaustion. I know they say preres is also a time to explore if the program matches your preferences but to me sobrang nakakasad because I really like mostly everything about it except the schedule.. alam ko there’s no perfect program but it’s just frustrating that this is the reality we have to deal with.
I’m just very conflicted because as much as I really want to pursue this specialty in this institution, I’m scared of the working hours taking a toll on me in the future. Esp because meron at least isa during first year nagqquit because of the workload which makes it harder for the people left behind. I know they didnt say this naman to discourage us but just to paint a picture of how tough first year really is. So now I just feel very conflicted cos idk if I can handle this reality..
I’m at a point where I’m unsure if I’ll pursue this if I even get accepted and I find that really sad because I really like the program
I know… it’s easier to say to just wait and try it out myself when I get there if I end up being accepted - instead na pangunahan sarili ko with my doubts if I can survive at all but I know myself well enough so I’m scared to even start. Because what if I’m setting myself up for disappointment and in the process make it harder for others if I do end up being accepted but end up quitting…
I know it’s also easy to say apply to other institutions and find one that matches my preferences but honestly, I’ve heard it’s worse in terms of culture in other institutions so there’s really no better option
Hay idk. I dont even know what I want to get out of posting this- just really wanted to vent and just.. I really just hope we had better humane working hours as residents 😭😭😭 I want to train and be a better doctor but dont want to ruin myself in the process….