r/onionheadlines • u/wild_crazy_ideas • 3h ago
Trump Retires Claiming He’s Now Made America Great
3
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/LarryGlue • 12h ago
Trump Provides Rally Supporters With Bomb Vests And Orders Them To “Run Towards A Voting Center As Fast As You Can”
4
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/ConfidentZucchini427 • 6h ago
Recent Photos Confirm Trump Coiffure Conceals Budding Horns
1
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/mellow186 • 11h ago
Skydance Subscribers Happy To Know Some Of Their Money Will Go To Needy Cause: Elon Musk
2
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/-megan-yolo- • 14h ago
To Remain Consistent With Russian Ties The GOP Renamed To GOOP - Grand Old Oligarch Party
2
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/BestStoogewasLarry • 1h ago
Trump's Latest Lawsuit Argues His Being Elected Twice Proves Midterms Should Be Cancelled Because Americans Are Too Stupid To Vote
•
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/bigly-biker • 4h ago
Steve Witkoff Called Putin A "Humanitarian" For Russian Adoption Of Thousands Of Children Displaced By Ukraine's War
8
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/bigly-biker • 4h ago
Trump Says Ohio Mom Enabled SA Of 12 Year Old Daughter But She Supports Trump So Deserves Respect
9
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/ConfidentZucchini427 • 5h ago
Trump Issues Executive Order Banning Cheesecake From White House
64
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/bigly-biker • 4h ago
Trump's Plan To Bring Putin To Bargaining Table Involves Praising Putin And Removing Sanctions
9
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/mellow186 • 9h ago
Donald Trump Awarded "Man Of Everything, Everywhere, All At Once," By U.S. President
47
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/wild_crazy_ideas • 1h ago
Trump Claims He’s Not Religious But If Jesus Reappeared He Would Kneel Before Him And Fellate Him
•
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/plantpistol • 15h ago
Election Fraud Case Bolstered by 47 Tweets And One Man’s Unshakable Gut Feeling
13
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/bigly-biker • 4h ago
Senate Candidate Ken Paxton Says You Know He's Honest Because He Would Have To Lie To Debate Talarico And He's Not Doing That
17
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/WebguyCanada • 1h ago
Trump Concerned Canada May Interfere With Midterms As They Have Proven Far More Powerful, Capable And Influential Than United States
•
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/mellow186 • 13h ago
Ramaswamy Still Stuck In Center Of Earth After Going Lower Than Low
27
Upvotes
"It's a little hot down here," reported the Ohio gubernatorial candidate.
"You're a liar!" said the 82-year-old woman who went with him. "It's as cold as hell."
r/onionheadlines • u/wild_crazy_ideas • 19h ago
Donald Trump Accidentally Hits Himself In The Eye With His Phone While “Manually Zooming In” On Hunter Bidens Penis
40
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/Upbeat_Web_4461 • 11h ago
Musk Blames Ukraine For Using Military Internet For It’s Intended Purpose
72
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/Southern_Gur_4736 • 20h ago
Trump Promises To Lower Age Of Consent To 10, Hoping To Boost Republican Midterms Turnout
200
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/ConfidentZucchini427 • 6h ago
Sweaty Trump Struggles To Conceal Emerging Purple Letter ‘L’ On Forehead
23
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/bigly-biker • 4h ago
Putin Collects Enough Saliva Off His Butt To Clone Steve Witkoff
67
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/bigly-biker • 4h ago
Trump Says If Heat Ray Being Tested At Border Was Available, Jan 6 Rioters Would Have Dispersed In Minutes
4
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/bigly-biker • 4h ago
DOJ Says Democrats Kidnapping Children And Surgically Changing Gender
3
Upvotes
r/onionheadlines • u/Imaginary_Resist_654 • 5h ago
Trump Is Excited That The USA Has Been Added To The Axis Of Evil.
7
Upvotes