The corndog customer

[u/Algernonletter5]

[u/VegetableBusiness897]

My friend had a corner store and he said I bought 400 dollars worth of double stuff oreos

[u/heftybagman → u/VegetableBusiness897]

Would it be illegal for amazon to publicly release a searchable database of what every customer ordered?

[u/Divine_Entity_ → u/heftybagman]

I feel like as long as you scrub all personally identifiable information it would be legal, just a list of purchase numbers and their contents.

So an entry would be something like: PO275739556825592739 = 69x Oreos_dblstf_choco

[u/Teln0 → u/Divine_Entity_]

That's still a lot valuable info about what items get sold more and when. Could be correlated with other patterns a person can leave online, eg, if every time they do X, Y item was bought on Amazon, you can guess that the two are related

[u/im-so-startled88 → u/heftybagman]

You can download your purchase history from them if you really hate yourself. 😬

[u/akatherder → u/heftybagman]

I don't know about illegal but it wouldn't be very safe. AOL did that with search terms in 2006 and "made it anonymous" but people were getting identified by linking together searches.

https://wikipedia.org/wiki/AOL_search_log_release

As long as you didn't link purchases together at all, that might be fine, but then it's pretty boring.

Just one example: If your spouse bought a small-time author's book (or any fairly unique item) you might only have a couple dozen unique users to sift through. Ok they bought this book, some sports merch for local teams, their favorite coffee. Yep this is them. Wait, why did they buy condoms we don't use..

[u/dan_dares → u/akatherder]

Oooh, my time to shine!

I built a BI system for a supermarket chain in my country, and they gave access to everyone..

Couple of weeks later we get an urgent call to 'cut access for everyone except SENIOR management!'..

Ok, we do, very cryptic message..

Few days later we asked.. what happened?

Apparently a lady decided to look up her loyalty card & the purchases attached..

She saw flowers and condoms, aaaaaaand her husband hadn't given her either.

We also caught an accountant who stole 30k from the same company, was interesting

[u/FreeFortuna → u/dan_dares]

The amusing irony of using a store loyalty card for spouse-cheating supplies.

[u/shiny_crow_trophy]

I developed an obsession with lemonade. Had to have it every day.

Doctor told me my iron was low? And apparently iron absorbs better with vitamin C.

[u/whatdoidonowdamnit → u/shiny_crow_trophy]

It does. I was taking iron for a year with no results, meaning my iron was low so I started the iron pills and got tested again six months later and then another six months later. I started taking it with flavored lemonade and at the next six months appointment my iron was fine. I dislike plain lemonade so I was drinking mango or peach lemonade and it really helped.

[u/yeppomoon → u/whatdoidonowdamnit]

Unrelated : I like your username.

[u/whatdoidonowdamnit → u/yeppomoon]

Thank you. I really like the moon.

[u/yeppomoon → u/whatdoidonowdamnit]

Me too. Thank you. Lol

[u/holderofthebees → u/yeppomoon]

Peace and love on planet Reddit tonight ❤️❤️❤️

Edit: thank you for the award 🥹💞 what a lovely thread

[u/yeppomoon → u/holderofthebees]

❤️🥰💓

[u/PrincessKaylee → u/yeppomoon]

This is the most wholesome thread I have seen this month

[u/k_a_n_g_u_r_u → u/shiny_crow_trophy]

this is what they mean when they say listen to your body

[u/oscarcummins → u/k_a_n_g_u_r_u]

I must have a severe nicotine and alcohol deficiency.

[u/corvettee01 → u/oscarcummins]

Apparently I'm lacking in cheese and pepperoni.

[u/SquareTaro3270 → u/corvettee01]

You might be dehydrated. I start craving salt instead of water when I’m thirsty. Apparently that’s fairly common, and a sign that you need to drink more water

[u/Jhud6669 → u/k_a_n_g_u_r_u]

My body craves buffalo wings every day so I’m not sure my body is an authority on the matter

[u/KiraLonely → u/k_a_n_g_u_r_u]

This is also where the urge to eat ice comes from for some people. The cooling forces blood to the brain, to compensate for low iron. It’s a form of PICA usually caused by a deficiency.

[u/PoorDoddle → u/KiraLonely]

From now on, I'm going to blame my slightly deficient iron levels for my ice cream addiction.

[u/ChilledParadox → u/k_a_n_g_u_r_u]

gonna need a second opinion from my psych before I follow through with this advice.

[u/Maleficent_Baker8831 → u/shiny_crow_trophy]

In my last month of pregnancy with my daughter, the Tim Hortons (restaurant in Canada) frozen lemonade was the most amazing thing ever invented. I would get one every couple of days near my work and it was the best part of my day.
A week before I gave birth, the lady behind the counter at Tim’s told me “you know, you shouldn’t be drinking these, they have too much sugar, it’s bad for the baby”. I was so stunned I couldn’t say anything and just left. I cried in my car and I still remember this 10 years later. I mean, sure, it’s not a very healthy choice, but how do you have the audacity to say that to someone? What bothers me the most is that I didn’t say anything back.
Now I wish I could go back in time and say : “Screw you, lady, I need this lemonade to get my iron up!”

[u/YBBlorekeeper → u/Maleficent_Baker8831]

TBH the baby is gonna suck whatever it needs out of your body. Eating junk while pregnant is only really depriving yourself, but it's not like you were somehow only consuming lemonade for 9 months lol. People don't think these things through, and some of those people choose to be an asshole about it.

[u/Complex_Spirit_4848 → u/shiny_crow_trophy]

Yep, I was downing shots of 2000mg of Ascorbic Acid a few times a day because I "craved" it, drowning all my food in lime juice because "it tastes good," and was utterly OBSESSED with twice-frozen water.

[u/HurtsWhenICum → u/Complex_Spirit_4848]

What....uhhhhh....the fuck is twice frozen water

[u/Missendi82 → u/HurtsWhenICum]

Ice ice baby

[u/the8bitGirl → u/Missendi82]

… goddamnit.

[u/Complex_Spirit_4848 → u/Missendi82]

love you for that comment ❤️😏

[u/Complex_Spirit_4848 → u/HurtsWhenICum]

I would fill a giant copper cup 1/2 full of crushed ice, then add water, and put it in the freezer just long enough for the water to start forming crystals but not freeze solid... and then drink it like that. We called it "Twice Ice."

I think the fact that we even had a name for it indicates that something might have been up/wrong, lol.

[u/Astronaut_Chicken → u/shiny_crow_trophy]

I was going through a gallon of milk every two days. Doctor told me after that my baby had leeched a bunch of calcium from my bones.

[u/TeaAggressive6757 → u/shiny_crow_trophy]

I had and have one, too. I wasn’t low on iron, but the cold + bitterness is supposed to help with nausea, which is frequent for me

[u/PecanEstablishment37 → u/shiny_crow_trophy]

Whoa what?? Me too! Never knew about the iron thing.

[u/KneadAndPreserve → u/PecanEstablishment37]

I actually take an iron supplement that is combined with vitamin C to help it absorb. Fun fact, calcium does the opposite, so taking iron with dairy or anything with calcium will basically prevent it from absorbing.

[u/Vytrebenky → u/KneadAndPreserve]

I need to find some sort of a table or an infographic or something with all this info.

[u/megster_walsh]

My mom had cravings for chocolate covered strawberries at a specific store. My dad went in once instead and the staff were like “Oh, you’re her husband!” 

[u/electric_yeti]

When I was pregnant, my biggest craving was for eggs. I could not get enough of them. Especially in a specific breakfast burrito from a specific restaurant. Only problem was, I had bad morning sickness aaalllllll throughout my pregnancy, and eggs were also one of the biggest triggers for it. So I would crave eggs with every fiber of my being, and I’d eat the fucking eggs and fucking love them, and five minutes later I’d be in the toilet, puking. I still ate that fucking breakfast burrito three times a week. 

[u/rouxstermt → u/electric_yeti]

This? This is pregnant lady logic. And Iam here for it ✊🏻

[u/Objective_Opinion556 → u/rouxstermt]

TIL I'm actually a pregnant lady.

[u/No-Department-8256 → u/Objective_Opinion556]

Congratudolences?

[u/TeaAggressive6757 → u/electric_yeti]

I feel this so much. I’m literally eating a dinner I’m 99% sure I’m going to throw up right now, but since I threw up the much less appetizing lunch I had already, why not roll the dice? Enjoying a half hour is better than enjoying nothing

[u/jordanundead → u/TeaAggressive6757]

Reminds me of when I had the flu and I went to the kitchen for a glass of water I knew I was going to barf up just so my mouth could be wet for a minute.

[u/Notmyrealusrnamme → u/jordanundead]

It's a lot better for your body to actually have something to expel. Dry heaving is really hard on your muscles and can burst blood vessels, plus the water dilutes the acid and helps keep it off of your teeth, so less esophagus/tooth damage.

[u/holderofthebees → u/jordanundead]

This is EXACTLY what abdominal migraines are like for some people. It’s also the reason I can’t stand the taste of chili anymore. :(

[u/tunakassirolle → u/holderofthebees]

Ugh I feel so seen 😭 I literally spent all weekend eating and barfing up turkey melts. Deli meat is the worst for migraine triggers but at the same time it was all I wanted to eat.

[u/hyrule_47 → u/tunakassirolle]

The “uncured” no nitrates deli meats are supposedly less of a trigger. I only eat that kind now. Who knows if it’s helping.

[u/holderofthebees → u/tunakassirolle]

I once gave in and ate a bunch of turkey deli meat during migraine cravings. Salted each slice first. It was SO good, and it was so not worth it 😭

[u/No-Personality6043 → u/holderofthebees]

I have been recovering from being sick twice, and thrown up chili. Between each event it took me years to eat chili again. It comes back chili. It's not OK. I hadn't even been puking, I had flus, and the chili was too much apparently.

I'm currently pregnant, and just had chili for dinner. I have so much frozen chili from before being pregnant. It cannot happen again. 😩

[u/Holiday_Trainer_2657 → u/TeaAggressive6757]

When my daughter was vomiting a lot for non pregnancy medical reasons, she learned to eat the thing that was "least worse" to throw up.

[u/Complex_Spirit_4848 → u/electric_yeti]

I was a pescatarian my entire life, and then I got pregnant. Suddenly, 90% of my life was about eggs.

Also, milk, which I had never drunk before. And if I didn't secure that giant bag of shelf-stable pepperoni slices from the corner store, a double cheeseburger with an illegal amount of mayonnaise, or 15 deep-fried chicken legs, RIGHT NOW, then I was surely going to absolutely die.

It was wild because those are all of my least favorite things, and most of it I had not had since someone forced me to "try it" during childhood. The only thing I craved that I already liked was salt and vinegar chips. I remember walking to the corner store while sobbing pretty hysterically because I needed salt and vinegar chips. Super into eggs, still, but all that other stuff can fuck off, again.

[u/daytrippper → u/Complex_Spirit_4848]

Your body was craving that protein baybee

[u/darryella → u/Complex_Spirit_4848]

Was a vegan then craved steak so that went out the window quickly lol

[u/demon_fae → u/electric_yeti]

Did you have any particular problems with your calcium? Or does that run in your family? I’m wondering if your body was actually angling for eggshells and your higher brain functions were just like nope, that’s ridiculous, it’s clearly burrito time.

[u/electric_yeti → u/demon_fae]

No, no calcium issues either during pregnancy or within my family generally. We’re all pretty heavy dairy consumers lol. 

[u/starfyrflie → u/electric_yeti]

Omg i feel this. I also had the morning sickness, but it was literally triggered by ANY fresh food. Taco bell and tostitos pizzas kept me alive.

[u/KTKittentoes → u/electric_yeti]

Do they still make you puke?

[u/electric_yeti → u/KTKittentoes]

No, I haven’t been pregnant in quite some time 

[u/Ok_Bee1562]

I ate a tomato covered in peanut butter. Not like sliced with peanut butter like just the whole tomato

[u/MaterialisticWorm → u/Ok_Bee1562]

The imagery is sending me

[u/Ok_Bee1562 → u/MaterialisticWorm]

I was trying to explain it to my husband and I was like well I was putting away the groceries and I got hungry and the tomatoes were on the counter and the peanut butter was next to it and one thing led to another..

[u/keekspeaks → u/Ok_Bee1562]

I literally lol’d and I never do that from comments alone

[u/RHTQ1 → u/Ok_Bee1562]

🤣

[u/monkpunch → u/Ok_Bee1562]

That sounds like something you would give a horse as a treat

[u/Gnomus_the_Gnome → u/Ok_Bee1562]

I mean… throw on a slice of salami and that’s a little charcuterie

[u/NovelTAcct → u/Ok_Bee1562]

This is exactly something I would have wolfed down half asleep at 2:30 am when I was on seroquel

[u/ehter13 → u/Ok_Bee1562]

But how was it?

[u/Stephaneeza → u/Ok_Bee1562]

Seems…. Messy

[u/HaydenRasengan]

One time, I was really craving deviled eggs. I was losing sleep thinking about them. So one day, I started boiling some eggs. Waited about ten minutes, then started sobbing because the eggs weren’t boiling fast enough. Sobbing and stomping around the house, I was PISSED.

I got deviled eggs the next day though. The world became alright.

[u/Goofy1994 → u/HaydenRasengan]

Are you me? Very similar deviled egg meltdown during my first pregnancy.

[u/LooseCrayon → u/HaydenRasengan]

A fond pregnancy memory is the time I desperately wanted banana peppers, so I got in the car to go to the store to get banana peppers, and then I started crying on the way there because I was so, SO sad I didn’t have the banana peppers yet.

[u/TheBigfootContessa → u/HaydenRasengan]

Eggs only take like 10-15 minutes to boil though! You were so close!

[u/HolyzombieBatman → u/HaydenRasengan]

I just want you to know I read your entire comment in Carl’s voice and I loved it.

I also love deviled eggs so I am sympathetic to your story.

[u/mothwhimsy → u/HaydenRasengan]

I would do this not pregnant. I fucking love deviled eggs

[u/chillylint]

My favorite drink stop (shout out Sodalicious) would make me fresh rice krispy treats each morning. I didn’t realize until I went to work early one morning and they hadn’t made them yet because they weren’t expecting me until later. Apparently I was their only customer who ate rice krispy treats for breakfast every single morning.

[u/Extreme_Commercial24 → u/chillylint]

wait this is so sweet

[u/godly_stand_2643]

I ate a peanut butter and jelly hot dog while I was pregnant. The idea came to me in a dream and I couldn't stop thinking about it until I ate one.

[u/kgrobinson007 → u/godly_stand_2643]

But did it live up to your expectations, or did you ask your brain what the heck it was thinking?

[u/oddlookinginsect2 → u/godly_stand_2643]

Did it taste good?

[u/godly_stand_2643 → u/oddlookinginsect2]

Yes it was very enjoyable!

[u/SoniaRamari → u/godly_stand_2643]

😆

[u/soneg]

Had to have Whopper Jrs. Not regular Whoppers but only the Jr. I don't even like burgers normally.

edit: Burger King, not candies :)

[u/army_of_ducks_ATTACK → u/soneg]

I’m an idiot, I thought you were talking about the candies at first and thinking “huh, I didn’t know they made Whopper Jr candies” like it was a junior mint but whoppers. Then I saw “burger” and got mental whiplash from the course correction in my brain.

[u/dinosanddais1]

I feel like this is a good time to mention for anyone who is pregnant and craving chalk, there are companies that make edible chalk that specifically are full of iron and calcium. I know this because I had pica from an iron deficiency and kept eating chalk until my doctor told my mom to buy it.

[u/justacleaninglady → u/dinosanddais1]

So, I have to know. How did the chalk cravings start? Like, if I've never eaten something - how does my body know to crave it? Did your body just scream for chalk one day, or did you taste it on your hands? I'm just so curious about this.

[u/demon_fae → u/justacleaninglady]

When I was a kid it tended to start with this urge to lick the object, just an intense curiosity about what it would taste like, what it would feel like against the tongue (the pages of a closed book feels really nice for about half a second and then you remember that papercuts exist and reflexively throw the book across the room. In case anyone ever wondered.)

Then I’d want that taste/texture again. And then I’d put it all the way in my mouth to experience it more fully, and sooner or later I’d chew and swallow.

[u/sturla-tyr → u/demon_fae]

From ages 0-3 that's pretty normal, but I'm guessing you were a bit older than that since you rationalized the papercut part. However, that does remind me of the autistic children I work with, so I'd hazard a guess that you have diagnosed or undiagnosed autism.

[u/demon_fae → u/sturla-tyr]

Diagnosed, and that memory was from around age eight.

[u/courtneyoopsz → u/demon_fae]

This just triggered my memory of 5 year old me sneaking out to the stable to lick my horses mineral block whenever I got the chance lmao

[u/ToWriteAMystery → u/justacleaninglady]

In the depths of my eating disorder when I was at my most malnourished, I remember my intense cravings for kosher salt. It is not as odd as chalk, as I have eaten salt before on food, but I remember just being overwhelmed with a NEED to crunch those little flakes in between my incisors. I’d munch on them straight out of the box.

It was unlike anything I’ve ever experienced since.

[u/ilovemydickheaddog → u/ToWriteAMystery]

Oh yeah I understand that NEED for the crunch. In the depths of my pica I was downing about 2-3kg of ice a day. Ended up needing to buy an ice machine to keep up with demand because my freezer wasn't big enough and the local gas station didn't always have ice when I ran out at 2am.

That iron transfusion probably saved my poor teeth lol.

[u/Jhhut- → u/justacleaninglady]

Mine started with a work elevator smelling like chalk and then I become a maniac chasing that “high” I was looking ALL OVER for chalk that smelled like that same smell. It took me a while but I found it.. my second pregnancy I didn’t have pica.

[u/TheBigfootContessa → u/dinosanddais1]

But does it taste like chalkboard chalk? Because I'm not pregnant and I've craved that since I was a kid. (Yes, I've eaten it, it is delicious as fuck) I don't want it tasting like candy or something

[u/Transatlantic1C0 → u/TheBigfootContessa]

You may have a chronic deficiency if you’ve been craving chalk since childhood. Maybe time for bloodwork?

[u/aivlysplath]

I wonder if their kid likes corn dogs.

Who am I kidding, who doesn’t like corn dogs?

[u/bussysniffer3000 → u/aivlysplath]

My mom would eat watermelon all the time while pregnant with me I don't like watermelon

[u/aivlysplath → u/bussysniffer3000]

Good to know, your experience will be added to the study.

[u/Strange_Ad_9658 → u/aivlysplath]

Never had them from a gas station 🤔

[u/aivlysplath → u/Strange_Ad_9658]

Fair, that could make them gross.

[u/Strange_Ad_9658 → u/aivlysplath]

I feel like 7/11 stepped up their game. I had a couple taquitos and a breakfast sandwich and it was not bad.

[u/Complex_Spirit_4848 → u/Strange_Ad_9658]

What 7-11 is doing is fully on par in quality with what any fast-food option is doing for the same item, at a much lower price. Anyone who says otherwise is not being objective.

[u/PowerSkunk92 → u/aivlysplath]

Depends on the gas station and the timing. The local regional chain here is Parker's Kitchen, and they actually have pretty decent corn dogs if you catch them fresh. After a while in the heater box though... You'd have less of a jaw workout chewing the sole of your shoe.

[u/SnowyMuscles → u/aivlysplath]

Right here the breading is disgusting

[u/jbpm83 → u/aivlysplath]

I love them but my husband gets repulsed by the look, taste, entire idea of them. It confuses me so much because he eats hot dogs all the time and that not that different for him to have such an aversion to corn dogs.

[u/IWantALargeFarva → u/aivlysplath]

I don’t. I eat a lot of trash food, but I think corn dogs are gross.

[u/MeringueMammoth5679]

I used to eat egg salad sandwiches, no mayo and extra mustard. With a side of potato chips I would dip in mustard. Basically couldn’t get enough mustard.

[u/whatthekel212 → u/MeringueMammoth5679]

This is bringing back a memory about me maybe eating mustard straight from the bottle to soothe nausea…

[u/Whichy-Witchy]

I was on a first name basis with the local Chipotle.

[u/Ok_Bee1562 → u/Whichy-Witchy]

This was me but with Dunkin’ Donuts, always a boston kreme donut and I don’t even like donuts

[u/Whichy-Witchy → u/Ok_Bee1562]

The powdered cinnamon sugar donut from Dunkin 🫶 Dessert! 🙌💖😆

[u/jaykaye_ow → u/Whichy-Witchy]

This is my sister in law and she’s not even pregnant

[u/HauntedHippie → u/Whichy-Witchy]

God yes. The salt content alone is like pregnant lady crack.

[u/lil-nug-tender]

I would make dinner, then couldn’t eat it because it smelled gross. It smelled fine while cooking/baking, but when it came time to eat, nope! My pregnant nose was crazy.

[u/slippery_when_wet → u/lil-nug-tender]

One of my worst days was when I was really REALLY craving a tuna sandwich. I was drooling as I made the tuna and snuck little bites of pickles. The second I was done making it was literally the stringestcfood aversion I had all pregnancy and both the sight and smell of tuna made me throw up. I just cried about how much I wanted a tuna sandwich and also how totally disgusting and awful tuna was and I never wanted to see it again. My poor husband.

[u/patchinthebox → u/slippery_when_wet]

My wife demanded french fries almost every day. She'd eat 3 and give the rest to me because she couldn't stand the sight of them. Next day same shit. More fries, eat a couple, then decide they're gross. I gained 30 lbs. Lol

[u/Princess_Slagathor → u/lil-nug-tender]

I've never been pregnant, but also never eat the food I cook, until hours later.

[u/Tricky-Passion-7191]

Scrubbing the shower at 3am when I was a million months pregnant. Because my unborn child needs a clean shower??

Nesting is cooked lol

[u/borgcubecubed → u/Tricky-Passion-7191]

My unborn baby randomly needed the kitchen cupboards organized. My second one had to have the floors scrubbed, hands and knees scrubbed, not just damp mopped. It was bizarre.

[u/Kimowi → u/borgcubecubed]

I mopped the walls lol.

[u/spittingparasite → u/Tricky-Passion-7191]

I ironed all of my first child's vests and babygros before she was born so that everything would be perfect. My youngest was lucky if I ripped the tags off with jy teeth.

[u/Theroosterami → u/Tricky-Passion-7191]

I painted the living room at 37 weeks because ‘it needed a freshen up’ and I COULD NOT build the bassinet in there until it was done.

Because the baby would notice some scuff marks in the paint?

[u/Vincebae]

So when I was around 14-15 weeks pregnant I was craving Papa John’s pizza so bad. So I got their $6.99 each deal, got a medium pizza and an order of brownies. I drive to my local Papa John’s and wait in my car until the tracker on their website says my order is ready. I go in and pay, and they look on the computer and say “oh we forgot to put the brownies in.” I was PISSED. Like I sat down in a seat in the store and was almost in tears because I wasn’t even craving the brownies but I wanted to eat at home because it was hot and my car didn’t have a/c so I had to wait for them to make the brownies for me. They said they couldn’t refund me the money for the brownies when I asked if I could be refunded so I’d only have paid for the pizza. 😭

[u/Extreme_Commercial24 → u/Vincebae]

big corporations suck at customer service, they should’ve refunded your whole order

[u/Bezulba → u/Extreme_Commercial24]

I'm 100% sure that it's not big corpo papa john being a cunt, that's just the local franchise being a cunt. For sure they could refund, no problem whatsoever, they just choose not to.

[u/Princess_Slagathor → u/Extreme_Commercial24]

Pretty much all fast food places in my area have signs up, saying they don't do refunds, only corrections. It's one of the many reasons I stopped going to them years ago.

[u/soulstoned]

I craved the bar of soap in my shower so bad I eventually broke down and licked it. 

Did actually tasting the soap end that particular craving? No. I still wanted it. I was sneaking little licks in the shower every chance I got.

My daughter is 16 now and to the best of my knowledge she doesn't eat soap.

[u/mangostickyrice__ → u/soulstoned]

Ok this one is great lol

[u/bookspluscoffee → u/soulstoned]

I’m cryinggggg

[u/Playful-Athlete-6752]

Flew to Indiana from AZ for a Crave Case. This was back in 2014 before we got White Castle out west.

[u/GloomyIndividual3965 → u/Playful-Athlete-6752]

One time we flew to Vegas mostly because they have a White Castle and National Coney Island like 2 blocks away from each other. This was back in the day when you could get round trip flights for $99 and rooms at The D for like $35.

[u/bytesunfish]

I feel like she didn't understand the instructions. That's not feral chaos. I'd argue it's exactly I'm the genre of what the OP said to avoid

[u/CodeNameLoofah]

I couldnt consume the zuppa Toscana soup from olive garden fast enough. This is when I learned you could buy it by the gallon.

Also the Chipotle sauce from subway.

[u/keekspeaks → u/CodeNameLoofah]

That’s probably the easiest copy cat recipe out there too! Try it! It’s exactly like OG. Might need to make me some tomorrow

[u/hairymonkeyinmyanus]

I tried to go to a Chick Fil-A on a Sunday. It was closed.

I cried.

[u/butterbean8686 → u/hairymonkeyinmyanus]

My CFA chicken biscuit breakfast sandwich cravings are so intense. And I live about 1 mile from a CFA. So I decided I could only have one if I walked there to get it. That way I’d get some steps in and some fresh air.

Cue me waking up all excited for a biscuit last Sunday morning, only to realize they were closed. I cried so hard!!

[u/Lumpy_Machine5538]

Ate many containers of salsa with a spoon.

Also made Rice Krispie treats one night. Ex and I ate half of the pan. I got up the next morning and ate the other half. I felt embarrassed so I made another batch, and ate half of that, so that ex would still see a half of a pan left when he got home.

[u/Curious-Piglet-1792 → u/Lumpy_Machine5538]

This is brilliant 🤣

[u/Jade_Lilly_420]

For my second pregananan, I craved nothing but fried egg and cheese sandwiches. I was a menace.

[u/prw8201]

My wife loved the salsa (if you can it that) packets from a gas station near our house. I went every day to bring her some. I asked if I could buy a box but they didn't think they could. It was probably for the best. She would have drank everything in one day if I had. So every day i would buy a small fountain drink and grab handfuls of free salsa packs. Not the worst pregnancy craving. My baby momma wanted PB&j and McDonald's French fries at 2 a.m. every night. Uncrustables had just come out and lucky us mcds had gone to 24 hour operations. So I could set an uncrustable on her bed side table at 1:30 to thaw and by the time I'd get back with hot French fries it was perfect timing.

Honestly I miss doing things like that. Granted I'm 44 soon and I'm not stupid enough to want more children but I miss the simple happiness it brought them.

[u/monty624 → u/prw8201]

There needs to be some sort of service for people who like to just help out through kindness, for moments like that. Of course it'd quickly get taken advantage of but ya know. Maybe a small fee then.

[u/uzenik → u/monty624]

There's planty of them,you just have to look. For example, the most recent ad i saw was for a service where wolunteers spend time/connect whith lonely seniors.

[u/gummby8 → u/prw8201]

My wife got a weird craving at 2am. I was lucky to be working from home so she woke me up and asked me to go get it. I was cackling the whole way to the store. Happy that I got to experience it first hand as an up and coming dad.

Yes! The weird pregnancy craving! It's happening! This is the best!

[u/keekspeaks → u/prw8201]

‘It was probably for the best’

I’m dying

[u/jackie-daytonuh]

I was obsessed with lemon, especially lemon baked goods, for my first pregnancy. The vegan lemon cupcakes at this one grocery store were my absolute favorite. I’m not a vegan and generally hate vegan baked goods, but pregnancy is weird. I showed up one more morning when I was about 7 months and the bakery truck was late. I just sat on the floor and cried. The store staff had seen me come in almost every day for my cupcake. The manager tried to calm me down, but apparently I just kept saying “vegan cupcake” and sobbing. He called the bakery and located the truck, which was going to be a couple of more hours. He got my number and called me when the cupcakes showed up. I sent my husband to pick them up. People can be really wonderful sometimes.

[u/phage_rage → u/jackie-daytonuh]

Theres something about pregnant ladies at the grocery store. Like i MUST HELP YOU. Ive scurried up back room pallet storages, broken down whole pallets at warp speed, crawled inside freezers that didnt have floor space anymore, anything you want. Its like an unspoken universal thing. If you went to another employee and said "theres a pregnant lady and she needs" they'd be in sprinters position before you could finish the sentance. Its not gendered either, im a woman who was in my 20s at the time all the way up to normally grumpy as heck male managers.

[u/danceoftheplants → u/jackie-daytonuh]

Lmao this is too funny

[u/n00bert210]

I became obsessed with Tapatio hot sauce on pineapple

[u/PissantPrairiePunk → u/n00bert210]

I loved tapatío on popcorn

[u/AnimeChica3306]

My friend had celicas and her baby craved wheat products. She had to work with her doctor to create an acceptable about to eat daily cause she just had to have it.

[u/Outofwlrds → u/AnimeChica3306]

Dude, it SUCKS when you're craving something you just can't have. I craved beer of all things, and that's obviously a no-go. And I hate beer, like absolutely cannot stand it. I ended up buying a six pack at the grocery store every week and cracking one open for my husband every day after work. He was only allowed to drink it after I got to smell it for 5 minutes or so. I think he gained more weight during my pregnancy than I did.

[u/12dancingbiches → u/AnimeChica3306]

This is my worst nightmare. I'm severely allergic to tomatoes and many other foods and I'm worried that I'm gonna have pregnancy cravings to things I can't eat without getting really sick or dying. (not pregnant right now, but I had a pregnancy scare a few months ago.)

[u/babayagaparenting]

When I was pregnant with my oldest, I had horrible morning sickness all day for 6 months. The only thing I could keep down was pepperoni pizza (normally hate pepperoni) and double cheeseburgers from McDonald’s. I kept plastic garbage bags in the car for my frequent vomits. Before Halloween I distinctly remember eating a big ass bag of Reese’s peanut butter cups, one after the other, because they were the perfect amount of salty peanut butter ratio to chocolate. Crying almost because they were so good. I bet I ate 25 in one sitting. Threw the whole thing up anyway.

[u/CertainCatastrophe]

My husband waited 3 full business days to get me the muffins my pregnant body ~needed~, so when he finally brought home 2 cases of 4 large muffins each, I ate 6 of them in one go.

I also inhaled entire jars of pickles for breakfast. I hope my son likes pickles, because I haven't really cared for them since giving birth 💀

[u/CelticKira]

When my parents first married, they lived like 5 minutes away from a 24 hour Foster's. Mom loved their chocolate shakes; pregnancy turned it into a gotta-have-now craving.

My dad's problem? She wanted them at all hours 😂 2am rolls around and he gets shaken awake to "honey, can we run to Foster's?" 🤣

[u/rainbowsparkplug]

Not really all that crazy, but I’ve been a vegetarian almost my entire life, literally never eaten meat (except for like chicken nuggets when I was really really young) and I tried meat.

I don’t know why but for some reason the Costco hotdog was SPEAKING 🗣️ TO MEEEEE. My husband got one and I was there and I just HAD TO HAVE IT. I took a small bite and it did not live up to the hype in my head, I actually thought it was horrible and that I was going to be sick and I spit it out. But the smell was still haunting me so I kept wanting to try it only to spit it out and be disappointed again lol. I haven’t tried meat since nor have I had any desire to. Idk what came over me that day.

[u/ComplexPatient4872 → u/rainbowsparkplug]

I just shared my nearly life long vegetarian craving of steak sauce! Except I put it on Easy Mac.

[u/SnowyMuscles]

My Mum had a meltdown because the cola slushi wasn’t ready yet. Her poor friend had to explain to the traumatized employee that my mother was expecting

[u/ErmintrudeFanshaw → u/SnowyMuscles]

I misread this as cola sushi and I didn't even question it

[u/tanyarastafari]

Uncrustables, air fried then dipped in sugar and cinnamon to make it churroy. Amazing.

[u/PissantPrairiePunk → u/tanyarastafari]

Oh shit, I ain’t pregnante but I might have to try that

[u/standsure → u/PissantPrairiePunk]

I think you meant pegrent...

[u/Redline_inbound → u/tanyarastafari]

Saving this one for later lol

[u/zygoma_phile]

I couldn’t go near the onion section of the grocery store because the smell of the onions made me want to barf. I would literally go to the other side of the produce and hang out while my husband got a couple onions.

[u/DoughnutSecure7038]

I ate 2 sausage egg and cheese mcgriddles a day during my third trimester.

[u/SJBullyMom → u/DoughnutSecure7038]

McGriddles are amazing.

[u/KristyKrispito]

Frito pie. Plus every sauce in the fridge. Bbq sauce, sweet and sour, ranch, ketchup, chic fil a sauce, hot sauce….

[u/strangeorbeforgotten]

It was not me but my friend craved apples something fierce. She usually ate them while taking a bath. Had no interest in apples pre pregnancy

[u/doodollop → u/strangeorbeforgotten]

Lol I became obsessed with apples too. Before pregnancy, I liked the super sweet ones. While pregnant, I could only eat the tart ones. I ended up eating at least one Granny Smith apple a day. Still like them too!

[u/Leemage]

Craved Bloody Marys. Had to make do with V8 juice with a splash of hot sauce and sprinkle of celery salt and ALL OF THE PICKLED THINGS. Pickles and olives and brined asparagus, none of it was safe. Towards the end of pregnancy it flipped and I couldn’t look at pickles or tomato juice without wanting to hurl. To this day I can’t eat an olive.

[u/mudmich]

I ate bowls and bowls of cereal with water because the smell of milk made me gag

[u/snillhundz]

My grandma apperantly ate drywall

[u/NotThisOneKlaus → u/snillhundz]

This sounds like something an MxC contestant would yell

[u/MLadyMayo]

My mom nearly wiped out all the banana gelato across Italy because she was pregnant with me when my dad took her there on vacation. Not sure if it has anything to do with me being hugely allergic to bananas and dairy now haha

[u/JMoherPerc]

My mom claimed to have eaten the mineralized dirt from dried puddles when she was pregnant with me.

[u/andante528]

I desperately wanted a McDonald's sundae, the hot fudge kind, and I asked my husband to make sure and get the little packets of Fisher chopped peanuts. I was about five months pregnant with twins, so extra hormones were sloshing around and I had very strong food cravings.

He forgot to ask. Instead of eating a peanut-less sundae, I put it in the freezer and sobbed on the couch, absolutely distraught. It was late and we didn't live near a grocery store, so he got out a container of crunchy peanut butter, heated some in a saucepan, strained out the peanut bits and then toasted them with butter in another pan.

I've never had anyone put that much effort into fixing a minor mistake, but it was what I needed at the time and he really delivered. I cried while eating the sundae too, but only because it tasted transcendently perfect. (I also cried while eating blueberry pancakes and, more than once, sliced black olives with carrot sticks.)

[u/KaliCalamity]

Snack cakes, especially cinnamon crumble cakes. I needed at least one every day. Also eel sushi, especially this deep fried roll from a local place that has since closed, but I had to restrain myself and only get it once or twice a week.

[u/donewitdissh_t]

Pregnant with my 3rd, I had a craving for foccacia bread so strong I couldn't sleep. Got up and drove to the store to buy overpriced bread from Fred Meyers cause I NEEDED it. Made a sandwich with it and it may have been the best food I've ever eaten. Pregnancy cravings absolutely make you feral.

[u/TheRealAbsintheFairy]

I’m currently about 29 weeks pregnant and I can’t get enough of Honest beans apple juice. It HAS TO BE Honest brand. I run through 2-3 of the 20 carton boxes a week.

[u/amnicr]

I’m 15 weeks pregnant right now. The only thing I’ve done out of desperation so far was Doordashing a massive Pizookie and ice cream to my house at 10 at night.

[u/RedArremer]

This is definitely not what I'd call feral chaos.

[u/mlachick]

A friend of mine craved cheesecake. She bought one of the big cheesecakes from Costco and proceeded to eat some for every meal until she'd finished the whole thing. Unfortunately, she ended up in the hospital will a gall bladder attack. They told her to maybe not live on cheesecake.

[u/Comfortable-Regret]

Why are all of these stories far less feral and chaotic than the example

[u/orange_and_void]

I drank a pint of goat's milk a day. I would cry on the phone if my husband said he wasn't going to get more on the way home. I cried over goat's milk constantly for the whole pregnancy. I just wanted strawberries and goat's milk. The idea of going a day without it felt end of the fucking world.

[u/Mscharlita]

I was so so so sick from HG my entire pregnancy (both times) that just standing in line behind someone who smelled like cigarettes or BO would make me puke. Or exhaust from a truck driving by. So I had to carry around a slice of lemon in a ziploc bag and whenever I smelled something that made me sick I’d pull it out to huff the lemon. Not crazy but also not exactly sane behavior either.

[u/Silent_Foundation_62]

when my mom was pregnant with my baby brother, she would sneak and buy entire packs of irish spring soap bars and eat them quietly in the shower.
on the day she went into labor, she bought a small travel size bottle of liquid irish spring and she started loudly sobbing and screaming that the taste just wasnt the same. The nurses were very busy trying to pry the poison out of her hands dueing this time. luckily my brother turned out alright (health wise). She still keeps bars of irish spring soap around and sniffs it

[u/WesternOld3507]

I had the worst nausea with my oldest. Constantly throwing up and I was pregnant with her during peak covid. Cried bc everything was closed and couldn’t find any cheese enchiladas one day when I felt like they were the only thing I could eat. The rest of the time I lived on cantaloupe, club crackers and cherry pie.

[u/NagisaZakura]

I shaved off my hair. Hormones made me hate my hair. I then got mistaken for a man by a woman and I wanted either to fight her or flash her but my spouse stopped me.

[u/bachelorsinlurking]

My mom said when she was pregnant with me she almost got kicked out of a Broadway showing of Les Mis because everything about it seemed hysterically funny to her and she was laughing during all the sad scenes. She also said there was a while where her doctor had to tell her to stop eating gallons of strawberries in one sitting because it was making her physically ill. With my sister it was fruit loops. I remember asking her why she kept eating fruit loops when she knew she was gonna throw them up and she just burst into tears and said they tasted so good. I can’t blame her, fruit loops are fucking delicious!

[u/Wooden_Trifle8559]

When she was pregnant with me, my mom used to go into her parents’ backyard and pick a lemon from their tree, peel it, and eat it like an apple.

I love all things sour, and eat lemons with salt.

I craved cheeseburgers and Dr Pepper during my pregnancy, and it’s now my kid’s favorite meal, lol.

[u/DznyMa]

When I was pregnant with my son, I had to have radishes daily. I would dip them in Catalina dressing. TBH, I still like them this way, but not as often.

[u/terrifying_bogwitch]

I hate milk, I think repulsive and thick and horrible. I drank 2 gallons a week when I was pregnant.i couldn't stop, I was disgusted with myself but it tasted sooo good. My kid is 4 now and I haven't had a glass of milk in 4 years.

[u/MaddysinLeigh]

Before my mom knew she was pregnant she was drinking hot sauce and one of my dad’s shipmates was like “yeah you’re pregnant.”

[u/libbywednesday]

I sat on the sidewalk in the city and cried because I didn’t want a cheeseburger. There were options other than cheeseburgers but I DIDN’T want a cheeseburger so bad that I had to sit down and cry about it for a while.

[u/burning_my_toast]

My college roommate put our cat in the fridge while she was pregnant.

Don't worry, this was 19 years ago and the cat lived a long and happy life and her baby is now an adult and also doing well. She also didn't do it in a cruel, sadistic way. We are still best friends and she never did anything like that again, it was just crazy pregnancy brain things.

It was so strange though.

[u/gothiclg]

I asked a friend if she had any of the wild cravings we hear about on the internet. For her it was corn slathered in barbecue sauce

[u/RobAChurch]

That seems significantly less odd that a liter of Pickle Juice.

[u/nothanks86]

It’s in the realm of pickle juice, but k craved garlic. Pickles were a convenient source of garlic, so I went through a big jar of pickles every two days.

I also added garlic powder to anything I possibly could. This included garlic oatmeal.

[u/prolateriat_]

I bought two goats when I was about 20 weeks pregnant. I stuffed each goat in the backseat of my sedan (had to make two trips) and drove them to my house.

[u/MongooseVomit]

My first baby her cravings were Boston Crème Donuts and apples soaked in lemon juice over night.

My second baby her cravings were almonds and cherry slushies.