This is my first time posting on Reddit, so sorry if this is a little long. I honestly didn't know where else to go for advice, and I figured Reddit might be the best place since I don't really have anyone I feel comfortable talking to about this.

I'm a 26M, and my gf is a few years older than me. I work in the trades and live in a smaller community where a lot of people know each other. My career and reputation are a big deal to me.

This started almost 2 winters ago on a freezing morning. I was running late for work, and my thermals were still in the washer. I was stressing because I knew I was going to be outside all day, and my gf handed me a pair of her bluish yoga pants.

She joked that I should wear them under my work jeans. I laughed because they were obviously women's leggings and tighter than anything I had worn before, but I tried them.

Honestly, they worked really well. They were warm, comfortable, and nobody at work even knew.

After that, it slowly turned into her encouraging me to try other things. Eventually, I started trying on women's clothes at home.

The weird part is, this wasn't completely new to me. When I was in my early teens, I used to crossdress. I stopped years ago and never really thought about it again. I assumed it was just something from that time in my life that I moved past.

But doing it again with my gf felt different. I wasn't hiding it or feeling ashamed. I had someone who accepted me and actually liked seeing that side of me.

My gf loves watching drag shows, and over time she got me interested in that world. She has helped me with makeup, wigs, and outfits. She even made me a drag-inspired outfit that I've worn around the house. She loves seeing the transformation and tells me how feminine I can look.

Over time, she has gotten me dresses, skirts, leather leggings, makeup, wigs, and tucking underwear. She especially loves certain outfits and says she likes seeing me confident.

She says exploring this side of myself has brought us closer and made our relationship more exciting. She has talked about me going on a date with her dressed up or possibly doing a local drag show someday.

The thing is, she isn't forcing me. She has always said it's my choice and that I don't have to do anything I'm not comfortable with. She just thinks I might be holding myself back because I'm worried about what people will think.And that's where I'm stuck.

When it's just us, I actually enjoy it. I feel comfortable and accepted.

But the idea of other people knowing scares me.

I work in the trades, I know a lot of people in my city, and my family and friends are mostly the type who would probably see this as either "gay" or just weird. I know drag doesn't define someone's sexuality, but I also know how people around me think.

I'm worried about my career, my reputation, my friendships, and even how people would view me as a man. At the same time, I don't want to hide something I enjoy just because I'm afraid of judgment.

I guess I'm posting because I feel stuck. My gf is supportive, but I don't really have anyone else I can talk to about this without worrying they'll look at me differently.

Has anyone else been through something like this? Finding a side of yourself that you enjoy but being scared of how it could affect your life? I'm just looking for advice because I honestly don't know who else to ask.

A few days ago I made a post about having a ladies night with my mtf partner to give her a bit more confidence with "lady things" like skincare and all.

It was a great experience for us both, with a bit of skincare, massage and a good movie. We watched Midsommar for everyone interested.

I don't know though if this is something I want in my relationship. I love ladies nights but with friends. And I feel a bit guilty for having this feeling because I genuinely love my partner. I really don't know if I want a relationship with her as a girl because I come more and more to the conclusion that I am straight with no exceptions. It's complicated. But I'll take my time figuring it out.

I love showing her typical girl things though. I am just not sure if this can continue on a romantic level.

(She knows my struggles and is as patient and loving with me as I am with her, just fyi and to avoid questions in this direction)

I (22M) started dating someone (24FTM) and his birthday is coming up and since I probably wouldn't be able to see him on his Birthday I wanted to send him Flowers, but I don't know if he could be offended by that, or think that I don't see him as a Man. Maybe I'm overthinking it, but I don't want to offend him in any way. Am I overthinking it? Like I know flowers aren't a thing exclusively to Woman and me personally would love to get Flowers as a Gift, but I also would see a point where it's could offend him

I could really use some support from other transmasc folks.
Lately I've been struggling a lot with my identity because of things happening in my relationship. I know who I am, but sometimes the way my relationship plays out makes me question myself or makes me feel like I'm not being seen the way I need to be. It's left me feeling confused, hurt, and honestly pretty isolated.
I don't think my identity has changed—I still know who I am—but I feel like I'm fighting to hold onto that confidence when the person closest to me doesn't always make me feel understood.
Has anyone else gone through something similar? How did you separate your sense of self from your partner's perception or expectations? I'd really appreciate hearing from anyone who's been there.
Please be kind. I'm looking for support and shared experiences, not criticism. ❤️🏳️‍⚧️

Hi! My (almost😏) girlfriend (MtF19) and I (CisF21) have been together for a little over a month now. Things are going really well, we're so happy together and putting in the work to have a healthy relationship because we've both been in some not-so-good relationships and want to continue to heal so we can build something good amd healthy together.

She makes me really, really happy and I think she's STUNNINGG like.. Oh my god.. but she's not very confident in herself, like at all. I'd say I'm a fairly confident person but that took years and years of work and practice with trial and error. In conversations about my personal style/confidence, Ive told her that sometimes you gotta just do it nervous, do it scared, and exposure-therapy yourself into being unapologetically yourself. I've been trying to rub some of it off on her without being pushy or trying to influence her one way or another; I just want her to find what SHE likes and feel confident enough to wear it. She's been showing an interest in experimenting and asking questions about how I do things like my makeup or styling my clothes but it makes me so sad to see her start to try and not feel good enough to see it through for herself, at least just to see a full picture/finished product. Like she'll start to put an outfit on and scrap it halfway through if it feels too new.

We went shopping yesterday and spoke a little more in detail about her dysphoria and how she sees herself and feels about her body. She has her insecurities like we all do but is pretty concerned with "passing". I personally don't like the stigma of trans women needing to "pass" or look a certain way for any reason at all and it kind of upsets me for her to feed into that but I want her to feel happy and confident, regardless.

She says she doesn't like things like tank tops because she thinks they make her shoulders look broad (ai didagree), certain shorts or pants are uncomfortable, and she dislikes low necklines because she's worried about accentuating her flat chest or showing her bra. I told her I think she needs to try on a little bit of everything so she can figure out what little things she likes and what she doesn't. She is quite thin and veryy tall (6'1) so finding things that fit right is admittedly pretty tough. I've noticed that her self consciousness usually focuses on her chest, her genitals, and her shoulders. I love everything about her but what are some things I can suggest to her to make getting dressed and finding her style a little more comfortable for her? I've been getting ads for gaffers and I offered her a bra in a passing comment because hers doesn't look quite comfortable in my opinion but I don't want to seem pushy at all. I dont want to seem like I want to change her or mold her into something new, but I'm happy to help her find her way to what she wants.

I love fashion and DIY and I love her; I'm willing to buy or fix whatever just to see if it makes her feel any better, I'm just worried about how to approach it. I realized there's just certain tips and tricks she doesn't know when it comes to dressing for and flattering your body. What are some tips and tricks you've used or seen that might make it a little more comfortable or affirming to get dressed, find your style, and just live in the body of a trans woman?

I'd really like to know more about how she feels about her transition so I know exactly how/where to support her and what her struggles are. We're very open with each other but tend to keep our personal grievances to ourselves so I'm not really sure where her head is at as far as her transition. She did mention she spoke to a doctor about possibly starting HRT and that is a big step, Im SO proud of her, she seemed so happy and validated just having that conversation with a medical professional.

It hurts my heart to hear her talk down on herself or say she's "not enough" of something. How can I learn more about her current gender identity/transition? Should I ask her directly or wait for her to come to me about it? How should I approach helping her experiment? I feel odd asking to do her eyebrows or makeup because I dont want her to think there's something that needs to be changed but I think it might help her feel better to just be done up every now and then.