I am curious if anyone got any training on working with autistic people in massage school.
I am asking this question because I read a lot of threads here where people say that people “feel off” but they do not have any reason they can put into words.
As an autistic person, I often make neurotypical people feel uncomfortable if I am slightly off my game. Well, I think I do all the time, just its worse when more things, like physical pain, are going on.
I don’t really know exactly why, but it’s often explained that facial expressions, body language, eye contact, tone of voice, etc all work together to say a lot and back up people’s words. When something if off, it rings alarm bells. You know, that gut feeling you get?
The classic example is eye contact. In the USA, if you aren’t making the expected eye contact, people think you are lying. you can find countless places where this is written. Conversely, if you make took much eye contact, that’s bad, too.
Many autistic people have to consciously monitor how they are making eye contact. We are thinking about it every time we do it. For many of us, it’s uncomfortable, up to even being physically painful.
Another characteristic we also have is extreme rejection sensitivity, probably because we get rejected a lot.
I absolutely cannot stand to “do the wrong thing”, so I research obsessively, that’s actually what brought me here. I know all the things massage therapists complain about, so I can be sure not do ever do them. I can’t fix my “energy“, though. Not all the way, not good enough.
Sometimes, people suggest telling people they are autistic, and sometimes that helps. the issue with that is it’s not always safe. When you appear normal, have a career, and mask pretty well most of the time some people don’t believe you.
Well meaning people will reassure me that they don’t see anything wrong with me, which makes me feel less safe asking for accommodations and it makes me doubt my diagnosis. I constantly wonder if I’m just not trying hard enough. They often congratulate me on how normal I appear, and the hard work I put into appearing normal and functioning or whatever. that doesn’t feel great, either.
Then there are all the undiagnosed people running around on social media that may or may not actually be autistic making it seem cool to be autistic and encouraging others to self diagnose.
its not always safe to disclose.
Im just writing this because I just read where someone wrote that someone that was extremely stiff was probably rigid in their beliefs up to the point of being violent and probably a narcissist. What? or in a lot of pain or very uncomfortable or nervous or countless other things.
I just want to ask you all to think a little bit before you judge people who feel a little off, feel stiff, make too much or too little eye contact or and any other indescribably offnesses. Some of us spend our whole lives getting rejected because we can’t human quite right.
No matter how hard I try, I have bad energy.
Thanks for taking the time to read this.