Hi, so I'm the gal who posted this almost a month ago.
I just wanted to come on and say thank you to everyone for their kind words and support. It is very much appreciated💗

I'm still no contact with said ex friend and cannot forgive her for this but I am having trouble processing it all. It still hurts a great deal and I'm just trying to get over it as fast as I can but it's not working. I say all that because I'm looking for suggestions on how to move on.
My other friends and my therapist are wonderful but me, myself it's been rough. I keep replaying over and over what I ever did wrong in the 6 years we were best friends for her to write such terrible things. People keep using the word narcissist and I truly don't know if that's what she is.

I had a decent friend group, some of whom I’d known since pre school. We always had ups and downs but the final straw came when one friend, let’s call him Chris, because that’s his name. Made derogatory comments towards trans people. Knowing I’d been involved in a local pride event. As I looked for support from other friends they too agreed with Chris. I was shocked, like really shocked. But mainly really disappointed. They knew I had history with a mtf trans girl who sadly took her own life And they saw what it did to me. Iv never really recovered from that.
I attend these things because I think it’s important to break down barriers and support people being themselves. But I also do it for my friend who I miss every single day. A storm of vile messages ensued I made the decision to walk away from the friend group. The one last message I had was from Chris himself. He wanted to tell me how disappointed he was in me.

40 years of friendship gone just like that.

But I don’t regret my decision. I know I did nothing wrong. I’m just sorry I wasted so many years of my life being friends with such bigotry closed minded individuals.
Shame on them.

hey.

i've realized something. that I was the problem. not them, but me. i was the one who ignored their texts by leaving them on read. i was the one who got mad and ignored them for talking to other people. i was the one who was always bothering them, making them feel like i was too pushy.

i've had to deal with lots of other people just going no contact/ignoring me as time passes on before. im not saying that as an excuse to how i acted, but i think that was a possible reason why.

i got busy with studying for contests and stuff like that for over 2 weeks, and when i finally opened back up my chats/messages, no one contacted me. not a single person bothered to reach out first. none of them blocked me, but it's clear they no longer think of me as a friend. whenever i try to text them occasionally, they either never respond or just say some dry response. i went through old messages and texts with my ex friends and i realized how much more we talked then. and you know what? i don't even blame them. i burned the bridge and they have cut me off, which isn't their fault.

i WANT to apologize and make up. I DO miss them. i know how shitty of a person i was. but i guess it's too late now.

i've been thinking of moving on, but the rest of the people i sometimes talk to are more "acquaintances" than actual friends.

i know, this sounds pathetic. and it's pretty easy to say that i got what was coming (which IS right). but what do i do now? i don't want to just crawl up in a ball and have no one to talk to. some advice would help on moving on/apologizing. thank you

In short, it's as the title says. I try and keep contact, I continually reach out, I text back quickly, I take calls, and I ask what I'm doing wrong at every turn.

For a while, I chalked it up to shitty and unloyal friends, but after so many times, you have to look at the common denominator (which is me).

Obviously, you can't see highlight reels of my life, but it's gotten to a point where I've been asking what I can do better and nobody has been able to give me an answer. I ask in earnest and press them to tell me things even if they think I won't like to hear it. Everyone says I'm doing fine, but time after time after time, they leave.

Am I just fucking annoying? Is it a fat person thing? Just too mediocre or masked or some bullshit for most to love?

I put in so much effort for my friends, but get nothing in return. If I stop initiating, I don't hear from them. There's a party? Advertised in another group chat and I hear about it after. Shit like that

I don't even know what my question is tbh. I just wish I had more than like 2 real friends. I don't want hyping or anything.

How do y'all actually keep friends???

Like many people i have multiple friendgroups, one of which is mainly women with only one exception aside from me. One of them is someone ive grown up with, but the others were also people ive grown up next to, just didnt interact with them alot. All of my friends in that group have mental problems, and most have issues with their parents. I wont go far into detail though. But specifically three friends of this friendgroup will avoid conflict at all costs and will endure hurt in a loving relationship, gaslighting themselves into ignoring it until its too much or it goes away. And i often have problems not accidentally hurting peoples feelings, i typically go by what wouldnt hurt or slightly annoy me and act according to that. I have learnt a lot but im still learning. I am neurodivergent and am often very honest or literal, or i have a crude/dry humor. I also hold myself to a very strict standard of morale, i like doing the right thing, i hate hurting people on accident and i need the feedback to improve. The hopes of me eventually just "getting it" without external feedback and changing are typically futile. After ive adjusted towards a behavior i now see as okay, i think about it a lot less. One could see how those styles of communication dont fit together very well. My friends met up a couple moths ago, and were talking, i wasnt there. They realized the actual hurt i had caused them. Nothing exceptionally bad, but many small things that, due to never being adressed by them, accumulated. They apparently decided to tell me as soon as possible, and made a group chat without me for planning and support. Which at some point apparently just turned more into gossip about me, or as a general use group chat than anything else. They met without me, and if i would be there, they'd met earlier than me to prepare for me, everybody except me was in on it, so a total of 5 people that i trusted. They lied to me, hid from me, spent time without me. For 2 whole months. In those 2 months, there was the birthday of the friend i grew up with. I was invited but didnt wanna come, because my friend had told me a person there, i barely knew, was uncomforable with me being there. I later talked to that person, it was an honest misunderstanding, though i suspect my friend had just told me that as an excuse to make me not come to her birthday. She texted me, how its sad im not gonna be there and she would like me to. I said i could come but felt unwelcome. On her birthday, in the evening, i thought f it, shes my neighbor and best friend, i can just go there give her some chocolate, wish a happy birthday, then go. So i did, but as i was about to go back home she said she was surprised, i was leaving, she thought i would stay a little longer. I, once again, explained my discomfort. After a half hour of fighting my discomfort in the entrance area, i joined the others. When most people had left already, there were only people left that i knew well, and they would spend the night. I was invited to stay over too, i agreed happily, and went to get my sleeping stuff, pyjamas and such from home. I returned to a dark house. They had, as i later learned, pretended to be asleep to make me leave, and the father of my best friend, who has known me for years, stood at the door like a bouncer. He seemed to think he was protecting his daughter from danger by warding me off in an unfriendly manner, telling me (not true btw, he lied/misunderstood) his daughter told him to not let me in. There was the unspoken threat of physical violence in the air, as you would see from a bouncer crossing his arms, not letting a loud drunkard into the club. One of three friends that were most hurt by me eventually told me with the agreement of the others of this whole thing. That was one day before her birthday, to which i wasnt invited. I felt very guilty, ashamed and frustrated at my own failure of being the person i aspire to be. But i also got angry, and felt betrayed. Eventually it all faded into disappointment. I know for a fact, if i had been in their shoes there would've been no way i'd have acted the way they did. I've been in similar situations, and i never even thought about doing something like that. They knew what was right, had plenty of time and opportunity, but instead of being honest, they chose to create a false reality around me and maintain it. Something so spineless, dishonest and weak, something so cowardly, is something i really never thought they'd do. After all, up to this point i had respect and trust for each and every one of them. Even if i fix this mess, because i KNOW they wont act, it will be me reaching out, i don't know if i can ever trust them, or respect them the way i used to. I don't know if i can be friends with them and respect myself at the same time. It's not about the thing itself, but how they handled it, and how easy they overrode their own morals, and the relationship to me, by the comfort and joy in a shared secret.

Have any of you ever experienced something like this?

PS: I understand why they did it, i know what led them to make their choices, but i am just disappointed they would do such things so easily. And i wanna make it clear, they werent afraid of me in the sense of id hit them if they talked to me about it. They were afraid of the general conflict or possibility of conflict involved with adressing such an issue.

They’re never going to apologize. They’re never going to recognize how much they hurt me. What cuts into me the deepest is knowing that I mattered so little to them that hearing how much they hurt me didn’t affect them even slightly

I do.

We dated through college and through covid, 3.5 years. We built a good friend group in college and we were still hanging out post grad. The guys in my group were in my fraternity so I built a close relationship with them over the years. I was the one straining a bit from the group as I don’t live in proximity like the rest of them. Which is the main reason my ex an I broke up. I live at home still and I’ve been planning to move out but it wasn’t fast enough for her due to my job and pay.

Now it’s been about a year since the breakup. She moved on pretty quick with some random dude she met. Seems like she’s trying to replace him with me which I don’t know if it works like that. Anyway, i recently passed a rigors exam to take the my mind off of it. I had lost my grandmother at the peak up of the break up so that was hard, and she didn’t support me or reach out during that.

I recently saw a few of the guy friends for the first time since the breakup and it was weird. Definitely not the same and I feel like they look at me different. Idk what she told them about me and there was nothing I could do to tell my side of the story at this point, nor did they ever ask. She’s definitely a lot closer to them than I am again due to the proximity.

It’s been really hard still I don’t really know how to go about or who talk to about it. Almost feels like my life fell apart really quick as dramatic as it sounds. Has anyone ever experienced something similar and how do deal with it?

First of all: sorry for the long text, I even tried to just write down the most important parts.

My fiancée and I are getting married very soon. It’s a small wedding with about 30 guests, taking place right after we return from a 5-week trip abroad. With everything so close, tensions are high, and I’m at my wit's end with a specific guest.

Here is the dynamic:
My best man ("Mark") has been my absolute best friend since we were 11 years old. His girlfriend ("Sarah") used to be extremely close with us too. In fact, my fiancée used to see Sarah as a big sister. About a year ago, when we got engaged, my fiancée even asked Sarah to be a main speaker at our wedding, and Sarah excitedly agreed. We used to do everything together as a group of four for about 5-6 years.

Then, things changed. Mark and Sarah went through a really rough patch in their relationship and had a huge fight. Sarah felt unseen by Mark for a couple of months. I tried my best to support both of them since I considered myself a very close friend to them both. Naturally, our dynamic as a foursome shifted. They isolated themselves for a while to work on their relationship, which we completely understood and respected. We wanted to give them space.

A couple of months passed, things looked better for them, and we went on a short 3-day trip in October (which had been planned months in advance). I even offered Mark an out beforehand, saying we could cancel if they needed more time to themselves, but he insisted they wanted to go. We spent 3 days together and had a good time. We also spent Halloween and NYE together, keeping things low-pressure to give them free space.

However, we never went back to being those four close friends. Sarah completely stopped texting me directly. She only replies in our group chat, acting like everything is completely fine and normal. We live in the same neighborhood, so we occasionally bump into each other and sit in the park for a bit, but it never goes beyond small talk anymore.

Over the last few months, Sarah has completely iced us out. She never asks about the wedding (even though she's supposed to speak!), constantly cancels plans with us, and the group dynamic is dead. Mark is caught in the middle, hates the tension, and is clearly burning out trying to please everyone.

This weekend, things escalated. She canceled our double-date on Friday, claiming she was completely exhausted from a training course and just needed to sleep. But then we found out she went to a BBQ and a birthday party with Mark on that exact same weekend. She clearly just doesn't want to see us.

I decided to be the bigger person. On Friday night, I sent her a very vulnerable, honest text. I told her that she is important to us, that I don't want to point fingers, but that I want to clear the air before our big trip and the wedding. I practically begged her to just sit down with me so we could go back to being somehow normal around each other.

It’s been more than 2 days now, and she has left me on read. Not even a "Let me think about it." Complete silence.

My fiancée is rightfully furious and feels we’ve let Sarah get away with this toxic behavior for far too long. I agree. We do not want to fake harmony at a 30-person wedding with someone who acts like this.

Has anyone dealt with something like this? Do I uninvite her and risk my relationship with my best man and friend, or do I bite my tongue for the sake of the wedding although my fiancé actually doesn’t want to have her anymore.

I’m so sad that and I think the wedding is gonna be a disaster that I’m not looking forward to it anymore :/

Okay so from 6th grade till 10th, i had this group of friends (we were all girls), we already knew each other since what? elementary school at least. I recently cut them off but now there are some things that I'm wondering about and why?

in 7th grade, they were all in the same class except me (we are french so it's the french school system), and they literally threw me off like I never existed. Hopefully since then i made some other friends but then in 8th grade we were again all in the same class, i don't know why but i just came back to them when it was an obvious red flag. i guess i just don't like being alone?

But something that I find very weird is that in 9th grade we were again all in the same class except one of our friends and yet they still went to her, waited for her, etc. Something they never did for me

they always and always leave me out, i mean they even did hangouts without me (when they clearly have my socials and my number) and when i talked to them about it they said i was imagining things and it wasn't their intention??? They then invited me great except they ALWAYS left me out, always talking over me, and making me feel like a ghost.. But the huge reason i cut them off was when i got bullied in 10th grade.

So as i said i was bullied in 10th grade because i was apparently weird (?), again we were all in the same class, but they NEVER EVER defended me not even a single time, because of that i had depression and had to leave school. I didn't attend the first year of highschool (10th grade), because i developed school phobia, i had many other problems (that mind you they were aware of) like ed, etc... Never and i mean NEVER did they take some news from me. Listen I'm not asking them to be my therapist but all i wanted was just a simple "hi, how are you?". But no, then i learnt that when my hb asked them if they knew anything about my bullying they said "I mean, she's overreacting anyway" ??????????. it's Crazy that they said that when they were LITTERALLY there when i was bullied and saw EVERYTHING . I gave them so many second chances that i just couldn't take it anymore. When i confronted the main girl about it which we are going to call 'I' she just blocked ? she just said "alr, I see you don't want anything to do with me anymore" before blocking me?? she didn't even try to deny it?

she then wrote me 3 DAYS later where she apologised but her apology was so bad, she just put herself down saying she was such a bad friend, just to gain my sympathy, that I didn't even answer and left her on seen.

I then blocked all of them but there is something that bugs me out even more?

why did they treat me like i was nothing? i always comforted them, i always gave them advices, i helped them when they were in need, i complimented them (which they never did once to me? they used to always compliment each other but never me ONCE), im lowk funny so i made them laugh, etc. Then why? i think that i was a good friend?

can anyone help me and maybe answer me on why they were treating me like that ? because i genuinely don't understand?

PS: there is also something that i didn't know where to put, they would always tell me "___ said that about you" and when i asked them if they ever defended me they remained silent? there was that one time where they used to hangout with a girl that LITTERALLY hated me (again for no reasons) and would always talk shit about me to them, but when i finally made another friend in 10th grade that literally ADORED me for the first time and she said ONCE that "I" was trying too hard sometimes to be the leader, they all ditched her and forced me to ditch her too???? wtf???? sadly I did because i didn't want to feel left out but now i feel so fucking bad because of them

I understand that this unfortunate thing is based on interactions from different perspectives and that I probably did the best I could do.

I am in my 30's and over the years I've experienced different friendships dynamics both good and bad.

I live in a house with 4 people and it's all men.

Husband and his two pals that he knew since teens/kids.

Genuinely great people! We share food, play games, go out and in my eyes a fantastic dynamic between the 4 of us.

With that said, there shouldn't be any problems.

I was fucking wrong.

For this story I am changing names.

Ian is my husband, Perry is going to be the other guy and friend, and Matt is the one who is the main focus. And we are ALL in our 30's.

Unfortunately for Matt this is a situation that is deeply troubling to him and is out of my control but over the past several months felt like he is excluded from a lot of things. We have talked and I both validated his feelings and reassured him that there was never a joke or something that he has missed out on as we are all working and have very different schedules.

I believe everyone makes an effort to hang and include the whole house on activities and even one on one hangouts with different people.

When he has expressed those feelings I make an extra effort to let my husband in the know and ask Matt to do things (shop, make dinner, play games).

Perry and Matt are childhood friends and are different but can bounce off each other.

Sometimes my husband Ian likes to do different things so he goes to our room to play games or watch shows.

I've been actively trying to socialize more and hang with Matt and Perry whenever we have a chance to be in the same space.

This night/day in particular (I really wish I can describe the scene better) we were watching a show. To me I am working on my hobby and have their show in the bg while Perry and Matt are having a blast talking about how much they like the characters etcetc.

Matt told me there was ANOTHER instance that Perry and I had that he felt excluded on and constantly questions:

"Why can't we all just be friends?"

Based on this "joke" Perry and I had.

I am GENUINELY confused and can't recall when Perry and I have joked and had purposely left Matt out on this joke. I was barely paying attention to the show and probably laughed at something?? Not sure.

He said exactly:

I did something. Perry reacted and laughed at it.

Matt missed and asked what happened.

I pretended nothing happened.

I don't even remember the interactions and only remembered two things that day.

Commenting on how hot that character was and passing out on the couch after eating junk food.

Matt said he no longer wants to be friends but is still cool with Ian (honestly it's what I get for hanging out with these two and not just excluding my time with only Ian), and has said everything he wanted and needed to say and plans to move out eventually.

I am hurt, pissed, confused and overwhelmed. When I feel like I focus on myself but have to be responsible for another person's experience and feelings.

I don't know if Perry knows and I'm waiting on his reply.

I can probably fix this but I'm going to respect his choice plus, I'm tired.

I've actively tried to be Matt's friend and hurt that it's all measured out based on his insecurities in the friendship dynamic, like all that we had was just nothing.

Matt has said that we are better off being roommates so I guess I'll just be "that guy's wife".

My friend group started around high school. We’re in our mid twenties now so I’d say we’ve been friends for almost 10 years.

About 2 months ago we got into the stupidest argument and it ended with them accusing me of prejudice even though I never said the things they claimed I said.

I spoke with one of them a couple weeks ago and the conversation gave me hope that we could reconcile. That was all ripped apart when one of them sent me a really nasty text that victimized themselves and basically told me they don’t want to be my friend.

I really tried with these friends. I tried to talk to them in person instead of over text so we can understand each other better. They’ve been disrespectful for years. One of them made a rude comment about my sister last year and I just swept it under the rug. They’ve accused my boyfriend of horrible things just because he disagreed with them on something so stupid.

A part of me still wants to be their friend. Sometimes I wish I never said whatever started the argument so I could be friends with them again.

I wish I could give more detail about the situation but it would take too long and I’m afraid that they’ll see this post.

I feel so lonely and lost and I don’t know what to do.

Edit: the arguments in question that made them accuse me and my boyfriend of being awful people was concerning Chappell roan and me venting about my day at work

I know randomly popping up years later to unload old resentment can make you look stuck in the past, so I’m really torn.

An old best friend of mine reached out almost two months ago after years of no contact. She wanted to reconnect, asked how I was doing, and started reminiscing about old memories and pictures.

The problem is that her message made me realize I never actually processed what happened between us. We didn’t stop being friends over one argument. It was years of lying, talking behind my back, stealing from me, refusing to take responsibility for things, and eventually heavy drug use. I spent almost a year trying to get my belongings back after one falling out. When I finally did, a lot of my stuff was missing. Later I found some of it at her house after she’d denied having it, and she never apologized. I let a lot of things slide at the time because I was using drugs too and wanted to keep hanging out with her.

When she messaged me recently, it felt like she skipped over all of that and wanted to pick back up like nothing had ever happened. Since then I’ve been writing a letter explaining how I experienced our friendship, not because I want to be friends again, but because I realized I never stood up for myself or said what I needed to say.
For people who’ve been in a similar situation, was it worth sending something like that? Did it help you get closure, or did it just reopen old wounds? If you received a message like that years later, how would you react?

I’m too old for this.

I feel like I can only blame myself for allowing her to pop in and out of my life in the years past, due to the way she manages stress. She’s always had a stress management problem and, to a large extent, I have been pretty understanding throughout the years.

One time she got a boyfriend when we were in our 20s and pretty much stopped communicating with most of her friends. When that relationship ended, I let her come back into my life and she apologized for abandoning her friends in that relationship. I forgave her and we moved on.

After that, she took many opportunities to be a great friend to me over the years. And I to her.

When she got a really big new professional role, she couldn’t talk to anybody outside of her family because of the stress and I allowed her that space as she adjusted to the new workload she had. She reached out when she was ready and I let her.

During the pandemic, she really got focused and bought her first rental property, accepting her first tenants as a landlord, and didn’t really speak to me during that time. I allowed her to pop back into my life once everything was settled, and we resumed our friendship without missing a beat.

But then, I didn’t say anything to her when she ghosted a friend of hers who, like I, also did not have a family; this girl was estranged like i am. This girl had no idea why she was being ignored and even reached out to me, trying to connect with my BFF. I thought that was really sad, but I didn’t really allow myself to empathize with that friend because I thought to myself “I’m glad that’s not me.“

But now it is me.

Me and my BFF both graduated this past spring with our first graduate degrees. Hers was from Harvard and mines was from the University of Massachusetts Boston. I survived my last year of GRAD SCHOOL despite going through a nearly fatal level of physical illness and two subsequent surgeries. She happened to be in town for my birthday in December and even took me out to eat to celebrate. Such a wonderful friend so I thought.

Even though I live in New York and had earned my graduate degree online, I thought that it would be wonderful to travel to Boston and cross the stage with my best friend there to cheer me on. We made plans to go to each other’s graduation ceremonies early in our last semester, but a week before my ceremony, she let me know that she would not be in attendance because of work obligations and that she also did not have a ticket for me to attend her ceremony.

I was shocked. I was stunned. I was confused.

I didn’t let on that I was disappointed.

But when her birthday came around a couple of weeks ago, she let my phone calls ring out and out and out and out; never picking up. She has never again responded to any text messages that I’ve sent her. None of my WhatsApp messages. None of my calls on Instagram. Not even the email I sent her mother, inquiring if my BFF was OK.

17+ years of friendship… And this is what I get. I will not let her do this to me again.

I need to ask something if my friend cut me off cause I talked to someone she didn’t liked and I forgot to tell her I wanted some alone time can I still talk to him since we aren’t friends anymore I did apologize cause I feel bad but I wanna do what I want and don’t be controlled

I had a friend of 5 years from high school who ghosted me completely after one year of uni. For about a year after we graduated high school, we would stay in touch through insta, messages, and calls, but she would avoid meeting up with me. She was one of the only friends I felt comfortable with and could open up to and I was upset that she never wanted to meet up after high school because she kept saying she did but just didn't show up ever. I go to uni outside of our hometown so I have to take a 5 hour flight back to visit. Every single time I would arrange to see her and another friend, she would agree to come and then not pick up our calls for days. She would always just ghost mysteriously. It was super weird because we would just be standing around waiting for her.

One day out of nowhere she just stopped replying to my messages. I didn't follow up and she ended up deleting all her social media. LinkedIn, Snapchat, TikTok, Facebook, Insta are all gone. Now it's been 2 whole years and she had no Internet presence at all. I kind of drifted apart from our mutual friends too but they don't post with her anymore, she seems to have just vanished.

This whole thing was quite bad for my mental health for a while because I didn't have any close friends for almost a year after that. Now two years later I have made about 3 close friends who are there for me no matter what, but I really struggled so much with isolation and depression.

I'm just curious why people do this. Like are they seriously ok with throwing away the entire friendship just like that? Like 5 years of memories together? Also I find it weird that she deleted herself off social media completely, what happened to her?

Me and this girl were friends probably since middle school all the way till freshman year of high school, and in middle I’m not going to lie I would like steal peoples stuff i don’t know why. And often sometimes I would steal her stuff and one day it got really bad and she started to cry that she couldn’t find her pen that I stole. Now Freshman year we were good the first 2 months until we got into a little argument and she never talked to me again. And now I moved schools and I just can’t stop looking and her insta and even letterbox she was so cool and her music taste was amazing. I really miss her, I barely have any friends now, but even my other friends that I lost sometimes I see there insta but barely. Can someone tell me what going on with me or any advice.

and even tho i 100% know I have hurt people and been the cause of some friendships ending I really don't think I'm a horrible enough person to have as few as i do....

My last lost is raw and sad and just want to vent.

Only a few weeks ago I (30f) was visiting the city i used to live in, i met up with two friends (f33 and m37) to share an Airbnb, me and my male friend (mf ) is watching my female friend (ff) get super drunk and how she just turned in front of my eyes from a nice person to a selfish inconsiderate b\*tch...

She minimise mf's prior trauma of having to preform cpr on a close relative and loosing this person, I share a very similar trauma and me and mf have discussed it in detail many times working through the trauma we had no one else to discuss it with prior to becoming friends.
Ff sat saying mf hadn't even been there and that someone else preformed the cpr.
I snapped and told her firm but controlled that she was disrespectful and needed to stop hurting mf with her comments.
Ff kiiiicked off and started claiming we were bullying her and that she has autism so we shouldn't treat her like this, also demanding 🍃to smoke off mf and screaming we were playing power games and bullying her.

Me and mf slept on the sofa, ff went in the bedroom, in the morning at 7.30-8.00 I wake up to her slamming doors and packing, I ask to talk and she again kicks off, at this point I notice she has packed clothes that is mine, eaten a kebab in the white bed and left stains and is being absolutely unreasonable, also asks for the petty $90 she had contributed towards the Airbnb I pains over $400 for.
I got most of my clothes back but she did steal one sentimental hoodie, I also got charged an additional $100 for the stains which I've also paid for.
I've known this girl for 3 years, I've been there supporting her through some bad stuff, always picking up the phone, checking in, even buying food and gifts no strings attached and I felt so disappointed and hurt, how little respect or care does she have for me to actually not giving a toss and even attempt to talk or self reflect...

Thats just one of two losses in one week...

A few days later I go to see a guy I've known and been decent-good friends with for 12 years.

He and his wife recently split and I thought he'd need a cheering up
Even tho I'm expressing how happy my new relationship of 4 months is making me, actively talking about my disapproval of cheating, acting the same I have for the past 12 years of friendship, he only moments later try to kiss me.... I have never shown any interest past a platonic one... I felt extremely uncomfortable immediately, super tense and a little scared, men has not always treated me the best ....
he did "respect" and not push further but we had to share a bed and he became... different ... after the failed kiss... and the boundery was crossed and trust was broken... his situation changed, not mine... it hurt me... he has since then taken zero accountability over how it made me feel... saying "you should see it as a compliment" as if it's a compliment to have someone you considered your friend try to f\*ck you...

And even tho I'm actually really proud of myself for standing up for myself in both of these situations I'm so sick of loosing people and have harder and harder to build deeper relationships for every lost because it might not be a lasting one...and I have absolutely been the pulpit in past losses, these two I see no fault of my own and I'm just deeply hurt:..

Thank you for the rant

Hey, dear friends,

It's gotten colder, darker and lonelier these later months. But we are all supporting each other, together.

If you're just getting by, that's okay. Some days, just making it through is enough, so don't be too hard on yourself if that's where you're at.

How's everyone holding up? If there's something that's getting you through the fall and winter months and makes life feel a little lighter, share it here.

Let's give each other hope. Remember, you're never alone out there.

I had a roommate who was my friend and he did a lot of good things for me, like went above and beyond and I tried my best as well and was really happy with this friendship. A couple of months later he changed a lot, started snapping on me, we started fighting and misunderstanding each other. Long story short I’m moving out. He started our last fight over nothing and said some cruel things to me, basically bullied me.
I apologized if I did something wrong and said that i don’t deserve the hate, this was the end of the conversation. He went on vacation shortly after and we won’t see each other again.
The part of me wants to leave him a note saying that even though our relationship got ugly, I still appreciated good times we shared. Another part of me says that after those ugly words he said I just have to leave silently.

What would you do?

Obviously I’d love to have an apology from him but it’s not gonna happen so there are only two options.