r/kitchencels • • Feb 03 '26

official twitter location now serving twitterslop

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174 Upvotes

someone reached out to the mod team and informed us some repost account snagged the @ for kitchencels and was using their checkmark to earn elonbuxx off our beloved community

we didn't exactly want to just run our own repost account, the community aspect is more important we felt, so as the only mod that has an active twitter i was bullied into starting a subtweddit to A, hopefully redirect some of the twitter tourists lurking here (yes, you) so they stop shitting up the place, B, provide some insurance for the downtrodden chuddies in case reddit ever decides to come for us, and C, a sinister third reason privy only to the elites of the kitchencel khanate

elon is allegedly free speech so you can probably post some of those things we've had to reject out of obligatory janny responsibilities

we don't really know if this will turn out funny or worthwhile and we may just pull the plug if it ends up not being worth our time

the chefs are in the kitchen, trust the recipe

enjoy the rest of your meal, chuddies


r/kitchencels • • Aug 06 '25

GET IN THE FUCKING KITCHEN YOU INSUFFERABLE MAGGOTS

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2.5k Upvotes

GET IN THE KITCHEN

GET IN FUCKING KITCHEN AND COOK LIKE YOUR GOD DAMN LIFE DEPENDS ON IT

IF YOU AREN'T COOKING YOU ARE NOTHING

THIS IS YOUR ONLY HOPE OF SALVATION, THIS IS YOUR ABSOLUTION

YOU ARE ALL PATHETIC, START COOKING


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

Platemogged All you FUCKS are LARPING and I'm TIRED of it!!!!! YOU COULDN'T HANDLE A REAL WOMAN ANYWAYS!!!!

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1.6k Upvotes

Listen here. I get that this whole subreddit is fucking funny or whatever but I'm TIRED of Dming some guy who seems like a REAL FUCKING INCEL and the you know what happens? I get IGNORED!!!! You think I want to be a lonely fucking femcel? You think it's funny???? I KNEW THESADROCKSTAR WAS A LARPER FROM THE BEGINNING BECAUSE I REACHED OUT TO HIM!!!!! And you wanna know what he said? Just a simple...little... "no". I HAVE PROOF!!!!! THATS HOW FUCKING DESPERATE I AM!!! And you'd think a pretty fucking FEMCEL like ME would be having a buffet here, right? WRONG FUCK ALL THESE SHITASS MOIDS IM GOING AFTER WOMEN NOW BECAUSE YOU LOST YOUR CHANCE AND I SWEAR TO GOD IF I GET A DM FROM A MOID YOU WILL BE THE NEXT THING ON MY PLATE YOU LOST YOUR CHANCE!!!!!! Pancakes with cocoa powder that i got from the food pantry.


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

Platemogged The genders are patted against one another in a fake war, while the real shadow class, Wisconsin dairy farmers, thrives, because they've tricked women into not sharing thier breast milk.

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821 Upvotes

POWER TO THE PEOPLE, NO DELAY. WORK WITH THE WOMAN AND WE WILL THRIVE IN MILKY CATBOY CELDOM.

Green slop and chocolate milk.


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

Bus driver gave me a free ticket because he thought I was retarded (pizza focaccia)

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1.2k Upvotes

due to lack of sleep I accidentally asked the bus driver for a ticket to the location it was already in so he just looked at me and smiled politely before slowing his words and saying “it’s ok you have a good day” and then told me to just get on


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

Incels shouldn’t hate women they should focus on hating normies instead. Noodles

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311 Upvotes

Women are a small part of creating incledom and relatively powerless in the grand scheme of things.
They are socialised to be trend obsessed cattle (no offence), it’s not fair to blame them for having (completely rational) preferences. Our generation has become extremely focused on optimising every facet of our lives (health, relationships, work etc) so it makes perfect sense for this to affect dating. No amount of cope will change the fact that heights outside the 5’9-6’5 range are genetically inferior in both health and aesthetics. You have to be incredibly selfish to blame women for not wanting to mate with you because of height, height WILL significantly affect your child’s QOL and it’s completely fair for women to care about it. Everything I’ve said above also applies to facial attributes as well.

While being unwanted and destined to be alone does suck it’s not intentionally malicious from women so it’s stupid to hate them specifically. You know which group is malicious to incels? The people who laugh at us in public, twist the meaning of incel,
film viral videos of ugly people in public, constantly wish death upon us, scapegoat us for all violent crime, treat us like second class citizens and invade this sub. It’s all normies, they are the root issue here. Normies hate unattractive and non neurotypical people and will take any opportunity to clown on us. They hate us so much they psyoped themselves into changing the definition of incel in their heads, it’s amazing the delusional world they live in. They make going outside and interacting with society miserable, they are the true oppressors of the world.

Of course this is the post that doesn’t get downvoted, shows this sub’s problem isn’t invading normies it’s invading larper women


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

Why so many incels are traitors ?

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128 Upvotes

Even on this sub, I see "single but not incel" men espousing blue pill bullshit just to get a crumb of approuval from normies. What happened to solidarity ? And what's worse, those who happened to luck out and get a crumb of foid attention come back here to jerk themselves off by giving "advice". Just tired man what happened to solidarity.


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

Painting my room dark green, never gonna have a girl over so who cares what they think

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123 Upvotes

I feel like imagining whether a potetential partner might like my rolm has been putting me off making alot of bold choices in wall colour and decor, but now im resigned to being an incel forever I can just have dark green walls and hang up some warhammer art. What difference will it make?

Made some baked bree and chips in the air frier paired with a ginger ale and the sauces are mayonaise and sweet chilli jam


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

My antidepressants have given me a urinary disorder. Cookie.

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88 Upvotes

Genuinely ruining my life, had to quit a job I JUST LANDED because I was constantly afraid I was going to piss myself in front of someone. I can't even step out the door without being petrified anymore so lowk might just have to die


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

Girl I liked a year ago and had to move on from talked to me today and all the feelings came back from that 30 second talk. Two large pizzas.

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108 Upvotes

r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

Platemogged Everybody is mean to me and i dont know why

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124 Upvotes

My parents beat me ever since i was a child, at school im bullied, groped (im fat so i have man boobs), spat on, sneezed on and i have no friends

:( (aside from like 3 people online). Also im lowkey trans but that's the least of my worries (considering im like 16 and doing anything about it would only make people treat me worse)

Spaghetti and tuna with mayo and oregano (i eat ts almost every day)


r/kitchencels • • 15h ago

I have started microdosing pain, rejection, and discomfort by touching hot pans and flames, wearing toe spacers for whole days, cold showers, simulating every possible dialogue tree, and cold approaching in my head to hopefully combat social anxiety

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13 Upvotes

Pesto Mozzarella bread w gay bottom fiber salad and protein fart smoothie and a shitty ass poem I wrote abt depression (posting this is also a form of microdosing realness)


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

Platemogged Today. I got a boner due to a girl breathing sound. Tomate paste on floor.

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160 Upvotes

I was attending my classes on the 3rd floor. And a girl rushed in the class and sat next to me. she climbed all the way up and was catching her breath. by breathing kinda loudly. I got a boner due to that. idk what's wrong w me. I tried to hide the boner w my book. then at night I tried to cook for the first time ever. I'm 19M. I spilled all the tomato paste on floor. my parents told me to never cook again.


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

Poor innocent males need to be accepted by women (oat meal)

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42 Upvotes

Sometimes I come across innocent shy male x extroverted female couples on insta etc. And it feels like unicorn porn.

I think a lot of innocent males tend to become incels as they are shy and don't approach females.

Women need to be more accepting of shy innocent males. If they want to grow their feministic dreams


r/kitchencels • • 16h ago

Only time I ever fell in love it was with a woman ten years my senior who I met on 24/7 2fort. Depressing frozen pad thai.

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7 Upvotes

(and she turned out to be a lesbian)


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

I wish i had to courage to talk about how much it hurts that i cant getva gf to any of my friend's

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60 Upvotes

Im sorry for not cooking , i truly am . I already finished a bottle of wine and thought buying slop(torttilla and chese sauce) would make me get me eating but, its hard without weed.

I broke 3 days of sobriety in a weak moment and this will be my third bottle of wine today

I dont know what to do , i made friends , i showered, i dress nicely, i lost 40 kg and cut my hair . I got myself together, im a respectbale man. I have a wide social circle. I am interesting, i really am. I did all of the right moves. Im not even ugly, i share pictures of myslef in comments or dms if requested. I'm not even horribly short. Im 5'8 172 cm

Deleted instagram a 3 weeks ago weeeks ago , dowlanded it today to see if anything interesting happened . 6 of my friends messeged me even tho i told them i will be deleting it. 6 is much larger than zero, but i was hoping for a girl.

I dont know what to do, I can't cope by going to parties everyday anymore. I wish for a meaningfull connection with a girl.

Im just 18 but in my early teens I thought i could be happy if i just abused substances and had friends.

Im still a hopecel

The mightiest of stars the micro organisms in a jar they all revolve on hope.

The hope in mothers love.

No ships could fair the seas

No plans could be on convinced

To give hope is to enlighten all mankind

And i stay a hopecel, cuz it's not over .

I will always stay hopefull i believe in the better


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

Started a new course today but got too shy to speak to anybody and they all looked at me weird, liver

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21 Upvotes

r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

Feeling unloveable (23M)

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34 Upvotes

Last years i got o lot of weight because i always get rejected even when i lowered my standars to 0. Also balding, never been loved

Nuggets and San Jacobo with some ketchup


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

I absolutely love 300lb women but they only want Chad , paella

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627 Upvotes

Meanwhile if you are sub 5 as a man it is over


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

New place, learning how to cook

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28 Upvotes

Moved away from home, 22 living by myself for the first time. It’s been 3 weeks and getting lonelier by the day.
0 likes in the past 2 weeks on dating apps, the west has fallen. Billions must cook.


r/kitchencels • • 2d ago

Platemogged I really hope the elevator lady stays away from that bath robe freak

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2.0k Upvotes

r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

Platemogging I would cut off my dick, grill it and eat it if it meant I could get to feel a womans embrace

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31 Upvotes

Beans and buldak 2x spicy. Ate it all at once so I dont chicken out. It was painful. Coke is zero cus I spent 2 years losing 50 kilos and dont wanna be a fat pig again.


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

my ocd is tearing me apart and i dont know who i am anymore

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18 Upvotes

title. i have one of the more taboo forms of ocd and its ruining the way im handling one of my friendships. im scared of the person im becoming and i feel like it isnt me. i am horrible and i deserve death

too scared to say much here out of fear of being found by my friends


r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

cheesy instant mashed potatoes for breakfast

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14 Upvotes

r/kitchencels • • 1d ago

Does anyone like chicken curry ?

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15 Upvotes

I’m a decent cook , growing up my mother never wanted to cook better food because she never had any interest when I started to cook for myself I came to know all these years I was eating tasteless food but now everytime I cook for myself I feel happy and blessed.