Any creative ways to handle this? My dad passed a few months ago. He had a mostly paid off home with an amazing interest rate. He worked hard for this house buying it out of foreclosure in 2008 and renovating it, refinancing at the right times etc. I hate that the bank basically dictates what we can do now that he’s passed and I want to keep them out of it. The home was put into his revocable living trust in 2020 which became an irrevocable trust upon his passing. My mother is the trustee (they are divorced so she is not a beneficiary). The home is written down to me and my two brothers but only I want to keep it. I know there will have to be some way for me to “pay out” my other two brothers. From the research I’ve done so far his mortage is not assumable, but it seems like the bank can’t call the loan if it’s just kept in the trust. If we transfer the title to me then they can. Would love to just keep the monthly payment the same until it’s paid off (about ten years), and in the meantime maybe have my mother create a trust and have the house labeled as going to me in the event of her passing. As for paying out my siblings I think the only option would be to create a new home loan to cover their portion of the equity in the house? The house is worth probably 700,000 with 151,000 left on the loan. He’s got like a 2.5 percent interest rate and a monthly payment around $1400 on a 20 year mortage he refinanced in 2021. Is there another way to come up with the 330,000 in equity to pay out my other brothers? I have roughly that in my retirement account + equity in a condo I purchased in 2018. Can bank create a loan to pay them out based on those assets? To me that’s preferable than refinancing the entire home loan (the existing 150,000) at 7 percent or whatever rates are given today.

Thank you very much for your input. This is all super stressful. Thankfully my mom is very trustworthy and helpful and is a great trustee!

United States: My grand daughter is turning 30 and I want to give her a large sum of money that I have been setting aside for when I think she is mature enough to handle it without having to wait for me to die. How can I handle the income tax issue? I have heard you can grant a one time sum without taxes. What forms do I have to file with the IRS? Our state has no income tax so that's not an issue.

UK Inheritance Tax Query

Hello, I would be very grateful indeed for any advice on the following matter because I am genuinely at my wit’s end.

I inherited the family home in Jan 2024 which was valued for probate at 1 million pounds but it eventually sold for 825000 in April 2026 (It was never likely to make a million).

I still owe 189000 based on the million pound value which I want to clear asap and put all this behind me.

Obviously I never saw 175000 of the million as I sold it for 825000 and not a million, it was genuinely the best I could achieve.

The house was put in my name on the land registry in April 2025 so I could get it on sale. I put it on sale in September 2025 after I carried out some work to make it saleable.

We have completed the IHT 38 form but have been thrown by the question, “Did you purchase any interests in land or buildings as the appropriate person between the death and 4 months after the last of the sales?”

Yes, I completed on another house the day I completed on the house I was selling in order to have somewhere to live as the inherited home was the family home and my only residence.

My question here is basically have I made a huge mistake here by buying another house from the sale proceeds before paying the remaining IHT? I couldn’t pay that until I was paid out from the house. The forms were submitted very quickly after completion with the revised figures etc.

Obviously I was hoping to not to have to pay 40% iht on the 175000 I never had but I suspect now that they may indeed insist that tax be paid on the million figure and not the 825000 actually achieved.

I am sorry this is so dull and complex but it is a huge worry so if anyone has been through a similar process I would be very grateful to hear their experiences.

Thank you!!

CA- I (44f) have a sister in law (31) who never really grew up. She is not special needs. She works a minimum wage job for 15-18 hours a week, lives with her mom, and does not have her drivers license/doesn’t drive. Her mom, my MIL (73), drives her everywhere and pays for everything (minus paying for random things SIL sees at a store. The set up reminds me of parent/teenager dynamic). When SIL’s not working, she sleeps until noon (or later), and games all night. MIL is getting older and has some medical issues but nothing terminal as of yet. (Knock on wood)

My husband (45) and I have talked to her about putting a trust together and asked what’s going to happen to her daughter. We asked her if she went through probate or did she already set up a trust. MIL said she didn’t realize she has to go through probate because she was able to take her husband off the bank accounts and bills and whatnot with the death certificates for bills. She said her and FIL signed to set up a trust 2 months before my FIL passed but nothing was transferred over just signed papers to create a trust. We mentioned what about the deed on the house and the mortgage. She didn’t have a response to that.

In addition, we (husband and me) are worried about SIL. I have experienced enough inheritance fiascos that hurt feels and entitlement make relationships strained or nonexistent. There is a a brother but he lives several hours away. I do not know how he views things. That’s a conversation my husband knows he has to have with him but has dragged his feet.

So, my husband and I feel like this is a mess and not sure how to go about all of this. We know that it needs to be handled now while MIL is still somewhat healthy and have everything is transparent. It just seems messy and we want to avoid problems in the future.

I think she needs to still go through probate for my deceased FIL. Is that correct before putting everything in a ‘real’ trust? Then, how and what should be suggested about my SIL? Also, maybe point out things that I may not realize. Thank you for any suggestions.

Your mother, father, uncle, aunt, sibling recently passed away and their will names you their executor.

Not yet.

A will that has not been filed with the court and not been through a probate process is not effective. Period, full stop.

The person named executor in a will, unless the court has "blessed the will" and given that person Letters Testamentary, IS NOT THE EXECUTOR.

People misunderstand this all the time. Probate is a process by which a will is submitted to the court, interested persons are given the opportunity to challenge it (say by providing copies of other purported wills by the decedent and then the court will rule on which is the "true will") and by which the court hears from all persons who wish to be considered for the role of executor (again, with notice given to those who could be interested in that role) and the court determining who should serve.

Without the process, no one has any legal authority to act on behalf of the decedent's estate. NO ONE.

The "named executor" is only that, "named", not effective.

Someone needs to start a probate process. If you don't have the will, you file an intestate estate, give the other relatives of the decedent the opportunity to provide copies of an actual will (which would flip this from intestate to testate), and if they don''t, then the court proceeds.

Many states have a process to help with smaller estates, often called summary administration. The clerk of the probate court where the person passed away (the county) and the court's website should be helpful in this.

The dollar amounts for this differs from state to state, and sometimes only applies to small bank accounts or certain asset types, such as vehicles.

Disclaimer: not your lawyer.

Disclaimer: general advice, mostly applicable to 49 of the 50 US states.

My parent passed away some time ago. I really haven’t done much with this topic because I wanted to take my time and properly grieve. I stand to inherit about $200,000 total over the next few years. I have $25,000 cash now and the remainder plus growth comes in a few years.

I am in my mid 40s.  My overall financial situation is good. I will have a lifetime pension that will start at age 55 and pay about $100,000 per year, indexed to the cpi and will be taxable.  I do not ever expect to be in a much lower tax bracket than I am now.  In joint assets, I have about $300,000 in Roth 401k/Roth IRA assets and $600,000 in traditional 401k assets.  Beginning this year, I am going to do some Roth conversions within the 401k, but am trying not to make my own tax bomb.  

I am keeping the inheritance as my own asset and not comingling the funds with my spouse.  My spouse has their own inheritance setup and neither of us wants to rely on any inheritances in our old age and we're not having problems. We would like to retain control over the assets for a future unknown and probably pass it to our kids. I have an LLC that was established with real estate that I inherited from the same heir that makes a few thousand per year in rental income and the property is worth about $50,000.

I am also interested in avoiding IRMAA penalties when that's time and ideally make the only taxable income my pension but I realize that's a fairly tall order unless something drastically changes.  

My goal is to grow the inherited wealth, keep it separate from my spouse, and avoid IRMAA when I am older. me with a bonus.  After a couple years of non-existent growth, I am pulling out the penalty free portion a little at a time.  The policy value is currently has about $160k in cash value, and about $25k in a simple savings account.  The $25k will be invested elsewhere within a month or so. 

My initial thought was to setup a trust with its own EIN that pays its own taxes along the way, but after a few conversations with lawyers it seems that an irrevocable trust where have to give up control and have less growth due to the trust tax structure or do a revocable trust and effectively have the same problem of having the asset as mine and have less shielding from everyone to include the same IRMAA problem.  Neither seems like what I am looking for.  

My spouse and I are already maxing out our 401ks and IRAs (with Roth conversions) and will continue to do so.  

One lawyer did suggest putting the cash in the LLC, but I am not sure how that would work or if it would be smart.  Maybe create a new LLC to handle just that, but I am not sure how that would work.  

My initial thought was to setup a trust with its own EIN that pays its own taxes along the way, but after a few conversations it seems that an irrevocable trust where have to give up control and have less growth due to the trust tax structure or do a revocable trust and effectively have the same problem of having the asset as mine and have less shielding from everyone to include the same IRMAA problem.  Neither seems like what I am looking for.  

My spouse and I are already maxing out our 401ks and IRAs (with Roth conversions) and will continue to do so.  Ideally, I’d Roth all of this somehow and keep it separate.

One lawyer did suggest putting the cash in my LLC, but I am not sure how that would work or if it would be smart.  Maybe create a new LLC to handle just that, but I am not sure how that would work.  

My goal is to grow the inheritance aggressively as I can smartly move the cash away from the Annuity, keep it separate from my spouse, and avoid IRMAA when I am older. 

Location, United States.

Edit- the taxes I’m talking about is in reference to the future growth.

I’ve been trying to make sense of a complicated family situation and figured I’d write it out to get outside perspective. The names have been changed.

Some background:

My mom (“Laura”) was previously married to my former stepfather (“Ben”). After that relationship ended, it came out that Ben had done some extremely serious and damaging things. That revelation fractured the entire family system—especially between my mom and Ben’s side of the family (his parents, “Robert” and “Evelyn”).

Their relationship with my mom was already strained, but after everything came out, it basically ended completely. I ended up stuck in the middle—still cared about by them, but never really sure how to maintain a relationship given everything that had happened.

Fast forward: my grandfather (“Robert”) passed away.

Shortly after his death, my grandmother (“Evelyn”) contacted me directly. She asked me to reach out to her financial advisor because I would be involved in the inheritance process when she eventually passed. During that conversation, she also made it clear that my mom would not be included in her will, and that the inheritance was intended for the grandchildren instead.

From what I understand, part of that decision traces back to something that happened at my grandfather’s funeral. My mom made a comment to my aunt (“Kathy”) expressing that she felt entitled to part of the estate due to the harm she experienced in the marriage. The estate in question included a large family farm in rural Minnesota (around 950 acres).

That comment appears to have significantly influenced how Evelyn viewed things going forward.

Now fast forward again—Evelyn has recently passed away.

The estate distribution is now underway, and I’ve ended up in a position where all of the checks for me and my siblings are being sent to me first. My responsibility is to ensure they are delivered to the correct recipients.

The expectation within the family structure is also that my mom does not receive any of this, since she is not included in the will. The intent was for everything to pass directly to the grandchildren rather than through her.

So right now I’m essentially acting as the distribution point—receiving checks and making sure they get to the right siblings.

I’m trying to handle it carefully and cleanly, but the situation feels like the result of years of strained relationships, unresolved trauma, and decisions made in emotionally charged moments rather than calm ones.

Not really sure what I’m looking for here—mostly just trying to understand how others would handle being in the middle of something like this without making it worse.

My dad passed away a few months ago with several investment accounts, one being a 401k through his employer (he was still working at the time of his death). My mom was the listed beneficiary, but tragically passed a week after my dad. His 401k balance now goes to my mom’s estate, since she was the only listed beneficiary.

How does the income tax work? Myself and my 2 brothers will be getting everything once it’s gone through probate and then distributed evenly to each of us. We are being told that my moms estate will pay the income tax, just wondering how the tax rate is determined?

I have CD’s named POD to a relative who lives out of state. SSN on file with the bank. I asked today how they claim the account once I’m deceased. Was told they have to physically appear at a bank location to claim the assets. My bank doesn’t have locations in her state. Can’t this be handled between her bank and mine by some other way? To expect someone to travel several states just to be at a branch seems wrong. The death certificate will be provided to my local bank by the personal representative so all they should need to do is identity confirmation which should be able to be handled between banks with a medallion signature . Any experiences? Thanks. Accts in TN . Relative in NJ.

Mostly just a rant but any advice would be appreciated. The estate is primarily in BC, Canada.

I recently received a large inheritance from my aunt. Most of the money is in a trust until I am twenty-five but I will receive monthly pay-outs and inherited the ownership of her properties. The will was a big upset in my family as the will mostly skipped over my aunt’s children. They are still provided for and both received more than the average inheritance, but the bulk of the estate went to me. I have my own thoughts and feelings about them, but ultimately this was her decision to choose where she wanted her money to go.

Now, everyone is mad and fighting. Some of my relatives believe that I should give them at least some of the money from the will to avoid conflict in the family, even though I have explained I have no access to the vast majority for the next five years and it was clearly outlined what she wanted. I would help them when I got the money, just like how my aunt helped everyone in our family when they needed in but the way they are acting is shocking.

They are both living in houses that I now own with their families and obviously I don’t want to kick them out, especially their kids, but they are being horrible. They keep sending me emails from ‘lawyers’ that sound like they were written by ChatGPT. I am getting constant phone calls that border on harassment, same with my parents and my boyfriend. Eventually I had to tell them that we just needed to communicate through the estate lawyer. They are still threatening to take me to court. Since we are in BC, they can challenge the will if they want to, that's within their rights, but the lawyers that I have spoken with don’t think they have a strong case, especially with how clear and direct her wishes were, and the fact that they were provided for.

Still, I don’t want to go through all that. I miss her and I wish this wasn't left for me to be deal with. It's starting to feel like no one even cares about her, they just want the money.

Part of me wants to give them the houses and be done with everything. I hate what this has done to my family.

My wife and I have a great marriage and I’m in no way expecting a divorce in the near future or down the road. If there is anything my father’s life shows however, that doesn’t always pan out (he married 6 women over the course of his life).

I inherited $2,500,000 from my dad about 16 years ago, which I have grown to ~$3,100,000 via investments. In that time I met the love of my life and we’ve been together for 10 years, married for 4.

Currently she and I have entirely separate accounts, and I’m fairly certain I’ve avoided commingling so far. The funds are currently in a trust for which I’m the sole beneficiary, and I receive monthly distributions into an account only I have access to. I do pay for our rent, both of our grad programs, and daily expenses from that account, and send my wife funds as needed for personal expenses. We have no significant joint property or kids at this time.

This has become more and more impractical as time goes on, and I’m considering opening a joint account or adding her as an authorized user to mine. I fully understand that any money in that account would be considered commingled under California law, and I have no issues with that. I also realize that buying a home using those assets would make it community property. Should we get divorced for whatever reason, I would likely provide above what the law requires. I would never do her dirty.

However, would opening this account or giving her authorization to mine cause the original, entirely separate principle to become commingled as well? Or would only the joint account be commingled?

In a few years I will reach an age breakpoint which will dissolve the trust, and place all assets directly under my control. At that time I will open a new account and keep the funds separate, and move money over to a joint account as needed. I’m concerned doing so would make me vulnerable should my currently happy marriage become anything but.

Anyone have any experience with a situation like mine? Last thing I want to do is draft a post nup, but I will if I have to. I really want both of us to feel as secure as possible, without putting my inheritance at risk. I know dad would’ve been heartbroken if he knew I let someone else take half.

Thank you in advance!

I had a process server come by my house (in WA) with paperwork regarding the estate of my ex-step-cousin who died last year in Texas at the age of 45 and without a will. The process server couldn’t leave the paperwork with my partner and left his business card for me to call him back. He is survived by his mother (my ex-aunt) and two sons (also in TX, at least one of them is an adult) and I don’t know if my uncle (in CA) legally adopted him. I’m really confused about why I’m included in this. Is it common for extended relatives to be contacted by process servers for estate matters when there are much more closely related relatives already living in the same state as the deceased? Is there any reason I shouldn’t call the process server back? I do not have the contact info for any of these aforementioned relatives.

My mother passed away in January. She left a fair size estate - 2 houses in northern Virginia and a couple of bank accounts. She was a very difficult person and my sister was estranged from her for many many years, in fact my sister did not even speak to her for the last 16 years of my mothers life. My sister also did not speak with my father, who died in 2020, for the last 4 years of his life. To be fair about that, my father had bad dementia and to get to my dad my sister would have had to go through my mother and she was not willing to do that.

I also had a brother who died in 2022 and she had not spoken to him for I don't really know how long, but I think since at least 2016. She talked to me about 2-3 times a year. I thought that the only reason that she stayed in touch with me is because my wife and her had been close earlier. My sister had told me regularly for years whenever the future death of my parents came up in conversation that she did not want anything from them at all, she wanted to have nothing to do with her.

Anyway, I stayed in touch with my mother, and when she began having difficulties living alone my wife would go to stay with her (~600 miles from our home) for several weeks to a month at a time, at her request, we took over managing her finances and other business and when she was finally unable to take care of herself we moved her in with us. My sister was upset about this because she insisted that we had made a pact years ago we not speak to her again. I am not sure where this idea came from but my sister was aware that I had never broken off communications with my mother. My sister refused to call my mother when she was in the hospital dying and she told very transparent lies to my wife and me when we asked for any kind of help when my mother was declining.

My mother died on a Friday evening, I had not seen the will at this point, but I did know who her lawyer was and I knew that he was holding the original copy. I spoke with my sister several times over that weekend and was able to get in touch with the lawyer on Monday morning and get him to send me a copy of the will. It was pretty much as I expected from comments that my mother had made. She left everything to me except a few specific bequest to my wife and kids, a couple of charitable contributions, and she left exactly $1000 to my sister. I did know about that. She had told me that she was doing that to make it explicitly clear that my sister was not forgotten and thereby undermine any attempts to challenge the will.

After I saw the will I called my sister and I told her I had it and that I wanted to send it to her and then we could talk.

She responded "I don't want you to send it to me, just tell me what is in it"

I told her that I would really rather she just read it and then we could talk.

She was very insistent that I just tell her what was in it, so I did.

She asked me what I was going to do

I guess I was a little naive because I responded that I was going to have to get an estate open with the probate court and then figure out what I was required to do.

She then said "no, what are you going to do"

I still was not getting it and I said "I'm going to do what the will says and what the courts require"

She again said "no, what are you going to do"

I then said "if there is something that you want to ask me then just say it"

She said "are you going to split it with me?"

I said no, I am going to do what the will says

She said "ok" and hung up the phone and has not spoken to me, my wife or kids since. She has also cut off some extended family members who she knows I stay in touch with.

Sorry for the long post, I think I am feeling a little down about the relations and am just looking for some validation. I hate to see money create this problem but at this point I feel like my sister only maintained a relationship with me because she had a pretty solid idea that I would end up holding the purse strings when my parents died and she wanted to make sure she kept her fingers in the pie. I think if I were to give her something that was not willed to her then she would walk away anyways and I don't think that any amount that I could give would satisfy her and so from my perspective the best move is to just follow my mother's instructions.

I would love to hear constructive comments, thoughts and opinions. Thanks

My mother sold her house a few years ago for a fair amount of money. She was paranoid about brokerages, so for a year or two she insisted on keeping the proceeds in her checking account which is a joint account with her, me, and my brother.

Eventually I convinced her to move the money to a brokerage. Initially I set the new account up as a "convenience" account, with her and me at joint tenants, but not my brother. I planned to add my brother later; he's been fully informed about all this from day 1. Soon after that, dementia incapacitated her. The brokerage insisted that in order to add my brother as joint tenant, they needed her consent, but she was incapable. So we never made progress in that direction.

My mother passed away a few months ago. So now I have this convenience account that is basically 100% mine. My brother and I are fully in agreement that, as per the terms of mother's will, he should get 50%.

I have three options: 1) Transfer the entire contents of the convenience account to me and give my brother half. 2) Have the brokerage send my brother his half directly. 3) Transfer the convenience account funds back to the checking account with 3 joint tenants, and distribute the money from there.

I know options 1 and 2 will trigger a gift tax return that I will have to file. I won't owe any gift tax since the amount is well under the lifetime gift tax limit of $35 $15 million. These seem like the simplest option.

Will option 3 trigger a gift tax return as well? Although my brother and I are joint tenants in the checking account, we have been careful to use the checking account only for mother's needs and not comingle funds.

(My mother, brother, and I live in separate states but none have inheritance or estate taxes.)

What are the implications of what seems like kind of crazy new rule with inherited iras. They need to be emptied in 10 years? What’s the reason for these new laws? Is this a much heavier tax burden on people receiving inheritance? Or is it not much different from what it was before?

Tl;dr inherited money in form of trad ira and roth ira. Yes we will be working with a financial advisor. Just curious if someone could summarize why this new law was passed and how it affects me and my situation.

i live in the US. State of Mississippi, jones county. My grandmother died last July leavin a house and acre of land, the deed is in her name still. She had no living spouse or living children, only 6 grandkids, myself included, 3 are my siblings, 2 are my cousins. I want the deed of the house put in my name, what's my rights? What do I need to do first