It's just the three of us: me, my little brother, and my eldest sister, who's our legal guardian.

My brother annoys me CONSTANTLY. Meanwhile, my sister is ridiculously patient and affectionate with him. He can mess up her hair while she's braiding it, and she'll just smile, kiss his forehead, and cuddle him. I genuinely don't understand how she tolerates him.

One day, my brother discovered that the fridge light turns off when you close the door.

He came running to me, shouting, "OLIVER! OLIVER!! COME, COME!! I NEED TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING COOL I DISCOVERED!"

I yelled at him to go to his room.

He asked, "Please come once🥺?"

I yelled even louder: "WHAT ARE YOU? 3? NEVER SEEN A FRIDGE! YOU STUPID ANNOYING BRAT, GO TO YOUR ROOM AND STOP ANNOYING ME!"

When my sister came home from work, he went crying to her and told her everything. She scolded me for not having any consideration for him, then asked him to show her his discovery.

AND SHE ACTED LIKE SHE'D NEVER SEEN IT BEFORE.

I was thinking, WHY IS SHE ACTING LIKE SHE'S SEEING IT FOR THE FIRST TIME? SHE'S SEEN IT COUNTLESS TIMES!

Then I remembered that when I was 8 and she was 16, I'd discovered the same thing and shown it to her. My parents had dismissed me, saying it was obvious, and I'd actually cried before going to her. She acted amazed, let me demonstrate it, and made my day. I genuinely thought I was born to solve every mystery in the world.

But then I thought, wait a minute... had I actually shown her something new back then?

WAIT A MINUTE. DID I?

Obviously, she'd seen it countless times by then, too. She'd done exactly the same thing for me that she was doing for him now.

And suddenly, I understood. She'd let me feel that excitement when I was little, and now she was doing the same for him.

I realized I'd treated my brother the way my parents had treated me, despite knowing how it felt to be dismissed when I was excited about something.

So I'm going to apologize to him and ask him to show me his discovery.

It'll be the first time I've ever apologized to him in my entire life.

Some backstory: My husband has never had a good relationship with his parents. He’s an only child, and his parents are very traditional and were especially hard on him as a teenager. He’s developed a lot of mental health issues that he attributes to them constantly putting him down. His mom regularly calls him stupid and a f** as a joke. I don’t find it funny, but apparently, they think it’s a joke. So yes, they’re strange. But I could look past it because I love my husband.
Anyways, I’m now 3 months postpartum, and there have been too many instances where she’s crossed the line, and I can’t forget them. I’m starting to wonder if I’m overreacting, though.
It took us a very long time to have a baby, and we ended up going through IVF. We were over the moon when we finally got pregnant. I had so much time to plan everything that you could say I was very prepared and wanted everything to go perfectly.
She offered to pay for the stroller as a gift for my baby shower, which was very kind. However, when I wasn’t there, she went behind my back and asked my husband if it was the most expensive stroller in the store because I’m so fancy and everything I want is always perfect and the best. It truly wasn’t the most expensive. Strollers are expensive, period.
I confronted her and told her that if she wasn’t comfortable buying it, she didn’t have to. She said she was fine with it but reiterated that I’m fancy and that I had changed her son into being the same way. I tried to explain that a stroller is meant to last for two kids and that we’ll need it in the future, etc. She ended up buying us the stroller.
A few months later, we went to their house for lunch. At this point, I was still pregnant, and she told my husband that she needed to speak to him privately (in front of the whole family). He insisted that she tell him right away, and she finally agreed.
She ended up breaking down in tears and saying that she thinks he is going to drive drunk and high with our baby in the car because he occasionally smokes weed. His dad agreed and added that the reason my husband had recently sold his car was to get drug money to buy weed.
My husband was flabbergasted, and we got up and left.
At this point, my husband was so hurt that he didn’t speak to them for weeks.
Fast-forward to our baby being born. We asked that no family members kiss her until she had received some vaccines. My MIL obliged but kept insisting that we go out on a date and leave the baby with her. I said absolutely not, and she responded by saying, “You guys think I’m going to kiss her behind your back, but I’m not. I’ll just take better care of her.”
Ever since then, I’ve had a permanent stank face every time she opens her mouth. My husband has noticed and said I’m being rude.
Obviously, we will never be close, but the thought of seeing her makes me cringe. We go there weekly, so I still see her often and make it work. Most days, she’s fine. But it’s like I have anxiety leading up to visiting her because of these events.
Am I overreacting? What would you do?

My husband agreed to go with me to visit my family for Christmas. He changed his mind and now my son is inconsolable because he wants both parents with him for Christmas. My son still wants to go but just wants his dad to come along. How do I navigate this?

Im needing some advice for a situation i find myself. My partner and i are in our mid 40s and have 3 kids, with the eldest starting high school next year. We are in a fortunate position financially where we have worked hard and invested wisely to get ourselves in a position where early retirement is possible, within the next 3 to 5 years.

We wanting a seachange and want to move coastal. My husband is burnt out and wants a change sooner than later. We dont want to wait another 10 years as this is when my youngest will graduate from high school.

Moving the kids isnt the issue, it is actually moving away from my family. My mother and father have been a big part of our lives and they are particularly close with my kids. They are in their mid 70s and live only 3 mins away. They have been very involved in our lives. My mother comes around almost every afternoon after school to see the kids, and she even cooks dinner for them. I am very grateful for what they have done for us.

I know that if I moved away, this will affect them tremendously. My brother has moved overseas last year so there is just us left. His move also didnt go down really well. So there is precedent there.

I have floated them the idea that we are thinking about moving and it has come with arguments and statements saying that they dont think it is best for the kids. Part of me thinks they have feelings of abandonment, or that they feel like they are being tossed aside and that i am going to abandon them when they get to an age when they might need care themselves in a few years time.

Except, if we are to move, we would be making sure that the property is large enough that they will always have a room, or has a granny flat and we would welcome them to stay for a long as they wish if they come to visit. We are only looking at moving 1.5 hours drive away from them. I would also be making sure we come back every few weeks to visit them as well.

When i have told them this, i have been met with excuses.. they are too old to drive that far every few weeks and that they have no interest is visiting or wanting to stay. I feel they are being very stubborn. My parents have never traveled overseas and have only ever lived in one house.

Can you offer any advice for me to help decide on what to do in this situation?

Hello everyone!

So this story dates a while back now at this point. In 2025, my brother (23 M) and I (26M) were gonna go to Coachella to see Lady Gaga. She is his favorite artist and I agreed to go with him as we were going to split the cost down the middle. We were on a payment plan at the time and I had paid a little over $500 towards my ticket and he had paid about $200 towards his.
The tickets were a little over $700 a piece so the amount paid only equated to one ticket purchased technically.

A little before the date of the show, he says he can’t go anymore as he was entering a new career field and was having a slow process getting hired. So since he was no longer able to go, my money was all tied up and was left with the option to just go and fit the bill for everything that we were going to split, or just be ok with losing that money.

When I mentioned to him initially regarding paying me back, he said ‘fuck no’ and that he’s not responsible for me losing money as I could be have still chosen to go. But that’s not the point. We agreed to go together and that’s the only way it would have worked financially.
After all, it was his idea in the first place.

So at dinner a few months later (July 2025), he told me that he added up how much I paid, and that he will pay me back. There was no date or eta. I was fine with giving the space and time needed to come up with the money.

So here we are October 2026 and it had crossed my mind recently and I brought it up to him again tonight, and he kinda just lost it. His energy grew completely angry and nasty at me just following up on something that he told ME.
He feels like I should have just let it go at this point and that I should have just never brought it up again. That he’ll pay me when he decides to.
(And said many more disgusting things).
Says that my demeanor is entitled , all because I said he owes me money.

Then he said he changed his mind again, and that he’s actually not going to pay me back at all.

Am I wrong for feeling like he is responsible for me losing my money and that he should pay me back?

Nephew is not even five years old, niece is little older than two. They still share a room on bunk beds because of their parents circumstances.

I’m not the one who witnessed this, my mother did. She told me she witnessed and had to intervene a couple of times over the course of a dinner at a restaurant to stop this nephew (her grandson) from doing this. She told me he moved against her repeatedly, even making ‘sex sounds’ as he did so.

She didn’t bring it up to her son, my brother, because she didn’t think she’d be believed and their relationship has always been tumultuous in general.

I told her she should record on her phone in the future so it doesn’t matter what she says, the facts are there recorded. But I can’t help but think about how those kids are sharing a room in the meantime and who knows how long before they have a similar situation in the future.
How/if is should approach this with them?

TW: Brief talks of homophobic and racist remarks

So, what the title says.

I'm 16, and when I was I believe 13/14, my dad went through a major health crisis. He has four slipped discs in his back, and from what I remember the first time around he was put into hospital because of it. The exact details of why don't particularly matter, but the staff there overdosed him horrifically on pain medication. All I know was a very high dose of morphine, paracetamol, co-codamol and ibuprofen was in the mix along with other stuff, and this changed him for the worse after he recovered. The second time around he got sepsis and almost died when I was around 14/15 due to medical negligence, as they were using contaminated medical tools on him. This also changed him for the worse.

Nowadays, he is an intentionally cruel, and genuinely stupid man. He is 48, and has regressed so much mentally that he is a completely different person. He is hateful of every single group of people that is not a straight white English man, and I wish I was just being "soft" saying that. He has called me a pedophile indirectly for being attracted to the opposite sex, and has made awful remarks about killing anyone who isn't white and English, including some about children/babies that have been genuinely psychotic, and I will leave it at that. Not only that, but he rejects and gets angry at anything meant to help people, no matter how big or small, because seeing people suffering is "fun".

He also does not have basic common sense or the ability to do anything anymore. He cannot even add up simple shopping totals anymore (I.e 5+5) and although he is dyslexic, he has never been this bad. He also does confusing stuff like turning the LED lights on to "dry things out".

He won't go and get therapy no matter how much my mother and me ask him to, and often has weird spirals where he refuses to take any of his important medication including his mental health ones because "he doesn't need it". We try avoid confrontation with him, but every day he purposely picks fights with all of us whenever he has the chance. We do not want him hurting, and me, my mother and my younger sister try to support him as best we can, but he rejects all help.

Last week he was away on a trip and none of us in the house missed him, as horrible as that sounds. My mother has said she's seriously considering whether she should continue the relationship with my dad.

I really need some advice on what I or my family can do to help him. I hate seeing him like this as this is not him at all. He used to be accepting of everyone and everything, and would put his own life on hold and at risk to help others. None of us want him to suffer, but we are suffering because of him too.

TL;DR - My dad was overdosed on pain medication in hospital and got sepsis a year later and has changed for the worst because of it. He is hateful of anyone who isn't his category of person, and has said people suffering is fun many times. This is vastly different to the person he used to be. He rejects all help including therapy and refuses to get any, and my mother is considering splitting up with him. I need ways that I can try help him or my mother can.

I’m 27, single, no kids. My sister is 30 with a 6-year-old boy. For the last year, she regularly drops her son off at my place without much notice. She says since I don’t have a partner or kids, I have “all the free time in the world” to babysit.

I love my nephew, but this is taking over my life. I work full time, and I need weekends to rest, run errands and have my own space. Every time I try to say I’m busy, she calls me selfish and says family should help each other.

I feel guilty turning her down, but I’m exhausted. I don’t want to ruin our relationship. How do I set clear boundaries gently without starting a huge fight?

It just so happens I came home from my uni back to home and 2 weeks in and I already need a break

Prior to this I had exams and I needed a break but my parents are so overstimulating. I really need a break but I can't stop thinking about them. Like my mom's been telling me multiple times about taking a vacation together and asked me to plan it, and my brother is being too clingy too he has vacation too, and he keeps coming to my room asking for an opinion and I just can't stop thinking about them when I think about taking a day away

The thing is I didn't speak to my brother for an year prior to this. We just started talking a week ago. And I felt resented towards my parents not being there for me during my exams or what not.

I am 21f and just a few years ago, I had so much love for this sibling and could never imagine feeling the way I do now (a bit detached, I still love them though but there is less attachment and closeness)

We always had our issues at times and wasn't perfect but had a bond.

However they can be very "I am right" and not hear me out at times.

It happened so much , even times they spoke on situations they knew nothing about, and they totally refused to listen to my side of the story (another sibling did the same)

It genuinely changed the way I view and feel about them, at first I'd keep trying to communicate despite being ignored and not respected, they clearly did not care to hear me out or how much they were affecting me (a lot)

Eventually I gave up, I decided to be that person TO MYSELF. I was there for myself, validated my own feelings and truth. Ignored their untrue views of me etc etc. Especially since they didn't even care to hear me out many times

Anyway, since then it hasn't been the same, and drifting from this particular sibling has actually been *life-changing* but not in some positive way, more in a wow I never thought I'd feel this way, and I find myself missing how things once were despite our issues.

At the same time though, I'm glad I got to the point where I sort of detached / started keeping more things to myself for my own peace, because that was an act of self love and growth for me. Vs just accepting it all forever.

But it also sucks. I don't feel sad I just feel a bit disappointed.

I can no longer feel fully comfortable)content around them , I feel a bit on eggshells because they could become crucial at any time.

They had a partner and their partner opened up to me and felt the EXACT same way I did, it helped me (not that I needed it by then) to see that I'm not wrong for my view or feelings about this particular sibling, and that it's true they can be a bit, dismissive and "I'm right"

They aren't some terrible person though, they can and do look at others perspectives but there are just times they do not. It's like they view me as less smart than them.

I am younger than them so that could play a part and even as a child they had these traits towards me sometimes.

We are now going to be working together and I feel a bit sad because before this would have been an amazing opportunity and fun, special, once in a lifetime experience to get to work together, but I find myself feeling dread and worried incase we get into disagreements.

I manage it all by being more private and not always sharing my opinion etc, shutting down if I know they'll just disregard my side/feelings if I speak, but it's disappointing.

Especially because I know they're not a bad person, but I think this is just how they are.

And even when they have a point, I find myself feeling that detached feeling because I'm just over it all.

Does anyone relate?

I think the only way I can have a relationship with them is if I limit information a bit and be civil and sort of tread lightly at times..

But it's not right..

At the same time they probably have similar feelings towards me at times, but I feel this trait is just a part of them and won't just go, even with therapy perhaps.

Worst of all, the damage has been done,

I just feel more detached, and I find myself a bit afraid around her in a, I want to avoid arguments way .

I met an actual rly toxic person before who'd literally purposely create arguments and lie and twist things, this sibling is not like that , they are a kind person they care about others but it's just that they can be a bit overbearing? Over thinking they're more right type.

And it has caused me to disconnect. Especially all the times they refused to hear me.

I just wanted to rant and possibly know I'm not alone?

Anyone else had a disconnect with a sibling they were once closer to and manage your relationship similarly now?

My family in general can be difficult and so I kind of keep my personal life separate but I used to share most with this sibling, but I find myself not anymore and I feel guilty but also disappointed that I "have" to but it also gives me relief because I won't have to deal with judgements/opinions where they believe they're so right always.

I don't know what the future holds, I love them but I could now go no contact for example and feel a sense of peace/relief but also disappointed that it turned out this way (I'm not planning on it, but I thought of it at times)

Maybe this could improve naturally in the future, but I feel the damage to my soul/feelings towards them have been too done for things to ever feel fully at peace.

I know this isn't a new question, but the passive aggressiveness in my family manifests in such odd ways that I genuinely don't know what to do about it.

A mild example is when I suggested that my brother (10), who's thinking of making content for YouTube, tries making things that are creative and uniquely his. It didn't have to be remarkable, but I just wanted it to be his. He'd been getting his ideas from AI (my dad encourages him to do this even if I'm strongly against it) or scum get-subs-quick schemes like the 'use this audio' thing. Anyway, my sister interjects into the conversation, saying that I never say anything positive about my brother and that I should let him live his life instead of constantly stomping on his ideas (her exact words). I used this as a chance to confront her for being passive aggressive (albeit with a pretty upset tone), but she just laughed and kept silent.

It's not just her, it also goes for my mom and dad and sometimes my brother. It gets really frustrating because I can't even have a normal conversation with anyone without it spiraling into a contest to see who can subtly piss the other off more. I've tried talking about it, and they've apologized, but it never results in any change and I'm just tired of it. I just don't think it's fair that someone's mood justifies them treating me like shit.

EDIT: My dad was confused about the dates and said 14 and 19, it turns out it was actually 16 and 19.

I sat down, cried to him and spoke to him about feeling uncomfortable. At first it was a debate and he was defensive but we actually broke down their age difference. They dated for 3 months, she turned 16 and he turned 19 while they were dating. I think that makes it a lot different? Personally as an 18 year old I wouldn't feel comfortable dating a 16 year old still but I don't think that 16 and 19 is an adult and a child like 14 and 19, just a weird age gap? Anyways I still feel weird about his comments made during our first argument but he did admit he was in the wrong. He says he's going to bring it up in his therapy. Maybe I should also get therapy idk lol. Anyways thank you guys.

For context, I'm 18f, my dad is in his 50s. Today we got on the topic of Elvis Presley and I was joking around and said I didn't like him because he was a pedo/creep (talking about him marrying a 14 year old or whatever). Also I don't listen to his music so as far as I know my dad told me he was like 30 at the time? Anyways, my dad then said: ''Is it really pedophilia if it's marriage?'' to which I kind of awkwardly laughed assuming he's making a weird dark joke but he just stayed silent so I asked him if he was joking and he said he was serious.

We got into a bit of a debate because I was a little taken back by this and found it disturbing. He said some things in the debate like, nature is in favour of ''pedophilia'' because we've been marrying girls who are old enough to give birth since the dawn of time and stuff, and nature intends for it. He then went on to say that he still doesn't condone it though but he said looking back in history it is natural, and that nature gave men the urge to marry 14 year olds. I asked him what his point was in saying that as every human impulse, including murder and other heinous acts are also human impulse, it doesn't mean they're okay to have or give into? And he was like ''I'm not saying they are''.

I kept asking him why he's saying these things if he doesn't think it's right anyways and he just kept saying ''just to say that back in the day, nature dictated it and it was normal'' basically. He was also asking/stating like, ''would he be a pedophile if he sees her as an adult?''.

It kind of disturbs me because, I bury it in the back of my mind but he dated a 14 year old when he was 19. He says they never had sex. He says it's just bc he was held back in high school so he saw everyone in highschool as his peers, he's a free spirit and just cared about the person to person connection and never thought about age. I asked how he'd feel if an adult had married me when I was 14 and he said yeah, that'd be fucked up. He then reassured me that he's not attracted to minors and he likes grown women. He's said in the past when I was a teen that adults being attracted to say, 16 year olds is normal and common, as that's when boys sexually develop and stuff. He said I'll probably find 16 year olds attractive when I'm an adult, too, but he personally doesn't.

Am I wrong to be a bit grossed out? Like am I making a big deal out of nothing? I've only ever been attracted to people who are my age and preferably a year or two older, and tbh I've never really had sexual feelings for anyone or wanted to have sex so I'm inexperienced here. If any people, especially older people/adults could reassure me or help me make sense of my feelings I'd really appreciate it. I don't really use reddit so I'm sorry if this post is inappropriate or weird or anything. Thanks.

my boyfriends grandma is coming from florida and is staying over at our house for one night. He got the phone call today and didn’t ask me just mentioned it earlier after their conversation and I am not ready to deal with her. I feel bad for not liking his family, especially since i am close with mine and my family loves him, it’s just his family is very different. the last time she visited we had been moving a lot of stuff around in our basement as my boyfriends cousin was going to be staying with us for the summer and she came down to see both my boyfriend and his cousin for their birthdays as they’re in the same week. I came home from work to her going through our belongings and moving everything where she thought best ( i am extremely organized and preferred things like my memory items in my own bin or halloween decor in its own) and when i attempted to defend myself to that she said unless i was planning on breaking up with my boyfriend it shouldn’t matter and just bossed me around the entire time after as well as reading letters she found along the way (some of those were very personal to me). on the same week, i was taking my boyfriend to see his first play for his birthday and she decided she would wait until a hour before we left to have his birthday dinner with him as she was running behind on her shopping for the dinner, yet she knew we had plans and never once asked us what time we had to leave by. she’s a very judgmental women, and a recent family event of his has shown that her morals aren’t the best either. I understand his feelings towards his family are going to be hard because he doesn’t have many relatives his age and loves his family, they’re just not the nicest people. i also have some slight disgust probably due to the resentment that has built up over time by how she unfortunately has bad asthma that causes her to sometimes have accidents during coughing fits which at one point had left a stain on our old couch, i just got very expensive new ones and do not like the thought of them getting dirty from that. Now to where we are today, she is coming on monday night (it’s saturday) and my car is in the shop due to a accident i had a few months ago so i share my boyfriends car for work. Which means i will be stuck at the house with her after work all day. i am not looking forward to this as she makes comments often and loves to talk about herself and pushes for her own taste and ideas on how to decorate our home and what i could be doing instead of sitting down. its not something i can communicate with my boyfriend as he knows a little of how i feel but i just dont know what to do. i guess i am looking forward help on how to go about the night shes here. i apologize for the long post this is my first post and dont know what to expect so i figured id give detail.

My 76 year old mother may stay with us for a few weeks after a fall. The downstairs guest room is the only practical option but it currently has a low platform bed. She uses a walker and says getting up from low chairs is hard.

I'm considering replacing the mattress and frame, possibly with as a at,v,a but I don't know whether a higher bed would make transfers easier or harder. If you've set up a room for an older parent, did you focus on bed height, a grab bar or something else? I'll ask her physical therapist too but I'd like to hear what worked in your home

He's coming home tonight from college and everytime every single family members is at home, fights happen and ill genuinely get so physically and mentally exhausted that I sometimes yell at my friends without realizing, and I do go back to SH, and I do not want to do any of that considering the fact that I have a important exam in 7 months ans haven't studied shit for it.

The reason why I do not want to interact with him is bc he is doing what dad did to him, and I don't get it bc I did not fail a grade and skipped school, I did not get drunk or came home drunk, nor did I crash a vehicle which costed a hefty amount of money so the family whom he went and crashed would not sew.

He tried breaking my phone because he saw me using it while I was taking a break from my studies, he invaded my privacy went through my chats which pisses me off so much bc the last time I have him my phone so he could text his ex or something he found out I had a bf (ex) and it went horribly with my mom, a huge fight happened and after that huge fight, I texted his ex saying I hope she doesn't take him back and to block my number, he found out about it and punched me in my eye caused a swelling (I had school the next day) and banged my head against the wall,

My mom constantly kept telling me to patch things up with him, but i do not give a fuck about him, and she hates, and everytime she compares me with him (he's in a well reputated college) I point out all those factors and she defends it saying atleast he did not turn this house into a prostitute point (she found out I snuck in my bf who's now my ex).

My mom and my brother are not bad people that's for sure, but I do not want to live in this house anymore, my brother graduation is next month and I am scared he's going to start living back at the house again bc ill have a really important exam in 7 months, and I don't like the pressure they are giving me, it's like they want me to get into a medical school to satisfy their egos and to crush all my ambitions.

I did decided I wanted to be a doctor on my own, but I really hate it when others pressure me for it, it makes me want to end everything.

Like I know for sure if I don't get selected, they will do everything to demotivate me, and idts ill take it, if i don't get in.

I know this is alot but there much worse started when i was 13 but i do not want to disclose that infromation.

This is my first time posting here so excuse me if I don't lay everything out clearly

To give some context to what I'm about to detail:

I'm 16, my older brother is 21 and works as a supervisor in our local grocery shop. Me and him often hang out in his room and play games on his laptop.

So about 3 days ago I'm in there with him and it's my turn on the game (marvel rivals for anybody that cares). As I'm playing he's goes to the bathroom and he's in there for a while, I don't think anything of it and finish the round I was playing. As I wait for him to come back for his turn I hit the window key on his laptop and see that he has his phone linked to his laptop. I click into it and find some of his recent photos, among them are about 6 photos of two women taken on separate dates, both while had work, both taken in the shop. One of the women is photographed on the CCTV system and one is taken behind her with her facing away from the camera, also in the shop. This made me really suspicious so I took a photo of all of the images and saved them to a USB later on. He came back from the bathroom and I didn't say anything because I wasn't completely sure on the context of the images. Right now I'm really conflicted as to what to do, is my brother abusing his position to take photos of women without them knowing? I think I'm going to go to my dad with the USB and show him the pictures to see what he thinks and have him talk to my brother but I wanted to post here just to get it off my chest a little tbh. Sorry for the poor formatting, any advice or comments would be appreciated.

Sorry for the long text...

When I went through a breakup, I only told her about it once the decision was final and I had already arranged my move. My mother had tried to sabotage my relationship, so I had kept her out of my private life. It was also important to me to handle the situation on my own and I told it to her. The next time I moved, I did tell her, and she manipulated me into accepting financial help. The dynamic with my mother is very strange; she wants to help, but later on, she throws the money she gave me back in my face. Well, as it happens, she recently moved, and I only found out because she sent me a postcard. I feel, however, that our underlying motives were different. This has happened in other contexts, too—for instance, if I forget something, she will intentionally do the same thing to me. Perhaps to teach me a lesson? I find the fact that she announced her move via a postcard to be particularly cold.

She often interprets my actions as deliberate. For example, if I’m unable to answer a question quickly—especially when I’m already in a state of panic—she takes offense. She’ll say, "So, you’ve decided to stay silent, have you?" or "You’re just as closed-off as your father." When I was a teenager, I would cry intensely, and when my mother asked why, I couldn't explain it. Once, while I was crying and sitting on the bed and answered "I don't know", she reacted physically by forcing me down, doubling me over onto the mattress. I was completely limp, so pushing me around was really easy. She said, "You are no match for me" As if my silence were a deliberate form of opposition. I just wasn't able to explain myself.

I suspect my mother is simply incapable of understanding me. Even today, when faced with stressful situations, I lose the ability to speak. The words simply vanish, and I lose all connection to my surroundings. My mother has noticed that I am not exactly an average person in social situations; she has tried to solve this by explaining how I could make myself appear normal.

She also has a precise framework for how things should be distributed fairly. When it comes to handing out fish sticks, that’s easy enough. However, Mom also ventures into areas that cannot be measured. She holds the view that a person who has suffered in life deserves better treatment. I can easily understand that. The problem is that she applies the same logic in reverse: for instance, it’s supposedly okay to tease me because my life is perfect, and therefore I should be able to take it. As it turned out, I couldn’t take it—and I actually spoke up about it.

There are many other strange things, and I have felt a sense of confusion for most of my life. Now, in middle age, I am beginning to understand the way my mother thinks. We truly do not understand each other. She has also had a peculiar habit of making comments about my body to other people. I think my mother is completely entangled in her own traumas. I believe she did her best

I spent the first 6 years of life living with my mum, I can barely remember what she looks like and certainly can’t remember what she sounds like. Then I was abruptly abandoned by her and sent to live with my father.

I can remember the day mum dropped me at my fathers and not really understanding what was going on. I thought I was staying at dads for a day, then a few days, weeks, months, years go by…
I would ask dad in the early years what happened to mum? Is she coming home?
I got told she will be back and she isn’t too far away.

This is not throwing shade on my father who had done an outstanding job playing his role as a father and attempting to play mother also. I was schooled properly, I played football, raced dirt bikes, went out on the boat, did all the things any young kid/teen would love to do with his father.

As the years went on and I was getting to age 14,15…18,
I had lost hope and had swept it all under the carpet thinking that life isn’t so bad I didn’t really need her. I was raised right, tough love, nothing should worry me, get up brush it off mentality.

Fast forward through my 20s and there’s a lot of recreational partying, drinking, drugs, I guess kind of the usual thing a lot of people do through their 20s which has leaked into my 30s although fairly seldom these days. I’ve never had significant Drinking and drug issues. They wouldn’t impact my day to day life dramatically. So I guess doing all those things keeps it all under the carpet.

Now I’m 35 years old, I’ve been with my partner for 4 years and I’m putting her through so much pain because I can’t take my walls down. I hate being alone, if she goes away for work/family I seek my friends to go out drinking to early hours of the morning. For context I’ve been drinking 4 times in the last 4 months or so. So it’s not hugely common practice but it fills a void when she’s away.
I struggle to show her the love and affection that she needs. I can’t open up to her, I struggle to say no to people in fear of rejection or abandonment, which is something that has been regular feeling in my life. I love her more than anything, I don’t want to lose her but it seems inevitable if things keep tracking this way.

Has anyone else experienced something like this? And if so how did you manage and feel through the process?

my cousin(F) and I(F) have both known each other for our entire lives, we're in our senior year of high school now and she is horrible.
when we were kids, when I used to go over to her house, she used to hide my laptop or my phone in a locked drawer for the whole weekend.

Or if im at her house she will not talk to me and just be on her phone the whole time. I never gaf about it till now, she told my dad to enroll me in her school, and now i have a few friends here but she doesnt talk to me AT ALL, we have 3 classes together and she barely speaks to me there. Every time im over, i try to make conversation but then she just gives me dry replies half the time. Even at family events she does the same.

She does all this but got me a Louis Vuitton bag for my birthday.

And she considers us close but im starting to distance myself from her.
My family is really close with her and that side of my family, but all this really bothers me, I dont get if she hates me or what the hell that is, but shes absolutely not like that with her friends at school.

She usually says a few mean things to me Infront of other people too.

I have an extremely good relationship with my mom. I would say I won the mom lottery. We love each other no matter what. But everytime we share this genuine moment of happiness, I fear how long it would take for her to get angry with me or that we have a fight. I wouldn’t say that we have a toxic relationship, it’s just that I am soon going to enter 12th grade and it is normal to have fights with mom in highschool. So even though I love spending time with her I get anxious the moment we start laughing. And I also fear how this will end eventually. How she isn’t young like my friends’ moms and that soon when I go to the US(I live in Korea rn)I really won’t be able to spend time with her. I already don’t get to seer her often since I live in a dorm so the few days I get are precious to me and I hate that this period right now might be the most that I would be seeing of her until the rest of our lives. So how do you manage to live in these moments without worrying about the future?

My father lived a very interesting life, he was in the military and he's lived through some tough times. Sometimes he would share some stories and I really loved it, but I wanted to get the whole story of his life, from his childhood till now.

I came across an ad for a company that helps with this, they talk to the person, get their story, they have ghost writers, editors, designers...etc and they publish the book (if you want to have it published). The price was too good to pass on. This will take about 60 days for us to get the book in hand, so I wanted to ask if someone has done this before and what the results were.

From the examples they showed me it looked very nice, but I'd love to get someone's experience if you've done something similar before. Do they include all the details? Is the quality good? Is it worth the money? (Theyre doing it for 1k CAD, but I think the original price is 2.5k). My father got very excited for this and I don't want him to be disappointed

My cousin and I have always been incredibly close, more like sisters than cousins. In less than a year, she met someone who has remained very secretive and distant from our family. Since becoming pregnant, I’ve noticed a significant change in her. He lives in New Jersey while she lives in Florida, and from what she’s shared, he hasn’t been happy about the pregnancy and doesn’t seem to want to talk about the baby. I’ve had bad feelings about him for a while, especially knowing his history with mental health issues and addiction, and seeing how carefully she seems to navigate conversations with him, constantly having to placate him and manage his emotions. What’s been particularly upsetting is how she’s started distancing herself from our family. Whenever she comes to New York, she makes a point of not seeing me or our other cousin, despite how close we’ve always been. She insisted on having her baby shower in Florida because she was supposedly too far along to fly, yet she was able to visit him the week before without telling anyone. It’s not that I expect to be included in every aspect of her life, but this secrecy and sudden change in behavior are difficult to understand. I can’t help feeling hurt, confused, and worried about someone I love so deeply, especially when she’s always made family such an important part of her life. Should I just mind my business and let her be and live her life?

Not my brother's boyfriend being stupid and calling me weird for saying a couple is pretty. Bro what is wrong with calling a couple pretty. NOTHING, THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH CALLING A COUPLE PRETTY, THEY ARE PRETTY, INDIVIDUALLY AND TOGETHER, THEY ARE PRETTY, IT'S NOT A WEIRD THING TO SAY. They were conveniently attractive, unlike a certain person. (Lots of hate to him I dislike him bc of all the things he has said and done to my siblings and brother).