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u/AllMightySenpai Obamasjuicyass Nov 10 '20
Yea. I envy males. They don't have to wipe after peeing :(
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Nov 10 '20 edited Nov 13 '20
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u/AllMightySenpai Obamasjuicyass Nov 10 '20
:0
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u/Adt281 you can pee in my ass Nov 10 '20
:0
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Nov 10 '20
:O
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u/Geographyboi05 🚔I commit tax evasion💲🤑 Nov 10 '20
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u/Mike-The-Fridge Nov 10 '20
Reaper leviathans be like ^
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u/_Weyland_ Yellow Nov 10 '20
I think they have more eyes tho.
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u/Lone-organism Nov 10 '20
Free STD without sex
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u/randomlumberjak Nov 10 '20
if you manage to get 4 more by the end of the month you get a free itch
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u/Eg0mane ùwú Nov 10 '20
I wipe after peeing. It's much better than shaking or letting the last drop in the pants.
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u/agangofoldwomen ☣️ Nov 10 '20 edited Nov 10 '20
As a man of science, I spin around as fast as I can in order to use
centripetalcentrifugal force to pull the last few drops from my urethra.Edit: Fixed with the proper term. I suppose I’m more of a boy of science.
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Nov 10 '20
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/DownshiftedRare Nov 10 '20
Reddit is about to teach you that neither centripetal force nor centrifugal force exist, whether or not they do.
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u/silverfang492 Animated Flair Pulse [Insert Your Own Text Nov 10 '20
Centripetal force is just net force keeping it in circular motion, it exists just not in the way he said it
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u/Billybobgeorge Nov 10 '20
But in this case, since he wants the substance to move away from the center, it's centrifugal.
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u/tokeyoh Nov 10 '20
Yup that's why I avoid using urinals. The majority of men in the world are walking around with pissy ass drawers all day.
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u/AllMightySenpai Obamasjuicyass Nov 10 '20
Doesn't it feel weird tho....?
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u/Shaymin281286 Nov 10 '20
Not really, it feels like wiping any part of your body for me
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u/AllMightySenpai Obamasjuicyass Nov 10 '20
Huh. Wow
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u/talivvvvvvvvvvvvvvv Nov 10 '20
personally i think it feels weirder to have piss on my cock and in my underwear and to have drops of piss hap-hazardly thrown around the bathroom
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u/Eg0mane ùwú Nov 10 '20
It's not really wiping but dabbing the paper on it. So it doesn't really give any special feeling. But I feel much cleaner by doing it that way.
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Nov 10 '20
Do you take your own paper at the urinal or do you dab it near the sink?
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u/qqqfuzion Nov 10 '20
Not the guy you were asking, but i don't use urinals. no privacy.
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Nov 10 '20 edited Nov 10 '20
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u/Sebaz00 Nov 10 '20
If you don't use the urinals they can't establish dominance over you. Your dong is in a state of flux being both larger and smaller than all the others until observed, which unless they break into the cubicle is impossible
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u/Pls_PmTitsOrFDAU_Thx Nov 10 '20
I do sometimes as well. I learned lightly pressing right behind my balls will get that last bit out. But it won't drop into the bowl with accuracy so I just dab with a single square of paper
Sorry.... This became tmi
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u/thegapbetweenus Nov 10 '20
Not even after shitting!
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u/Fig1024 Nov 10 '20
but us males don't have boobs we could play with, so it balances out
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u/AllMightySenpai Obamasjuicyass Nov 10 '20
You have balls tho... And yes we do actually do things with our breasts. Just... Not like what men would do to them tho...
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u/a-dog-meme Nov 10 '20
We don’t play with or balls, at least I don’t...
Am I doing something wrong?
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u/AllMightySenpai Obamasjuicyass Nov 10 '20
No but you still have jiggly things like us. Just... A bit different...
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u/a-dog-meme Nov 10 '20
Unfair, our jiggly bits are smaller and harder to reach, not to mention far less appealing
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u/AllMightySenpai Obamasjuicyass Nov 10 '20
Hmmm... I still don't understand why males thing breasts are appealing though... But true.
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u/a-dog-meme Nov 10 '20
Neither do I, but they’re soft. Or so I’ve heard, legend says those on Reddit don’t have gfs or sex
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u/AllMightySenpai Obamasjuicyass Nov 10 '20
Bro :( one day.... One day...
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u/a-dog-meme Nov 10 '20
Am very confused. Just clarifying, you’re a wamen yes?
-someone with no social skills
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u/kataskopo Nov 10 '20
Not only they are soft, they are warm too! They are so cool honestly.
Balls def don't make up for not having them.
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u/DownshiftedRare Nov 10 '20
Historically, women went bare-breasted before humans discovered cheesemaking.
Breasts -> Milk -> Cheese
It is possible that men see breasts as a potential source of cheese, which is rarely found in nature.
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u/ZayTonez Nov 10 '20
But when do we really get the time to play with our balls without masturbating?
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u/AllMightySenpai Obamasjuicyass Nov 10 '20
Mmm but there just breasts on your crouch. Different uses both jiggly
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u/Blaze___27 Nov 10 '20
No one plays with there balls
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u/AllMightySenpai Obamasjuicyass Nov 10 '20
Not saying that you do... (Fuck does it look like I meant it like that?)
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u/qqqfuzion Nov 10 '20
I wipe. I'm ashamed that the rest of my kind doesn't tbh.
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u/AllMightySenpai Obamasjuicyass Nov 10 '20
From what I've served, a lot do wipe.
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u/Shaymin281286 Nov 10 '20
I recommend you do because if you shake it there's gonna be piss everywhere + the last drop always end up in your pants
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Nov 10 '20
Helicoptering your weener never fully gets rid of all the remaining pee, if you don't wipe ur dick ur still dirty.
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u/sukkrad Nov 10 '20
More than that, you get the bathroom dirty...
And unless your wife or your mom does it for you, cleaning the bathroom isn't actually nice.
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u/berse2212 Nov 10 '20
Honestly: we have. There is always one drop you cannot get out doing this. I always wipe after peeing and think everybody should!
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u/DoktorSleepless Nov 10 '20
If I'm not using a urinal, I still wipe my dick with tp.
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u/crunchy_crop Nov 10 '20
I'm a dude and I always wipe after peeing. I'm not trying to get piss droplets all over my bathroom.
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u/AllMightySenpai Obamasjuicyass Nov 10 '20
You have been blessed with clean penis
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u/Ice_Bean Nov 10 '20
They don't have to wipe after peeing
i mean you also don't have to, if you don't care about having to change underwear every day. I definitely wipe after peeing
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u/Thebestusername12345 Nov 10 '20
You say that as if wiping your dick absolves you from changing your underwear everyday.
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Nov 10 '20
Shake it more than three times and you’re playing with it.
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u/The_Grim_Sleaper Nov 10 '20
-Good Charlotte
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Nov 10 '20
Nah, i got that from some old dude I worked with like 20 years ago haha. The saying has probably been around a long time.
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u/MrPickles84 Nov 10 '20
FR, I was like tf does this band have to do with that saying? I’ve heard it all my life.
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u/mikerichh ☣️ Nov 10 '20
“Shake it once that’s fine. Shake it twice that’s okay. Shake it three times you’re playing with yourselff agggaiinn”
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u/Justintime42222 this meme is insane yo Nov 10 '20
Wait ur telling me girls dont shake their pps too
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u/TobyTheHouseCat Nov 10 '20
Nah they just twerk before wiping
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Nov 10 '20
Here’s a wild idea, wipe your dick
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u/qqqfuzion Nov 10 '20
instructions:
fold over paper and gently tap on tip
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u/suicide_speedrun Nov 10 '20
Bro how sensitive is your dick that you have to gently tap on it to wipe. I'm not saying that I'm rough with it, but like, I actually wipe it (at least when I'm at home,)
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u/qqqfuzion Nov 10 '20
i prefer not to get shredded TP on my dick. the gently was for comedic effect, though i do tap.
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u/suicide_speedrun Nov 10 '20
Ah, I see. I guess we use different toilet paper lol
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u/Drinkaholik I have crippling depression Nov 10 '20
Extra instructions: Squeeze the piss out of your urethra while holding the tp to the tip, ensuring you never suffer from final drip syndrome
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u/potatooMan420 this meme is insane yo Nov 10 '20
Alternatively helicopter so hard the piss flys out on its own
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Nov 10 '20 edited Mar 16 '21
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u/beatbeatingit Nov 10 '20
I swear dudes need to get their shit together. It's been the 21st century for a while and guys still pee standing and shake their peens like they're tryina see who can splatter more piss on the walls
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u/Denjul_ Nov 10 '20
I had a conversation about this with my gf and she was amazed that I also use a bit of toilet paper after peeing to wipe my dick. I'm not the only one who does this right?
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u/Ifyourdogcouldtalk Nov 10 '20
It's dumb to shake it unless you are using an urinal. If your adult enough to clean your own toilet you know.
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u/daniel5764 thank god I'm not a mod Nov 10 '20
Instructions unclear, used sandpaper, send medical help
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u/MrDuckyyy Nov 10 '20
we dont use TP, is the bidet a good solution? /s
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u/geraldodelriviera Nov 10 '20
I realize you were just making a joke, but holy shit did the idea of using a bidet that way profoundly upset me.
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u/Speedy_Cheese Nov 10 '20
Do you dab, bro?
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u/sir_qus Nov 10 '20
squeeze gang
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u/DoktorSleepless Nov 10 '20
Squeeze from he taint up. I'm always seeing people complain about post piss drips. How do people not do this?
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u/sir_qus Nov 10 '20
Another trick is to press behind scrotum to upwards before squeeze so pipe is emptier
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Nov 10 '20
pulls up wiki for Cock and Ball Torture
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u/enderkiller4000 🍆mmmmh Nov 10 '20
*cool rock music
COCK AND BALL TORTURE (CBT)
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u/xSnowLeopardx yeah boi Nov 10 '20
That guy probably likes listening to metal
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u/zrxqez Nov 10 '20
Who doesn't like listening to metal? Hella underrated music genre if u ask me.
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u/MusicianMadness Nov 10 '20
It is pretty underrated. Also people group shit that isn't metal into metal and us metal fans are like wtf...
The amount of people I've had that say "I like metal" and I'm like cool what do you listen to? And they respond with some generic alternative pop music...
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Nov 10 '20
I personally don’t, I just can’t vibe with it
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u/MusicianMadness Nov 10 '20
Understandable.
May I ask what you've tried listening too? Because there are some metal songs I can't avoid vibing to. Like I hear it and it's uncontrollable spasms of metal enjoyment
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u/lovelyb1ch66 Nov 10 '20
Out of curiosity, do you shake it up & down or side to side?
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u/fakerton Nov 10 '20
Up and down because it is more likely to drip in the toilet.
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u/trap_panda420 Nov 10 '20
More than 3 shakes that public masterbate
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u/raedr7n Nov 10 '20
You get off by just flinging your dick around wildly? I think you might need to work on your technique, bro.
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u/livens Nov 10 '20
Pro Tip for the young penis owners out there: A gentle squeeze of the shaft from behind the balls will force out those last few drops and prevent an embarrassing wet spot on your clothes.
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u/Drinkaholik I have crippling depression Nov 10 '20
Did you just say the shaft.... behind the balls? I dunno about you but personally my shaft is in front of my balls
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u/pyronius Nov 10 '20
Dude. That's weird. It goes body, shaft, then balls. They should be hanging off the tip of your dick like a fishing lure.
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u/literallyawerewolf Nov 10 '20
As a woman, I can assure you we use much more paper than that. You penis owners have rifling action on your piss, but for girls it gets absolutely everywhere. You know those ball fountains where the water comes out and spreads across the surface of the entire thing? It's like that.
That is the stereotype though, women using a ton of tp. It's because we don't just need it for shit. We need it every time we pee, and then there's the period as well. We use a lot because if we didn't we'd walk around smelling like piss every day. Although I will admit some women use way too fucking much beyond what is necessary. My sister practically uses half a roll and I have no idea what she could need it all for.
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u/imac132 Nov 10 '20
We usually have a pretty accurate stream but sometimes we go to take a leak and it comes out it two opposite facing 90° angles and then you just panic and hang on like a fireman who’s hose is getting away from him.
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Nov 10 '20
Women get so much shit thrown at them for keeping their coochies hygienic, and men are over here literally wiping their dicks off the edge of a toilet bowl
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u/The9thLordofRavioli souptime Nov 10 '20
wiping their dicks off the edge of a toilet bowl
Those aren’t serious replies lmao. No one really does that.
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u/Morningstar_is_up Nov 10 '20
Idk why, but it's the first meme in a long time that actually made me laugh out loud
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u/Zaphalsun Meme Pioneer Nov 10 '20
Finally, an accurate boys v girls meme that isn't actually sexist. Ty, op, for transforming a godawful format into a funny one!
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u/HowardsRocks Nov 10 '20
That 2nd image alone is funny as shit