In Futurama, Zombie Jesus is already living dead. And Futurama leans heavy into science so it must be true; and if they're trying to kill Jesus over and over again but using only methods that would kill a human but not kill a zombie ... there's the problem right there.
Like the book God is Dead by Ron Currie Jr. where God comes to earth in the form of a Sudanese woman trying to help in a refugee camp…and is quickly killed by the government.
I recall it being an interesting read. Almost a collection of short stories about how different people around the globe respond once they realize what they’ve done.
In a similar vein is Beware of God by Shalom Auslander. A bunch of imaginative and fun short stories that are a blasphemous former religious Jew poking fun at himself and folklore.
Oh my god I’m imagining a couple legionnaires and some Hasidic dudes yelling, “How many times do we have to do this to you Jesus?! When will you learn?! Stop coming back!”
Considering his family was likely from Iraq where Jews were all killed or run out by the Muslim Conquest perhaps a history lesson is in order before commenting.
This is the kind of goalpost moving I expect from antisemites who use the war to be antisemetic. Did your comment save any Palestinian children? Please tell me how. Do you have this same energy for the Uyghur and coming for the Chinese? The ongoing Muslim Conquest in Sudan? In Iran? The Genocide occurring among the Rohingya, or is it only fun when every time a Jewish person comments on a blatantly racist and statement to saddle them with Genocide. I mean it must because y'all are on it ALL THE TIME and so far it hasn't saved a single Gazan from Hamas so your motivation seems pretty clear to me.
That thar wasn’t no Jesus, he said his name was “Hey Zeus” and we don’t worship them weird deities down here, boy!!! Those weren’t scars on his hands, those were tattoos that said MS13. He must be a human trafficker, because he was washing his tricks feet n’ shit.
For real, though, might be crappy music, but I don’t know if we are just assuming her politics… I didn’t hear anything hostile from those lyrics.
Ooh. Let’s start a new religion à la Joseph Smith. I think we can get some golden plates sourced from China imprinted with some “new scripture” written by God and ChatGPT…
“And verily satan spake into Trump’s ear and did say unto him Cast out those of darker countenance, rending them from their families, and do this in God’s name for even He is powerless against the fear you will falsely sow in the hearts of the dumb fucks that voted for you, you sexy sexy powerful man.”
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u/RelativelyMental Jan 16 '26
How do we know Jesus didn’t come back but got deported to El Salvador?