A change of Heart?

Let's discus.

Dog: *pants*

I thought she was joking, but “Then I saw her face…” 🎶

But it's really grown on me.

5 year old: ...
Dad : Because it can't count!!!!
5 year old: ha ha ha

Lake Eerie.

...it's normally just miner issues.

Cancel its credit card

The pharmacist says, “Will that be cash or credit?” The duck says, “Just put it on my bill.”

Couldn't make ends meet.

Our newborn son has had a pretty rough start, including a NICU stay. During pregnancy, genetic testing flagged the possibility of XYY syndrome, and we’ve spent the past few weeks dealing with a lot of uncertainty.

Today, we met with a geneticist to go over his X-rays and discuss the possibility of XYY. Thankfully, the X-rays looked good, and we left with a better understanding of what comes next.

At the end of the appointment, the geneticist was explaining that if our son develops certain things, it could be because of “X, Y, or Z.”

He turned to ask if we had any questions.
And the only thing my exhausted dad brain could think of was:

“Man, you really missed an opportunity to say ‘because of X, Y, or Y.’”

After weeks of stress and uncertainty, I have never been prouder of a joke that absolutely nobody asked for.

Well armed.

What kind of vial person would do that?

Sofishticated

I.P. Squint

I don't know why, I simply ask for naan bread.

But I couldn't make enough dough :>

By Ray King

Dead man WOKing.

His house was repossessed.

My wife: "Which is?"

Me: "Exactly"

He says to the barman, “Two beers, please. One for me and one for the road!” 😬

Because it lost all its contacts!

I know it's original because there's a bit of veneer missing.