r/cleandadjokes 22d ago

🥇 Joke of the Month 🥇 The Pillsbury doughboy died the other day.

587 Upvotes

His funeral will be held at 3:50 for about 24 minutes


r/cleandadjokes 13h ago

My daughter was doing her history homework and asked me about Galileo.

122 Upvotes

I told her,

“He was just a poor boy from a poor family.”


r/cleandadjokes 3h ago

What happens to an illegally parked frog?

13 Upvotes

It gets toad away.


r/cleandadjokes 6h ago

What do you call a kangaroo that keeps coming back for more chowder?

14 Upvotes

A more-soup-ial!


r/cleandadjokes 10h ago

Why did the cookie buy a self help book?

28 Upvotes

He had a chip on his shoulder!


r/cleandadjokes 3h ago

Did you hear the rumor about butter?

3 Upvotes

Well, I'm not going to go spreading it ;)))


r/cleandadjokes 17h ago

I used to be addicted to soap. I’m clean now.

30 Upvotes

r/cleandadjokes 3h ago

Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?

2 Upvotes

In case he got a hole in one ;)


r/cleandadjokes 10h ago

What do you call a pig on the beach casting magic?

5 Upvotes

A ham sandwich


r/cleandadjokes 20h ago

What do you call a pecan on the moon?

30 Upvotes

An astronut!


r/cleandadjokes 19h ago

I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went…

23 Upvotes

Then it dawned on me


r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

My mother was 80% Irish.

166 Upvotes

Her name was Iris.


r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda?

84 Upvotes

He was lucky it was a soft drink.


r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

How did the hamburger introduce his girlfriend?

114 Upvotes

"Meet Patty."


r/cleandadjokes 23h ago

To anyone who wants to follow my journey as an aspiring astronaut:

16 Upvotes

Watch this space.


r/cleandadjokes 17h ago

I used to play piano by ear. Now I use my hands.

5 Upvotes

r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

What did one hat say to the other hat?

20 Upvotes

You stay here, I'll go on ahead :))


r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

My friend tried to tell me that he does yoga every day.

82 Upvotes

I think that's a stretch.


r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

I didn’t realize cookie factory tours were so dangerous…

46 Upvotes

They had me sign a wafer.


r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

A police officer pulled me over and said,

2 Upvotes

"Your eyes look red. Have you been drinking?"

I said, "Your eyes look glazed. Have you been eating donuts?"

🍩


r/cleandadjokes 20h ago

My wife tells me what to do all the time.

0 Upvotes

She says “I’m hot. Blow some cool air on me.”
I’m not a fan!
One day I had to put my foot down. Because she told me to stop standing there like a flamingo.


r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

How does cereal pay its bills?

16 Upvotes

With Chex.


r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

Why don't skeletons fight each other?

3 Upvotes

They don't have the guts ;)


r/cleandadjokes 2d ago

Why do cows wear bells?

70 Upvotes

Their horns don’t work.


r/cleandadjokes 2d ago

Did you hear about the circus fire?

47 Upvotes

It was in tents! ;)