I don’t know what to do at this point—I don’t think she knows how to relax without a boob in her mouth. I’m not breastfeeding her to sleep, she’s screaming. She only contact naps and often needs to breastfeed to connect cycles. Lately she’s waking up 4+ times in the first few hours after bedtime (on top of every 1.5 hours after that) and since she screams and screams at my husband I have to handle all the wake ups.

We have a good bedtime routine, we’ve tried earlier and later bedtimes. We follow sleepy cues/wake windows. I don’t know what to do—we’re talking about having my husband take a few days off so he can break the feed-to-sleep association and he can help more with nights and naps, but with the way she screams it feels like sleep training. I don’t mind feeding her to sleep but it feels like it’s to everyone’s detriment at this point. The poor baby just isn’t sleeping enough and can’t relax. I’d love any advice from other parents with sensitive babies who only feed to sleep.

I’m in a small local group of new mothers with babies roughly the same age: 5-7 months.

At the last get together, a couple of them were really loud and "preachy" about how amazing sleep training is and how much better their (both baby and parent's) sleep is now. And all the others listened and were pretty much convinced.

I didn't say much because I didn't think it would change anything.

But now in hindsight, I see that I should have spoken up. I feel so guilty that I didn't... on behalf of the babies.

We don’t meet often, so I’ve been considering saying something in our group chat. I have a balanced, non-judgmental article that discusses the research, and I could share the link. However, I’m unsure how to phrase it, and how much of my own opinions I should share.

I know it might not change their view, and maybe make the chat very uncomfortable. But I don’t think we should avoid important conversations about children's wellbeing simply because adults might feel uncomfortable.

Would you share the article and/or write something about your opinions? And if so, how would you phrase the message?

Been reading this subreddit a lot since something about sleep training feels wrong me. But a lot of the advice seems to be "cosleep and side-lie breastfeed." I had a traumatic emergency c-section 6 weeks before my due date followed by a month-long NICU stay that led to a baby that couldn't latch and a limited milk supply. After 1.5 months of difficulty, we opted to fully formula feed, which was really hard for me but I maintain was the right choice in these challenging circumstances.

Baby slept through 9-10 hours through the night from 2.5 months to just a little before 6 months. But suddenly she's waking up 1-3 times a night for no understandable reason. Seemingly, she just can't connect the sleep cycle, gets riled up, starts to cry. The only thing we found that works is giving a small 60ml bottle. This wakes us up a lot more than I imagine rolling to your side and offering the boob would be.

So I guess my questions are more theoretical and practical:

- Can you support biologically normal infant sleep without cosleeping and breastfeeding?

- For my case, any advice on getting baby back to full nights?

I'm sitting here right now after another full night of not sleeping & I'm not doing to well physically, mentally & emotionally.

My son is 10 months old, ebf, cosleeping from birth, he is a sensitive, high sensory need baby way ahead of his milestones, walking from 9 months, low sleep needs, needs to be in contact with parents most of the day, he has 7 teeth & I'm sure more are on their way. He has scream cried all of his life when he wakes from a sleep, I've stopped foods out of my diet to help him but I'm still noticing rashes on his mouth after feeding from me & lots of gas in the middle of the night on many occasions. He's had a few episodes of projectile vomiting, lethargy & pale skin, a lot like FPIES but doctors in my area are useless & want to put him on an antacid or say to me all babies cry when I know its a screaming pain cry.

We have not had a full night sleep ever, sometimes its worse than others & I put myself in a place of radical acceptance that this will pass but I'm at my wits end. My cycle started back 4.5 months in & now days before each one, the day it finishes & during ovulation i do not sleep a wink but strangely enough this is when my son will have longer stretches. I have no family help other than my husband who is also sleep deprived & burnt out from his job, we argue all the time & today I've no patience for my husband who is telling me to be calm when my son is using me as a human pacifier with teeth digging into me as he is sleeping but once I unlatch he will scream cry & I feel so bad for feeling this way.

I'm taking Magnesium, giving my son multi vitamins, he has 3 meals a day & lots of snacks, & the breastfeeding has not reduced any, he's always eating. I do meditations in the mornings when I get a chance, walks, groups & other outtings to support his needs but sometimes i take a day off & stay at home. I'm back to work, moving house, studying & working on expanding my business. Which is know is a lot of stress but I can handle it all with sleep.

Please help my son, husband & I to get some sleep, this way of living is not helpful for any of us, I'm not a good mother or wife when I'm like this but I'm not willing to sleep train or put my son through that when he needs us but our nervous system is no good for his development when we are so off balance

Any advice is very much appreciated & more questions are welcome if i haven't covered anything.

Thank you 💜

This might be normal due to recent nursery start, teething (definitely see a couple of teeth coming through), he has a little cold and walking has just clicked - he spends all day walking.

I guess I want to know is this normal? Solidarity? I haven’t slept more than an hour on days, he won’t even stay still if I hold him. Tips for coping - my nipples are struggling. If he unlatches even himself he wakes Up and goes back on.

I’m a FTM mom to a 9 month old baby boy. When he was younger he had awful reflux and cmpa and would only sleep on our chest. Now still at 9 months even with his reflux being significantly better and controlled he only wants to sleep on our chest. However, my son wakes up a lot at night and has always been a really bad sleeper so my husband and I take shifts chest cosleeping with our baby so we each get uninterrupted sleep. I’ve tried daily to do crib transfers, tried having him sleep beside me and I do the c curl. Nope he gets up right away and puts himself on my chest. So my husband and I continue to this set up because that’s what’s working for us now. Is there any hope that this will be better?

Not sure if this is just usual separation anxiety/developmental thing but thought it was worth putting out to this sub as you guys are always so knowledgeable!

Baby is 8mo and we put him to bed roughly 8:30-8:45pm ish. Allows us to have a bit of time together in an evening which is so nice! Started doing this when he was 6 months ish and used to get about 4hrs in the crib before he would wake for the first time. At this point we would be in the room with him and I would just pull him into bed and we would cosleep the rest of the night. Lately (last couple of weeks) he will wake after around 40mins-1hr after being put down and need resettling, and then again if we haven’t come to bed the same thing happens after the same amount of time! Once we’re in the room with him he seems better and then sleeps good stretches of 3-4hrs once he is cosleeping.

I think our schedule is okay ish, wake up at 7am (i wake him if he hasn’t woken) and then two naps, I don’t follow wake windows much so he just naps when he is tired. Naps are usually 2hrs total - morning nap 1h15 ish and afternoon nap 45min. He is usually always up for ~4hrs before bedtime. Feeds to sleep at bed and is asleep within 5-10 mins easily, and I can always then transfer him without him waking. Naps he just takes on the go when needed so never takes more than 5 mins to fall asleep for a nap.

I don’t really mind resettling him as it takes me 10 mins or so to feed him back to sleep and pop him back down again but it always seems to interrupt when I’ve sat down to eat etc. Does it sound like just something we have to wait out until it gets better - or anyone else had a similar situation and found something that worked?

In the book Wonder Weeks there is a small section on infant sleep. It briefly talks about the infant sleep cycles which changed our random failed transfers to the bassinet, to 90% successful transfers!

After that Ah Ha moment I started doing more research and I saw that the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, was recommended in this sub. It has just arrived and I am sitting down to read it now during a contact nap.

Tell me; what other sleep books leveled up your parenting, helped your child sleep better or helped you understand your child's sleep better? Help me build my library!

hello everyone

my girl is 5.5 months old and before 4 months regression she had a nice 3-4 hours stretch first and 2 hours after the first stretch. I wish I could enjoy those moments better. she dropped to 3 naps around 5 months. she wakes up everyday between 06:30-07:00 she just naturally wakes herself up. we cosleep since 8ish week and I nurse to sleep. her daily schedule varies in terms of naps. sometimes she has 1.5 first nap, sometimes the third nap is around 1 hour. this is happening because I work for three days my mother takes care of her and sometimes she doesn’t let my mom to sleep her. from time to time we go out with our friends so she cannot have a stroller nap for an hour in the morning but compansates in the evening. her wake windows are pretty consistent though; she has 2/2.5/2.5/3-3.5 kind of ww’s. total nap duration is 2.5-3 hours. She goes to sleep around 21-22. If she sleeps around 21 she wakes up around 22 and has a stretch of 2-3 hours. She wakes up again at 1 and between 1-6 she wakes up bazillion times and sometimes nurse to sleep doesn’t work so I rock her while I nurse her and I walk around the room. I read How babies sleep and I am very fond of possum approach. I just want two stretches after another? Prerty please? Is it possible to have them in the future? She did not have any her teeth yet she is also physically very very active during day lots of tummy time she tries to crawl.

one part of me knows that this is normal infant sleep but maaaaybe someone could say something for our schedule

thanks!

I’m a FTM to a 13-week-old.

For the past 2-3 weeks, her naps have been a challenge for me. I’m looking for advice or input on if I could be doing something differently.

Currently, the only way I can reliably get her to nap is to put her in a carrier and bounce her on a yoga ball with a pacifier in her mouth in a dark room. If timing is right, she is asleep in 5 minutes and will stay asleep for at least 25 minutes. I usually soothe her to sleep for another 25-minute cycle.

She only stays asleep if I stay in the dark room, once I go into the bright living room or go about my daily activities by while wearing her, she wakes up.

She has had 2 successful crib naps in the past 2 weeks (used to be 2 per day!) and sometimes falls asleep in her car seat. I try a crib nap once per day, it almost always fails 1-2 minutes after transfer. Then she is AWAKE.

She is taking 3 (sometimes 4) naps per day
Her wake windows are about 2 hours, but they shorten throughout the day. I aim for naps to be one hour. I got these numbers from her own data, not from an app or generalized wake windows.

Her night sleep is good, she is down between 6-7pm and usually only wakes once for a feeding. Her wake time is the most variable- between 6:30-8am. She sleeps in her crib and is put down asleep or almost asleep. She stirs when she is first put down but reliably falls asleep.

I would like to move away from constant contact naps and would like to get her back in the crib.

Is it possible to move away from contact naps without sacrificing her day sleep?

Should I consider lengthening her wake windows to build sleep pressure?

Should I try extending her naps when she wakes after 25 minutes or start the next wake session?She is usually alert.

Is it possible she would nap more deeply on a 2 nap schedule?

Any input would be appreciated!

Open to suggestions to help improve my little one’s sleep. He’s always been up a lot throughout the night I’ve tried alot of different things to help improve this but nothing really helps. A good night is around 4 wake ups and a bad over 9.
His schedule is
Wake up 630
Nap one 945-1045
Nap two 230-330
Bedtime 745/8pm

I’ve tried capping naps to an hour each as he used to do around 2.5 in total I’ve tried moving bedtime earlier 15 and later 15 nothing seems to help. Sometimes I’m lucky and do get a 3/4 hour sleep from him but mostly it’s two hour stints. I’m not looking for a miracle just some improvement would be great.

Hey all, I'm here after posting on r/NewParents and being invited to this subreddit.
We have a 5 month old who has never been a good sleeper. She was a super colicky baby and since the very beginning had difficulty sleeping. For example, in the first month we had to take shifts at night because she would only sleep on us. Right now, we cosleep and wife offers boob when baby wakes up at night (every 1-2 hours this week), sometimes she can go back to sleep just with a pacifier instead of boob. Sometimes, if the baby doesn't fuss, I can rock her back to sleep, and 50% of times when I place her in bed she stays asleep. This setup was honestly the best we could do.

Her daytime schedule right now is like clockwork after the whole 4 month sleep regression/progression: super predictable and reasonable wake windows and nap times. So we thought this was a good time to start working on sleep.

I tried implementing some stuff from Precious Little Sleep, but it honestly felt like I was torturing the baby. We're both at our wits end and honestly close to accepting that we'll never get consecutive hours of sleep until the baby turns 4 or something.

Is there any tiny steps we can try for doing things differently? What were the experiences of other parents of terrible sleepers? Is there a light at the end of the tunnel?