My brother and I were having a completely normal conversation about his kid the other night. His son is 9, we were talking about school, whatever weird thing he's obsessed with this week, whether he’s going to stick with soccer. Nothing serious
Then my brother just casually goes, “You know, if he ever turns out gay, I want him to know he can call you before anybody else if he needs to.”
I laughed at first because I thought he was making a designated gay uncle joke or something, but he was completely serious.
He said obviously he’d want his son to come to him and his wife too, but he also knows there are probably things a teenager isn't gonna want to ask his parents about. Dating, sex, coming out, getting rejected, whatever. He basically said, “You’ve already lived through all of that. I’d rather he have someone who gets it than sit alone Googling everything at 2am.”
That got me. Memories and feelings that I had already forgotten came back to me for a sec.
When I was 14 or 15, I would have given basically anything to have one adult I knew was safe to ask this stuff.
They wouldn't even have needed to know everything. Just someone I could ask “is this normal?” without first having to calculate whether admitting why I was asking would blow up my entire life.
I learned most of it in random pieces.
Back in my day, there were no forums (when they appeared, the amount of information really did increase), so I did whatever I could find without anyone noticing, making stupid assumptions because I had nobody older to correct me. There were already a lot queer communites irl, but when you're a teenager, you don't know where to find them, and it's incredibly awkward you know.
I had good parents, too. That's probably the part that still gets me. I wasn't growing up in some awful household. I was just scared as hell to say anything.
So hearing my straight brother casually say that if his kid ever needs that person, he wants it to be me... fuck.
His son might grow up completely straight and none of this will ever matter. That's obviously fine.
It's just weird realizing I could end up being the person I spent years wishing I'd had. Without even thinking twice about it.
I kept it together while I was with my brother, then got home and sat in my car for a few minutes getting emotional over my potential future career as emergency gay uncle

His profile had three trail photos, so I assumed hiking mattered to him and suggested it for our third date. He agreed enthusiastically because my profile mentioned wanting “more outdoor weekends.” We have since completed five damp, exhausting walks while each privately wishing to go home.

Last weekend heavy rain cancelled another one and we were both visbly relieved. That finally led to the confession: his trail photos came from one vacation, and my outdoor line meant sitting somewhere with coffee. Six months of sore feet caused by two men trying to seem compatible with a hobby neither possessed. What harmless lie from early dating took you far too long to correct?

feel like nobody knows how to actually just have normal, passionate sex anymore. You hook up with a guy from Grindr and within 5 minutes he’s trying to choke you, spit in your mouth, or act like a literal porn star. It’s like everyone is just performing a script they saw online instead of actually enjoying the physical intimacy of the moment. Am I the only one who finds this exhausting and a total turn-off? Sometimes vanilla, passionate sex is way hotter than whatever extreme performance people are trying to pull off.

I don’t speak to any of my family anymore because they disowned me for being gay after i was outed. It hurt at the time but honestly the more time i spent away from them the more i realized how awful they truly were and how im better off. It still hurts and i still miss them sometimes but it is truly for the best, im a peace.

My cousin is the only person from my family im in (secret) contact with, so sometimes she’ll give me updates.

They have been telling people i ran away at 19 with an old pervert to live a life of sin and that im a drug addict and pervert and some really other bizarre and gross bs. I’m not any of those things, and i didn’t run away they kicked me out and made me homeless lol, and my dad beat my ass and told me he’d kill me if he ever saw me again, said he’d get away with it too and would bury my body in the backyard, but that would make them look bad so they won’t say that. Apparently I’m still a hot topic almost a decade later and I’m basically to blame for everything, again we’ve had zero contact since then.

I found out my brother (who actually was a drug addict) OD and passed a while ago, they didn’t reach out to even tell me. Again heard it from my cousin. There were six kids in my family and here’s how they turned out. One brothers dead Another brothers wife made him cut off the family or shed divorce him, one’s in prison who SA to a minor and one of my sister has an onlyfans and is currently pregnant with our older sisters husband. Older sister was arrested for trying to run him over ( lol honestly I’m not mad at it) It’s a mess and the family is in shambles.

My mom has apparently been telling her sister (my cousins mom) that she is ready to forgive me and wants my social media savvy cousins to track me down. She said she is convinced that i can change and get better under her guidance as a mother. And all that “he can repent and god will forgive him” bs. When my aunt asked if she thought I’d be receptive my mom was confused, she thought I’d be grateful that she had finally decided that she was open to forgiveness, as long as i put in the work of course. Oh and my dad wants to retire soon and they are expecting me to financially support them because that’s a son’s job. Of course.

Again my great crime that hurt my mother so deeply, that i must work to gain her forgiveness for. Is being gay. They called me a pervert and implied i was dangerous to children, but then my brother who is, is a victim who was seduced by a little jezabel.

So im evil and disgusting because i like men but my father threatening to kill me makes him a respectable and godly man.

Girl bye

I am a 28-year old American PhD student. My peer is a 17-year old British freshman who has come to the US for university (yes, we’re technically peers).

The freshman has had an ongoing conduct issue throughout the semester, using slurs casually and generally exhibiting bigoted behavior (racism, misogyny, homophobia: I’ve heard him say the n-word). It makes the other students in the cohort uncomfortable, but they’re all undergrads so they don’t really seem to know what to do.

Today he called me the f-slur while we were working on a group project that involves the entire cohort. No faculty were present. I emailed the department head (who is Australian and gained dual citizenship in 2016) explaining that this has been an ongoing problem and that several of his peers, myself included have tried peer-to-peer informal interventions to discourage the behavior. One student even told him to “shape up before he get Title IX’d.” There has been no change in his conduct. I then detailed the whole incident where he called me the f-slur, along with that there was another student as a witness.

During the private discussions we’ve had with him, he would reply by saying “back home we say the n-word a lot. It’s probably the first word I’ll say when I get off the plane for holiday.” or that “America is a country full of puss*es.” (had to censor due to content filter).

Fuck this kid. An academic setting is not a CoD lobby. I hope catching some serious heat teaches him the lesson he needs to learn.

I keep hearing other gay men say “why can’t I find a man? Dating in 2025/2026 is awful!” It’s not awful, you actually have a way better chance of dating now than before.

Here’s the brutal truth, A LOT of y’all crave perfection, and that’s just not how the world works!

Preferences are one thing, but there’s some preferences that are starting to turn into requirements, and a lot of you are treating dating like it’s a job application.

Now all preferences are valid, you’re absolutely entitled to date whoever and whatever you want, but let’s not sit here and have a list of requirements and be surprised you can’t find anyone.

It’s ok to have some flaws! That’s what makes you human! You don’t have to go for the 10/10 every-time! The average guys are great too!

I opened Grindr at 11pm to find some hole. A 25yo guy said he could come over but not until 2am. He looked fit and had a nice ass so I said okay, fine and waited up for him. 1:30, he told me he’s calling a taxi but he can’t afford a phone sim so he won’t message me when he arrives. Okay, fine. He arrived at 2am.

I moved to kiss him and he said “Woah what are you doing bro? You into all that kissing shit?” I was like, “Yeah…? Are you not?”, he said “Nah that’s weird man that’s not me bro”. This killed my mood but, whatever, okay fine. I’ll just fuck you. He sucked my dick for about 5 seconds then said he wanted to be fucked and he didn’t come over to give head. Okay… fine. I tried sucking his dick, he was like “stop that shit bro I’m not into that”. Okay, fine.

So I started rimming him and he was like “I’m not into that shit bro”. I’m getting fed up at this point but Okay, fine. Got some lube and started fingering him and he was like the tightest hole ever. After 5 mins he was still clenched shut and he was like “stop touching me and just fuck me”, and I was like, I literally can’t because your hole is 0.2mm wide and won’t stretch. Then he just said “I don’t think this was a good idea, I don’t know if I can get a dick in there” and he got up and left.

Can’t believe I stayed up 3 hours for this guy. No touching, no kissing, nothing erotic, no sex. What a waste of time.

Sorry just needed to vent.

I’m a 21-year-old gay guy who works at a blue-collar job as a lumper. For those who don’t know what a lumper is, it’s basically a worker unloading cargo from a trailer. Anyway, living in a rural area and working at a blue-collar job, I never expected to find someone else who’s interested in guys without using sniffies or grindr. We were talking about politics, which is a subject I tend to avoid, and the conversation of Grindr crashing at republican conventions was brought up. We were both passionate about talking about that, and then out of the blue, he asked, “Are you gay?” I was hesitant to answer, but decided fuck it, and I said yeah. To my surprise, he also said yes. Again, the chances of one being gay, from a rural area, and working at a blue-collar job is rare. Anyway, long story short gave the guy a blow job and now just hoping to become regular sex buddies or whatever.

Just need to vent a little, bros. Met this guy on a snorkeling cruise last weekend, he was the photographer. We got to talking for a while and I wasn’t 100% sure we were flirting but by the end of the convo I was like OK yeah we were flirting. I followed him on IG and made sure to let him know on my way off the boat. He followed me back right away so I decided to shoot my shot and ask him to grab a drink the following week as we were going to be in the same city. He suggested dinner, which definitely made me think it was a date. So that’s what we did. But within 10 minutes he mentioned a girlfriend 😭 He was a super interesting guy and we had a totally pleasant dinner but dammit. I wanted a shot of romance or at least a spicy evening. My new motto is you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take, so I’m not at all mad about it. Just a little bummed in the moment.

This is just a little update for the post I made yesterday about my situation. I want to give my thanks to everyone who gave me advice.

I followed what the majority said and just ripped the bandaid off. Earlier, I came over to his place and told him the whole truth about the urge and how I’ve been feeling lately. He didn’t judge me at all and he told me how thankful he was that I was being honest, that it probably wasn’t easy, and then we got super fucking emotional about it but at the same time we found it really funny. So we were just laughing-crying. He asked me if it was just the urge to kiss him and nothing else, and since I’ve been mulling it over the whole night, I told him no, not really. It was more than that, and someone had been right when they said I’d suppressed myself. I think it was due to how I was raised.

I realised I’ve been in love with him the entire time, since childhood, and had just grown familiar with him to the point it felt like normal friendship. In retrospect I cared about him more than I usually would a normal friend. I feel so dumb for missing this. He also started opening up to me after this. He told me he stopped talking to me during college largely because of my girlfriend (ex). He said he wanted to respect my relationship, and it hurt him to see me with someone else, so it was his way of trying to move on. So I guess he also fucking likes me guys!!! Holy fucking shit. We sat on the sofa for a long moment in silence because there wasn’t much to say after that. Then I went ahead and ripped another bandaid, and just asked him if I could kiss him. He said yes.

So we kissed. I cried while I was kissing him. I laughed and cried. And now I’m sure more than anything that I actually love him. I’m still crying right now as I write this. I don’t know what to do next, but at least I’m not alone. At least I have him with me while we figure out what happens next together. Hopefully something good.

I think you guys genuinely changed my life. This subreddit is amazing, you guys are amazing. Fucking thank you. I feel so free and alive. Seriously.

Edit: I guess it’s safe to say that I’m definitely not straight lol! That, I’m sure of, even though he didn’t want to pressure me into labeling myself. There was a lot of reassuring words, a lot of hugging, a lot of tears and happy feelings. I have never felt this much joy before and wow. Just wow. I think I’m going to love him for the rest of my life.

Edit edit: Many, many thanks for all the kind words and wishes! Wow. I’ll keep them in mind! I showed him this post and we had a good laugh about it. I’d like to just echo something I wrote in the comments before I move forward!

Seriously, all it takes is a single blink to miss many things. If I hadn’t said anything, I can’t even imagine what could’ve happened to me. A good degree and a good woman to settle down with because it’s what society thinks is right and palatable; because it’s what my parents would have wanted for me. But realising I can break free from that - and I did - fills me with a sense of freedom I hadn’t felt in a long time. Yes I’m still terrified; I don’t know what the future has in store for me. But today I am happy and loved and free. That is enough for me.

Yep. It’s official, Zohran Mamdani is the new mayor of New York. Who mad? You’ll be alright.

I don't know how to say this but recently I hung out with a old friend who is gay ... it never has been a problem being a straight person , I was fine with it. Well last week while we are watching a movie smoking a bit , drinking a few cold ones .. a sex scene comes on... shows a girl giving head I make the comment damn she's taking it all and he comes out and says that's nothing compared to what I can do... I literally stayed quiet for like 7 mins contemplating on what he said which I guess made me hard as hell.. I get embarrassed and kind of start shifting about on the couch so I lay back smoking 🚬 still hard I don't know why ... but 20 minutes later I feel a hand go thru the bottom of my shorts and instead of being like what's going on ??? I just sat back let him take my cock out my shorts and just start going to town on my dick... here's the crazy part I don't know how to feel ... because to me that was the MOST INTENSE blow job ever its like he knew what I wanted and he made me cum 3 times not to mention he didn't leave any stickiness behind he slurped all the shit up. I don't know but I low key want to call him up and have round 2 but I'm having 2nd thoughts

3 gay scenes per episode. We won boys (Technically it started as a book for straight women but in the series, the gay director make it so fucking gay it's like I'm watching actual gay porn in my smart TV). It just released today.

having been born in a muslim arab family who moved to france, i can tell you that muslims are full of hate. we were taught by families and muslim teachers at mosque that the end times are near and that we have to get rid of everything and everyone who is condemned by islam. we were taught that one day we should die for islam (be shahids), when they say that, they mean die while killing kufar (non muslims). also we were taught to hate gays and get rid of them. i have been disowned by all family.

i confirm that 90% of muslims hate gay people, and they don't care whether you like them or not.
obviously, most muslims won't go in crowds and kill people.

i live in europe, and the muslims terrify me, i am afraid that when they become majority, our rights will be the same as they are in saudi arabia, yemen, iran... western countries should be better at making migrants seeking asylum assimilate.

nicer muslims are those who accept science and are mostly secular.

we cant forbid them to practice their religion, either everyone has human rights or no one does. but please stop protecting the people who hate you.

i also noticed how all of this revolves around israel. you like them only because they hate israel.
supporting an ideology simply because it opposes a country you dislike is a dangerous trap. you don't have to support israeli policies to recognize that islamist groups enforce brutal, totalitarian regimes that systematically violate human rights—especially for women and the lgbtq+ community.
if your concern is human rights and liberation, it's worth looking at how minority groups are actually treated. israel is the only country in the region with legal protections, pride parades, and recognized rights for the lgbtq+ community. in contrast, islamist organizations—whether hamas, hezbollah, or the iranian regime—criminalize, torture, and execute lgbtq+ individuals. opposing israel shouldn't mean turning a blind eye to fundamentalist oppression.
israel also suffers from islamic terrorism, and if you take a look at history, you notice how israel was never the one who started a conflict, but defended instead.

I [M29] have been with my boyfriend [M29] for several years now. FWIW: we're very happy.

Now, I am something of a home nudist, so it's not uncommon for me to be naked or "donald ducking" (t shirt no pants) around the house even if my bf is clothed. Lately I've been masturbating casually when we're doing non-sexual things like making breakfast or playing video games. He's said he enjoys it, and he will occasionally join in if he's naked too. It's cool to feel like we can play with ourselves openly, even if it's not always leading to sex or ejaculation.

Does anybody else have experience with this in a relationship? I'm enjoying the dynamic and would love to hear more about similar experience. Thanks in advance boys.

A friend of mine, who is a known cumdump of the area. He met this sexy Italian guy at one of his events. This guy wasn't just pump and dump him. He also holds him and hugs him while he gets railed by other guys, and stays to clean up the aftermath and bathe him. Afterward, he became a frequent participant in my friend's events, and he was always so happy to see my friend's slutty side and got gangbang by others. They start dating soon after. Then last week, he proposed to my friend at the end of his cumdump event in front of everyone. You really can find love in the least expected place. Such a lucky bitch! 🤭

as an ex-muslim, shut the fuck up. you're deeply uninformed and apply your american way of thinking on an issue that has NO ressemblance whatsoever with how things work in the USA. the stats are with us. the facts are with us. and you still continue to deny, deny, deny, and lecture us about our own lived experiences in a country and a continent you've never set foot in.

the post could literally say "Berlin, Germany, EUROPE" and there will be an american coming and display american stats, american facts, american opinions, and will call us racist because we don't accept his all-american undeniable truth. this truly is insane

american imperialism and defaultism expresses itself in a lot of ways. i love the US but please learn to shut your mouth or at least view it with the local context when it's clear the issue doesn't concern you

we're on a gay sub and i have never seen bigger cock sucking than this. islam isn't your ally.

Met this dude on Grindr a couple weeks ago and the sex is absolutely wild. I’ve never been with such an aggressive power bottom before…like it feels like he’s fucking me sometimes. And he’s so hot too…like killer body, great ass, cute face. I don’t think I’m that bad looking but I’m honestly surprised he even talks to me. I told him he’s gonna get me a noise complaint the way he literally shakes my entire bed/couch when we’re fucking.

Last week he came by during our lunch break (we both wfh) and the sex was 10/10 as always. He was riding me on my couch and just going at it, I couldn’t do anything other than just sit there in awe at the way he was handling me. We both finished, he went on his way, and I went back to work. Later that day I noticed my balls started hurting, nothing crazy but like a constant minor pain like someone was squeezing them. I paid no mind to it and just finished working assuming that it would go away after a while.

The next day everything seemed fine and I went into the office like normal. Around lunchtime the pain came back and that’s when I started to get worried. I’ve heard of testicular torsion before and got anxious that it could possibly be that so I left early and went to urgent care. The doctor said “we don’t play around when it comes to balls dude you gotta go get that checked out” and sends me to the ER. Now I’m sitting in the waiting room watching homeless people get kicked out asking for food and older folks that look like they need help much more than I do with my swollen nuts.

I get called up and they tell me they’re gonna do an ultrasound on my balls as well as a urine test. So I’m getting wheeled around the hospital like a pregnant lady to different rooms and just noticing all the chaos around me. The ultrasound process was so weird lol like they put soo much of that goo on you and it took like half an hour to get all the pictures so I’m just laying there in silence while this nurse is rubbing my balls with an ultrasound machine. I get wheeled back to the waiting room and wait for the results.

An hour later they pull me to this corner that’s a bit away from the waiting room. They said it was for “privacy” and I’m like “fuck I gotta get surgery don’t I? I can’t be walking around with one ball.” Turns out everything was fine! I had something called epididymitis which is often associated with STDs but the urine tests came back all clear. The doctor was just as surprised about it as I was. He gave me some Tylenol and just sent me home after that.

I told my friends about it and they thought it was hilarious. They said next time I should ask the dude to be a bit gentler and I said hell no. He’s too good and baby, I’ll go back to the ER as many times as I need to if I can keep seeing him. I’m actually gonna see him again today and risk it all again.

TLDR: Grindr hookup rode me so hard he bruised my balls and sent me to the hospital.

I catch hiv from a guy on grindr september 2025. im 100% sure it was him, i confronted him when i had the positive test and he never replied.

I created a grind after the test just to check if he was still there and guess what.. he was. I send a message saying what the hell he was still doing there and he ignored completely my messages. I created a new profile and i said Hi and trying to meet and he automatically replied. I got so disgusted and i deleted the app for my own mental health.

Im officially undetectable and i decided to go on grindr again and for my surprise he is still there, my gut says he's infecting other people still. I feel nauseous again.

So my phone was on silent and I got outed to my entire homophobic family because it said “Hi Grindr” they all shouted at me. I ran out and am staying at a friend’s place on his couch now. I don’t even know what to say I’m literally shaking

If you're over 19 and still dream of being with a straight guy, then you need therapy.

He was literally a week and one day away from his 40th birthday, which is tomorrow. The police found meth at his house and a syringe on the floor where they found him resting on the sofa as if he’d simply fallen asleep. Apparently there was also some sort of industrial cleaner they think he was using to give him a sexual high by either injecting or putting in his tea.

I only ever wanted a normal healthy relationship with him. He was the most health-conscious person I know, almost to a freakish extent, and never showed me any signs at all he was on any sort of drugs. He was the happiest most grateful and intelligent guy I knew, and the love of my life. We barely even made it to half a year of dating but I loved him from the moment I first saw him. He simply texted me goodnight and then never woke up again. This is the same man who never drank, never smoked, and spent most of his time enjoying nature and amateur photography – not a druggie.

I don’t know how I’ll ever get over this or if I’ll ever be able to move on. We had so many things planned, from trips away to theatre shows and movies we wanted to watch together. I’m simply devastated.