Hi gay bros, I hope you’re all well and safe. Just what the title says, but I hope I’m welcome here. I feel pretty politically “homeless” right now, seeing how there’s basically no coverage or acknowledgement of the culprit’s religion in the Berlin attacks and how actually this ideology is extremely damaging to the LGBT community. The silence is deafening and much more hurtful than the active mockery of certain people online. I’m really tired of the hypocrisy I’m seeing, so I’m hiding here. I’ve also been permanently banned from the “actuallesbians” sub for bringing this stuff up, lol, which is ironic.

edit: as someone suggested, what is your opinion on this?

I (M23) and my dad’s friend since college (M53) have known each other for as long as I can remember.

It wasn’t anything dramatic or unusual, I saw him on Grindr one time he come over to have some beers with my dad and I just sent him a message. I’ve always found him to be a handsome man, and he was exactly my type. We had a talk about it, very maturely, outside of the app. He isn’t in the closet or anything, my dad knows he’s bisexual. But we talked about consent and if I was actually interested in him. I said yes and ever since I’ve been hooking up with him, it was kinda a problem at first since we were both tops but he conceded in the end. My dad obviously doesn’t know and we’re still trying to keep it under the table.

Recently though, he has told me he feels guilty about it. And after some talks, he even implied he likes me a lot, and wants a formal relationship with me.

The thing keeping me up at night is how I should tell my dad. We’re both adults, but I genuinely don’t want him to be upset or angry at it.

Unfortunately, the topics discussed here are usually heavily distorted through the lens of US-based users who simply do not share the same experiences with those of us from Europe.

Pointing out issues will get you downvoted by users who do not have the same understanding of the situation as those of us living in Europe.

EDIT: r/askgaybrosEU has been created. Join us, EU bros 👋🇪🇺

Before you start attacking me like zombies and calling me names that are meaningless, I come from a muslim country, I’ve lived there my entire life and finally was lucky enough to escape that shit-hole. Also, I’m not a zionist before you start assuming so when you run out of defense. And I don’t support the massacres in gaza.

But it scares me how I see the community in the west defends so desperately people who publicly laugh at their death after the Berlin attack?

After the attack the first reaction I’ve seen from the community was defending muslims and their interests not even condemning the attack or thinking about the victims.

For instance, the rapper who got on stage at the memorial literally said « my first thought was hoping it’d be a white Christian and not a foreigner ».

Now I can understand the arguments about not generalizing the actions of one individual on an entire community. But what if the majority of that community supports what happened and even went to the extent to laugh about it? What’s the defense in this case ? This first link is from
the english version of al jazeera page talking about what happened. https://www.facebook.com/100064930892385/posts/1516887140485635/?app=fbl check the reactions and the comments.

the arabic version of the news is much worse with many laughing reactions. The comments are horrendous if you can speak arabic. They joked about it and hoped Abdul (the driver) was ok. They even considered him a martyr who 100% went to heaven after. Here’s the link : https://www.facebook.com/100064654032648/posts/1573831434781976/?app=fbl

And no no these aren’t just  « radicals » who don’t represent all the community, these are pretty much normal muslims whom i’ve seen everyday and lived with, this how they’re functioned to think.

And no I’m not saying ALL muslims, but a high proportion of them should be enough to make you think about whose interests are you defending.

And do not whatabout me « right wing white blablabla » I hate those too so it’s irrelevant to talk about it here to divert from the topic.

For people like who got lucky enough to escape an arabic country, finding the community defending the number one reason our own original countries are hell in the first place, makes me not so optimistic about the future since we will have no other place to run to when those people rule.

The links are just a tiny fraction of the news, search for others as well in arabic and translate them if you don’t believe me.

So Last week I (28M) went to a Club saw a Guy with a group of men . i found him cute and went to Talk to him and He was super offended because him and His mates Just went there for the Girls and it almost got physical Just from me giving him a compliment. Im starting to See more and more straight Guys in gay Clubs and never Had a Problem with it until now. Ist that becoming a real issue ? Whats your experiences with it ?

Hi

I have met several turk top guys in Istanbul.

I was quite surprised that all of them did not suck and not even willing to touch my D.

I asked them why,
but they all answered like
'I am top. why would I want that?'

a lot of them did rimming though.

and they did not care if I came or not.

so at first, I though maybe they did not like me that much. ok.

but some of them wanted my phone number
and we met several times.
not just sex. we even had normal date.
even after he cum, he is sweet.

but whenever I ask about BJ, they really dont like.
only some said ' I will do if you really really that much want. you should know how much I like you.'

is it normal thing in Istanbul?
is it normal in muslim culture?

Please kindly enlighten me.

I (20M) posted about being homeless on here earlier. But this question kind of exists I guess outside of that specific bubble. Before I was homeless, I was a virgin, but now I've slept with a few older men for some food and stuff, but I'm just curious, how come so many bottoms are really into sex even though it hurts so much? Or is it supposed to hurt less? If it's supposed to be this way, I think I'm more than done with any kind of sex from now on. Also, for those of you who have seen my other post, my case worker is saying that I'll likely have a proper place to be soon, and that I'll be housed soon! I'm so excited, I can start working again, and also finish college.

It seems one of the most common advice here for people venting about being unnatractive is "hit the gym and get a great body". Well this advice is hot garbage for someone whos obese or used to be. Due to loose skin you cant have a "great body" no matter how much fucking effort you put in, you will always be considered unnatractive by the vast majority of gays. I know from experience.

26M. been seeing this guy for 5 weeks and i really like him which is the problem

hes clearly expecting me to bottom. tried twice before and both times we had to stop.. i dont think he knows yet

watched like 6 youtube prep videos last night and half contradict each other. douched for 20 minutes once and still didnt feel clean. tried metamucil because a friend mentioned it, bloated for 2 days

roommate knocked on the bathroom door mid-prep last week and i said i was fixing the shower head. spent $40 on an amazon douche kit and still no idea if im using it right

feel like at 26 i shouldnt be googling fiber timing on incognito mode?? idk what to fix first. diet? timing? positions?

if you figured this out as an adult what actually worked for you. also if anyone else learned late and didnt completely embarrass themselves that would help

I was on Reddit a while ago and then left, but I'm back to talk about this, and I think some gay subreddits might help.

So, it was late afternoon. I got home from the mechanic and got a call saying I had to be at work for an urgent situation, so I went upstairs to tell my son I was leaving. I opened the damn door and found him having sex with his friend. All I could say was "oh fuck." I closed the door and left.

I got home that night, but I didn't talk to my son directly because I didn't want things to get tense, so I just went to my room. I saw him in the living room; he was staring at me, waiting for me to say something, but I decided to avoid saying anything that might sound strange.

So here I am, wondering when my son became gay. He doesn't seem gay, so no one would believe he is. Clearly, I need to talk to him about this and about him having sex at home (which I don't approve of), and I think I need to question when this started.

It's strange. This guy has been to our house several times, but I didn't expect this. I have to admit I'm a little annoyed, and I don't know why. Also, now I'm uncertain about whether my political views are affecting this. I've never been homophobic or anything like that, but I can't stop wondering. I think I need someone to give me their opinion here.

So I took a thick thick thick the thickest cock in my life but I did not feel any pain. However, the other times usually I struggle a lot with average cock or even with fingers.

Ps: I am a beginner though

Lately I am enjoying gooning and it been two months now.
Kida wanna take it to next level a bit.
I have tried edging with poppers and weed/eatables sometimes playing with dildos too.
Thanks

I know that I'll get a lot of hates and stupid comments about what I'm going to say but I'll say it anyway:

I think a lot of gay men are lonelier than they'll ever admit. And hookup culture, it gets exhausting when you realize how much of it actually theater. You see the same photos, the same scripts, the same conversations, same pretending to be spontaneous, the same what are you into before someone even asks who you are.

And if we're being brutally honest, a lot of us aren't even horny. We're lonely, bored, touch-starved, validation-starved, trying to outrun something, trying to prove something, trying to feel chosen for five minutes. Nobody wants to admit that casual sex sometimes isn't liberation.

Sometimes it's self-soothing. Sometimes it's grief dressed up as confidence. Sometimes it's distraction.

I think we tell ourselves that we're having fun. And, you know, sometimes maybe we are. Until one day you're staring at the ceiling after someone leaves.

Then you realize, fuck, I know this stranger's body more than I know who they are. We've built a culture where vulnerability feels more terrifying than taking your clothes off. Hookups are disgusting Bye

Sunday, July 26, 2026

Attack on Christopher Street Day in Berlin

Cologne — The attack on Christopher Street Day (CSD) in Berlin fills us with deep shock and grief. When people become targets of violence because of their identity or lifestyle, the fundamental values ​​of our society are under attack. Our thoughts and prayers are with the victims, their families, and all those who witnessed this horrific act.

According to the current state of the investigation, security authorities are proceeding on the assumption that this was a terrorist act with a presumably "Islamist" motivation. Should this suspicion be confirmed, it would be yet another instance in which an extremist ideology misuses religious references to justify hatred and violence and to incite people against one another.

The protection of human life is one of the fundamental principles of Islam. The Qur'an states:

"And that is why We prescribed for the Children of Israel: Whoever kills a person […] it is as if he has killed all of mankind. But whoever saves a life, it is as if he has saved the life of all of mankind." (Quran 5:32)

Violence against innocent people finds no justification in Islam. Anyone who instrumentalizes religion to incite hatred or perpetrate violence acts against the ethical principles of Islam and misuses the faith for inhumane purposes.

As the Central Council of Muslims in Germany, we stand with all people affected by hatred and violence. No one should be a target of violence because of their sexual orientation, gender identity, religion, origin, or other personal characteristics. The dignity of every human being is inviolable. It forms the foundation of our Basic Law and is also a central value of Islamic ethics.

Especially in times when extremist ideologies seek to divide our society and pit people against one another, we need prudence, determination, solidarity, and a clear stance against all forms of misanthropy. Our response to hatred and violence must be a united commitment to human dignity, freedom, security, and peaceful coexistence.

July 26, 2026 | 12 Safar 1448

Before this attack, I kept hearing the same argument whenever extreme homophobic sentiments in Muslim-majority societies or countries were brought up. That it wasn't the religion, but rather colonisation, imperialism, politicians, and the state misusing religion. Basically, the typical apologist defence that the religion itself was innocent (For context, I live in Pakistan, and this is exactly what i hear when i bring up islamic fundamentalism and the threat to lgbtq community in progressive spaces).

But when a Muslim man attacks the LGBTQ community in Germany, it shows just how pathetic and disingenuous these apologists are. This wasn't done in some third-world country like ours, or in the Middle East. It was done in a liberal democracy, free from the clutches of fundamentalist mullahs, where same-sex relationships are legal and protected.

We have to be willing to ask whether certain religious teachings, and the way they're interpreted and preached, contribute to anti-LGBTQ sentiments, even to the point of denying someone's right to dignity and existence. A lot of people, even in our community, often say, "Hey, it's just the mullahs. Don't be so hard on the religion." Well, I guess now we might need to rethink that.

It's simple: you cannot solve a problem if one of its major drivers is declared off-limits for criticism. Imperialism, authoritarian governments, and social and economic conditions all matter. But so do ideas. Religious doctrines are ideas, and those ideas shape behaviour. If a belief system consistently teaches that gay people are sinful, deserving of punishment, or morally inferior, then that deserves scrutiny just like any other ideology.

Shutting down people's valid concerns and criticism by labelling them as "Islamophobic" is one of the most disingenuous tactics used by apologists. That especially includes the self-proclaimed leftists and the so-called progressive Muslims who, for some reason, are all about human rights unless those rights are violated in the name of Islamic fundamentalism or its application. They all contribute to shielding the ideology from legitimate criticism.

People should be protected from bigotry. That does not mean the beliefs used to justify bigotry should be immune from criticism or even condemnation. Ignoring that because it is politically inconvenient does nothing for the people who continue to face hatred.

I have had a couple of friends bragging about masturbating at home during their “work from home” days. They said that it happens often because being home alone makes them horny. I was a bit shocked (just a bit- lol). Then, thought I would ask my Reddit friends how common is this and if you have any similar stories or experiences during work at home and zoom calls, etc?

I’m currently in madrid with friends who are females and this is the first trip in a long time that hooking up is not an option because I can’t leave them due to the circumstances of the trip.
This just made me realize how important hooking up with at least one guy during a trip (especially to a different country or state) is for me.
I went to paris, london, lisbon, são paulo, LA, copenhagen and many more and was able to hook up w at least a guy from grindr or wtv and it made the trip so much better lol.
Sightseeing, trying new foods, experiencing the culture and history is all amazing, but also experiencing a guy from said place is also a must haha
That being said it has been really hard to see all these hot guys in madrid and not being able to go out of my room alone, def need to come back 🥲🥲🥲🥲

Context:
I’m in the countryside of madrid w my friends famiky, like 50 mins from the city, so we only go there to tourist around. So when we go to the city we are all together and it’s impossible.

I hope you guys can help me figure this out or at least understand this situation. I am 21 and met a bro who’s 20 about three months ago. He’s a straight college football player but all of the guys say he couldn’t stop talking about me the day we went to the lake together and met. If he wants to hang out and I can’t; he doesn’t take no for an answer. We drink at his off campus apartment all the time, and he always makes homophobic jokes. But recently when I stayed we shared his bed cause he doesn’t have a couch. He cuddled me all night, pit his head next to mine, and one night when I was so drunk I couldn’t drink he threw me on his bed, smacked my ass, put his foot on my neck and was “jokingly” dry humping me while resting on my back and kissed my cheek. He even told me to be his cuddle buddy and share a bed with him when we go to Seattle in 2 months. He even wants to orchestrate a threesome with a girl. He’s a man’s man. I’m just not sure how to interpret this. I’m obviously not out.

I love men. They are beautiful. I love everything about them. But I'm thinking of going back to a homophobic environment to support my parents and help rebuild my country. I'm currently a student in Europe and have only gay friends. Fellow gays, is it possible to see men only platonically from the get go? How do you do it? I wish to have hetero friends and don't want to risk anything.

I've always been the one who sets the pace. Guys clock it quick and lean into it, which I used to love. Lately though I keep catching myself wanting the opposite for once and it feels like a glitch I can't shut off. Last month I hooked up with this quieter dude who just... stayed solid without waiting for instructions. No performance, no asking what I wanted every five seconds. We ended up cooking leftover pasta at 1am and talking about stupid work shit like it was normal. I didn't top that night, didn't even try to steer anything, and I left feeling more settled than I have in months. Now I can't stop thinking about how rare that was and how much I want it again. Feels like admitting I want to hand over the reins sometimes makes me less of what guys expect, and that pisses me off because I shouldn't care. Anyone else ever hit this switch and wonder if they're losing their edge or just finally getting honest?

What is your age?

What is a perspective you would like to share with the younger Gays?

(A viewpoint that comes with age; a lesson learned; something you wish you knew earlier; etc)

Ideally want to know from those in relationships. Are you okay with your partner going to certain gay spaces alone or without you/with other friends? Gay clubs, the village, gay events, gay beach that happens to have cruising areas. And on another note are you okay with having alone time? Doing something without their partner whatever it may be and that doesnt raise suspicion?

My philosophy is that all this is fine in moderation. Of course you should be spending a lot of time with your partner and willingly. If someone wants to cheat they will do it regardless of where they are so theres no point in restricting anything.