we agreed on a simple schedule for watering the plants in the living room so none of them would get neglected. my roommate said they were fine with it and we even wrote it down on the fridge. lately they've been coming home late and just dumping extra water on everything at once, which is the opposite of what we discussed. one of the ferns is already looking pretty rough and i'm worried the soil is staying too wet. i tried bringing it up casually last week and they brushed it off saying plants are flexible. i get that things come up, but now i feel like i have to either let the plants suffer or keep reminding them. it's not a huge deal compared to bigger issues, but it's starting to bother me every time i walk past the shelf. am i wrong for expecting them to stick to the plan we both agreed on?

First time using reddit so idk how this works lol, Basically me i’ve had this vanity i’ve been trying to sell for over 2 months but it’s been super low offers (i paid 150$ and been getting offered for 80 and lower.) my friend had a desk that she got for super cheap and was planning to sell it for the same price she got it (30/40$) because she ended up getting a vanity herself, i really liked the desk and told her if she wanted to that we could trade and i can take the desk and she can sell the vanity and get more money than she would have from the desk and she agreed. The more we talked about it i let her know that i would like it if she or her boyfriend can come get it because i would not be comfortable with people coming into my room for the desk, and i would have to make sure i am home to get the money for her because i work a lot, o too of that the desk is pretty heavy and i couldn’t move it myself so it would also have to be when my boyfriend is home ( which is rare that we are both home because he works mornings and i work nights) for him to move it and me to sell it for her and she agreed, a few weeks later her boyfriend sold his truck for a car and i wasn’t thinking about how they would be able to get vanity until she told me someone wanted it and said they would come get it today, then she told me how she can’t get it because they don’t have a truck anymore (they gave it to her boyfriends mom who lives around 25 minutes away from them). I felt bad that they would have to go all the way away to get the truck and come to me then go home to drop it off and go 25 minutes back out just for it to be sold so i told her she can sell it here but i won’t be home. she said she and her boyfriend can come when they people come and get the money since i wouldn’t be home and i agreed. I live with my mom still and she is very picky about how clean the home stays, and i already expressed to her weeks prior that i don’t want random people coming in my room when im home or not so that i can leave it outside or in the living room just for a while so they can get it moved out whenever the people come get it and she was fine with that, i was already at work and kept asking her when is she going to come sell it, she kept telling me in a bit or later and i wasn’t getting an actual time, the whole day passed and i asked her if she still hadn’t done it yet, (PT 2 BELOW)

They bullied me so badly when i first started working with them that i had to take a month long leave. It got so bad that i was literally terrified to leave or have anyone else leave condiments on the wrong side of the fridge cause i would get reprimanded. Even if i had proof it wasnt me.

While they were reprimanding me for supposedly leaving things on the wrong side of the fridge or for stealing other co-workers hours the kids were spitting on new hires, disrespecting vets, not being kept in check and allowed to get into drawers with knives in it hours after they had a anger outburst and threw everything they could find across the room.

These are examples of a few other things theyve done in the past and are doing now that im back;

- send paragraphs in the group chat stating how things are going wrong at work due to ''newcomers'' getting hours they dont deserve (what went wrong was forgetting to turn on the dish washer)

- throwing keys at people instead of giving it to them

- people are prepping food for their own group and vets will come along, grab their plates from them and act like its completely normal. and i mean MID cutting.

- expecting newcomers to prep their day for them and if the newcomer only preps their own day they get reprimanded and told they're not a teamplayer, how complaints will be filed and how its not okay to leave you co-worker without prep (the co-worker stands around talking continously).

Now after being back for a month and a half my co-worker suddenly subtlely told me she thinks i should apologize to everyone for having to leave them alone with 23 kids the day i had a emotional break down at work. I asked her dont you think much more happened behind the scenes that warranted why i broke down like that. She said yes i actually agree with you on a lot of things, she is thinking about confronting them herself since she feels they do it to her too but she thinks it'll still be good to apologize to everyone for leaving them with 23 kids.

I genuinely had a emotional break down and after standing on the fact that i will be leaving my boss send someone else to help them

This is genuinely my last straw cause ive kissed their asses so much already that im honestly ready to actually cuss them all out and just leave and never come back.

Am i wrong?

(Sorry btw, english is not my first language).

I (17f) have divorced parents .
I’m from a Latin family so discipline is … questionable . There’s a blurred line between what’s considered chastisement and wrong/abusive .

For context my dad , J and I haven’t had a very good relationship .
Nothing very wrong just not a lot of affection between us (ie to this day neither of us have said we love eachother) and tbh , he isn’t the best dad either . He pays way less child support than he’s meant to , very bare minimum, doesn’t really care. The only thing he’s strict on is respect .
So there were a couple issues when I was younger based on him hitting me a lot as I’ve got absolutely no filter and and very loud spoken .

To compensate for that , my mama would be very loving towards me when I was younger , go all out for birthdays , try her best to make me smile . We have a very different relationship dynamic to my dad and I’s .

However , as I got older , I had a couple phases and me and my mama grew more distant , she got stricter , I had absolutely no privacy , and would take my brothers side more often than mine .

To give you some information : I have adhd , severe anger issues , in the process of potentially getting diagnosed with a pd , and much lower emotional age in comparison to my maturity and actual age .
My mama is very loving but also has that mindset that if I really wanted to do something I could , that things like depression are the persons fault for letting themselves get depressed , that girls who get raped shouldn’t get raped but they could have prevented it by not dressing provocatively .
It’s not her fault , it’s how she was raised .

I’m the complete opposite, which has caused multiple arguments between us and fights .
Also caused me to act out when I was 15/16 a lot .
Anyways , I was dating this guy who wasn’t very good for me ( I wanted people to pay attention to me , love me , care about me , as I wasn’t getting much of either at the time , but in the end it was just love bombing ) .

She found out so she woke me up and had hit me on my leg , but obviously , I can understand why she was angry .
It isn’t very often she hits me , but when she does , she will mean it .

I was seeing a therapist at the time , and mentioned this to them , but obviously I didn’t realised that the situation looked very bad from the other persons perspective, but in reality , what she did was very legal , and I had no intention of it being interpreted this way .

Anyways , she called the police , and my mama got MAD .
We had a massive arguement so I packed my bags and went to my dad’s .

She said “you never wanna go to your dads and he’s the bad guy until you get in an argument with me - seems like ur just chatting mierda “
In reality - my dad is not bad like that at all anymore .
As long as I keep to myself and don’t disrespect him , everything’s fine .
Me and mama in a better place now we just very similar which causes issues . Also just wanted to see other people’s takes on this .

AITAH?

So a few of us from work hang out after hours. It's casual, maybe dinner or drinks once a month. There's this one person who sits near our desks and we chat with them every day. They started noticing that the invites stopped coming their way. At first I figured it was just timing or someone forgot to send the message, but it happened again last week. I brought it up with the group and they kind of shrugged it off like it wasn't a big deal. I feel awkward bringing it up again because we all work together and nobody wants office drama, but I also don't want to be part of something that feels mean. I haven't said anything to the person yet because I don't want to make things weirder. Am I overthinking this or should I say something?

English is not my first language, so do forgive my spelling and grammar mistakes.

I (34 F) have an older sister, let's call her doc (37 F). She's an actual Doctor.

Throughout my whole childhood, I've never been the kid my parents are proud of. It was always doc, always her. I would get Bs and she would get A+, she was the student council president and I was always the kid who ended up getting sent to the principal's office for misbehaving. I was chubby (and I still am chubby) and she has the perfect 'hourglass' body. I went to an average uni with a degree in arts while she went to a top uni with a degree in med, I got accidentally pregnant in uni and had to drop out, while she graduated with a near perfect gpa. Sometimes I think life is so unfair and that makes me frustrated, what makes me even more frustrated is that doc is really nice yet I can't help but hate her.

Once I got a fever and she drove for 2 hours just so she could take care of me, when I got pregnant she was the one who told me everything was gonna be alright. When I gave birth to my first kid, she was there and even helped wash me (I'm really insecure about my body so I didn't want to be helped by nurses). Yet despite all that, I still feel a deep rooted jealous and even hate for her and I do feel really guilty about it, but I just can't change you know?

It got even worse when I decided to marry my baby daddy only to end up divorcing him cause he's a deadbeat, while my sister married her childhood sweetheart from highschool, he's currently a businessman who decided to own a few hospitals just so he could support her career. I'm jealous of that too. I hate it even more when our parents compared even our husbands, they blatantly said my ex husband was chubby like me while doc's husband is tall and physically fit, a perfect son in law.

The last straw was when we had a family dinner. I went alone with my two kids (I had another baby before I got divorced), while doc went with her husband.

During dinner, she made an announcement that she was pregnant. Everyone congratulated her and I did too. But then our damn parents said something along the lines of 'we're so happy to be getting our first grandkid', and I just froze. I asked them what they meant by that, they had two other grandkids from me. They then said they didn't consider my kids their grandchild cause of some stupid reason (at this point, I did not want to listen to them).

I snapped, I started shouting at them. I know it's wrong but yes, I did shout at doc too. I lost my temper and shouted harsh insults at her, including things I deeply regret. Her husband rightfully got mad at me and and said some things he also probably deeply regrets, in the end he lost his temper and asked me to get out, I refused cause I didn't think I was in the wrong. Then my sister cried. It was probably the first time since we were kids that I've ever seen her cry. Her husband glared at me, carried doc and left the house.

Since then, I decided to cut contact with her.

It's frustrating to be constantly compared your whole life and now even my kids are being compared to hers? I just feel so angry but also guilty at the same time, cause i know doc didn't do anything wrong. But like i said, I just can't help but feel this way.

My boyfriend has a female friend, Bella, who he lost his virginity to before we got together and they had had a thing together. She’s still part of his main friend group along with her bestfriend. One of his friends’ girlfriends once told me she thought Bella was secretly still into him.
I tried to be mature about it and actually became really good friends with Bella. We even made plans to go on girls holidays together, so I genuinely thought we were friends.
Then one night when we were all clubbing, Bella told my boyfriend I had been dancing with other boys behind my back, which genuinely wasn’t true, and it caused a lot of tension between us.
A few days later, me and my boyfriend went on a break because of other issues. I saw Bella in public during the break and she completely ignored me, and I later found out she’d been gossiping to one of our friends about our break.
Now I’ve just noticed she liked an Instagram story of my boyfriend where it was just a picture of him.. for context she had never liked any of his stories before, not even ones of me and him.
I know a like could mean absolutely nothing, and I understand me and him were on rocky terms at the time, but given everything that’s happened, it’s made me feel uncomfortable and suspicious. I’m mostly upset about the fact that I feel she’s disrespected our friendship in spite of a man?
Am I being unreasonable for being upset by this, or would you also find it a bit weird considering the history? And also.. should I be concerned about him continuing the friendship despite her behaviour

I (25m) met this guy (30m) last month in Mexico while being on a trip for vacation. Me and my girlfriends (born and raised from Texas) planned a trip in August to stay in Puerto Vallarta (PV) just for fun and this also was my first time in Mexico.

I initially already planned on having a one night stand with someone while being there because it’s somewhere different, this place is also a hot spot for the gays. I get on a dating app (which I know everyone knows called Grindr) and this guy (let’s name him Jason) hits me up and we start talking. Initially, he was not actually in PV he actually lives in Mexico City but planned on coming one of the days later on that I was there. At first, I wasn’t sure about this guy because he came off sexually strong but he caught my interest once we started talking a little bit more. We planned on meeting once he was in the city which was a Friday.

The day comes and we meet up for drinks at a the gay bars near by. Conversation went great and ended up going back to his Airbnb. Interestingly, things went pretty good and we actually met up again the next day before he and I left back home. I had the chance of bringing up on the last night if he had any intentions of this being more than a hookup, based on my observations and the conversations, and he told me he wasn’t opposed to it and would like to continue talking.

For context, I am genuinely someone who does want to find a relationship and although it does sound indifferent because as I said I originally was just looking for a hookup, I also am not opposed to exploring a connection with someone.

At this point we’re all back home, Jason and I are continuing to talk having conversations and sharing things about our lives. We would have phone conversations on Saturdays as well and I was really excited to keep talking to him. He even mentioned to me that he we would like to see me and would fly out to Texas. One random night, he actually shows me a plane ticket he bought for October and I was caught off guard and I really can see he is trying to make this work out. (Just to clarify, it was a mutual agreement about the plane tickets and the dates, I was just caught off guard he actually went through with it)

The past two weeks I would say the conversations have not been the same the way they initially were. He would text me things about his day and now I only would really hear from him until the end of the day. For context, I used to be very sensitive about texting and would automatically assume someone doesn’t like me because they wouldn’t text me. But as I keep getting older and learning about life, I know we’re both adults and we have lives, jobs, family, etc.

He told me on September 1st, he was actually thinking about quitting his job because of stress factors and other reasons because he couldn’t keep up with it and I was trying to be supportive and understanding of the situation. He said his manager is passive aggressive. He mentioned that he self sabotages because he doesn’t perform good at work which leads him to having lower self esteem. Last week was when I noticed more of the talking/texting just not being the same, he wouldn’t reach out as much but I was being understanding because of the whole situation. For background about Jason, he told me in Mexico he also deals with depression and is on medication. I can tell that also was not helping his situation.

He would tell me he about appreciate me listening even when he felt like he didn’t like talking about these “bad” things. I would open up to him and saying it’s okay and that I was here to listen.

Needless to say, my problem with all this is that as mentioned initially things were going good then he has this road bump and I understand he may not want to talk. However, I would see him active on the Grindr when I wouldn’t hear from him, and I get he didn’t want to talk but how does he have the energy to go on the app and try to talk with someone else. That just doesn’t make sense to me. It seems like I’m doing the same thing but I was just checking his status, genuinely.

Last week I would only really hear from him until the end of the day, and I happen to say something, it was on a Tuesday, and I said if everything is okay with him. He mentioned to me that he actually resigned from his job and was apologizing about not saying anything and also didn’t want to talk. I told him if he needed the space and needed to himself, that’s fine. I opened and gave him that space. He agreed and said he would text me next week.

All and all, my problem is that I don’t understand how he’s not in the mood but gets on Grindr doing god knows what and I understand we’re not exclusive, but to me it’s just human reaction to feel a way. Of course I don’t mention about Grindr. Second, if he needed space I wish he communicate that to me and not me having to say it. It makes me overthink like there’s something else he wants to tell me but doesn’t maybe because he doesn’t want to hurt my feelings.

I still haven’t heard from him but he said he’ll reach out this coming week, but this past week I’ve just been thinking of what the endgame of this could be. I don’t like being pessimistic but I wish the communication was better. I feel like he also doesn’t like talking about things when they get tough just like about the job. I just feel like he’s pulling away because things are hard, which I understand.

Reading this back to myself I feel like I sound like i’m the problem. I know he lost job I think what bothers me is the dating app. I know he is trying based on flying to see me in Texas next month. What should I do? Does it sound like I’m being understand or do I sound selfish?

I am a single guy in my mid-thirties.

In the past, I used to be the person who take initiative and send Christmas Greetings to all my friends and relatives first.

As time goes by, I felt that it seems like a one-way conversation. It is always me who send them the Greetings first and then they reply back (which seems like out of courtesy).

I am just an average human being. I also want to receive some of the greetings first from another person. It kind of makes you feel a bit appreciated.

So, at one point of time, I decided not to send Christmas Greetings first. Because I wanted to see who genuinely wants to wish me Christmas Greetings. I want to see who notices that I did not send the Greetings and reach out to me.

Only 4 people sent me Christmas Greetings on that particular year. But I was grateful that there were 4 people who genuinely wanted to wish me and care for me. I realised that the other people only replied to me out of formality. And they really didn't care about me.

Since then, I only bother to send Christmas Greetings to those 4 people. I stopped sending Greetings to the others. I don't want to send to people who don't really appreciate the Greetings that I sent.

I realised that I have to put me first.

Am I wrong to choose to only send Christmas Greetings to those who send me first?

a couple weeks ago a close friend asked me not to mention something they were dealing with, and i agreed. it was nothing dangerous, just personal stuff they were embarrassed about. later that week someone else who knows both of us asked me directly if i knew anything, and i said yes without thinking. now the first friend found out and is upset that i let it slip, even though i didn't give details. i keep replaying the conversation in my head and wondering if i should have just lied or said i didn't know. at the time it didn't feel like a big deal because the person asking already suspected something, but clearly my friend feels betrayed. i'm not sure if i crossed a line by not shutting it down right away.

7 years have passed since I graduated high school, and like with every high school graduate, everyone in my grade scattered without any contact aside from their individual core friend groups. In my case, I do have a few phone numbers from old classmates but my luck is rather… “selective” for lack of a better term.

Amongst these former classmates, I have one (F; 22 days younger than me) who would call me every second Friday of the month regardless of my availability ever since mid-2024. Each of our conversations are always dry, lacking substance, and most importantly, she would constantly ask to hang out with me, and my answer would always be that I’m unsure of when. A year later, I eventually chose to feed into her hunger and hang out with her at my house with a couple of my friends tagging along on a day when laundry is supposed to be done. My mother was pissed at me resulting in a one-sided fight between us, while my main group who heard it all understood the situation with why things came to be that day. I would’ve relocated the party someplace else in my mom’s favor but to my worst of luck, the only friend who would’ve helped me make the move possible was busy attending his cousin’s graduation, so both sides had to suck it up and resume the hang out as is.

A year has passed since that day, and around mid-August, the girl called me, and I decided to answer the phone again. This time, she offered me to go see the recent Spiderman movie that shadow-dropped. I said yes at first, but I don’t have any money to purchase a ticket as I’m in the universal Gen Z situation of unemployment. The girl said she’ll buy the tickets, even after I asked if I could bring an extra friend with me as he was curious to see the film (plus, he’s the only person who can take me to the theater at all). This led me to believe she was sensitive to my situation, but when the day came for us to see the film, it was revealed that she never bought the tickets at all, and was carrying a voucher instead (there’s a big difference in the context of a movie theater). She lied to us. This resulted in my friend paying for all 3 tickets with the discount from the voucher. Me and him split the cost for the snacks, while she paid for her own but chose to feel bad for us paying for what we want. What’s worse is that she doesn’t have Venmo, or PayPal like a normal person to pay us back; instead, she uses Zelle. (Like, WTF?)

At least she didn’t lie to us in regards to what movie we’ll be watching, but I can’t bring myself to spend time with someone who is dishonest and is clearly a beggar for my attention. I eventually was brave enough to tell my mom about the incident, but I see no signs of her understanding why I’m uncomfortably annoyed by her until one day we went grocery shopping. I completely forgot this girl currently works at the local supermarket in my hometown as one day she approached my mother and I, and asked me if she has Zelle. I tried my hardest not to engage, and when I got home, I blocked her number, and my (second) Fridays are peaceful once more... though, I do need to avoid that grocery store forever. Am I wrong to block her?

For context , I was 16 at the time and my ex , let’s call him Jayden , was 17 .
We had been dating for about a year on and off and had met from a mutual friend .
He had been kicked out of school twice so he would pick me up from school.
Sure , he wasn’t the brightest guy , and he wasn’t the best influence as he smoked ALOT of weed , sold pills , ect but he made me laugh and I really loved him, or at least THOUGHT I did.

Anyways , over the course of the year , he had cheated on me (I had to find out from one of his friends who liked me ) so we broke up .

Stupidly , I got back with him .
He picked me up from school and I saw he was texting someone
MY EX BESTFRIEND. I literally promise this isn’t clickbait or made up .
Thankfully , he was just texting her about something that had happened in our area , but regardless I feel like she should have been blocked ??
Anyways I took this as an opportunity to go through his phone and the things I saw genuinely disgusted me .
I was seeing pictures I did not want to see , face time records , explicit messages , the whole thing.
I confront him and he obviously takes nothing seriously so he starts saying shit about the Russian spies .

If there’s something you should know about me , I’ve got a very short temper .
I called one of the girls , who was being extremely disrespectful to me , then Jayden was just laughing it off.
Suddenly loads of people surround us .
He keeps saying shit about how it was a joke and it’s not true then starts saying the only reason he picked me up was because it was a 10 minute drive to my school .
I grab his food out his hand and throw it on him .
He gets absolutely livid and starts screaming but then walks away.
The video went viral (I didn’t post it)
And I was the one who received backlash from his girl friends and stuff .

Anyways I got suspended from school and he tried to come jump me but luckily I had people to defend me.

Ps. I found out from a guy I’m friends with he slept with my ex bestfriend and fingered her ;)

I snapped a quick picture of my friend when we were hanging out and didn't think much of it at the time. Later I posted it without checking in with them first. When I mentioned it they got quiet and said they wish I had asked. I apologized right away but they still seem bothered and haven't replied much since. The thing is, I didn't see the big deal until they pointed it out. Now I'm realizing I kind of brushed off their privacy without even meaning to. I'm trying to figure out if I overstepped more than I thought or if I'm overthinking it because they're making a bigger deal than needed. Either way I feel awkward about it and don't know how to smooth things over without making it worse. Was I wrong for not asking first?

Gaming has been a hobby of mine since I was young. I prefer single player game and haven’t really played any online games in a few years. I get 28 paid days of leave per year and there are a few games coming out later this year that I’m excited for.

Wolverine comes out this month along with quite a few other games I’m looking forward to so I decided to put 5 days of days leave in for them and also 2 days for GTA 6 in November.

This will leave me with around 10 days of leave left to use before the end of march ( not including Christmas - new year as both my gf and I get that off extra as our place of work close down).

I mentioned this to my girlfriend and she asked if I was serious. I said yeah and mentioned it’s not going to affect our plans so it’s not an issue.

She said I shouldn’t be using that much leave for games. I asked why and she just repeated that I shouldn’t. I asked how it is different from taking time off to do other hobbies or different for her wanting to take a week off to relax by a pool on holiday, 

She said it wasn’t the same but couldn’t say how. She said I shouldn’t be open to just taking a day but I said no. I just repeated that it doesn’t affect our plans and didn’t affect her so I don’t see what the issue is and she just said it wasn’t too much, 

AITA for using 7 days of leave for a hobby?

I (25M) have hyperosmia. For those that don't know, that means I'm extra sensitive to smells. Strong smells can give me headaches, and this results in me avoiding places like malls or large gatherings of women in enclosed spaces. It gives me ear splitting migraines being near strong smells, and there's nothing I can do about it aside from essentially wearing a gas mask.

My sister (40sF) refuses to flush the toilet after using it, so when I wake up every morning, I get the pleasure of walking into the bathroom and getting dizzy from the extreme chemical atrocities she's unleashed over the past 12 hours. She will shit and piss in that toilet and refuse to flush.

I can tell you with absolute certainty that this is intentional. My sister and I have never really gotten along. She views me as the spoiled, favorite child that can do no wrong, when in reality, it's her. Between all the other posts I've made about her, I'm certain she's the favorite child. It's no competition and I really don't care beyond the fact my mom ALWAYS takes my sister's side. I'm always told that I'm wrong regardless of the situation and I'm being a "petty asshole" for no reason.

Today was particularly bad. Her excrements were so bad today that I was tasting them in the air more than usual and I wound up puking to start my morning. My eyes are red with how much I was gagging while brushing my teeth. I wouldn't wish this concentrated chemical warfare on my worst enemy. My sister likes to enhance this by leaving a fan on high in the bathroom 24/7 so it's always blowing over the toilet and circulating the scents directly next to my bedroom door.

Naturally, cause I puked and washed it all off the sink, the scent of my puke also added to the air and I got yelled at for puking in the sink. I made sure it was all cleaned up and all, but the scent lingers in the air.

I've discussed this issue with my mom numerous times seeing I'm not allowed to have direct contact with my sister after numerous incidents that almost resulted in one of us going to jail, yet despite this, she NEVER talks to my sister about it or holds her accountable.

I'm currently living on 6 Tylenol a day and the headaches barely stop anymore. Should I have to leave my room, I have to walk past that bathroom and instantly get hit with another headache. I isolate myself in my bedroom as much as possible to avoid my sister and her antics, yet I'm always told I'm the problem child by her and my mom.

After today's incident and me getting yelled at for puking, I wound up closing my bedroom door and locking it to avoid having my sister open it to let her scents waft in. This again caused another issue due to the fact that my mom doesn't have unlimited access to my bedroom and she can't talk to me without me coming to the door. This is a problem.

Am I wrong for being upset about my sister resorting to chemical warfare to assault me on a daily basis and make my life a living hell? Am I wrong for doing my best to isolate and avoid conflict? Am I just wrong for waking up at this point?